David is the greatest person in this whole entire world. Every night I dream that when I wake up in the morning I have actually become the one and only master of the world, David Herbert. He is the absolute greatest, and he is just completely fenominal at everything that he does (except possibly spelling, I mean after all, he is the second worst speller in the world right behind Jimi). In conclusion, whenever he decides the you are worthy enough to be graced with his pressance, you should fall right to your knees, divert your eyes, and throw all the money that you have in your pockets to him, for 'tis money that is the only thing that can appease him. -Anonymous
David Herbert is the best doorstop I ever owned. -Robert Umphlet
David Herbert is such a pain, I mean he can't help it if he's gay...well actually he probably could. He's someone you would meet on an airplane going to Alaska, dressed for Florida wheather, in fact with a plane ticket to Florida. He's not the smartest guy in the world, or the State, or the city, or the neighborhood, or the...well his IQ is the amount of change that's in my pocket...no wait, I've got five cents. -Mr. Coolguy(Jimi Doss)
David Herbert- he puts a smile on your face and a warm fuzzy in your- what? Oh, that David Herbert. The short one. Good for yard work. -Courtney Griffin
Dave is.........well.....Dave...um....not much to say about him except that he has three nipples. And they all seem to be staring at you all the time...like a picture on a wall...just staring no matter where you move....it's really scary. -Jimmy Thomson
David is the kind of guy who's name needs to be pronounced with a lowered voice and I, of course, always give him that courtesy. Even though I am bent on evil, I like David... Everyone likes David... And if you don't like David you are sure to find a quick but painful death by my hand. -Ryan Johnson
Jimi Doss is the greatest thing that ever happened to this world, I mean look at what he's done for the great State of Virginia. He's so awesome. I think I can write all day about how cool he is...in fact I think I will. let's see he's good, better, best, satisfactory, salutary, considerable, desirable, well-behaved, kind, virtuous, well, good-hearted, fun to be with, good-looking, sweet, distinctly, pleasing, charming, having a favorable outcome or an unforeseen or unpredictable success, and finally 100% AMERICAN. -Anonymous
Jimi Doss is a loser, who's too scared to call girls, and he's a whiney, little brat whose arrogant, annoying and sometimes just plain stupid. Now, enough about his good points, let's talk about facts. Without Jimi we wouldn't have had anything to film with...no, wait that's his mother. Well without him we wouldn't have any costumes...no, that was his mother again. Let's see props, mum, set, mum, funds, mum, food, mum. Well, um, without Jimi we wouldn't have a third person. Plus we need someone with a lot of free time and that's him. So I guess, technically we couldn't do it without him, and his mum. -Robert Umphlet
I really do believe that Jimi is gay, not that there's anything wrong with that, but you should see how he cums onto me. I mean he's just not right. That's alright though, he's still like a brother to Robert and I, we pretty much live here at his house, and his Mom now even shops for us and makes us do chores, such as make our beds, or sofas, which is usually the case. Also this one last thing, like a brother, he can be very annoying, I mean he just won't let it sink into his head that I'm always right, and he's always wrong. -David Herbert
Have you ever met a guy who just charms his way into your heart? And you went through your day thinking of only that guy, and how sweet he is, and his smile, and you're so happy and giddy, and then your bastard math teacher gives you a failing grade? Well, Jimi's like that math teacher. -Courtney Griffin
I was told by Jimi Doss himself to say really nice things about him...but he can forget that..I won't say anything at ALL about him................................................................ -Jimmy Thomson
Although Jimi is a tall guy, he is easily manipulated. I can smell his fear of me every time I look into his eyes. It is kind of pathetic, but I like having complete control over him. I still hate it when he sings "O Canada." -Ryan Johnson
Robert Umphlet is perhaps the most brilliant actor ever to grace the earth. He is a genius, S.T.C. would probably be nothing without him. He could achieve any task placed before him. If every person in the world could have just a modicum fraction of his intellect this world would be a better place to live. He can even do impersonations I mean look at the picture. For a second I thought it was really Elvis. This just goes to show that he deserves the nickname of dog...sorry thats just my dislexia..god, that his friends have dubbed him. Robert is a delight to keep company with, he is a ladies man, he is your and my lord and master. Every house hold should own one. So in conclusion I Just want to say, LONG LIVE S.T.C. -Anonymous
Robert Umphlet is perhaps the most brilliant actor ever to grace the earth. He is a genius, S.T.C. would probably be nothing without him. He could achieve any task placed before him. If every...Wait a minute, that's not how I think he is. I think he's a low life scum that you'd find in a can of green beans thats been sitting in one position for about three thousand years two months and six days. He's somebody that you wouldn't want your daughter to meet or your son for that matter. Then again he isn't all that bad. I mean he's a little strange at times, but I've learned to live with that...I guess. Sure, we can call him god...sorry thats just my dislexia...dog, but he's one of the greats at what he does, what ever that may be. -Jimi Doss
Robert is perhaps too smart for his own good, either that or he's good at faking it. If it wasn't for him we could have never gotten off the ground as a group, not that we are completely off the ground or anything, but he did get us started and now look at us, because of him designing this site, information about us is being sent to all the corners of this round earth. Actually I think that he isn't as great as everyone thinks he is, though he is known as "God", but that's not the point, when you've known him for as long as I have, you learn to just ignore what is on the outside of a person and try to find out exactly what is on the inside, literally, I have tryed to dissect him on many occasions but he usually wakes up right about the time the knife pierces his skin. -David Herbert
Robert? Who's Robert? Didn't he deliver pizza to us once? -Courtney Griffin
Robert was the only guy who ever made me laugh, he always had a drunkin smile on his face (even though he was not drinking) and made jokes all night long. His sence of humor was never ending, he was an inspiration to us all....too bad he died... Dibs on his CD's!! (Warning: Robert Umphlet Is Still Alive Today...All Personal Objects Taken From Him Must Be Returned Imediatly!) -Jimmy Thomson
Robert sucks. He has never even once said one nice thing to me. This, however, is irrelevant as I am going to sacrifice him. -Ryan Johnson
Jimmy is a normal guy, he has a normal job and a normal life. Nothing unordinary about this man...except at night when the gangs emerge from their hiding spots and terrorize inocent citizens. Then this normal guy puts on his cape and cowl and appears out of nowhere to fight the wrong doers. All people Praze the name of Jimmy! They come from far and wide to see this marvel of society. But when you look threw all the fame and power and popularity and superness, he's really just an adverage guy. -Anonymous
Let me tell you a story about how we discovered Jimmy. You see it all started back in high school. We were watching a play and we started talking to each other about what an excellent job this one actor was doing. And we thought about asking him to join our group. So we decided that we would follow him back stage. Finally, when we got back there he was swarmed with fans asking for autographs and what not. You know like we get nowadays. And we got to ask this fantastic actor to join, but he just laughed. So David said what about this other guy and I said ok so we hit him over the head and dragged him home. Where we made him watch our movies and watch the discovery channel and solve complex equations. And that's how I discovered cold fusion. And the moral of this story being never underestimate the power of the discovery channel.-Robert Umphlet
Jimmy Thomson is one of the.....
Jimmy Thomson is- never mind- Jimi just asked me to go to bed w/ him....... -Courtney Griffin
.....Wait I just got Courtney's anwser. Maybe some other time Jimmy, huh? -Jimi Doss
Jimmy is one of the strangest people I've ever given birth to. He came out looking like a dead cow. No wait that was his twin. -David Herbert
Jimmy likes pizza, I like pizza. Coincidence? I think not. -Ryan Johnson
Courtney Griffin is, without a doubt, the greatest thing to happen to the STC. Before, they were sad little lonely boys who had yet to even speak to a girl. And now they still have no friends besides her but that's OK cuz she believes in the importance of charity and tries to help out the poor pathetic creatures. But her generosity hardly compares to her beauty and intelligence. She is simply the epitome of loveliness in every way.-Anonymous
Courtney? Who's Courtney? I don't know no Courtney.-Robert Umphlet
Griffin? Griffin....ah yes the new guy, He's pretty funny. I think he's a rising star in the S.T.C, maybe one day he'll be just like me....What? Oh! he's a she, well I hope she does good here then....are you sure, she's a she? -Jimi Doss
Courtney's actually a very sweet girl, when she's not either trying to steel her underwear back or just being a complete bitch. -David Herbert
The only real reason that she's with us is so Jimi might actually get some, she's not talented, she's not funny, and can't think of ANYthing humorus to add to the group. She's a dead weight to us all, and if it weren't for Jimi's raging hormones, we'd ditch her on the curb where we found her, but if we did do that, Jimi would more then likely screw us all! I shudder to think of it. -Jimmy Thomson
Courtney is the most beautiful creature to have graced God's Earth. I think I shall kill her. -Ryan Johnson
I'll just pretend that I'm Ryan so as to make typing this anonymous letter easier. I am a being of ultimate power. It's not that I'm evil, I just use evil energy to become stronger. And a little off subject, if I ever see Bob Evans, I think I'll shake his hand and burn down his resteraunt. -Anonymous
Uh... There's not much to, uh, say about him. He, uh, doesn't seem to be too bright a kid. I mean look at the picture. The boy's not right. Why not strap him to the back of a drunken mule and through ball bearings at him till he pukes. I mean if he's gonna hang around humping your leg you might as well put him to good use. Or so I've heard.-Robert Umphlet
Ryan is strange, if I wasn't afraid he'd kill me, I'd tell him to piss off. -Jimmy Thomson
Ryan, I truely believe will be one of those psycho's and I think about ten years from now, that he'll be on the news for blowing up some famous building. Then he'll go to prison and meet a guy named Willy Magee, that who can bend you over in three. It just doesn't look good in the future for one Ryan Johnson, I mean look who he's with now. -Jimi Doss
Ryan is one weird son of a bitch. He's crazy. If you can get away with not having to meet him, you're lucky. For those of us who did meet him, please pray for out soals. He's really not that bad of a person if you don't get him on one of his screaming frenzies-David Herbert
David Herbert- David currently attendes Barton College in Wilson, NC. He co-produces a skit comedy show titled "Something" with Jimmy Thomson.
Jimi Doss- Doss now lives in L.A. with his lovely wife Erica, and has a little one on the way. He attends Columbia College of Hollywood, and is a teacher's assistant for a grade school out there. He is also part of a skit comedy group known as "3:50"
Jimmy Thomson- Thomson lived with Doss in L.A. for a while then moved back to Chesapeake. He's co-producing the show "Something" with David.
Robert Umphlet-I think he's in Texas, haven't heard from him since christmas 1999. At that time he and his wife Erin were living in Monteray, CA. He's in the Air Force.
Ryan Johnson- Last I heard was he now live in Pittsburg and attends an art school.
Courtney Griffin- still in high school, and want's nothing to do with Jimi or David (I think we finally over did it and truly pissed her off). but I hear she's doing well.
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