*The Blues Brothers*
Jake: Give us a bottle of your finest champagne, five shrimp cocktails and some bread for my brother.
Jake: I hate Illinois Nazis.
Elwood: We're on a mission from God.
Mystery Woman:You contemptible pig! I remained celibate for you.
stood at the back of a cathedral waiting, in celibacy, for
you with three hundred friends and relatives in
attendance. My uncle hired the best Romanian caterers in
the state. To obtain the seven limousines for the wedding
party, my father used up his last favors with Mad Pete
Trullo.So for me, for my mother, my grandmother, my father, my
uncle, and the common good, I must now kill you. And your
brother.
Jake:Oh, Please don't kill us! Please, please, don't kill us!
You know I love you, baby. I wouldn't leave you. It
wasn't my fault!
Mystery Woman:You miserable slug. You think you can talk your way out
of this? You betrayed me!
Jake: No, I didn't. Honest. I ran out of gas! I had a flat tire! I didn't have enough money for cab fare! My tux didn't come back from the cleaners! An old friend came in
from out of town! Someone stole my car! There was an
earthquake! A terrible flood! Locusts! IT WASN'T MY
FAULT I SWEAR TO GOD!!!
Elwood:It's 106 miles to Chicago, we've got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark and
we're wearing sunglasses.
Jake: Hit it!
Return to the index.
Gutter: Its grunge night at the Vienna house. The Merkins are opening for Frog and Toad Are Friends. I gotta psyche up for the show.
Droz: Frog and Toad Are Friends, thats with the guy from The Clash, right? The Clash... I don't know if you're aware of this Gutter, but there was music recorded before 1989. What is this? You're gonna wear this to the show. Youre gonna wear the shirt of the band that you're gonna go see. Don't be that guy.
Droz: Pigman! PIGMAN!
Tom: Whats he doing?
Droz: He's finishing his senior thesis. Pigman is trying to prove the Caine-Hackman Theory: No matter what time it is, 24 hours a day, you can find a Michael Caine or Gene Hackman movie playing on TV.
Tom: That's his thesis?
Droz: Yes! Thats the beauty of college these days, Tommy! You can major in Gameboy if you know how to bullshit.
Moonbeam: Remove that nail, butcher!
Dave #1: Hey!
Dave #2: Whats your deal?
Moonbeam: I just heard that tree shriek. How would you like it if I nailed a sign into a layer of your fat? Do it again and youre toast. Save the planet, peace!
Cosmo: Hey! The weasel snagged the bee!
Mersh: All right. Bong hits anyone?
Cosmo: Aye.
Return to the index.
*Soapdish*
Celeste: Why are you here?
Jeffrey: This is my apartment. I live here. Why are you here?
Celeste: I'll tell you why I'm here, oh I'll tell you why I'm here. I'm here because I...
Jeffrey: Go on, go on! Say it!
Celeste: I...
Jeffrey: Go on! Say it!
Celeste: I...
Jeffrey: I want you Jeffrey! I'm consumed with jealousy for my niece! I want you.
Celeste: Oh please.
Jeffrey: You still have feelings for me, admit it!
Celeste: My feelings are about you not for you theres a very big difference!
Jeffrey: No, you're ashamed of them but you still have the feelings! You realize what a terrible mistake it was throwing me out of your life a hundred and ten years ago!
Celeste: Look at you, you're exactly the same even for and actor! You're an egomaniac!
Jeffrey: Of course I'm an egomaniac! Ive got America's Sweetheart climbing up my drain pipe!
Return to the index.
*St. Elmos Fire*
Kirbo: Its true love my friend.
Kevin: Love, love, you know what love is? Love is an illusion created by lawyer types like yourself to perpetuate another illusion called marriage to create the reality of divorce and then the illusionary need for divorce lawyers.
Billy: Just can't deal with the little Misses. Can I crash?
Kevin: You know there are more people on law school right now than there are lawyers on the entire planet? Think about that.
Kirbo: You are just pissed off and bitter because you have not had sex in how long, what is it, a year, maybe two? Refresh my memory please, Kevin. Haven1t you ever heard of the Sexual Revolution?
Kevin: Who won, huh? Nobody. Used to be sex was the only free thing. No longer. Alimony, palimony... Its all financial. Love is an illusion.
Kirbo: Its the only illusion that counts, my friend.
Kevin: Says who?
Kirbo: Anyone whos every been in love.
Kevin: Love sucks.
Kirbo: So does your attitude.
Kevin: Uh huh huh huh.
Jules: Do you know that you are the only guy at school who never made a pass at me?
Kevin: Well, if you noticed I never joined the army either.
Jules: Kev, you've got a problem. You're gay and youre madly in love with Alec.
Kevin: I see.
Jules: I mean, its OK. We all love Alec, hes our hero. But hes very very straight, and very taken. Kev, theres nothing to be ashamed of.
Kevin: Jules, there's the brink of insanity and then there is the abyss which obviously you have fallen in to.
Jules: Gay became very sheik in the 70s.
Kevin: No, I not ashamed, I am not gay, and I am not staying.
Return to the index.
*Flatliners*
Nelson: Give me 30 seconds. Set the blanket up to warm, take me up to 93 degrees, slowly. Inject one cc of adrenaline and at one minute, Joe you come in with the defibs, and you bring me back to life.
Mannis: With brain damage. Resembling in many ways, a cabbage patch doll.
Nelson: not with a body temperature of 86 degrees. Dr. Mannis, will you handle the injections?
Nelson: Philosophy failed. Religion failed. Now its up the physical science. I think mankind deserves to know.
Joe: So youre doing this for mankind?
Nelson: This letter absolves you of any responsibility, just in case.
Steckle: This isn't for mankind, this is for Nelson. Why do I suddenly see you on 60 Minutes, sandwiched between Andy Rooney and a Subaru commercial? Tonight, a brilliant young medical student dares to experience death, and come back.
Nelson: Fame is inevitable
Mannis: Thats the wrong reason.
Nelson: Its the right idea. Dr. Hurley, electrons. C'mon Joe, dont you want to be on 60 Minutes?
David: Die to be a hero someday but dont die to be a celebrity.
Steckle: This could be the conquest of our generation. The last great frontier. Look, first we had the sea, then America, the west, the moon, Mr. Leary, drugs- the inner journey, Ms. McClaine and our illustrious former first lady- the outer journey. But this, this is ours!
David: Well, we did have disco.
Steckle: Halloween morning. Rotting pumpkins, burning leaves, black cats mating like rats in the alley. It was as.. it were as if we felt not fear. As if we were already dead, and had nothing to fear by dying. Or perhaps it was because we lived life so well and loved life so much that we imagined ourselves immortal. Overwhelming the powers that be with the force of our passion for science. Or maybe we were just fucked in the head.
Nelson: Well, I'm nice, he's nice, were both fuckin' lunatics. Can I come in please?
Return to the index.
*Dead Poets Society*
Neil: The meek may inherit the earth but they don't get in to Harvard.
Mr. Keating: No, at that time I was not the mental giant that you see before you. I was the intellectual equivalent of a 98 pound weakling. I go to the beach and people would kick copies of Byron in my face.
Mr. Keating: We don't read and write poetry because its cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. And the human race is full of passion. Medicine, law, business, engineering: these are noble pursuits necessary to sustain life but poetry, beauty, romance, love. These are what we stay alive for.
Return to the tahp.
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