Cordial Girl
A Marmalade Boy fanfic by Eddie Vagg
Disclaimer: This fanfic was based on character's created by Yoshizumi Wataru, and is not for sale or rent. So please don't sue me.
Authors note: This fanfic totally disregards continuity, it’s a mix of elements from various episodes. I’ve only seen up to episode 20, but be warned, spoilers may lie ahead. Feel free to ignore any spoilers, that may exist, since quite frankly, this is a parody fic. Some of the spoilers will be wildly inaccuate. (of course since the whole series is so predictable, who’s to say if there are ANY real spoilers?)
Any Marmalade Boy fan worth his/her salt will know that Miki is in fact “Mustard Girl”, not “Cordial Girl” Why Cordial Girl?
The first time I ever saw Marmalade Boy was at the Canberra Anime Society, and it was a very hot Summer day. The air conditioning had failed, and it was stinking hot in the screening theatre. To my immense frustration, during the closing credits Miki was happily sipping away at her green/cyan cordial, ice cubes and all!!!
I hated Miki then, and it made an impression on me. As soon as I got home I made myself a BIG glass of green cordial, with lotsa ice. And now I present a fanfic named after the water based drink.
Cordial Girl.
Another typical day in the Koishikawa/Matsuura household. Suitcases sit in the living room, Miki & Yuu’s parents are darting around, looking excited.
Miki comes down the stairs
Yuu: Yo Miki.
Miki: What a great day, I feel fantastic!
Miki sees the suitcases.
Miki: Eh?
Jin: Oh, didn’t we tell you?
Rumi: I thought you were gonna tell them...
Youji: We must have forgotten.
Chiyako: Silly us!
Jin: We’re going on a round the world yaght race!
Miki: YOU CAN’T BE SERIOUS!
Yuu: You finally noticed...
Rumi: It’s gonna be so much fun!
Youji: Don’t worry, we’ll only be away for 6 months.
Jin: We can trust you to take care of yourselves for a while, can’t you?
Miki: But...
Outside, a taxi honks it’s horn.
Chiyako: Oh my!
Youji: We’d better get going.
All four parents gather in tight formation, suitcases in one hand, the other forming a “V” for victory.
All Four: Bye bye!
They leave, leaving Miki and Yuu once again, to fend for themselves.
Yuu: That was quick.
Miki is huffing.
Yuu: Oh? Miki: WHY DO THEY KEEP DOING THIS! THEY ALWAYS GO ON THESE STUPID HOLIDAYS! IT’S JUST NOT FAIR! WHY I’M GONNA....
Yuu: (Pointing out the window) Look! An airplane!
Miki: (turns around) Where!
Yuu: Gotcha. Time for school, lets go.
All of a sudden the background around Miki goes into a crazy swirl of dark colours. Dramatic orchestra music plays, enhancing the moody atmosphere.
Miki: (thinking) Yuu’s changed the subject again! He’s so mysterious. Why does Yuu keep doing that? Does he have a secret? Is he hiding something? Was there really an airplane? Did I miss it? Does it even matter? Am I paranoid?
As usual, Miki’s paranoid mind ranting is interrupted by Yuu’s calm interruption.
Yuu: Anybody home? Hurry up and eat your breakfast, or you’ll be late for school. I’m leaving now.
Miki: Huh? (starts cramming in breakfast) Wait up, Yuu!
Another typical day at school, all the students are sitting at their desks.
Ginta appears to be slightly bothered.
Miki: Ginta? Is something bothering you?
Ginta: I was just thinking...
Miki: Wanna tell me about it?
Ginta: Well... You know how my cousin Tsutomu is always losing bets and shaving his head?
Miki nods affirmitavely.
Ginta: It just occurred to me, we all look so basically similar, if we all shaved our heads nobody would be able to tell us apart!
Miki: Oooohhh!
Yuu: You’re a real thinker, aren’t you?
Ginta: Shut up pretty boy!
Yuu: Oh?
Miki: DON’T FIGHT! If you fight, I’ll cook lunch tomorrow for both of you!
Ginta: Not that! We’ll be good!
Yuu, looking bored, stays quiet.
Namura Sensei comes into the classroom.
Classmate 1: Nacchan’s here!
Classmate 2: He’s such a great teacher!
Meiko is positively glowing.
Namura Sensei: (gazing at Meiko) Hello darling... (Realising mistake) Oh! I mean class!!
Meiko: (sigh)
Miki: (thinking) Nacchan’s a really proffesional teacher. You can tell he really cares about his students.
Namura: O.k. class, today we’re goint to discuss cliche’s in television programs. Can anybody think of any examples?
Meiko’s hand shoots up.
Namura: Yes, Honey?
Meiko: The “forbidden romance”?
Namura: Very good, Dear. Anybody else?
Miki raises her hand.
Namura: O.K, Miki?
Miki: How about “The girl who can’t cook?”
Namura: Ah yes. The epitome of cutesy anime. No series should be without that cliche.
Miki: (giggle) Thank you!
Namura: Alright, who’s next. Yuu?
Yuu just sits there, without a word.
Namura: Ah yes. the silent hero. Any more cliches?
Furutachi: Journalists portrayed as intrusive scavengers?
Miwa: Long-haired popular school captains?
Ginta: The platonic male friend?
Ryoko-Sensei (at doorway, to herself) The lonely spinster...
Chigusa: Minor characters with no personality...
Keiko: And interchangable dialogue?
Namura: (Laughs) Well, I must admit those were all fantastic cliches. Has anybody got any more?
Arimi: The femme fatale?
Miki: Wait a minute...
Ginta: You go to Sagaki Academy...
Arimi: That’s right. I’m just here for a cameo appearance. I’ll be back later though, to stir up more trouble.
The School bell rings, signaling the end of a laughably short lesson.
Namura: Saved by the bell! That’s all folks... See you next time.
Miki: And it just makes me SO ANGRY that my parents all are so irresponsible, leaving me like that!
Meiko: Make the most of it, Miki, you are very lucky!
Miki’s friends, Keiko and Chigusa approach.
Keiko: Hey look, Miki. We’ve been dabbling in black magic, and I think we can predict who your future husband will be!
Miki: No way!
Chigusa: Sure we can. Wanna try it?
Miki: I guess it wouldn’t hurt to try. Ok. Tell me my fortune.
Chigusa: Alright, you asked for it...
Keiko pulls out a container, and unceremoniously dumps some sheep’s intestines on the table.
Keiko: The future’s gotta be in here somewhere...
Miki: (angry) A silly computer game would have been more hygienic!
Chigusa: How about that?
Keiko: Your future husband smells like sheeps guts!
It is now after school, Miki and Yuu are at the Cafe Craps. Miki looks disgusted.
Miki: (spits out cake) YUCK! Now I know why this place is called the “Cafe Craps!”
Yuu: (looking thoughtful) I don’t know... The food here is better than your cooking...
Miki: YOU TAKE THAT BACK!!!! I can cook!
Yuu: So you say...
Miki: I’ll show you! Tonight I’ll cook dinner!
Yuu raises his eyebrows.
Yuu: Oh?
Miki: Don’t look at me like that! I’ll cook well for sure!
Yuu: O.K. (yawns) I didn’t feel like cooking tonight anyway. Besides, you need the practice.
Kijima Takuji, Yuu’s boss at Junk Jungle approaches.
Takuji: Hey Yuu! Are you working today?
Yuu: I’m sorry, I won’t be able to work today. Our parents are out of town for a while, and I’ll have to look after Miki.
Takuji: That’s O.K. I remember when I was your age, and at the same school. You remind me of someone I know...
Yuu: Another story...
Takuji: You don’t have to listen to my sage-like advice... but it could come in handy. Oh well. I’ll see you later, Yuu...
Yuu: See you.
Miki: Bye!
Yuu: It wasn’t necessary for you to buy so much food...
Miki: We need lots of groceries! This isn’t just for tonight you know!
Yuu: I suppose...
Nighttime has fallen, Miki finishes setting up the table for dinner. It is obvious that she has gone to some trouble, the table covered with food! (Miki’s philosophy is to substitute quality for quantity) Candle’s light up the room, and an annoyingly seductive rendition of the Mamalade Boy theme oozes from the Hi-Fi system.
Miki herself is wearing her best dress, and makeup.
Miki: Yuu! You can come down now! Dinner’s ready!
Looking bored as usual, Yuu decends the staircase, and enters the room.
Yuu: You certainly put some effort in this time...
Miki: (blushes) I... I wanted to impress you.
Yuu: (eyes food critically) For your cooking, it looks good.
Miki and Yuu sit, opposite each other at the table.
Miki sighs.
Yuu: Something wrong?
Miki: It just occured to me. When my mother remarries, her surname will be diffrent than mine! She won’t be my mother anymore!
Yuu: That’s silly. When we get married, your surname will change too, and your mother will have the same surname as you again. Don’t be concerned.
Miki: Oh Yuu! (thinking, with psychedelic romantic background) You are so thoughtful. You always know what to say to cheer me up! I love you, Yuu!
Yuu: The weather’s been good lately, hasn’t it?
Miki: (super deformed) WHAT!!!!!! (Thinking, this time with stormy background.) He’s changed the subject AGAIN!!! There must be someone else! Who could it be? Don’t you love me, Yuu?
With convinent timing, the doorbell rings.
Yuu: I’ll get it.
Yuu opens the door to reveal Ginta and Arimi, Arimi is hugging Ginta tightly.
Arimi: Hi! Told you I’d be back!
Yuu: Arimi!
Miki: Ginta!
Arimi: Ginta and I were on a DATE, and just passing by. We thought we’d drop in and announce how happy WE are TOGETHER. Isn’t that right, Ginta?
Ginta: (looking uncomfortable) Uhh...
Arimi: See? We are so happy! It’s not like I’m trying to make you JEALOUS, Yuu. Ginta and I are so much in love!
Tsutomu bursts in, accompanied by his distinctive theme tune.
Ginta: Go shave your head, cousin.
Tsutomu: WHY? I HAVEN’T DISCRACED MYSELF IN PUBLIC YET!!!!
Ginta: You’re discracing yourself right now, as we speak.
Tsutomu: WHAT DISCRACE! THIS IS MY DISTINCTIVE SPEECH PATTERN!!!
Yuu: You don’t always have to shout, you know.
Tsutomu: YES I DO! (turns to Arimi) I’M JEALOUS!!!
Arimi: Great. My cunning plan works on that clown...
Meiko and Namura Sensei arrive.
Namura: Meiko and I were on a date, and just passing by. We thought we’d drop by and...
Everybody looks at the couple, shocked.
Namura: (embarrased) That’s right, we were supposed to keep this secret! Just pretend I’m not here.
Meiko: There’s so much food!
Miki: (more stormy thinking) It wasn’t supposed to be like this! I only cooked dinner for Yuu!
Miwa arrives.
Miwa: Yo Yuu!
Yuu: Miwa!
Miki: (thinking) What’s Miwa doing here! Did Yuu invite him? Are they a couple? THEY’D BETTER NOT BE!
Miwa: Meiko! Hello...
Meiko: I’m already with someone, Miwa. I’m taken.
Namura: But I’m pretending I’m not here for the sake of our future.
Miwa: So you are in effect, “not here”...
Namura: Uh. Yeah.
Miwa: GREAT! Meiko, Let’s date!
Miki: Uh Everybody?
Furutachi arrives, video camera in hand.
Furutachi: What a scoop!
Yuu: Great, the paparazzi.
Furutachi: (filming) Ahh... The freedom of the press! Imagine the scandal!
Miki & Yuu’s parents return, chattering away happily.
Rumi: We’re back!
Youji: You’ll never guess what happened...
Chiyako: Our boat sank...
Jin: And the Royal Australian Navy saved us!
Rumi: It was a close call.
Chiyako: We’re so lucky!
Miki: (shocked) EH?!!!
Jin: (gravely) Now Miki, We didn’t know you were going to hold a party. (breaks into a big grin) IT’S LUCKY WE BROUGHT STREAMERS!!!!
All four parents bring out an assortment of party favors, seemingly out of nowhere!
Youji: Party time!
Chiyako: I’ll get the drinks.
Rumi: Look at all the food! Did you cook this, Miki?
Miki: ....
Rumi: I’m so proud!
Jin: Rumi’s right. You’ve outdone yourself!
Youji: It’s fortunate you cooked so much, Miki.
Chiyako: A toast to the hostess!
Miki: YOU’RE ALL CRAZY!!!!
Obviously upset, Miki rus up to her room and, usual, locks herself in her room.
Chiyako: Oh My!
Rumi: Was it something we said?
Jin: Oh, didn’t we tell you?
Rumi: I thought you were gonna tell them...
Youji: We must have forgotten.
Miki: NOT AGAIN!!!!
The End.