Don't Mess With Mom!
My son came home from school one day
With a smirk upon his face
He decided he was smart enough
To put me in my place
"Guess what I learned in Civics Two
That's taught by Mr. Wright?"
It's all about the laws today
The "Children's Bill Of Rights"
It says I need not clean my room
Don't have to cut my hair
No one can tell me what to think
Or speak, or what to wear
I have freedom of religion
And regardless what you say
I don't have to bow my head
And I sure don't have to pray
I can wear earrings if I want
And pierce my tongue and nose
I can read and watch just what I like
Get tattoos from head to toe
And if you ever spank me
I'll charge you with a crime
I'll back up all my charges
With marks on my behind
Don't you ever touch me
My body's only for my use
Not for your hugs and kisses
That's just more child abuse
Don't preach about your morals
Like your Mamma used to do
That's nothing more than mind control
And that's illegal too!
Mom, I have these children's rights
So, you can't influence me
Or, I'll call Children's Services Division
Better know as "C.S.D"
I mulled it over carefully
I couldn't let this go
A smile crept upon my face
He's messing with a pro
Next day I took him shopping
At the local Goodwill store
I told him, "Pick out all you want"
There's shirts and pants galore
I've called and checked with C.S.D
Who said they didn't care
If I bought you K-Mart shoes
Instead of Nike Airs
I've cancelled that appointment
To take your drivers test
The C.S.D is unconcerned
So, I'll decide what's best
I said, "No time to stop and eat
Or pick up stuff to munch
And tomorrow you can start to learn
To make your own sack lunch
Just save that raging appetite
And wait till dinner time
We're having liver and onions
A favorite dish of mine
He asked "Can I please rent a movie
To watch on my VCR?
"Sorry, but I sold your TV
For new tires on my car
I also rented out your room
You'll take the couch instead
The C.S.D requires
Just a roof over your head
Your clothing won't be trendy now
I'll choose what we will eat
That allowance you used to get
Will buy me something neat
I'm selling off your jet skis
Dirt bike, and roller blades
Check out the "Parents Bill Of Rights"
It's in effect today
Hey hot shot are you crying?
Why are you on your knees?
Are you asking God to help you out
Instead of C.S.D?
From your loving Mom
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