Losing the Blues

Losing the Blues
by Kittie

It was morning. Adam and Billy sat silently at the kitchen table, munching on Eggo waffles. Neither of them had gotten any sleep, having stayed up all night talking. Their conversation had been a long, sprawling one. It had gone from "the good old days" to Adam's time in the hospital, to marveling about how much Bulk and Skull had changed.... There was really no continuity at all. Adam would burst out crying at random intervals, Billy would get intermittent headaches, and both of them would knock themselves out trying to comfort the other. By the time morning rolled around, both of them had calmed down considerably. Adam's tears seemed to have dried up, and Billy's head was feeling a bit better, but both of them stayed on the alert. One could never be too sure...

"Enjoying your waffles?" Adam asked.

"Yeah. They're just Eggos. What's not to like?"

Adam chuckled. "Not much, I guess." He paused and stared hard at Billy for a long while.

_Uh, oh._ Billy started to get nervous again. _I know that look._ Sure enough, Adam burst into tears yet again. "What? What?"

"I'm sorry," he laughed. "I can't help it. You're sitting in my kitchen eating Eggo waffles like nothing ever happened! This is so bizarre! And now you're younger than me! I used to think of you like a big brother. Does that mean you're my little brother now, or what?"

Billy relaxed a little. Despite the tears, Adam's mood seemed unchanged. "I don't know," he said. "I could still be your big brother, I'd just be... you know, younger."

"You make no sense." They were laughing again, and Billy was glad for the mirth. The previous night had been rather draining.

Adam sobered up a bit and took his hand. "Billy, I have to tell you... I am so glad you're back. I went nuts... literally... without you. You always seemed to know what to say to make me feel better. I depended on you for that guidance. Losing you... it was like losing a member of my family."

"Your brother," clarified Billy quietly.

Adam nodded. "Exactly. It wasn't your fault, what happened to me. I was halfway there already. I just... without you to talk to, I didn't talk to anyone, and it built up inside me. You know about that."

"All too well," Billy smiled slightly. He remembered the talks they used to have. He would tell Adam over and over that holding everything inside would only make him feel worse, and yet, he could never bring himself to take his own advice. "I was a walking time bomb."

Adam's eyes widened. "You were a what?!"

"Walking time-- Oh!"

They dissolved into hysterical laughter again at the inadvertent pun. "We... we need some sleep!" gasped Adam, trying to control himself.

"Tell me about it," said a voice at the door. Tommy stood there, leaning against the door frame. "You guys woke up the whole house!"

"Sorry...." Billy was still laughing too hard to speak properly. His voice wavered comically, which only made Adam laugh harder.

Tommy shook his head and went for the refrigerator. "I'm glad you're enjoying yourselves. Is there any pizza left?" Adam nodded, still wheezing with laughter. _I think the old boy's gone nuts again,_ Tommy thought, eying him strangely.

Adam noticed the look on Tommy's face and turned to Billy. "He thinks I've gone nuts again. Tell him he's wrong."

Billy turned around. "He didn't take his pill last night." Adam punched him in the arm and he yelped. "Hey! Okay, okay! He's fine, really!"

Tommy took out the last box for pizza and opened it, making a face. "Hmph. Black olives." He sat down at the table and began to eat.

"Cold pizza for breakfast, I can take." Skull walked in, wearing a rumpled T-shirt and shorts. "But black olives? Tommy, you disgust me."

"Hi Skull," they chorused.

"Hey," Tommy said with his mouth full. "Those girls... Shouldn't they be home with their parents?"

Skull considered this. "I guess. We were so excited we didn't think about it. Shanie insisted on coming along for the ride, and Katie seemed to be pretty much in charge. Maybe we should ask Bulk about it."

"About what?" Bulk lumbered into the kitchen, yawning.

"The girls, Kate and Shanie. We've sort of... kidnapped them, haven't we?"

Bulk's eyes widened. "Ooops!"

* * *
"No, you can't call my parents," Katie insisted, hands on hips.

"Why not? You have to let them know where you are." Bulk prodded, "They--"

"No, I don't."

"Why not?"

"They're dead."

"Oh."

"I'm sorry," said Billy quietly.

"Don't be. It's been a while. Shanie and I are on our own and doing just fine, thank you."

"So it appears." Bulk shot a look at Skull, but Skull seemed not to notice. He was staring into space. "Hello? Earth to Skull?" Still no response. "SKULL!"

"What?!" Skull jumped. "What?"

"What in the world were you thinking about?" asked Billy, slightly amused.

"Nothing," blushed Skull. "Nothing at all." He got up and walked out of kitchen, leaving the others to stare after him curiously.

* * *
Billy, Adam, Tommy, and Trini had all squeezed into one cab, and two other cabs carried the rest of the group. They were on their way to visit Rocky's clinic. Zack insisted that Rocky would be free. "He doesn't take patients on Fridays, but he makes appointments and stuff. He'll be there," he'd said. So off they went.

Adam had surprised them all by saying he'd like to come along. "Don't you have a deadline?" Trini had burst out.

"Don't I have a laptop!?" He'd shouted back gleefully. Billy had spent the rest of the morning ogling the laptop. It was exactly like the one he'd tried to build years before. Unfortunately, his prototype had been full of bugs, and his unfortunate mishap with the time hole had prevented any further research.

The laptop was loaded. It had a full color collapsible screen, built-in modem and fax, printer, copier, and scanner... the thing was amazing. Billy was so impressed by it that he followed Adam into the bathroom as he got ready and continued to ask him questions. Adam insisted he only used it for work, but Billy noticed immediately that there was a large game file on the hard drive. "Ok," Adam had chuckled as he shaved. "You caught me."

Billy was still playing with the laptop even now, as they sped toward Rocky. Adam watched him from the front seat, a smile brightening his eyes. Then Adam gasped. "Oh my God!"

Billy jumped. "What? What's wrong?"

Adam looked at him, eyes wide. "Billy, that's your computer!"

Trini covered her mouth with her hand. "Oh my gosh, you're right! I forgot!"

Billy just stared at them, confused. "What?"

Adam gestured toward the computer. "That's your design, Billy. Your research. Your computer."

Billy looked down at the laptop, amazed. "But-- how?"

"It was in your lab, and you... left it to me," Adam explained. "Your will, remember?"

Billy's eyes widened and he colored slightly. "You saw that?"

"Yes. You left everything in your lab to me. Including the plans for that. I went to Apple Computer and they finished your research, worked out the bugs, and... there it is. You singlehandedly put IBM out of business, Billy."

Billy's mouth fell open. "Really?"

Adam nodded, then looked slightly guilty. "I've been getting rich off of you. The royalties and all...."

"You're rich?"

Adam nodded again, and Trini explained. "He keeps it all in the bank. He's got millions."

Adam blushed. "Well... yeah. But half of it's yours, Billy. I'll have to tell them you--"

"You can't," interrupted Tommy, surprising all of them. Up till then he'd been eerily silent.

"What?" Trini turned to look at him, confused.

"He doesn't exist," explained Tommy. "Billy Cranston is dead."

Billy went white. "What?"

"Your death certificate... in August... after they couldn't...." Trini tried to find a way to break it to him gently, but couldn't. "You're legally dead."

Billy stared down at the laptop. "Oh."

"It's got your name on it," Trini pointed out proudly, trying to change the subject. "See?" She pointed at what looked like the familiar Apple symbol with the name Cranston written over it in a font he'd never seen before.

"You're a font, too," said Adam offhandedly.

"Oh." Billy didn't speak again until the cab pulled up outside the clinic.

* * *
"So, Bulk, what should we do?" Adam finished.

Bulk considered. The group were in Rocky's waiting room, doing what one normally does in a waiting room: waiting. Bulk looked at Billy, who was still staring blankly at the laptop. "He's pretty calm for a dead guy," he muttered to himself.

"There's no way we can have his death certificate revoked," Skull said. "He's too young."

"That's true!" Katie considered. "You should be in your thirties, Billy!"

"Hey, that's right!" Skull said, looking disapprovingly at Trini, who had her arm around Billy. "You're breaking the law, you know. Consorting with a minor."

Trini stuck her tongue out at him.

"Dr. DeSantos will see you now," said the receptionist, smiling at them.

They stood, Trini still holding Billy's arm protectively.

"Billy, put down that computer!" ordered Katie fiercely. "Rocky's waiting!"

"I hope he has M&M's," said Shanie hopefully.

"You don't need any more sugar," said Skull wearily.

The receptionist led them into a large office. "Dr. DeSantos, your visitors are here," she said.

The trim, goateed man at the desk looked up and smiled broadly. "Hi!"

Adam stepped forward. "Hey, Monkey-boy! How are you?"

Rocky stood. "What are you doing here, Frog-face? I thought you were bouncing off padded walls!"

Adam laughed. "Ha, ha. Verrry funny. You know I got out years ago. Besides, I wasn't bouncing off the walls when I was there anyway. Guess what?"

"What?" Rocky approached him and gave him a big hug. "And who are all these people? Did someone have kids without telling me? Zack! Trini! Tommy? Is that Bulk and Skull? What's going on here, a convention?"

"Whoa, slow down!" laughed Trini, joining in the hug. "We have news."

"What news?" Rocky was still catching up on hugs while Bulk stood directly in front of Billy. There was no way Rocky would see him until it was time.

"Well," began Zack, "We'll start with introductions. Yes, that's Bulk and Skull. No, none of us had kids without telling you. This is Katie and Shanie. They're friends of Billy's."

Rocky crinkled his brow. "Billy who?"

"You know, Billy." Trini tried to hide her smile.

"No, I don't. The only Billy I know... wouldn't have friends that young."

Bulk nudged Billy. "Now," he whispered.

Billy shyly stepped forward. "Yes, I would."

Rocky screamed.

* * *
"So let me get this straight," Rocky was saying. "You fell through a time hole, landed in a park, stayed at Katie house, met Bulk and Skull, went to see Zack, then Trini, then Tommy and Jason, who stayed behind to take care of the school, then Adam who nearly had another breakdown, and then me?"

"Exactly," nodded Tommy.

"Cool, huh?" said Zack.

"Sure." Rocky was still lying flat on his back, staring up at the ceiling. He hadn't moved since Bulk had revived him. He was still in shock. He'd never fainted before.

"Are you okay?" asked Billy, concerned. Rocky's reaction had been the most... interesting, by far.

"Sure," Rocky said again, his voice far away.

Trini shot Billy a look. "I think we broke his brain," she said.

Rocky laughed at this. "That's a good one, Trini!"

"I guess not," Adam put in, helping Rocky sit up.

Shanie was suddenly right in his face. "Did it hurt when you fell down, Mister? Do you have any M&M's?"

Rocky blinked. "Uh... no to both questions."

Shanie looked disappointed. "Oh."

"What made you decide to become a doctor, Rocky?" Billy asked suddenly. "You told me you were going to be a construction worker or something."

Rocky laughed. "I did say that, didn't I? I never really knew what I wanted to do until my sophomore year in college. A close friend of mine, Leslie, she was hurt really badly in a car accident. At first they said she wouldn't live. When she proved them wrong on that point, they said she'd never walk again. She didn't want to believe that, so she went to a physical therapist in the area. Before the accident, we used to go on these long walks through the woods, and I thought we'd never do that again. But guess what? We go walking every morning now. When I saw how far she'd come, I knew that I wanted to be in medicine."

"Prodigious. But I thought you hated math and science?"

"I did. Well, chemistry and stuff, anyway." Rocky frowned. "It always made me feel really stupid when I didn't understand stuff in class. Biology, though, that I could handle. I remember the first time I studied anatomy in elementary school. I almost got hit by a car on my way home because I was so busy staring at my hand. I could see the veins and tendons, the joints, and I knew what they were! It was great."

"So why didn't you pursue it in high school?" asked Katie. "If you loved it so much?"

Rocky shrugged, blushing a little. "I felt so out of place in science classes. People like... well, like you, Billy... you would understand everything right away, but I had to think about it. People used to make fun of me because it took me so long to get the point."

"I never would have--" Billy felt a flash of pain behind his eyes.

"Not you, Billy. You never made me feel stupid." He paused. "Intentionally."

"I'm sorry, Rocky," said Tommy quietly. "I know I poked fun at you sometimes."

"It was all in fun, I know. It just.... built up, that's all." He brightened. "But in college I found out that there are lots of people like me. We used to study together, and make fun of the brains. No offense, Billy."

"None taken. I--" Billy stopped suddenly and winced, his hand flying to his head.

Rocky was immediately on the alert. "Billy, what's wrong?"

"I... my head really--" He gasped and fell to his knees. He felt someone grab him from behind and Shanie's startled shriek. Then the floor rose up to meet him.

* * *
Rocky was in full doctor mode, his stethoscope at the ready. Billy lay curled up on the table in a hospital gown, his skin cold and white. He moaned slightly.

"What's wrong with him?" Trini was holding Billy's hand, her eyes wide and frightened.

"Not sure yet," answered Rocky curtly. "He's a healer, then?"

"What?" Trini looked confused.

"Yes," answered Bulk from the doorway where the rest of the group waited. "The effects are probably just developing."

Rocky nodded. "I used to wonder why he'd always seem to--" he stopped, as if realizing what he was about to say. "Um... His heart's going a mile a minute..." He took Billy's wrist and counted his pulse. "And his skin's cold," he added as an afterthought. "I would recommend a trip to the hospital, but..."

"There has to be something you can do, Rocky!" Trini was starting to cry. "We've only just got him back, we can't lose him again!"

Rocky looked up, his eyes gentle. "I won't let that happen, Trini," he assured her. He looked down at Billy. "Billy, can you hear me?"

Billy nodded slightly, his face twisted into an expression of pain. "It hurts so much...."

Rocky gently rolled him over onto his back. "I know. Don't worry, Billy, you're going to be fine." He turned to Trini. "Open that third drawer there and hand me the tray. There's only one tray in there, you'll know it when you see it."

Trini obeyed and, finding the tray instantly, handed it to Rocky.

"I'm going to give you an injection, okay, Billy? In your arm. It won't hurt much." He sterilized a spot on Billy's upper arm and deftly filled a syringe with a clear liquid. "You ready?"

No response. Rocky took this as the go-ahead and did the deed. In seconds, it was over. "There," he said, quickly bandaging the spot.

"What will that do?" Skull eyed Billy, who seemed to be relaxing slightly.

"I just gave him a small dose of the chemical that caused the gene mutation in the first place."

"What? Why?" Katie stepped forward, looking alarmed.

"There is a chemical the body produces during the healing process," Rocky explained patiently. "For healers, this chemical is even more potent. The healer must develop his abilities slowly in order to build up an immunity to this chemical."

"An immunity?" Katie was starting to get worried.

"In large doses, this chemical is toxic, and can be lethal. Billy had a large amount of it in his bloodstream, and he has apparently not developed an immunity yet. He used the gene too much, too soon. By injecting the mutagen, I'm allowing his body to counteract the affects of the toxin." He paused, looking down at Billy. "I assume the healing process after his fall in the park is the cause of the overuse."

"Probably." Katie stared at Billy. _Am I going to be next?_

Shanie suddenly grabbed her arm tearfully. "Katie's a healer, too. Is she gonna get sick?"

Skull gasped and stared at Katie. "You're a healer?"

Katie looked down at Shanie and was unable to be angry with her. She was actually rather flattered. "Yes," she answered quietly.

Rocky knelt down in front of her and took her arms gently. "I need to take some blood," he said seriously. "I doubt anything is wrong, but I want to be sure before we have any more emergencies."

Katie winced. She hated needles.

* * *
"I hate waiting," muttered Skull, fidgeting nervously.

"Me too," agreed Shanie from next to him.

"I'm sure Billy will be fine," said Trini hopefully. "Rocky knows what he's doing."

Tommy suddenly stood and left the room as they all stared after him curiously. "What's wrong with him?" wondered Katie.

Adam followed him out.

* * *
"Tom? Tommy!" Adam caught up to Tommy, who appeared to be heading rapidly for the elevator. "Where are you going?"

Tommy stopped, his shoulders drooping. "I don't know."

Adam put an arm around him. "Are you all right? You haven't said two words since all of this started."

Tommy shook his head. "Not true. I've said at least ten."

Adam laughed. "Come on, what's wrong?"

Tommy sighed and looked toward the elevators. "Can we go somewhere else? I don't want to...."

"Sure," Adam led Tommy to the elevators. "Let's take a walk."

Tommy was silent on the elevator, staring at the descending numbers on the indicator above them. When the doors opened, Adam practically had to coax him out.

They walked silently, side by side, for a long while without speaking. Tommy's eyes were cast downward, and Adam was sure he could see tears trickling down his cheeks. "Tommy," he said gently, "Talk to me. You're not doing yourself any good by keeping it inside." No response. "I kept my problems inside for years and you know what happened to me. Coo-coo, anybody home!" That provoked a small smile from Tommy, and Adam pounced. "I saw that! Come on, talk!"

Tommy sighed and turned to him. "Adam, I just don't know what to feel anymore. For years I thought he was dead and gone. I failed him. All of you."

Adam shook his head sadly. "You didn't fail anybody, Tommy. You couldn't have stopped what happened even if you'd understood it at the time."

Tommy looked back down at the sidewalk. "I tried to tell myself that. Almost every day I want over it again and again in my head. I wish I could believe it."

"Tommy, you shouldn't think like this. We were a team. You were the leader, yes, in that we all looked up to you and respected you, but we lost Billy as a team. It was no more your fault that it was mine, or Kimberly's."

Tommy took a deep breath at the mention of her name. "Kimberly. I think about her all the time too. God, Adam, look at us! We used to be the Power Rangers, but now we're a nut and a drunk, and... and I'm a nervous wreck."

"And we're also a clothing designer, a doctor and couple of teachers... Tommy, you have somehow managed to overlook everything that is good about this situation."

Tommy whirled around to face him, his face stormy. "I just can't do it. I can't be happy knowing--"

"Knowing what? Tom, we finally have the chance to tell him all the things we wanted to say back then! We finally have the chance to be a group again, and be together. Why do you insist on living in the past?"

Tommy gaped at him, unaccustomed to hearing Adam speak so forcefully. "Maybe you should have been the leader," he managed, with a slight smile. "You can be pretty strong-willed when you want to be."

Adam placed a hand on his shoulder. "Answer the question, Tom."

Tommy hung his head again and sighed. "I can't."

* * *
"We're back," came a voice from the doorway. The group turned as Adam walked in, followed by a red-eyed Tommy.

"Are you okay?" asked Katie, concerned.

Tommy nodded and took a seat next to her. "I'll be okay. We had a talk."

"We did not. I talked and you listened," corrected Adam. Katie noticed that his eyes were a little red as well.

"Okay," nodded Tommy. "He's right. But either way, I'm okay."

"Or he will be, anyway." Adam smiled toward Tommy and sat down next to Skull, who was holding a restless Shanie in his lap. "You look beat," he said, nodding toward the child.

"I am. She wore me out." Skull sighed.

Shanie twisted around to look at him. "You can take a nap and then we'll play some more, okay?" She jumped down from his lap and ran to Katie. "Play house with me!"

"No way," answered Katie firmly. "I can't think about that now."

"I'll play," said Tommy, kneeling down before her. "What do you want me to do?"

Shanie thought about it for a second, then grabbed a lock of his long hair, stroking it. "You can be my daughter and I'll brush your hair."

Zack laughed loudly and Tommy made a face. "Can't I be the son instead?"

"Well..." Shanie sounded reluctant.

"I'll still let you brush my hair."

"Okay, you can be the son," she agreed, and promptly stepped back, putting her hands on her hips. "Son, how many times have I told you to GET A HAIRCUT?!"

Skull smiled, too tired to laugh out loud. "She's amazing isn't she?" he said to no one in particular.

Bulk noticed an unfamiliar tone in his voice and looked at him, puzzled. "Gene, are you okay?"

Skull turned to look at him, his eyes moist. "I've never felt this way about anybody before," he revealed in a voice only Bulk could hear. "She's so little and helpless... and happy. When she smiles at me I just..." he smiled again wistfully. "I wish she was mine. I wish I'd found the right woman and gotten married. Now its too late. I'll never have... I'll never have a kid like her."

Bulk gaped at him. "It's not too late! You can still have kids! And you've got time with her--"

"I know. I just... I just regret... I don't know." He looked over to Shanie again and sighed. "I wish...." His voice trailed off and he stared down at his hands. "When Katie said they were orphans, I started to think. What if... what if I could adopt them?" Bulk gasped and Skull quickly qualified the statement. "I know Katie's too old, but I could take care of Shanie. Katie could go off on her own, to school, or whatever she wants, and I could put Shanie through school and raise her--"

"Gene, do you realize what you're saying? You see how tired you are now? Imagine dealing with her all day, every day!"

Skull smiled. "I have. And I couldn't imagine a greater happiness."

They were interrupted as Rocky came out into the room, grinning. "Our boy is back!" he said, motioning to the back room. "He's awake and asking for you all."

In less than a second, everyone was up and through the door. Billy was sitting up on the table, smiling. "Hi," he said brightly.

Trini rushed up and hugged him, the others following. "Billy! You look great!"

"I feel great. I'm going to come to Rocky with all my medical needs," he joked good-naturedly.

Rocky laughed. "Hopefully you won't have too many of them. I prescribed a pill, the same chemical as that injection I gave him, and after about a month of taking it he should be good to go. He will, of course, still need those two examinations every year." He glanced to Katie. "You, too, though you're perfectly fine now."

Katie nodded. "I know. Thank you."

"Are you certified to examine healers?" Bulk asked suddenly.

Rocky nodded. "Yup. I have more certifications than any other doctor in California."

Billy gaped at him. "How in the world did you manage that?"

"Years and years of boring science classes and a few good tutors," Rocky answered jokingly. "Actually I took a few night courses once I started my practice. It happened gradually."

"Speaking of things happening gradually," Katie reminded them, "we still have people to see, don't we?"

Billy nodded. "Aisha. And Kim."

"Will you come with us, Dr. Rocky?" asked Shanie hopefully.

Rocky shook his head sadly. "I can't. I've got several appointments these next few days. I want to...."

Billy smiled a little. "It's okay, Rocky. We can stay for a while today, can't we? And we'll keep in touch. You can be my doctor."

"Coolness."

Katie had to smile at the sight of a certified medical doctor saying something like 'coolness.' This guy was incredible.

"But you have to promise me you'll take it easy, Billy," Rocky warned. "You can't keep overtaxing your healing powers like this, and you can't get too excited. You'll only make yourself sick again."

Billy nodded. "Understood. I'll take it slow."

"Wait, why didn't we know he was a healer before?" asked Adam. "You know, back in high school?"

"The ability develops slowly," Rocky explained. "And we didn't even know about this stuff back then. He was probably just developing it when... everything happened."

Trini kissed Rocky on the cheek, and he blushed. "You're incredible, Rocky," she said giddily.

"I definitely agree" said Zack, "But don't expect me to kiss you."

* * *
Billy lounged on the big red couch in Rocky's office, watching his friends interact. They were the same people he had always known, yet they were different. They had changed, and he had not. He suddenly felt very left out.

He smiled a little as Rocky told a silly joke about a wolf and a pig, but his heart wasn't in it. Trini noticed his expression and sat down next to him. "What's the matter, sweetie?"

He leaned his head on her shoulder, grateful for her touch. "It's nothing, Trini. Don't worry about me." He looked up and saw the others, especially Rocky, watching him carefully. He blushed a little and buried his face in Trini's embrace. "I'll be fine."

Someone sat down on his other side. "Come on, Billy, talk!" insisted Katie. "You know what happens when you don't!"

Adam began to make coo-coo noises, and Billy managed a small laugh. When he lifted his face to them, they saw with mild shock that he was crying. "Billy..." Adam was immediately there, holding his hands gently. Katie put an arm around him, and he blushed again under all the attention.

"I'm fine, really," he said, his voice cracking. "I just... need time, that's all." Rocky brought over a box of tissues. "Thanks." He half heartedly wiped his eyes.

"It's finally caught up to you, I guess," volunteered Tommy quietly. "All of these changes."

"You're all old!" Billy burst out. "It's not supposed to be like this! I don't fit in here, I don't belong here... in this world."

"This is your world," Zack began, but he was interrupted rather forcefully.

"No, it's not. My world passed away eighteen years ago in that explosion. I don't know where I am anymore."

Tommy approached and knelt down before him, next to Adam. "You're where you belong," he said. "You're with us, your friends. We're finally together again, and we thought that would never happen. You can't hold on to the past, Billy, without destroying your future. Adam taught me that."

Tommy looked fondly to Adam, whose eyes crinkled up as he smiled. "Tommy's right," he told Billy. "I learned the hard way. You don't have to. Accept where you are. You can still be happy."

Billy looked around at the group gathered around him. They were all concerned, but they were smiling. They were the same smiles he had always known, and he felt a familiar warmth in his chest when he looked into their eyes. "It's true," he whispered, grasping Adam's hands tightly. "You haven't changed, not really. You're still... you're still you."

Katie tactfully stood to make room for Zack, Bulk, and Skull, who had been hanging back. She stood watching them, Shanie quietly waiting at her feet. Part of her wanted to join them, but she felt that she didn't belong there. This was Billy's time.

Skull turned and saw them standing there. "Come on," he said, waving them over. "We can't have a group hug without you guys."

Katie shook her head, holding Shanie back. "We don't belong," she said. "You need your time with him now."

Skull stood and gathered her into a hug. "You can belong. If you want to."

Katie, shocked at the sudden show of affection, pulled back reflexively. But just as suddenly she felt herself melting into his arms, burying her face into his chest as a sob escaped her. She could feel Shanie's small arms encircling her leg, and smelled the scent of Tommy's cologne as he joined them. Soon they were all locked together, some of them crying, all of them smiling. "It's a Kodak moment," she heard Rocky say from somewhere in the middle of the hug. She started to laugh.

* * *
"You'll have to excuse the mess," Rocky warned them as he unlocked the door to his apartment. "I wasn't exactly expecting guests."

He walked in before them, then stopped so suddenly that Skull slammed into his back. "Hey!" Skull stumbled backwards. "What gives?"

Billy peered over Rocky's shoulder and his mouth dropped open. "Oh!" he breathed.

The apartment was dark except for a small, elegantly set table in the middle of the living room, lit with two burnt-down candles. A woman stood there beside the table, her face set in an expression somewhere between anger and fear. "Uh-oh," Rocky muttered.

The woman stepped forward, the candle light illuminating her soft, delicate features. "I see you've brought company," she said, her voice barely audible.

Rocky stepped forward. "Leslie, I can explain."

"Don't bother," she said tiredly, moving back into the shadows. "This was obviously a mistake. Entertain your guests. I'll clean this up."

"Wait," shouted Katie, surprising everyone, including herself. "Don't be mad at Rocky. It wasn't his fault."

Leslie stopped and stared at her blankly. "No, of course it wasn't. I didn't say it was."

"We came by to see him unannounced," explained Zack apologetically.

"And I came back from the dead," added Billy. "Not today, but a few days ago. And we wanted to tell him."

"Came back from the dead?" Leslie repeated slowly.

"Leslie, meet Billy," said Rocky sheepishly.

She gaped. "The Billy?"

Rocky nodded. "Yes."

"You've heard of me?"

Leslie stepped up to the door and flicked on the light switch, temporarily blinding them. "You're Billy? But how--?"

"It's a long story," said Bulk. "And I'd love to tell it to you but I think you and Rocky have a little something to discuss, don't you?"

Leslie stared around at all of them, and slowly nodded. "Yes, we do." She turned to Rocky. "I guess I should say this now. In front of witnesses."

Rocky gulped. "Witnesses?"

"He's in trouble now," whispered Zack a little too loudly. Bulk poked him in the side and he was quiet.

Leslie stepped up to him and took his hand. "Rocky, we've been friends for fifteen years now, and more than friends for five. You mean a lot to me, and I hope you feel the same way."

"I do," he whispered, seemingly unaware of his friends' presence.

"I hope that's not the last time I hear you say that."

Katie gasped and her hand flew to her mouth.

"Leslie..." Rocky breathed, "I--"

"Don't," she said, putting a finger to his lips. "Let me say it." He was silent, waiting. "Rockwell Aaron DeSantos, will you marry me?"

Rocky was quiet for a moment, his eyes wide and moist. "I... of course I will."

There was a moment of choked silence. Then Shanie began to clap. Tommy joined her, and soon everyone was clapping and cheering, watching as the two embraced passionately. "Can I be the best man?" Adam called loudly.

"No, me!" argued Billy. "I've been dead the longest!"

"Hey," said Skull suddenly, "Hey!"

Everyone froze. "What?" said Rocky fearfully.

"Oh, nothing. I mean, I wanted to... ask... something."

"What?" Leslie was obviously confused by the whole situation.

Skull blushed. "Well, it's just that... as long as we're making proposals...."

"Say it," urged Bulk, knowing what was coming.

Skull took a deep breath. "Well, as most of you know, I've been spending a lot of time with little Shanie here." Shanie looked up at him, surprised. "And I've been happier these past few days than I have been in a long time."

"Because of me?" Shanie's voice was full of awe.

"Yes," Skull said, smiling down at her. Then he looked to Katie. "And you, too. When you said you were... orphans... something... happened. I wanted to... I mean, I have to ask you...." his voice trailed off and he struggled for words. "Katie, Shanie... will you let me be your father?"

Rocky and Leslie watched and waited, still in one another's arms. The rest still stood in a group by the door, overwhelmed by the events of the past few moments. Katie and Shanie were silent, staring up at Skull. He merely waited.

"You... you want to... adopt us? Both of us?" Katie's voice was high-pitched, choked.

He nodded, and knelt down to face Shanie. "I really like being with you, and I think you like being with me."

Shanie grabbed him in a big hug. "I don't care what Katie says. I want you to be my Daddy, Skull."

Skull gasped and tears began to flow from his eyes. He hugged her back, hardly daring to breathe. "Katie," he said through his tears, "Will you have me?"

Katie stared at him, her mind whirling. She had only just met him, and her parents were dead barely two years. So why did this seem so right? She nodded and spoke, her voice hoarse with unshed tears. "Yes," she said. "I will."

* * *
Shanie was asleep, curled up in Skull's lap. Katie dozed next to him, her head rolling onto his shoulder. He looked overwhelmed, and hadn't spoken since Katie's emotional acceptance. Bulk watched them proudly, mentally planning for the drawing up of the papers. Rocky, with Leslie lying comfortably in his arms, sat on the couch next to Billy and Trini. Zack, Tommy, and Adam were raiding the fridge. There was an air of contentment in the group, a peace that had not existed in any of them for a long time.

Trini broke the silence. "I guess we'll be leaving in the morning. Does Aisha work on Saturdays?"

"No," Rocky shook his head. "The clinic is open, but she's off. Thursdays and Saturdays, I think."

"That's convenient," remarked Billy sleepily. "I can't wait to see her."

Trini giggled. "She's gonna totally freak out."

Rocky sighed mournfully. "I wish I could go."

"Why can't you?" insisted Leslie. "You can reschedule a few people can't you?"

"You of all people know how important my job is," he admonished her. "Where would you be if Mark had taken off whenever he wanted to?"

She considered. "I'd still be here. I'd just limp."

Rocky rolled his eyes. "Be serious."

"I am serious," she said sternly. "You're entitled to get sick just like everyone else."

"Sick?"

"You really should take better care of yourself, Rocky. This flu will keep you off your feet for at least a week."

Billy snickered and waited for Rocky's response.

"Um... yeah. This flu sure is brutal. I guess I'll have to call Melanie tomorrow morning and let her know how sick I am."

"Don't be silly, you can barely talk. I'll call."

"Right. Should I call for you?"

"You are so bad," came Zack's voice from the kitchen doorway.

Rocky looked up guiltily. "What, like you've never done it?"

Zack laughed. "Never. Well, not since college, anyway."

Shanie stirred in Skull's lap and he shifted his grip on her. "It'll be nice to have you with us," he said softly.

They all looked at him, surprised. "I thought you weren't talking?" said Adam as he stepped out from behind Zack.

"I was just thinking," smiled Skull. "This all happened so fast."

"I know," agreed Billy, yawning. "I'm still overwhelmed."

"Hey," said Tommy suddenly. "I've got an idea!"

"What?" Zack moved aside to let him out of the kitchen.

"Well, we were talking about Billy before. You know, his... death, and all."

"So?" Rocky was looking very confused.

"Well," Tommy seemed to hesitate. "If Skull can adopt Katie and Shanie, maybe someone could adopt Billy, too. You know, just to... for legal purposes."

Bulk nodded slowly. "That's true. If a child is born... on the streets... he might not have a social security number of anything... so legally he wouldn't exist. If someone adopted Billy--"

"We could get around this!" Trini turned to Skull. "What do you think?"

Skull looked at Billy incredulously. "You want me to adopt him too?"

Billy stared back at him. "I don't believe this."

"He's almost eighteen anyway," considered Adam. "It would just be to, you know, bring him back to life. Sort of."

"You wouldn't have to take care of him," nodded Leslie, catching on. "He's got Trini for that," she added mischievously.

"But... but then Skull would be my... father." Billy bit his lip. "That's just... weird."

Skull was quiet again. "Well, it would only be for legal reasons, I guess. I'd still be the same guy...."

"You'd actually do it?" Billy's mouth fell open. "You'd adopt me?"

"I guess so. I don't know."

Bulk smiled at his buddy. "Wow, Gene, three kids at once! You son of a gun!"

* * *
"Well, guys, be sure to keep in touch," Zack started to step back into the taxi.

"Are you sure you have to go?" Billy felt his throat constrict painfully.

"Fraid so, buddy. I've already been gone too long. Without me, the whole place falls apart."

"You'll see him again," offered Katie, placing a hand on Billy's shoulder.

He nodded. "I know."

Zack ran to him and gave him a big hug. "Stop by the studio anytime. We'll do lunch, okay?"

"Right." Billy watched sadly as the cab carried Zack away.

Bulk put an arm around his shoulders and guided him up the walk toward the front door of Aisha's house.

"Are you sure this is late enough?" worried Rocky nervously. "Aisha likes to sleep in on her days off."

"I'm sure she won't mind," Katie pointed out. "Remember why we're here."

"Shhh." Tommy rang the doorbell and then knocked three times loudly. "Our secret knock," he explained.

"You have a secret knock?" The door opened before Tommy could answer Billy's question.

"Hi, Tom," smiled Aisha. "What are you doing here?"

"We're engaged!" burst out Rocky, before he could stop himself.

Aisha squealed and grabbed both him and Leslie in a big hug. "Oh, I am so happy for you two! But you brought all of these people with you...."

Tommy gave her a hug. "Well, they were there, we were there...." he said vaguely.

Aisha looked around at the group. "Is that Bulk and Skull?"

"In the flesh," answered Bulk. "And this is Katie and her little sister Shanie."

Shanie waved. "Hi!"

"Hello." Aisha noticed an extra sneaker behind Bulk. "And who's that?"

Billy didn't move. "Guess," he said mischievously.

Aisha faltered. "Um... Say that again?"

"I said, guess."

"I know that voice...." Aisha approached slowly. "Or I think I do, but--"

"But what?" Billy stepped out to meet her.

Aisha gasped and began jumping up and down, screaming and clapping her hands. "OhmygodOhmygodOhmygodOhmygod!"

Billy laughed and grabbed her hands, stopping her movement. "It's good to see you, too. You look great!"

It was true. Her long hair was carefully braided, and it cascaded down her back in a large ponytail. Her eyes sparkled, and her skin fairly glowed. "Oh my God! I feel great," she told them. "Especially now. Billy, how in the world.... You look so young!"

"He is young," supplied Bulk dryly. "Seventeen, to be exact."

"But... Seventeen?" She thought for a moment, then her brown eyes lit up with understanding. "A time hole?"

Billy nodded. "Precisely."

Aisha grabbed him in a big hug and pulled him inside the house. "Ohmygod, Billy Cranston, I swear, you are full of surprises!" The group followed them inside, and Katie took it upon herself to inform Aisha of the latest change.

"Actually, his name is Billy Skullovitch now."

Aisha stopped short and stared at Skull. "What?"

Skull blushed, much to the amusement of his friends. "Um... I'm going to adopt him. And Katie and Shanie. Just because... you know...."

"Billy Cranston is legally dead," finished Billy, sounding a little pained.

"Oh, Billy," Aisha took his hand gently. "Are you okay?"

He nodded, and fell gratefully into her offered arms. "You're a good hugger," he sniffled tearfully into her shoulder.

She chuckled a little and ran her hand through his hair. "You looked like you needed it."

Trini put her hands on her hips mock-defiantly. "Excuse me? Are you saying I'm not enough woman for him?"

Aisha let out an explosive laugh, pushing Billy toward her. "Well, this is new! Trini, you should be ashamed of yourself. He's just a kid!"

"Yeah, but he's mine!" laughed Trini, taking over the hugging duties.

Aisha led them all into the living room, which was decorated mostly in gold and yellow tones. Billy sank down into the couch and closed his eyes, and Rocky was there next to him, instantly alert. "You okay?"

Billy opened his eyes. "Yeah, I'm just tired. I'll rest awhile, okay?" He closed his eyes again, and Rocky took his pulse, just to be sure.

Aisha shook her head. "I still can't get used to the idea of you being a doctor, Rocky."

Adam gave her a hello hug. "Me neither. He's really good, too."

"Of course," retorted Rocky, satisfied that Billy was all right. "What did you expect?"

They all took seats, Trini, Billy, and Katie on the couch, and the others in the various chairs and beanbags around the room. Shanie, Skull, Adam, and Tommy settled for the floor.

"So Bulk, what's been up with you?" asked Aisha curiously. "I haven't seen you since graduation."

He shrugged. "A few years of therapy, you know. It's apparently common in this group." He shot a sidelong look at Adam, who snickered a little. "I realized I was going nowhere fast and decided to do something about it. You are now looking at Lieutenant Farkus Bulkmeier of the Angel Grove Police Force. Over there is my Partner in Kryme, as it were, Sergeant Eugene Skullovitch."

"Way to go, Skull!" Aisha gave him the thumbs up and winked. Skull just blushed and looked down at the floor, much to Katie's amusement.

Adam noticed, too. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he muttered, still staring at the floor.

"I guess he's still in shock about this whole adoption thing," said Tommy. "It was all pretty fast."

"Is it official yet?"

"No," Bulk answered, "But we hope to do it soon. Adam faxed the station for me and we're waiting for an answer."

From the couch, Billy opened his eyes and spoke. "On my computer," he said, smiling. "I have a computer."

Aisha laughed. "I know. I still can't get over the fact that you're here! I'm in shock!" She stood and went to hug him again, though gently this time. "I missed you!"

"I wish I could say I missed you too," responded Billy, "but it's only been a few days to me."

Aisha went to Skull next. "And now you're adopting him? That is so sweet!" She kissed him on the cheek, and he jumped a little.

"Uh... thanks."

"Where did you find these two?"

"They found me," answered Billy, who was starting to feel a little better. He sat up and stretched. "When I fell out of the sky, I almost landed on them. Katie nursed me back to health."

"What about me?" demanded Shanie. "I helped!"

"And Shanie, too, of course."

"You're going to be my brother," she said proudly. "I always wanted a brother."

Billy looked surprised. "Oh, yeah. I forgot about that."

"Skull, how in the world are you going to handle three kids," laughed Aisha, sitting cross-legged next to him. Adam took the opportunity to steal her seat in the big armchair.

"Well," Skull stammered, "I... I mean,"

"What he means to say," Katie clarified, "Is that Billy and I are hardly kids, I mean, I'm legally an adult already. And Shanie's not too hard to handle as long as she stays away from sugar. Besides, he won't have to do it alone if I have anything to do with it."

Skull looked at her, mortified. "What?"

"I'm going to find you a girlfriend," she revealed determinedly. "And I already have someone in mind." She looked to Aisha pointedly.

Rocky snorted a laugh into his hand as Skull turned a deep shade of purple. Billy's eyes widened. "I thought I was the only one who blushed like that!"

"Apparently not," remarked Bulk, trying hard not to laugh at his buddy's expense.

"He's really sweet," Katie continued. "Not at all like he used to be. Or what I've heard he used to be, you know. I'm not making any sense am I? The point is, he's a really cool guy, he's great with Shanie, and she doesn't trust just anybody, you know. And I think he likes you--"

"Katie!" Skull grabbed her arm, wild-eyed. "Shut up!"

This time, Rocky couldn't contain himself, and let out a loud snorting laugh. Leslie started to giggle, sounding vaguely like a donkey, and soon everyone (except Skull, Katie, and Aisha) was laughing hysterically.

Aisha smiled a little and looked down at the floor. Skull was still blushing furiously, looking more than a bit peeved. "Well," she managed, "We'll see."

"This is too weird," Billy moaned. "I can't take much more of this."

Rocky smiled a little. "He's right, actually. I think he needs a break from all this. Maybe we should end this. There's plenty of time for--"

"No!" Billy sat straight up. "I want to see Kim. I have to."

There was a sudden silence. "Um...." Leslie had heard all about Kimberly, and was almost certain that seeing her would be hazardous to the poor boy's health. "Billy, maybe you should wait on that. You need to rest--"

"No. Kimberly is one of my best and oldest friends and I have to see her."

Rocky tried another tactic. "I know you want to see her, Billy, but it's a bit of a trip and it'll be draining. Maybe if you just wait a week or so?" Billy shook his head but Rocky continued quickly. "We can call her. You can talk to her on the phone?"

"Please, Rocky." Billy looked around at all of his friends. "I know you've been putting off taking me to her," he said to Bulk. "And I guess I appreciate your concern. But you have to understand. I need to see her."

Trini put her hands on his shoulders firmly and faced him. "Billy, you heard what happened to her, didn't you?" He nodded. "She's not the same person. It might upset you."

"Is she that bad?" Tears began to well up in his eyes.

"She's a lot better," answered Tommy quickly. "Better than she was. She's improving every day."

"It's an ongoing battle," nodded Leslie.

"It's just that... you haven't seen her--" Aisha's eyes were sympathetic, and Billy felt a sudden flash of anger.

"I couldn't possibly be more upset than I already am, and the more you try to convince me not to see her, the more upset I get! She couldn't possibly be as bad as you're making her out to be, and if she is, I want to be there for her--" He broke off suddenly, wincing and putting a hand to his head.

Rocky looked to the group with sudden alarm, and Trini gathered Billy into her arms. "All right, Billy, all right. We'll go."

* * *
Billy sat silently in the rented van, sandwiched between Trini and Adam. He had been staring at his hands for the whole ride so far, and Rocky watched him nervously from the front seat. Bulk glanced back at him periodically through the rear view mirror, though Leslie chided him to keep his eyes on the road.

Skull, Aisha, and Shanie had the backseat, and Shanie was constantly waving out the back windshield at the group behind them. Tommy would smile at her without lifting his hands from the wheel, and Katie would make faces at her from next to him.

Skull had his attention divided between Shanie, who refused to stay buckled in, and Billy, who worried him more and more every minute. "Uh, Billy," he said finally, unable to stand his silence anymore, "You okay?"

Billy looked back at him and smiled slightly. "Yeah, just thinking."

Rocky relaxed a bit. "I thought you were freaking out on us, Billy."

"I am, kinda. I'll be all right."

"Did you take your pill this morning?"

Billy nodded, but Adam jumped slightly. "Ooops!" He started rummaging in his backpack, much to everyone's amusement.

"Yeah, we can't have two nuts running around," Trini giggled. "I couldn't handle it."

"Oh, you could handle me," Adam kidded her. "I'll just get really melancholy and recite Shakespeare soliloquies. And then I'll start calling everyone Mommy."

Billy didn't respond; he just turned to stare out the window. "Does Kim know we're coming?" he asked seriously.

"I called and told her I was bringing over some old friends," answered Trini gently. "Of course, I didn't tell her about you over the phone."

"Of course." Billy's voice was far away, and he sighed. "I'm scared."

Adam put an arm around him. "Don't be. We didn't mean to scare you. She's okay, really."

"She works in a small clothing shop," Aisha told him.

"She's designed a few outfits for them, too," Trini added proudly. "I have a few outfits from the Hart collection myself."

"The Hart Collection?"

"Amazing isn't it?" Aisha was beaming. "She's really getting somewhere!"

Billy stared out the window, his eyes going dull and blank. Trini looked to Rocky, who was looking very nervous. "Take it easy, Billy," he warned quietly. "Don't make yourself sick, okay?"

Billy didn't respond. Trini drew him close to her and prayed that he would be all right.

* * *
"Are you ready, Billy?" Katie squeezed his shoulder as they approached the door to Kimberly's.

He nodded, but she noticed that he was pale and shaking. Rocky apparently noticed too, because he was watching Billy like a hawk. Trini motioned for the others to step back, and she knocked softly on the door. "Kim? We're here!"

There was a familiar squeal from inside, and Billy's heart jumped. "Trini, you're early!" Kim called, and they could hear her unlocking the door. "Hi!" The door opened slowly and a woman in a pink satin house dress shuffled out, grabbing Trini in a hug. She had grayish hair, pulled back into a large bun at the nape of her neck. She was painfully thin, her hands shook, and it looked like it might even hurt her to move. She looked much closer to fifty than thirty-five.

Billy's breath caught in his throat, and Rocky quickly grabbed his shoulder. "Relax," he hissed into Billy's ear. "This is not the time for you to get sick!"

Billy concentrated on breathing and swallowed hard to keep from crying.

"Kim, you lost weight!" Trini was admonishing her, looking her critically up and down.

"I know," answered Kim. "I've been so busy lately. So who did you bring to see me? What a big group!"

Adam stepped up and hugged her. "We brought quite a few people."

"Adam! I haven't seen you in ages! How's Shawna?"

"We broke up."

"Oh!" Her hand flew to her mouth. "I'm sorry."

"S'okay," answered Adam good-naturedly. "It was a mutual, friendly breakup. It just happened to involve a lot of yelling and crying."

Kimberly laughed and peeked behind him. "Do I see Aisha back there? And Rocky?"

Aisha laughed and hugged her, and Leslie dragged Rocky away from Billy. "We're engaged!" she informed Kimberly gleefully.

Kimberly squealed again and grabbed the both of them in a big hug. "Oh, I am so happy for you! It's about time, you asked her, Rocky!"

"He didn't," Leslie told her. "I asked him."

"It was beautiful," put in Skull, wiping away an imaginary tear.

"Eugene Skullovitch, is that you?" Kimberly gasped. "And Bulk?"

"In the flesh," answered Skull, beaming. "And this is... there are my daughters, Katie and Shanie."

Shanie waved. "Hi, clothes lady!"

Kimberly raised her eyebrows. "You have kids? Since when?"

"Since the other day," Bulk answered, grinning. "But it's not official yet."

"Hi, Kim," said Tommy shyly, without moving forward. "I uh... it's been a while."

Kimberly stepped out of the doorway and hugged him tightly. "Tommy, hi. You look great!"

He stiffened a little at her touch, and then seemed to melt into the hug. "You too, Kim."

"No I don't," she sighed. "But thanks for saying it." She noticed a shadow behind him. "Who's that?" She tried to peer over his shoulder, but Tommy was too tall.

Tommy held her shoulders firmly and looked into her eyes. "I'll tell you but you have to promise not to freak."

"Freak? Why?"

"Just relax, okay? And promise me!"

"Okay, what?" She looked confused, and a little scared.

Tommy slowly moved aside. "Well... we found Billy," he said. "He's alive."

Kimberly and Billy both froze, staring into one another's eyes. Rocky hurried back to Billy's side, ready for anything. Kimberly's mouth opened, but nothing came out of it but an airy squeak. Tommy stood in readiness behind her. She stared for a second, and then pulled a familiar golden locket away from her neck, fingering the chain lovingly. "Billy?" She stepped forward, eyes widening. "Billy? It can't be...."

_My necklace!_ Billy stepped back away from her, his breathing ragged. He tried to remember why she was wearing it, but he couldn't think straight. _Did I give... my will!_ He began to count slowly, trying to control his racing heart. "One, two, three, four, five...."

Kimberly continued forward slowly, her arms rising to meet him, tears beginning to stream down her face. "Billy, please don't run away from me...."

He gasped when he saw the ugly, twisted scars on her tiny wrists. "Kim...." Billy's voice came out as a choked wail, and as he lurched toward her, his knees buckled.

Kimberly was there in an instant, on her knees, holding him close. "Billy..." she was crying, her voice choked. She buried her face in his shoulder, kissing his neck gently. "I thought you were dead! I thought--" her voice broke off and she sobbed with him. Tommy knelt down next to her and rubbed her shoulders, while the others hung back, tears in their eyes.

Pain was crashing through Billy's skull, but he ignored it. "Kimmie, I am so sorry...." She was too thin, and trembling. The pain got worse.

She pulled back slightly and stared into his face. "You're so young...." her voice broke off as she took him in. His eyes were filled with pain, and the dark circles surrounding them made his pale face look even whiter. She finally realized the way Rocky had been hovering over him since they'd arrived. "You're sick, Billy," she breathed, tears beginning anew. "Please don't tell me I'm going to lose you again...."

Rocky pulled Billy away from her gently. "You're not," he said determinedly.

Tommy grabbed Kimberly carried her inside the house, ignoring her protests. Rocky steadied Billy, noting the glassy look in his eyes. "Okay, buddy, we're going to get you inside where you can rest." The others stepped back, concerned. "Billy, can you hear me?" Rocky stared straight into his face. "Can you hear me?" No response. "Damn," he muttered. He let go of Billy for a second and he started to fall over. "Damn," he said again, grabbing him.

"What's wrong?" Trini's dark eyes were filled with fear and dread.

"He'll be okay," Rocky assured her, "He just needs time." He picked Billy up and carried him inside.

* * *
Shanie sighed pointedly, resting her head in her hand. Ever since they'd come to see this clothes lady, everyone was really quiet and sad. Even Skull wasn't playing with her. She sighed again, switching hands. Adults were so weird. They were all just sitting there. She couldn't understand why Trini seemed to be so content holding Billy's head in her lap and stroking his hair, and why the clothes lady just sat on the floor and rested her head on his chest. And if she was so happy to see Billy, why was she crying all the time? And why was Billy so sick? Hadn't Dr. Rocky fixed him?

She realized that no one was going to respond to her sighs, so she got up and started wandering around the house. It was a small house, but she supposed that was okay. Probably the clothes lady lived alone. She inspected the kitchen and noticed with disappointment that there didn't seem to be any junk food around. She tried the dining room next, and found it similarly bland.

She wandered back into the living room. None of them had moved except Mr. Adam. He had gotten up and was looking through the clothes lady's bookshelf. She approached him warily. "Adam?"

He looked down at her and smiled. "Hi, Shanie, I was wondering where you went."

He kept his voice quiet, so Shanie figured she ought to do the same. "I'm bored," she told him. "And hungry."

He glanced over at the other adults, and then gathered her up into his arms. "Yeah, me too," he told her in a whisper. "What say we blow this joint?"

Her eyes widened. "What does that mean?"

He laughed. "Want to go out?"

"Oh! Okay. But what about Billy?"

Adam carried her over to the couch. "Rocky's taking care of him." he said, leaning over him. "He should be okay."

"Is he better?"

"It'll take time," Adam answered. "He's pretty sick."

"What about the clothes lady?" she whispered, pointing.

"You can call me Kim," said the clothes lady suddenly, startling her. "You're Shanie, right?" She lifted her head from Billy's chest and smiled up at Shanie.

"Yes."

"I'll be fine, Shanie," Kim told her. "And so will Billy. You two go have fun."

Trini smiled up at them. "Bring us back something?"

"Sure," Adam answered. "Anyone else want to come?" No one responded, so he shrugged. "Guess it's just you and me, kid," he told Shanie, tickling her.

She giggled. "Do you mind, Skull?"

Skull shook his head. "No, you go, I'm kinda tired."

"Okay." Shanie grinned. "Where should we go?"

Adam shook his head. "I dunno. I figure we'll just wander around a bit and hope we find something?"

"Yay!"

Katie rolled her eyes. "Peas in a pod," she muttered.

* * *
"Can we go to Burger King?" asked Shanie excitedly, straining against her seat belt.

"Sure, if I can find one," answered Adam. "I don't know this area very well."

"Okay. Adam?"

"Yes?"

"Tell me about what happened to you after you thought Billy was dead?"

"I thought the others already told you."

"They did, but you weren't there," she reminded him. "I wanna hear about you!"

Adam sighed and glanced at her. "Yeah. Listen, Shanie, I don't think you'd understand. You're a bit young--"

"I'm not too young to know what it's like when somebody dies," she retorted. "My Mommy and Daddy died when I was six and I cried a whole lot." He didn't respond. "I bet you cried a lot, too, huh?"

"Billy was like a brother to me," he said quietly. "I cried... all the time."

"Was that why you got in trouble?"

"I didn't... get in trouble, exactly. I went nuts. They had to put me away."

"What did you do?"

"Well, first I started laughing uncontrollably, in classes and stuff. And... sometimes I heard voices. In my head, you know? That weren't really there. And then I--" He broke off, glancing at her. "No, you're definitely too young for this."

"What?" she insisted. "What did you do?"

"I... I tried to... kill myself. My dad was a policeman and I stole his gun. I would have done it, too, but he'd emptied the gun. There were no bullets. He found me in my room, and I still had it... up against my head, just pulling the trigger again and again. Of course, you can't shoot yourself with an empty gun...." he laughed a little. "He just grabbed it from me and.... Well, I was in the hospital that night."

Shanie's eyes were wide. "Did you finish school?"

"School had ended about two weeks before," he answered, "So I had finished my finals and everything. Barely. I spent most of the rest of the summer locked up. I was in and out of the hospital for my senior year, but I made up for everything I missed. I went back in right after I graduated."

"But they let you out in August, right?"

"For the memorial, yes. I'm glad they let me out for that. They weren't going to, at first. They thought I was too sick."

"But you weren't?"

"Actually, I was, but I had all of my friends there to support me. They never let me out of their sight. I don't know what I'd have done if... if I'd missed it. Hey, look, isn't that a Burger King across there?"

"Yay! Burger King! I want a Whopper!"

"I don't think you can eat a whole Whopper. Maybe a Whopper Jr."

"I can eat a Whopper, and fries!" she argued.

"We'll see," said Adam.

* * *
"I can't believe you ate the whole thing," Adam said, shaking his head.

Shanie grinned at him. "I told you I could eat it!"

"Your stomach must take up half of your body, Shanie. That burger was bigger than you are!"

"It was not! Are you going to finish your fries?"

Adam rolled his eyes as he pushed them toward her. "I don't believe this. I'm gonna call Kim's and make sure everything's all right."

"Okay," mumbled Shanie, her mouth full.

He shook his head and wandered to the pay phone. After digging out the required 75 cents, he dialed Kim's number by heart.

"Hello?" It was Tommy, and he sounded upset.

"Tom, what's wrong?"

"Adam, Billy's gotten worse. Rocky took him back to the clinic. You gotta get back here and pick the rest of us up."

"Be right there." Adam hurried back to the table. "Shanie, we gotta go. Billy's sick."

* * *
Adam rushed into the waiting room, followed closely by Tommy, Bulk, Skull, Shanie, and Aisha. Trini rose to meet him and collapsed into his arms, sobbing. "He's really sick, Adam," she managed. "Oh my God, he's really sick!"

Adam led Trini back to the couch and held her hand. She was trembling, and he felt as if his own control would break any minute. He swallowed hard. _I will not go nuts, I will not go nuts, I will not go nuts...._ He repeated the mantra to himself until he was almost sure it was true.

Kimberly was draped across one of the couches, nervously rubbing the locket Billy had left to her, staring at the closed door to Rocky's examining room. Leslie was stroking her hair gently, reassuring her. Tommy immediately went to her and held her tight, as Leslie respectfully moved down a few seats.

Kimberly spoke. "Tommy, why? Why is this happening? We only just...." She burst into tears and buried her face in his chest. Bulk and Skull stood awkwardly at the door, Skull holding Shanie's small hand tightly.

Shanie looked tearfully up at Skull. "Is my new brother going to die?"

Skull shook his head. "I hope not, Shanie." Aisha let out a wavering sob, and Skull put his arms around her reassuringly. "Come on, guys," he said, "Rocky'll figure this out. He knows what he's doing."

Leslie spoke up. "He does. He's studied this extensively. And he has a few friends he's worked with on it, they're in there too. If anybody can help Billy, it's these three. Just have a little faith."

* * *
"Dammit!" shouted Rocky, as Billy's vital signs continued to drop.

The petite woman at his side put a hand on his arm. "Sandy, calm down. You know you can't think when you're upset!"

"This isn't working," he growled, hooking up another I.V. "We're losing him!"

"You can't save everybody," insisted the man across the room. "We've tried everything. He's just... too far gone."

"No! I won't believe that." Rocky looked up into the man's eyes. "Look, Ron, this kid is... important to me. And there's a whole bunch of people out there counting on his to... fix him. We can't quit, not now. He's come so far...." Rocky's voice trailed off and his eyes filled with tears. He angrily swiped them away, glaring at the bleeping heart monitor. "I can't lose him now."

Ron stepped up to Billy's side and took his pulse. "He's fading fast. There's just too much of it, Sandy. It doesn't matter how much of this stuff we pump into him, it's already done too much damage."

The woman put an arm around Rocky. "Ron's right. I know it's hard, but sometimes you have to admit defeat."

Rocky was shaking. "No, Theresa, please. Please, don't give up. If we give up, he's got no chance."

"He already has no chance," she told him gently. "You know that as much as we do. Sandy... he's already gone."

Rocky turned his watery eyes to the readings on the heart monitor. The bleeps were coming farther and farther apart, and Billy's brain waves were almost flat line. "I've lost him," he whispered. "I...." he couldn't hold it in any longer and he broke down in tears. Ron and Theresa stayed close to him, and she held him as the heart monitor went off in a loud whine. "I've lost him."

* * *
Katie stepped closer to the exam room door. She could hear frantic voices inside; Rocky was panicking. The two others, a man and a woman, were trying to calm him down. After a few tense minutes, she heard a high pitched whine, and her heart jumped. _He's dead...?_

She glanced back at the others. From where they sat, they couldn't hear what was going on. It was a good thing, too. She didn't think they could handle it. She stepped up to the door and opened it slowly.

* * *
"Time of death..." Ron glanced at the clock. "7:45 pm."

"Wait," said a soft voice at the door. "Maybe I can get him back."

Ron turned around to see a young girl, maybe nineteen or twenty, standing in the doorway. "Excuse me, what are you doing in here?" he asked, shocked. They had given the group specific instructions to stay in the waiting room.

She stepped into the room, ignoring him. "Rocky, please let me try," she said, eying the body on the table. "Maybe... Maybe it's not too late."

"Are you a healer?" Theresa asked, still supporting Rocky.

"Yes." The girl nodded. "And I've... had experience with this before. My sister almost... please."

Rocky looked up at her with red eyes. "You know that's impossible," he managed. "You can't... it won't work on another healer."

"Maybe it will," she said stubbornly. "He's already dead, right? What do we have to lose? You've got to let me try."

"You could get hurt," Theresa warned her.

"I know. But I... he means a lot to all of us."

Rocky looked at Billy's lifeless body. "Yes, he does." He looked up at the heart monitor. "Good luck, Katie." And he stepped back.

Katie stepped up to Billy. He was so still. She touched her hand to his face and felt tears spring to her eyes. She remembered when they'd first found him. He'd looked much like this, the only difference the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest. "I won't let you die," she murmured, and she laid her hands on him.

She closed her eyes and concentrated. She pictured an energy that came from deep inside her heart and projected it to him. She thought about the explosion in the sky and the tree he'd fallen out of. She saw him, small and helpless, crying on her bathroom floor. She reached deep inside him, touched every inch of his being with her love, but something was blocking her. Something dark and slimy, that pushed her away. _The toxin! I have to get past it!_

Rocky watched Katie fearfully as all the blood began to drain from her face.

"Sandy...." said Ron tensely. "She's making herself sick...."

"Let me in," she was murmuring, tears flowing down her face.

"Katie..." Rocky stepped forward and put a hand on her shoulder, intending to pull her away, but a flash of energy slammed into him and sent him flying across the room.

Theresa screamed.

Katie was hit by a sudden flash of red, and by instinct she pushed it away. Then she realized that the red had somehow energized her. The slimy blockade was breaking up. She reached out for the red again, and pulled....

Leslie ran into the exam room when she heard Theresa's scream, and she saw Rocky lying motionless on the floor. "Rocky!" She started to run to him, but she slammed into an invisible wall and fell to the floor. His body was glowing a strange reddish color, and somehow, Katie seemed to be drawing him in. He moaned and shifted a little, and the red light flared....

The red grew stronger and combined itself with Katie's own energy, and she felt the slimy wall breaking down. She pushed harder. _Come on, let me in!_ She burst through the wall....

Rocky's eyes flew open as the red light suddenly dissipated. He gasped and curled up into a ball. Leslie ran to him, as did Theresa, but Ron watched Katie carefully. He had seen something....

Katie cried out as her presence slammed into Billy's at full force. Understanding and love filled her and she cried out, momentarily overwhelmed. He reached out to her....

The heart monitor let out a feeble bleep, and then another, and the group watched in amazement as Katie lifted her hands from Billy's body and slid limply to the floor.

* * *
Katie moaned and curled up into a ball. She was sore all over, and couldn't remember how she'd gotten that way. Something moved slightly next to her and she gasped. _What?_

She pushed herself up onto her elbows and realized she was lying on a cot in a doctor's office. There was another cot pushed right up against hers, and it was occupied by a sandy-haired young man. He appeared to be sleeping comfortably, and he looked familiar, but she couldn't recall his name. He moaned a little, and his hand opened as if in expectation of something. By instinct, she took the hand and squeezed it reassuringly. She rested her head on his chest and went back to sleep.

* * *
Billy sighed contentedly and smiled. He felt warm and comfortable, and his headache was gone for the first time in... _How long? What day is this?_ It suddenly occurred to him that he had no idea where he was or who he was with. _What happened? Trini?_ He heard voices from somewhere far away and he floated toward them.

* * *
"Why do you call him Sandy?" Kimberly could no longer ignore her curiosity. She had been hovering over Billy and Katie, who were both lying motionless on tables in Rocky's exam room. She had no idea what the current conversation was about, but she did know that Ron and Theresa had been calling Rocky "Sandy" the whole time.

Theresa giggled. "That's right, you all call him Rocky, don't you?"

"That's his name," Shanie answered simply. She wasn't sure she liked this Theresa lady, and it was obvious Leslie wasn't too fond of her either. She kept glaring at her from across the room. Rocky was caught between the two, and refused to look either one in the eyes.

"Actually," joked Ron, "his name is Rockwell, so anything we want to call him is fair game."

"Call me Rockwell and you lose an arm," growled Rocky good-naturedly.

"Okay, okay." Ron laughed. "We started calling him Sandy back in Med. School and it just stuck, I guess. I haven't heard anyone but Leslie call him Rocky in a long time."

"Yeah, everyone from school calls me Sandy," put in Rocky resignedly. "I stopped protesting when I realized it wouldn't work."

"But why?" Shanie voiced Kimberly's thoughts plaintively. "You didn't answer WHY!"

"It was a friend from school," answered Ron. "He was really wired, I think he'd drunk about three bottles of Jolt, or something. He was talking a mile a minute, so we started testing him with tongue twisters and such. He got them all perfectly, so we decided to try a different tactic."

"We told him to say everyone's first and last name," continued Theresa. "Which he also did perfectly, until he got to Rocky's name."

"That's when he called me Sandy DeRockos," said Rocky, sighing. "I could never live it down."

Skull laughed. "Sandy DeRockos? I like it. I think I'll call you Sandy, too."

"Not if you like having two arms, you won't," answered Rocky.

"I thought that was the punishment for Rockwell," piped up Tommy.

"Fine. If you call me Rockwell, you lose an arm. You call me Sandy, you lose a leg. How's that?"

"Oh, okay."

"Guys, I think Billy's waking up," said Adam suddenly.

"Yes," said Trini excitedly. "I saw his lips move!"

The group gathered around Billy, waiting breathlessly. "Billy?" Kimberly spoke haltingly, nervously fingering her locket. "Billy, can you hear me?"

His eyelids fluttered. "Kmmmbrlly?" His chapped lips stuck together, and he licked them slowly. "Trini?" His eyes opened slowly. "Kate... Katie?"

"We're here, Billy," Trini said joyfully, holding his hand tightly. "All of us."

"Billy, it's about time you woke up," Kimberly managed through her tears. "You took forever!" He rolled his head toward her and she kissed his cheek gently. "It's good to have you back."

"Where'd I go?" he murmured drowsily. "Where am I?"

"You got really sick," Trini answered, stroking the hair away from his face. "You almost died."

"But Katie saved you!" Shanie practically yelled the news. "She healed you!"

"Healed me? What--?"

Rocky busied himself checking Billy's pulse and temperature as he spoke. "You lost consciousness at Kimberly's place. I hoped you'd recover with some time to rest, but you just got worse. We brought you here-- you're in my clinic, by the way-- and some friends of mine helped me out with the treatment. Katie stepped in with a last minute save. She's still resting."

"Hmmmm." Billy let out a long sigh and curled up on his side. "Okay...." He started to drift off.

"You're gonna be fine, buddy," he heard Jason say. Kimberly and Trini stood side by side, both of them warm and close by. He smiled and snuggled closer to them, and he fell asleep.

* * *
Billy leaned back against the couch cushions, closing his eyes. "Oh Kim, don't stop. Ooooohhh...."

Kimberly giggled as she continued to massage his feet. "You'd think you never had a foot massage before!"

"I haven't," he murmured. "Is that bad?"

"I hope not," answered Skull from across the room. "Cause I've never had one either."

"You're kidding me!" said Adam, looking up momentarily from his laptop. "An old man like you?!"

The four friends were lounging in Kimberly's living room. Rocky was back at the clinic keeping a close eye on Katie, who hadn't recovered as quickly as Billy. Everyone else had gone back to their normal lives and paying jobs, but Bulk had given Skull a whole month off to help Kimberly care for Billy, and had even taken over care of Shanie until Billy was better. Adam was staying in Kimberly's guest room. Billy had worried at first that he was interfering with Adam's work, but Adam assured him that as long as he had his laptop, he was always at work.

Skull stuck his tongue out at Adam. "I am not old, thank you. I'm merely... not quite young."

"Yeah, sure, rub it in...." Billy smiled slightly, then yawned. "Hey, Skull?" he said sleepily.

"Yeah?"

"Has Bulk found out about... the adoption thing yet?"

"He's getting the papers drawn up for Katie and Shanie, but he was waiting on you for a while until we could come up with a realistic story. Why?"

"Well, um... no offense, but.... I don't think I could handle you being my father. It'd be... it's just too much, you know? But... I really appreciate the offer. Okay?"

Skull smiled and slumped down in his chair. "Thank God! I mean, no offense to you, either, but... yeah, that's just too weird."

Kimberly looked concerned. "But what will we do? Billy still doesn't exist!"

Adam looked up at them, a dreaming look on his face. "He grew up in the streets," he said slowly, an odd detached tone to his voice. The others stared at him confusedly. "His mother did her best to support him, scrounging up food and shelter wherever she could, but it was never quite enough. He did not know who his father was; his mother, if she knew, refused to mention a name. He did not even know his own name; he only knew that he was hers, and that she loved him.
"As he grew older, a longing developed inside him. A longing for something more than the harsh, monotonous life of the streets. He took to spending his days in the public library, sitting alone at a table far in the back, reading everything he could reach. The librarians hated him at first; his clothing was dirty and he scared away the regulars, but they saw how much he enjoyed reading, and learning. They began to set aside books for him when he came in.
"One day the library got a new trainee, and she was fascinated by the boy. She had been warned that he did not like to speak, and was shy around new people, but her curiosity overcame her and she approached him, asking his name. He looked at her, frightened, and he ran off, and did not come back for days.
"The trainee felt so badly for him that she spent her free time for the next week looking for him. She asked everyone she could find if they had seen the young boy who liked to read, and finally she found him. He was huddled in dark alley, hugging his only jacket close to his body, shivering in the chilly air. She crept away and bought him a sandwich; the biggest sub she could find, and she gave it to him. He looked confused, as though her kindness shocked him. She merely smiled and left him alone.
"She began to visit him every day on her lunch break, always bringing him the biggest sub she could find. One day, when she came, he was with an older woman, her body bent and twisted after a long, hard life in the streets. She watched, unnoticed, as the boy gave the woman half of his sandwich and called her Mother. From then on, there were two sandwiches waiting in the alley every afternoon.
"The boy grew into a young man, and his curiosity about the world once again overcame him. He crept into the public school as classes were beginning, and sat in the back of a classroom as the children filed in and out. He said nothing, merely listened quietly and learned. The teachers began handing him the same tests as the other students out of curiosity, and were shocked to see how well he did. He had no books, and yet his were the best grades in all of his classes.
"The principal soon learned of this strange, dirty child who never spoke, so he visited the classroom and watched. He was amazed at the boy's eagerness to learn, at the near perfect grades he received on every test. Finally he pulled the boy aside. Where are you from? The boy did not answer. Where did you learn to read and write? Again, the boy did not answer; he merely stared at his tattered sneakers, shaking in fear. The principal left him alone, and the boy continued to attend classes. He still had no name.
"The curious trainee had since become a librarian, and it saddened her that her young charge no longer visited the library. Late one night, she began to prepare him a gift.
"The boy awoke one morning to find a sub next to him, wrapped in plastic. There was a note attached to the top. Curious, he opened the note, and a small card fell out. Happy reading!, said the note, and it was signed 'a friend.' The boy picked up the card. It was a brand-new library card, made out for Billy Michaels.
"And so he had a name, and a friend in the young librarian. It was a shock when the boy visited the library one bright and sunny Tuesday and was told that his friend was dead; hit by a truck on her way home from work. The boy went back to his alley and made a decision. It was time to move on. He left his alley and never returned; leaving only a tattered library card in his wake."

Adam blinked and seemed to jump a bit. Skull, Kimberly, and Billy were staring at him open-mouthed. "Wooooo...." he said, shaking his head as if to clear it. "That was a good one." He nonchalantly went back to writing his article.

Billy looked at Kimberly, then at Skull, and back to Kimberly again. She shrugged apologetically. "But... but what happened?" asked Billy finally.

"What?" Adam looked up again. "Oh. Um... he ended up in Angel Grove where he met... a rich and kindly Asian gentleman who took him under his wing and... stuff."

"Stuff?" Skull jumped to his feet and faced Adam frustratedly. "After all that, you end with 'and stuff'?!"

"Sorry." Adam shrugged. "The moment ended."

"The moment...?" Skull sank back into his chair and began muttering to himself. Kim began to giggle, while Adam just kept typing obliviously.

"Rich, kindly Asian gentleman?" said Billy slowly. "What was his name?"

"Oh, you know his name," said Adam sheepishly. "I figured I've been living off you for eighteen years, so I might as well return the favor. My home is your home, and all that."

"Oh. Thanks."

"Uh-huh. Now shut up, I gotta deadline."

Billy blinked. "Right."

Skull was still muttering to himself. "Calls himself a writer and ends a story with 'and stuff,' who does he think he is?...." Billy and Kimberly burst out laughing, and Adam finally decided to get up and moved into another room.

"Y'all are way too loud," he said as he left.

* * *
"Wait, so you're Billy Michaels now?" Aisha looked to Skull for confirmation. He just shrugged.

"I don't know," answered Billy. "Adam didn't really finish the story."

"You know how he ended?" Skull still sounded peeved. "You know what he said?"

Aisha raised an eyebrow. "How?"

"And stuff! He ended it with 'and stuff'!"

Aisha laughed and kissed Skull's cheek gently. "Hey, he can't always come up with winners!"

"Yeah, but... and stuff?!"

Adam appeared in the living room entryway, arms crossed. "Yeah, and...? I didn't hear you coming up with anything better."

"Adam!" Aisha stood and ran to hug him. "Did you finish your article?"

He nodded. "Yeah, finally. Without the three of them yakking," he offhandedly gestured at Billy, Kim, and Skull. "It went pretty quickly. I faxed it in a few minutes ago."

"What was it about?" asked Kim curiously.

"An article for Details magazine about current psychiatric treatments for nutcases. I had to do a little research, but you'd be amazed at what you can find on the 'net these days. I haven't been to a library in..." he thought about it for a second. "Oh, ten years, maybe?"

"I haven't seen any of your articles yet," remarked Billy. "Do you have copies?"

"Sure. I'll show you Details' web site later, they have their archives posted there, and I have about three articles for them. Then there's Rolling Stone, where I interviewed Sting--"

"You interviewed STING?!" Billy fairly shrieked the question.

Adam looked amused. "Yeah. He and I are buddies now. He thinks I'm a hoot. He turned one of my poems into a song not to long ago."

"NO WAY!"

Kimberly put a calming hand on Billy's shoulder. "Easy, guy," she said nervously. "You'll get sick again...."

"YOU HAVE A POEM THAT'S A STING SONG AND YOU'RE BUDDIES?!"

Adam laughed out loud. "I'll have to introduce you. I'll tell him the truth and we'll see what he says. He thinks I'm a total nut as it is."

"You are a nut, aren't you?" teased Kimberly.

"Well, yeah, but not like he says." Adam made a face. "The way he tells it you'd think I was... schitzo, or something."

"I don't believe this...." Billy mumbled to himself. "Sting, of all people. Buddies. My God...."

Adam tried to hold back his laughter. "You okay, Billy?"

"Oh, yeah, sure. I'm fine. Sting...."

There was a knock on the door. "Hello!" called a musical voice.

"Trini!" Billy snapped out of his stupor and his face brightened. "Trini's here!"

Skull raised an eyebrow. "I'd forgotten what it was like to be seventeen," he remarked.

"What?" Aisha looked confused.

"All hormones, man. No brain."

"Shut up!" shouted Billy, and Trini was greeted with a burst of laughter as Kim let her in.

"What's going on here?" she put her hands on her hips and gave them a disapproving look.

"Nothing, Trini," said Adam innocently. "What could possibly be going on?"

"I don't want to know."

Skull let out his trademark high-pitched giggle, and the room exploded into laughter again. Trini rolled her eyes. "Right. Listen, guys, could I talk to Billy alone?"

"All right!" Adam let out a whoop and winked at Billy. "Way to go, my friend!"

Billy blushed deeply. Something in Trini's tone told him there was no need for congratulations.

The others filed out of the room, and Trini sat next to him on the couch-bed. She put an arm around him and he leaned into her hesitantly. "What's wrong?" he asked, afraid to hear the answer.

"Billy..." she looked at him sadly. "I... God, I can't believe this. I don't want to hurt you."

His throat tightened and he gulped a little. "Don't worry," he managed. "I think I know what you're going to say. I can take it."

Trini hugged him close to her as she let the words pour forth. "Billy, I really do love you, and I meant everything I've said these past few days, but I realized something. We just can't do this. We can't be together. Too many years have passed, too many... I've changed Billy, and you've stayed... the same. I loved you when I was seventeen, and a part of me loves you still, but...."

Billy cut her off. "I understand," he said softly, tears beginning to slide down his cheeks. "It's okay, really."

"No, it's not." She was crying now, too, and they held each other tightly, unwilling to let go. "I started this, I kissed you first. I led you on."

"You didn't know," he assured her. "You didn't know how it would be. You... love the idea of me. The older me. But this...." he gestured to himself, smiling a little. "This is not what you had in mind."

Trini laughed slightly, and kissed his cheek gently. "I guess you do understand. Billy, I... I wish...."

"Don't. Don't ever wish. It only makes it harder to accept... the now."

They held each other as they cried.

* * *
Rocky looked sharply over as Katie moaned again. Her face was flushed and her fever had risen three degrees in the past ten minutes. He cursed under his breath and applied another cold compress.

"How's she doing?" Leslie came up behind him, almost afraid to hear his answer.

"I never should have let her do it!" He turned away from them and slammed his fist into the counter. "She just gets worse and nothing I do helps. I knew it would hurt her, I knew!"

Leslie put a calming hand on his shoulder. "Rocky, she wanted to do it. She knew the risks."

"No, she didn't. Dammit, Leslie, I'm the doctor, she's just a kid!" He closed his eyes against the tears that threatened to spill from them. "God, I can't do anything right."

She grabbed him and turned him roughly around to face her. "Stop it, right now. You know better than that!"

"Do I?" His eyes were burning in a way Leslie had never seen before, and she stepped back, unable to hide her shock. "Do I really, Leslie? Look at her! Her temp's risen to 104.8 degrees already and it's still rising. She's got bruises all over her body, sprained muscles, her heart's going a mile a minute... and you say I know better than to blame myself?! Ron warned me, you heard him. Theresa warned me. They said, 'Stop her, she's hurting herself!' But all I cared about was saving Billy. Well, what about Shanie? Did I think about what it would mean her her to lose her only sister? No! Did I think about what it would mean to Skull to lose the daughter he always wanted? No! I only thought of myself! If she dies, Leslie, it's my fault. I never should have--"

Leslie finally lost it and slapped him, hard, across the face. "Shut up, Rocky, just shut up!" He stared at her in shock, and his hand moved slowly, involuntarily, to the rising red mark on his cheek. "You couldn't have stopped her, Rocky." Leslie spoke more quietly now, and she took his hands in her own. "She would have found a way to try. Even if you were somehow able to prevent her from doing it, she would have wondered for the rest of her life if she could have helped. All of us would wonder. And you'd be feeling guilty anyway for 'letting him die'. Rocky, you didn't do anything wrong. You did your best with Billy and you're doing your best with Katie. What else is there?"

Rocky didn't speak. He pulled away from her and approached the examination table on which Katie lay. He stood there for a long while, looking down at her. "I don't know, Leslie." His voice was choked with tears. "I just don't know anymore."

Leslie ran to him and enfolded his trembling body in her arms; his tears soaked her shirt.

* * *
Adam watched Billy carefully; he wasn't eating, just staring at his plate and sighing every once in a while. He glanced to Kim and Skull, who had obviously noticed, too. She shrugged as Skull shook his head. _What do we do?_

Adam shrugged in reply. _I don't know._ The three of them went back to their dinners reluctantly, for lack of anything better to do. Then Adam got an idea. "Sighs At The Dinner Table," he said, winking at Skull. "By Adam Park." Billy looked up, curious. Adam took this as encouragement and continued:

"Pass the butter
Pass the peas
What do we say?
Oh yeah, please

Needs some salt
Needs some taste
Starving in Africa
What a waste

How was school?
How was work?
Need a napkin
Dropped my fork

Clean your plate
Or get no dessert
Can we have ice cream?
Broccoli first

Pass the butter,
Pass the peas.
Aww, lemme go.
Please?"

Adam smiled at Billy's open-mouthed expression. "You like it?"

"When did you write that? It's not in any of your books!"

"I know." Adam winked at him. "But it will be."

Billy looked at Kim, then Skull, then back at Adam. "But.... Did you...? Did he...?"

Kimberly shrugged. "You never know, with him."

Billy looked at Adam again, then shook his head and picked up his fork. "I'll never get used to this."

"Billy, are you okay?" Skull took over, feeling more comfortable now that the silence had been broken.

Billy looked up vaguely, shrugging. "I guess. Sure."

"You know Trini still loves you. You guys will be great friends," added Kim.

Billy tried to smile but failed miserably. "I know."

The three adults shared another look. _What now?_ Before anyone could speak again, the phone rang. "I'll get it." Kim stood and went into the kitchen. Adam and Skull sat watching Billy as he built a volcano with his mashed potatoes.

Kim was on the phone for only a few moments, and then she returned to the dining room, looking more than a little pale.

Skull noticed the look on her face and was almost afraid to ask, "What's wrong?"

Kim sat down heavily. "What? Oh, it's nothing, really."

"Nothing?" Adam raised an eyebrow. "You look horrible, how could it have been nothing?"

Kimberly managed a laugh. "I always look horrible Adam. It's really nothing."

This time, Adam and Skull both caught the warning look she threw in Billy's direction. Unfortunately, so did Billy.

* * *
Billy lay still, staring at the ceiling, trying to fall asleep. It wasn't working. He kept seeing Kim's drawn face at he table and wondering. What could possibly be wrong? It obviously had something to do with him, that much he knew. The look she had given Adam and Skull was proof of that.

He sighed again and rolled over. The couch-bed was lumpy, but he'd neglected to tell Kim about it for fear of sounding ungrateful. He knew how hard it was for her to take care of him all the time, even with Adam and Skull there to help. He wasn't about to make it harder.

Almost as soon as thoughts of them crossed his mind, he heard the television go off in the guest room where Adam slept. "Can I talk to you, Adam?" Kim's voice floated into the living room, her voice reflecting her distress.

_I'll bet she's going to tell him about whatever she heard on the phone!_ Billy rolled out of the bed and crept toward the guest room.

* * *
Kim approached and sat next to Adam on the bed. He scooted over to give her more room, but she merely sighed. "You know that phone call I got this evening?"

"How could I forget?"

"Well, you were right. Something is wrong. Adam, it's Katie."

Adam's heart leapt into his throat. "What about her?"

"That was Leslie on the phone. She said Katie's a lot sicker than we thought. Rocky didn't want to worry Billy, so he didn't say anything. But she's... she's really really sick."

"What do you mean by really really sick?"

Kimberly paused, seemingly afraid to look him in the eyes. "Ron was right when he said healing Billy would hurt her. With him being another healer... the repercussions were too much. She's... she's dying, Adam."

Adam's gasp of shock was drowned out by an anguished cry from the hallway. "Noooo!"

* * *
Rocky looked up vaguely as Adam, Kimberly, and Skull walked in, pushing Billy in a rented wheelchair. The boy looked so small and frail, Rocky swore he felt his heart rip in half. He swallowed hard and concentrated on Katie.

"Hi," said Skull somewhat tonelessly.

Rocky nodded a little and wouldn't meet their eyes. "Leslie told me she called you," he said quietly. "I wish she hadn't."

"We want to give our support," said Kimberly, pushing Billy's wheelchair closer to the exam table. "To you and Katie."

Rocky seemed to sigh a little, but he didn't respond. He just moved aside so Billy could get a closer look at Katie.

Billy looked up at Rocky, realizing that he'd never seen his old friend look so upset. Was Katie really that bad? He couldn't see her very clearly, sitting down as he was, so he took hold of the arms of the chair and pulled himself to a standing position. Adam protested briefly, but a look from Billy silenced him and he stepped back.

Katie lay still on the table, her skin pale and glistening with sweat. She had and IV in each arm, and a heart monitor bleeped none-too-steadily at her side. Billy looked at Rocky again; he was leaning back against the counter, eyes cast downward. "Rocky?"

Rocky didn't respond. He turned his face away.

"Rocky, is Katie going to... is she going to be okay?"

Rocky sighed. "I... I hope so. I'm doing the best I can."

"I know you are." Billy took a closer look. Was Rocky crying?

Adam suddenly appeared behind him, putting an arm around his waist. "Billy, you need to rest," he said, sounding concerned. "You don't need to make yourself sick."

Billy shook his head. "It's not right. Why did she heal me if it could hurt her? Why should she have to trade her life for mine?"

Rocky abruptly left the room, nearly slamming into Leslie as he left. She stared after him sadly but didn't follow. "He's blaming himself," she told them sadly. "He hasn't been home in days, he just stays here with her. I'm afraid...." He voice trailed off, as if she couldn't bear to finish the sentence.

Billy looked shocked. "Blaming himself? Why?"

"He knew that healing you might hurt her, but he didn't stop her. He couldn't have stopped her.... He's torn. He wanted more than anything for you to be all right, but he never wanted Katie to get hurt. It's tearing him up inside."

Billy stared down at Katie, his mind in turmoil. "No...." He felt his throat tighten. "No, it's all my fault. How could I have just barged back into your lives? I should have just... I've ruined everything for all of you. God, why couldn't I have just died in that explosion?"

Adam immediately grabbed his shoulders and roughly turned him around to face him. Billy shrank back from the rage in his eyes. "Don't you ever say that!" Kim stepped forward and put a hand on Adam's shoulder, but he shrugged her off. "Don't you ever say that again, you hear me?"

Billy's eyes widened and he tried to pull away, but Adam's grip was too strong.

"I am sick and tired of everybody blaming themselves for what happened here. It's not your fault, it's not Tom's fault, it's not Rocky's fault, dammit, it's nobody's fault!" Adam shook him, hard, and Billy cried out. "Rotten things just happen. They happen all the time. There is no point in what ifs and if onlys. You can't change the past, so you deal with it. You don't blame yourself and wish you were dead, for Christ sakes. God, Billy, don't you realize that all you're doing is making everybody else feel worse! Don't you remember everything I've told you? I tried to kill myself years ago, and what good did it do? None! I hurt Rocky, I hurt Aisha, I hurt Tommy, I hurt my family... I hurt everybody who cared about me. I know what you were thinking, Billy, I had that same look on my face way too many times."

"No! Stop it!" Billy was crying now, eyes squeezed shut, trying in vain to block Adam out. "Stop it!"

Adam let him go abruptly and he slid to the floor, shaking with tears. "Dammit, Billy, I've had it. I've had it! Quit feeling sorry for yourself and do something! You're supposed to be the resident genius, so prove it! Get off your butt and use your brain. Talk to Rocky, tell him it's not his fault. Tell him you want to help. Do something! Christ!" He threw his hands up in the air and stalked out of the room, shoving Skull aside on his way out.

No one spoke for a long while, and the only sounds in the room were Billy's sobs and the mechanical beating of Katie's heart.

* * *
Trini watched Billy carefully all through the drive to Adam's house. He was silent, staring out of the window, the dark circles under his eyes only emphasizing the paleness of his skin. He had been like this for days, ever since finding out about Katie. According to Rocky, if he didn't snap out of it and start taking care of himself, he would die.

Trini choked back the tears threatening to spill from her eyes and took his hand gently. "Billy?" He didn't respond. "Billy, everything will be okay, you'll see. Katie'll be fine, and you'll recover. Both of you just need time." Still nothing. She pulled him close to her, stroking his hair. He seemed to melt into her and he sighed a little, but he still didn't speak.

Adam turned around and watched them carefully. He could feel himself slowly coming unhinged and was fighting against it with all his might, but he knew he was on the losing side of the battle. _Just hang on, Adam,_ he told himself, determinedly. _You have to be strong, for Billy. He needs you._

_Talking to yourself again, Adam?_ said a mocking voice from somewhere inside him. _Not a good sign, m'boy._ Adam paled and slouched down in his seat.

Skull saw this from the driver's seat and shook his head. Everybody was falling apart. Katie and Billy were sick, Rocky and Trini were overwhelmed with guilt, and Adam was going nuts again. What else could possibly go wrong? The second this thought crossed his head, he cursed himself. _Dammit, Gene, you just jinxed everybody! Now something HAS to go wrong. Wonderful._

Adam giggled a little in the seat next to him.

* * *
Billy watched Adam expressionlessly as he paced back and forth across the living room floor, muttering to himself. He was holding a small bear in a white lab coat that he had dug out of the basement a few hours before. Billy recognized it as his own bear, Al. He'd had Al since he was little, and had named it after Albert Einstein. So what was Adam doing with it? If he remembered the will correctly, he'd left all his stuffed animals to Jason.

Adam stopped pacing for a second and looked at him. "What?" he said, somewhat accusingly.

Billy just blinked and didn't answer. Lately he didn't have much of anything to say.

Adam glared at him and went back to his pacing. "I am not going nuts, I am not going nuts, I am not going nuts...." He was saying it over and over again, pulling rhythmically on Al's right ear.

Billy stood and wandered into Adam's bedroom. The laptop lay on the bed, its top open but the power off. After a moment of thought, Billy picked it up and turned it on. He sat on the edge of Adam's bed and got to work.

* * *
Rocky finally gave up on trying to hold everything in and burst into tears. Ron and Theresa stood at a respectable distance away, watching sadly. Shanie stood wide-eyed, clutching Skull's hand. "Skull?" Skull didn't respond. He turned his head away. "Skull, why's Dr. Rocky crying?"

Ron took a deep breath and knelt down to face the little girl. "Shanie... Shanie, do you remember what Rocky told you before? About how Katie was sick?"

"Yes. But he said she was gonna get better. So why's he crying?"

Ron heard Theresa let out a muffled "Oh God" behind him, and tried to ignore it. "Well, Shanie, we did the best we could, but... but Katie was very very sick."

"What do you mean? How sick?" Shanie's voice rose in pitch, and Ron had to force himself to look directly into her eyes.

"I'm afraid Katie's... she died, Shanie. Katie's dead."

Shanie shook her head insistently. "No, she's not, she'll get better. She can heal herself, right? She healded Billy and she's healded me before so she can heal herself and she won't be dead, right?"

Ron shook his head. "I'm sorry, Shanie. Katie's not coming back."

"Never? Not ever?" Tears began to spill down her cheeks and Ron had to look away. "But you said.... He said...." Her voice trailed off and she looked over at Rocky. He was slumped over the counter, head in hands. Shanie suddenly broke away from Skull and ran over to him. She kicked him, hard, on the shin. "You lied to me," she screamed, the dam finally breaking. "You lied to me, you said she was gonna be okay! I hate you! I hate you!" She kept saying it over and over, kicking, punching, sobbing, until Skull finally broke out of his stupor and grabbed her, dragging her away. "You can't cry!" she was still screaming, struggling against him. "You can't cry, she's my sister not yours and it's your fault! I HATE YOU!"

Skull pulled her out of the room and the three doctors could hear him trying with little success to calm her. Rocky lifted his head from his hands and slid to the floor. "I know," he whispered. "I'm sorry."

* * *
Billy coughed violently, cursing as he made yet another typo and had to go back. A trickle of sweat ran into his eyes and he angrily swiped at his forehead. Jason and Christine had taken over his care since Adam's admittance into the hospital, and he found that despite her diminutive appearance, Christine was every bit as tough as Jason. They refused to let him go for very long without sleeping or eating, even if they had to physically remove the laptop from his possession. Both she and Jason seemed to understand that he was working on something of great importance, but he refused to tell them what it was.

He actually hadn't spoken to anyone at all, not for a long time. He had remained silent through Katie's illness, her subsequent death, the funeral, and Adam's breakdown. He merely sat there, working feverishly at the laptop, ignoring the warnings his body tried to give him as he grew sicker and sicker. Shanie and Skull had come for a brief visit, but had left in a hurry when Shanie told Billy in no uncertain terms that she wished he had died instead of Katie. Zack, Aisha and Tommy still came to see him every once in a while, but most of the time just ended up sitting around, watching him work. Bulk never visited, but he called at least once a week to check up on everyone. Kimberly rarely came anymore, and Trini told them sadly that she was falling back on old habits. Bulemic alcoholics rarely think of anyone but themselves, so it was no surprise that Kim pretty much kept to herself.

Rocky and Leslie stopped by often, but most of the time he just acted as a doctor and nothing more. Leslie confided to Christine that he had withdrawn from her, and rarely smiled anymore. She was seriously considering leaving him, but was afraid of what effect this would have on his already fragile mental state. So she stayed, though neither one of them was happy.

Through it all, Billy just kept working. His fingers became cramped and his breathing grew labored, but he kept going. He lost weight and developed a terrible cough, but still he worked. And Jason and Christine watched in silence.

* * *
Billy let out a cry of joy as he finally finished his work. He was rewarded for it by a new coughing fit. Jason and Christine came running into the room, alarmed. "What's going on?" Christine was at his side in a second, trying to take the laptop away.

"No!" Billy yanked it away from her. "I did it, Christine, I did it!"

Jason approached slowly, seemingly afraid. "Did what?"

"I can reopen the time hole, Jason. I can go home."

"What? How?"

"Well, it required thorough research about the atmosphere back in 1996 and today. Once all the data, I was able to..." he caughed violently and it took him a moment before he could continue. "...combine the results and merge the two atmospheres. I took into account the positions of the moon, sun, and all the planets and stars, and integrated that into the program as well. A bit of careful programming followed, and now all I have to do to open the time hole is initiate the program."

Jason and Christine looked at one another, wide-eyed. "Wait a minute, you mean, you can... undo all of this? You can go back to the past?"

"Yes." Billy nodded. "Adam and Kimberly... and Katie... I can't let things end like this for them. I've got to try to undo the damage I did years ago."

Christine looked frightened, and she grabbed on to Jason's arm protectively. "But... but what about us?"

Billy looked confused. "What?"

"If you change the past... what if we never meet? More importantly, what if Adam never discovers his writing talent? What if... Shanie might never be born!"

Billy nodded. "I've thought of all that. Jason, you've told me of the circumstances of your meeting, and I'm going to do everything in my power to insure that it still happens. You two belong together, I'm sure of it. As far as Adam goes, I'm sure he'd rather have his mental health than his writing career. Besides, the talent was always there. He just needs encouragement. Shanie... well, I can't help that. Maybe everything will work out, somehow. Maybe--" he broke off as he was overcome by another coughing fit. This time, the force of it doubled him over, and Jason had to grab the laptop away before it fell to the floor.

"Give it to me," Billy ordered weakly when he was able. "I've got to go."

Jason looked hard at him, still holding onto the laptop. "Billy, you're sick. How do we know you're well enough to handle this? Maybe we should call Rocky--"

"For God's sake, no! Rocky's almost as bad as Adam, and you know it. Leave him alone. Both of you know full well if I don't go back, Kim will die, Adam and Rocky will spend the rest of their lives in nuthouses, and Tommy... well, who knows with Tommy. Let me do this, please?" He held out his hands, and Jason found himself relinquishing control of the tiny computer. "Stand back," ordered Billy, his voice hoarse.

Jason and Christine stepped back a few feet, and then even farther as Billy waved them away. Billy pressed a few keys and there was an explosion of energy in front of them. They clung to each other as Billy jumped through the vortex... and their world ceased to exist.

Losing the Blues by Kittie

Losing the Blues
by Kittie