GEORGE BERNARD SHAW


Known today as the person who didn't have enough sense to put music into "My Fair Lady," Mr. Shaw, in his day, was widely quoted.
Today the most widely quoted humorist is either Ziggy or Garfield.



A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself and hates them for it.

Martyrdom is the only way in which a man can become famous without ability.

When we want to read of the deeds that are done for love, whither do we turn? To the murder column.

Fashions, after all, are only induced epidemics.

Heaven, as conventionally conceived, is a place so inane, so dull, so useless, so miserable, that nobody has ever ventured to describe a whole day in heaven, though plenty of people have described a day at the seaside.

When a stupid man is doing something he is ashamed of, he always declares that it is his duty.

A drama critic is a man who leaves no turn unstoned.

The more things a man is ashamed of, the more respectable he is.

I showed my appreciation of my native land in the usual Irish way by getting out of it as soon as I possibly could.

The ideal love affair is conducted by post.

Democracy substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few.

Nowadays a parlour maid as ignorant as Queen Victoria was when she came to the throne, would be classed as mentally defective.