What if the McKenzie Brothers were in Star Wars?
"I's an older code sir, but it checks out eh? I's about to clear 'em, then go get some jellies'"
"I find your lack of faith disturbing, you nob...."
"I think my sight's improving. Before I could only see a dark blur, now I can see a light blur. Too much beer eh?"
"You...and like your hoser father...are now...MINE eh?"
"No...there's another you nob."
"Hey hoser, these blast points -- too accurate for Sandpeople eh? Only Imperial Stormtroopers are so precise."
"And now, young Skywalker...you will die.... so take off!"
"Uh...had a slight weapons malfunction eh? But, uh, everything's perfectly all right now here eh? We're fine. We're all fine here...now...thank you. How are you hoser? Care for a beer?"
"You may fire when ready hosers!"
"The Emperor's not as forgiving as I am you hoser."
"I am NOT a committee eh!"
"You broke Luke's beer... We're doomed!"
"Oh, listen to them, Artoo; they're dying! More beer for us eh?"
"R2D2, you know better than to trust a strange computer you hoser."
"But I's going to go into Toshi Station to pick up some Elsinore and some smokes eh!"
"You came in THAT red van? You're braver than I thought."
"What an incredible SMELL you've discovered! You cut the cheese! You hoser!"
"You don't have to do this to impress me eh?"
"Can someone get this walking carpet out of my way eh?"
"That's impossible eh, even with a computer!"
"Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good beer at your side, kid."
"I bring a gift: these two back-bacons."
"I've decided that we shall stay here eh?"
"Who's the more foolish eh? The fool, or the fool that follows him?"
"Mos Eisley Spaceport. You'll never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. We must be cautious. Plus they sell good beer eh?"
"Do or do not you hoser. There is no try."
"Not entirely stable? Sounds like my brother after a few two-four's eh? I'm glad you're here to tell us these things! Hosehead, take the professor in the back and plug him into the hyperdrive!"
"There's no mystical force that controls MY destiny. Just beer and crullers!"
"If you strike me down you hoser, I will become more powerful than you can possibly imagine! So take off!"
"I'd just as soon kiss a Wookie eh." "I can arrange that you hoser!"
"Never tell me the odds eh!"
"Keep your distance though, Hosehead...but don't LOOK like your tryin' to keep your distance. I don't know eh... fly casual."
"Who's 'scruffy looking' you nob?"
"I don't believe it eh!" "That is why you fail you hoser."
G:Oota-goota,Solo? [Going somwhere you hoser?]
H: Yes,Greedo. As a matter of fact, I was just go to see your boss. Tell Jabba that I've got his money.
G:Soampeeta-lay, Eemal-aitrantee-tachk-ma gee-ghkeet'na. [Jabba just wants to be repaid eh?]
G:Jabbawa-neen-chichko-ka soanoo-eeshah-neetrai-tran-a-ee wan-warooska. hehhehheh
G:Chaskinyawich-yootzoo. [Jabba has sent me to retrieve payment or kill you, you nob! Hehhehheh]
H: Yeah, but this time I got the money.
G:Elchai-yachkoolkain-tai cool-a-coo-soo-a. [So give it to me eh!]
H: I don't have it with me. Tell Jabba...
G:(interupting)Tsee-nahaichee-kee! SochkoolROOLyapoolya-yaool-ra si pachki chka coo-shoo-koo poo-yoo-wa
twee-pee. [Jabba doesn't like people that drink all of his beer while he is away you hoser!]
H: Even I get boarded sometimes. Do you think I had a choice?
G:KTRA! Jabba POO pacoom-PAKni ACHKat AN-pa! [Doesn't matter you nob. I'm taking the money eh!]
H: Over my dead body.
G:Oochlayyoo-ma... [That's the idea!]
G:Chess bookoo-tootachkeest-CHKREN-ko,ya ol-chka. [Now give it to me or take off eh?]