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ER
"Stages of Recovery"
Act Three
Scene opens in Nina Pomerantz; office. Carol Hathaway is shifting nervously in
the chair in front of her desk. She is dressed for off duty in jeans, a sweatshirt,
and tennis shoes.
Nina:
What's bothering you, Carol?
Carol (fidgets nervously):
I think I may have pushed Doug too far too fast last night.
Nina:
Pushed him too far? How?
Carol (looks at her feet):
We made love last night...
Nina (brightens...leans forward on the desk...interested):
And?
Carol (shrugs):
I'm not sure he was ready.
Nina:
Did he respond? (Carol nods) Quickly? With coaxing? (motions with her hands)
Help me out, here, Carol...
Carol (grins):
Quickly. No problems there! He just seemed like he was holding back. That's
all. I think he's afraid he'll hurt me. I don't know how to get him past that.
Nina:
Has he ever hurt you?
Carol (shakes her head):
No. He's great. He really is. He's kind...and gentle...very considerate of his
partner...but, I think he feels like he's never gotten rid of his anger over the
attack...
Nina:
Does he have anger from it? Because he never expresses it here.
Carol (nods):
He has anger. I see him sometimes when he thinks no one is watching. He
pounds lockers...steering wheels....doors....I see it. He doesn't know I see
it...but, I do.
Nina:
Well, to calm your first fear, if Doug wasn't ready, he would not have
responded. So, don't worry that you're moving him too fast. I'm sure he can
make up his own mind about that. (She and Carol both chuckle) You and Doug
have been through a lot together, haven't you?
Carol (smiles):
Mark tell you that? (Nina shrugs) Well, the truth is, Doug and I have been just
about as far up and down the ladder with each other as two people could
possibly be. (pauses in thought) But, I kind of like where we are now. We
communicate now. That's something we didn't do much of before. I think we
have more in common with each other now. But, I think he's still afraid to let me
too close to him. Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever know all there is to know
about him.
Nina:
But, you love him? Right?
Carol (nods with a smile):
I honestly do. At least I'm sure of that much. There's just...some times...I still
have doubts in the back of my mind about him. That's judging from the past, I
know, and that's not really fair because Doug has changed a lot...especially
recently...still...sometimes it just slips back. Like the night he was attacked? And
he didn't show up at Carlucci's? Instead of being worried and thinking
something happened, I was mad at him and thinking he just stood me up...
Nina (smiles):
Something he used to do before?
Carol (rolls her eyes):
All the time. Or he'd show up drunk! But, I knew better than that, Nina! I knew
something had to be wrong, yet, I just zeroed in on anger...
Nina (smiles):
To override your fear...perfectly normal. Once you knew something was wrong,
then what?
Carol (laughs lightly):
I spent the night pacing my living room with the phone in my hand waiting for it
to ring.
Nina:
And when you knew what was wrong you were right there beside him every
step of the way. He could have had no doubts in his mind about your concern.
You handled the situation perfectly. Some of it was your training...the rest of it
was your heart.
Carol (smiles):
Thanks, Nina. I think I needed that right now.
Nina:
Have you and Doug talked much about your feelings for each other since you
got back together?
Carol (shakes her head):
Nothing in depth. We've surfaced talked a lot. But, nothing big.
Nina:
We're having a group session tomorrow night...did he mention this to
you?
Carol (nods):
Yeah, he mentioned that Mark was going to be here, too. (Nina nods and makes
a note on the folder in front of her) You think he's ready for that yet?
Nina (looks up and smiles):
I do. I also think he's ready for below the surface conversation with you. I think
you two need to talk a little deeper. And soon. You need to tell him how you
feel and see what kind of feedback you get.
Carol (purses her lips):
Doug is very good at control. Sometimes it's hard to break him open...
Nina (chuckles):
TELL me about! Every time I think I've got him on the edge he finds a strand of
strength to hold back with. But, I'm thinking this group session may be the
answer...
Carol (sighs):
Doug has so many demons...
Nina (nods):
Yes, he does. He has his father...and his son....his love/hate relationship with
Mark...and his past with you. Among other things. But, I honestly think he can
find some way to put them all in place and live a happy life. He has that ability.
He just hasn't found the key yet.
Carol (gathers her jacket and her purse):
Thanks, Nina. Thanks for seeing me on short notice.
Nina (makes a note):
Anytime, Carol. And I'll see you tomorrow.
Cut scene.
Open next scene in Chicago, exterior. Doug and Carol are standing on a walkway near the lake
and just gazing out over the water. We hear the sounds of seagulls and people passing near by
them. Focus on Doug as he leans on the rail and looks out. Cut to show Carol standing close
beside him, also leaning on the rail. She reaches over and touches his shoulder gently. He turns to
her and smiles, reaching for her hand.
Carol (smiles):
You don't jump when I touch you from behind now...that's a good sign.
Doug (grins):
I knew it was you. If we were in a dark parking port, it might have been
different.
Carol:
What are you thinking about?
Doug (shrugs):
Nothing. Everything. I don't know...
Carol:
You're still having nightmares, aren't you? (Doug nods) Well, have you talked to
Nina about them?
Doug (fidgets nervously...looks at his feet):
We talk about so many things...I think I'm just really nervous about this group
session.
Carol (surprised):
Why? It's just Mark! And Me! Is our being there going to cause you problems?
Doug (shrugs):
I don't know. I just have a bad feeling about this. Especially with Mark right
now...
Carol (very surprised):
Why? What's wrong between you and Mark? (Doug doesn't answer...only
shrugs) Are you still upset over your mistake? (Doug glances at his hands but
says nothing) Was Mark angry when he spoke with you?
Doug:
Didn't' seem to be...but he can't let me get by with things like that for long. And
now that it's happened, he'll be watching me even closer.
Carol:
You should talk to him...Mark is your friend...
Doug (cuts her off):
Mark is my boss first...friendship is secondary and it only comes after hours...
Carol (disappointed look):
That's not fair, Doug. Mark goes out of his way to help you in every situation
there is. He knows you're a good person...and a great doctor...he's overlooked
things and you know it. You just want to be angry at someone right now and
he's an easy target for you. That's all.
Doug (grins at her):
I guess you're right...
Carol:
You could be resisting a breakthrough, Doug. This could be the key to your
recovery.
Doug (scoffs):
Breakdown is more like it...
Carol (shakes her head):
No, that's not true. A breakthrough is something that helps you. A breakdown is
just the opposite.
Doug:
Either way you lose control...
Carol:
Well, there's a big difference between losing control in an ER trauma unit where
an innocent life might pay the price and losing control on a nap mat in a shrink's
office in the arms of a couple of close friends. I know which one I'd choose if it
were me. (Doug doesn't answer...just shrugs and continues to look out over the
lake) What are you afraid of? (Doug doesn't answer) Afraid you're gonna come
apart at the seams? You don't want Mark or me to see you cry? (Doug gives her
a hard look, shrugs, and looks back out over the water) It's hard to give up
control, Doug. I know. I had to do that my own self. I had to let go of
everything inside me that was keeping me from progressing forward in my life
and get it out. And it was the scariest thing I've ever done in my life....to let
myself just crumple on the floor in a heap like a rag doll and let down every
guard I ever had. It wasn't easy. But, I knew that if I didn't do it, I was never
gonna get any better. That nothing was gonna change. And the cycle was just
going to start all over again. Is that what you want?
Doug (snaps quickly):
You know it's not...
Carol:
Then you have to change it! And you're the only one who can do it. We can all
help you, but you have to take that first step. I did it. And I was scared. But, it
was OK. I've never been sorry...
Doug (shakes his head):
I was never there for you. I wanted to be...so much...I just didn't know how to
be. Yet, you've been right here with me the whole time... (turns to her) How do
you do that?
Carol (smiles):
I love you. I don't want anything to happen to you and the best way to see that
it doesn't it to just take care of you myself. Nobody ever needed me for
anything before, Doug. It's good to know I can make a difference...
Doug:
You make a difference to people every day...
Carol (nods):
But not to people I love. Are you afraid of love, Doug? (Doug shrugs) You put
this ring on my finger (Carol holds her hand up quickly) And I took that as a
commitment...that you love me...and that you want us to be together...is that
what it means to you?
Doug (hurt expression):
You don't think I love you?
Carol:
That isn't what I asked you. I have no doubts about your feelings for ME. It's
your feelings for our future I might have concerns about right now. Does this
ring represent the same thing to you that it does to me? Or did you just give it to
me because you thought it was what I wanted from you? (Doug doesn't
answer....just lets her hammer away at him) You've changed...a lot...I see it
everyday. But, there's a part of me that wonders if it can last. I guess I just can't
forget some of the past. And I'll tell you this right now, Doug...if I catch you
with another woman, it's over. Completely, and totally. And there won't be
another chance. Ever. I will NOT go through that with you again. Do I make
myself clear in that?
Doug (nods):
If I blow it this time, I wouldn't even ask you for another chance. I only begged
for this one because I felt like things could be different this time.
Carol (leans on the rail with him):
Are you having doubts about that now?
Doug (shakes his head):
No. (looks at her and smiles) After we broke up, you were all I thought about. I
looked for you in every woman I was with. You can ask any of them I was with
about that. They'll all tell you they got tired of hearing about you. (turns to her
and takes her by the shoulders) There's not another woman on this earth that I
want to be with. And no matter what it takes, I will be the man you need me to
be...I am trying with every ounce of strength in my heart to change and it's a
constant, daily fight! But, it's worth it to me if the end result is you. God knows
you deserve better, but, I promise, I'll do everything I can to make you happy.
Carol (wraps her arms around his neck and kisses him sweetly):
You just did. (eyes him with a smile) Everything is gonna be OK...
Doug nods and puts his hand in hers and they start off the boardwalk together.
Fade Act Three to Black.