A lawyer got married to a woman who had previously been married 10 times.
On their wedding night, they settled into the bridal suite at their hotel and the bride said to her new groom, "Please, promise to be gentle. I am still a virgin."
This puzzled the groom, since after 10 marriages, he thought that at least one of her husbands would have been able to perform. He asked his new bride to explain the phenomenon. She responded
"My first husband was a Sales Rep who spent our entire marriage telling me, in grandiose terms, 'It's gonna be great!'"
My second husband was from Software Services; he was never quite sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he would send me documentation.
My third husband was from Field Services and constantly said that
everything was diagnostically OK, but he just couldn't get the system up.
My fourth husband was from the Telemarketing Department and said that he had the orders, but he wasn't quite sure when he was going to be able to deliver.
My fifth husband was an Engineer. He told me that he understood the basic process but needed three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
My sixth husband was from Finance and Administration. His comments were that he knew how, but he just wasn't sure whether or not it was his job.
My seventh husband was a Marketing Manager. He said, 'I know I have the product. I'm just not sure how to position it.'
My eighth husband was a psychiatrist, and all he ever wanted to do was talk about it.
My ninth husband was a gynaecologist, and all he ever wanted to do was look at it.
My tenth husband was a stamp collector, and all he ever wanted to do was...
-- God I miss him!
So now I've married a lawyer, I know I'm definitely going to get screwed...
