Battle #1
Battle #1: Pikachu, I Choose You!
Player Name: Adam [0-0]
Woohoo! Pokemon League, here I come! I'm gonna catch every Pokemon, win every badge, and become the best trainer on the planet!
OAK: That's what the last fifty kids I gave a Pokemon to said.
Oh, yeah? Well how come they were never featured in a Pokebattle?
OAK: Several of them were!
Look, Professor, are you gonna give me the Pokemon or just bust my chops?
OAK: Okay, okay, go ahead. Choose your Pokemon.
Unless I'm mistaken I get to pick from Charmander, Bulbasaur, or Squirtle.
OAK: You're mistaken. I only have one Pokemon left.
What? That's not what your ad in PokeToday said!
OAK: I gave away all my other Pokemon to greedy little kids like you! Now all I've got left is Pikachu.
Cool, I'll take the rat. I heard of a kid named Ash that got a great Pikachu from you once.
OAK: Well...actually this one is only level 5, but I'm sure he's a fast learner!
You received PIKACHU!
Now, Oak, about my Pokedex...
OAK: Don't worry, I've got one. I'm selling for 12,000 yen.
WHAT?!?
OAK: I know that sounds expensive, but keep in mind that the exchange rate from yen to U.S. dollars is very high.
But...but why are you charging me any money at all?
OAK: You didn't actually think I was doing this out of the kindness of my heart, did you?
I can't afford a Pokedex! I don't have any money!
OAK: Then get out there and earn some, dummy! Oh wait, I forgot...Pokemon trainers don't get paid! Hahaha!
You jerk! I'll show you! I'm going to join the Pokemon League and make a fortune! Then I'm going to buy out your miserable Pokedex company and put you on the streets!
OAK is out of usable Pokemon!
OAK retired!
OAK: Didn't count on that, did ya sonny?
No one calls me sonny!!
Go! PIKACHU!
OAK: Hey! You can't fight me!
And why is that?
OAK: You have no Pokedex! Without it you can't tell how much HP your Pokemon has, what it's attacks are, or anything!
Er...maybe you're right...but I still have one Pokemon to your none, so I'll risk it!
OAK sent out OAK!
Hit him, Pikachu!
PIKACHU used HIT!
Not with your paws, with lightning! Man, that Pokedex would sure come in handy right now.
OAK used KICK!
PIKACHU fainted! Use next Pokemon?
It fainted ALREADY?? WHAT A PIECE OF...wait, Adam, wait. Get a grip. I can take care of an old man.
The enemy's weak! Get'm ADAM!
Look behind you! A totally undiscovered Pokemon! It's really impressive and will make you a respect Pokemon research scientist only if you turn and look at it RIGHT NOW!
OAK fell for it!
ADAM used SUCKER PUNCH!
Critical hit!
Yes! Cower before my Pokemon mastery! ...although, technically my fist isn't a Pokemon, now that I think about it.
OAK: You can laugh now, Adam, but I'll be back! And I shall have my revenge!!
OAK used TELEPORT!
OAK TELEPORTED away!
What a loser. Damn fine inventor, though.
ADAM stole a Pokedex!
Now I'm ready to start a true Pokemon journey! Right, Pikachu...Pikachu?
PIKACHU is still fainted, you knob!
Oh no! My only Pokemon is out cold! Now I'd better steal some girl's bike, ride to a Pokemon Center, and get my small companion cured. That's what the plot summary says, anyway! Seeya in battle #2!