THE WONDER BOY YEARS Series Guide REVISED 5/2/97 Walt Disney Television Animation Before our 65 episodes there was... The Man. The Myth. The Movie. Which goes something like this: The gospel-singing narrators of the film, the MUSES, pop off the crockery to sing the heroic tale of HERCULES. The birth of Herc set Mt. Olympus rocking! What a party! Even at the home of the gods, this is an EVENT! ZEUS and HERA, rulers of Mt. Olympus, present their gurgling godling with a winged baby horse named PEGASUS. An A-list of immortals looks on in delight: POSEIDON, ATHENA, ARES, BACCHUS, APRHODITE, HEPHAESTUS and HERMES. The mood darkens when HADES, god of the Underworld, arrives to pay his "disrespects." Hades hates being in charge of a bunch of deadbeats, and he hates Zeus for giving him that assignment for eternity. He plans a hostile takeover of Mt. Olympus. But can baby Hercules spoil his plan? Only the Fates, three crones who see past, present, and future through the one eyeball they share, know the answer. When Hades taps the Fates for the information, he's in for the shock of his immortal life. He finds out that even with the help of the monstrous Titans, one thing stands between him and his co-opting of the Cosmos -- Hercules! Hades sends his evil minions, PAIN and PANIC, to do his dirty work. These two groveling morph-masters kidnap the baby, whisk him off to Earth, feed him a mortal-making baby formula and kill him...or do they? Half-mortal, half-god, Herc is raised by his adoptive Earth parents, ALCMENE and AMPHITRYON. He grows into a gawky adolescent with superhuman strength that he can't control. A misfit torn between two worlds. Shunned by everyone except his Earth parents, Herc goes to the Temple and prays to a statue of Zeus for guidance. When the statue comes to life and becomes the real Zeus, he tells Herc of his true heritage. Hercules is overjoyed. No wonder he never fit in. He belongs on Mt. Olympus. WRONG! Only gods can live on Mt. Olympus. For the half-mortal Hercules to rejoin the gods, he must become a TRUE HERO. So, reunited with his old pal, Pegasus, Herc heads off to find PHILOCTETES, the trainer of heroes. With nothing but sheer determination and a bolt of lightning from his immortal father, Herc coaxes "Phil," a disgruntled satyr, to come out of retirement and train him for herodom. With Herc's awesome strength finally in focus, Phil takes his boy to Thebes for a tryout. Plagued by earthquakes, fires, floods and monsters, Thebes is a city in need of a hero. Along the way, Herc encounters the fiercely independent and beautiful MEGARA, a damsel in distress. Meg is being held captive by a biker-dude Centaur named NESSUS. Herc dispatches Nessus with ease. Once Meg is saved, he flies off towards Thebes -- obviously smitten. Unfortunately, Meg is on Hades' team. Hades is less than thrilled to hear Hercules is still around, forcing him to concoct another plan. Back in Thebes, the townspeople are underwhelmed by Phil's latest protege. But Herc gets a chance to prove himself when he defeats the Hydra, a beast that grows three heads for each one Hercules chops off. Hercules becomes a star. There's nothing he can't handle. The Erymanthian Boar! The snake-haired Medusa! The A-mazing Minotaur! Fame and fortune are his. Statues are carved in his honor. Products are licensed in his name. Hercules is ready for Mt. Olympus. WRONG! Zeus tells him that being famous isn't the same thing as being a True Hero. And Hades is burning mad. With only twenty-four hours left to put his plans into action, time is running out. Hades tells Meg if she can discover Hercules weakness, he'll set her free forever. Meg convinces Hercules to escape his fans for an afternoon tryst. The two ramble hand-in-hand. They talk. They kiss. They fall in love. It's easy for Hades to see that Hercules' only weakness is Meg. So, Hades slithers in with a deal. If Hercules gives up his strength for one day, Meg will be safe from harm forever. Hercules agrees, only to be crushed to find out the truth about Meg. His path clear, Hades snaps into action. He releases the Cyclops and the powerful Titans - Rock, Lava, Ice and Tornado - and they storm off toward Mr. Olympus howling "DESTROY ZEUS!" The Cyclops is sent off on a Hercules-killing mission. Hercules has no strength and no desire to fight back until Phil and Meg rekindle his belief in himself. During Herc's fight with the Cyclops, Meg is hurt. This invalidates Hades' contract and Herc gets his strength back. Fully revitalized, Herc storms off to Mr. Olympus. He arrives in time to destroy the Titans and save the Pantheon of Olympian gods. He rushes back to Earth to find that Meg is dead. Enraged, Herc descends into the Underworld to get Meg back. Without thought for himself, Herc dives into a whirling river of souls to exchange his life for his beloved's. This selfless act of bravery restores Herc's godhood and makes him a True Hero. The gates of Mt. Olympus open. Gods and goddesses welcome Hercules home. But Hercules chooses to stay on Earth with Meg, now knowing it's with her that he really belongs. THE END Well, not exactly... The Series In regards to the original film, think of our series as a "mid-quel." Our Herc is that somewhat gawky, but still super-strong kid, trying to find his place in the world. At this stage of the game, Herc knows that Zeus and Hera are his parents, and he knows that the only way to rejoin them on Mount Olympus is to becomes a true hero. He has convinced Philoctetes to be his "personal trainer," to lead him on the path to herohood. And that is the foundation of our series -- Herc's journey from "zero to hero." This area is pretty much covered in the movie by one song montage of Phil whipping his student into shape. So obviously we're going to need some serious embellishment. Hercules is a demi-god -- half god, half mortal. He's got one foot in both worlds and so does our show. Each episode will feature the most outrageous, larger than life adventures a wannabe hero can face. But if you strip away the amped-up action and epic mythology, you have a journey that everybody takes. The journey from adolescence to adulthood. Thus, we have our subtitle, "The Wonderboy Years." Seriously. Imagine "The Wonder Years" if Kevin could have dumped the incessant narrator in favor of some really cool monsters. Much better, right? It's a loopy hybrid, but, to quote the Boss (Bruce Springsteen, not some stiff in a suit) -- "Mama, that's where the fun is." Here's the recipe for a prototypical tasty Hercules story-- ADVENTURE Hercules is on a mission to prove himself as a hero. Hades and other Underworld types are determined to see him fail. Cue the monsters! No foe is too outlandish. No situation is too over the top. The key word is EXTREME! A good example is the point in the movie where Herc is swallowed by the Hydra and, just when we think he's a goner, he cuts his way out, lopping the beast's head off in the process. That's an extreme approach to an old scene. All of the action in the movie is big, bold and cartoony. Within the guidelines of broadcast standards, we'll pursue a similar take no prisoners attitude and throw it all at our boy Herc. Being the strongest man on earth, no challenge is too great. Except, one-- GROWING UP We'll parallel our fantastic plots with very earthbound complications. Herc may be able to thrash a Nemean Lion, but he can't avoid the universal hurdles of adolescence. We want to ground his heroic journey in a way that is appealing and meaningful to our audience, so we'll play off of the "misfit" aspect of Herc that was portrayed in the first act of the feature. Much of this will take place at school, a new setting featured in our series. There, Hercules struggles to fit in amongst the teenaged likes of Adonis, Helen of Troy and Alexander the Pretty Good and Getting Better All the Time. Luckily he does fall in with a couple of other outcasts, Cassandra and Icarus to form a tight friendship. Lest you think the series is only mean action and teen angst, shot through everything is an all important emphasis on -- COMEDY Actually, more like -- COMEDY You'll laugh so hard your head will split open and a love goddess will spring forth! This is what will set us apart from certain New Zealanders on a legendary journey. As in the feature, the biggest action beat will still have laughs. Even the poignant moments will hinge on a slightly irreverent twist. A recurring comic convention will come in the culture clash between the uptight Narrator and the loose Muses. They interrupt each other to tell the story in their own way. The Muses and the musical moments they add is another asset that will separate us from all other myth series. We'll explore in-depth the social satire that the feature could only touch upon. As Thebes was a Grecian stand-in for New York City, we'll find like gags all over the map. The Agora is familiar to any kid who's hung out in the mall. Sparta is the ultimate in military cold war paranoia. The island of the Lotus Eaters could parody our on beloved Los Angeles. Abacus Valley is the last word in high tech. In our mythology, Sirens don't lead sailors to crash on rocks, but they do lure them onto a Vegas-like island that features the swanky Circe's Palace. We're looking for comic density here. Go for the throwaway gags. Maybe we'll see "Men in Black Togas," investigating the parking lot of the Chariots of the Gods -- Officially known as "Area LI." If our guys have to answer the riddle of the sphinx, he'll be an obnoxious game show host -- "Sphinx Martindale." The Delphic Oracles have gone commercial too, now they're the Oracle Friends Network. The school's military faction is known as "The Spar-O.T.C." The cool kids think Herc is a real "doric." And you can guess where the jokes come from with such guests as "Thesaurus, Euphemism, Parentheses, Pentium and Contagious." Of course, the best and brightest laughs will not come from scenery and spot gags but from the same source as the original Greek comedies -- the characters. The Characters HERCULES Hercules is a teenager, 'round about sixteen years old. He is a demi-god, which is Ancient Greek for "mortal with super-strength." The bottom line -- Herc is an ordinary kid with extraordinary powers. Now, he also has chosen an extraordinary path in life. He's in training to become a hero, but along the way he'll have the same feelings, foibles and follies that all kids have. In the arena of hero prep, he's in good hands with Philoctetes, the trainer of heroes. Let's face it, though, Phil's pretty lucky too. This kid's a good candidate for rookie of the year. For starters, the super-strength is a plus for any future hero. But more important than that, this kid's got heart. Herc is determined to achieve his long term goal of herohood. No matter how much Phil puts him through during hero training, Herc gives 110%! No slacker Herc, he pushes himself hard. Sometimes too hard. He can make himself stumble, when his enthusiasm and eagerness overpower his skill and experience. In the arena of "ordinary kid" stuff, Herc is more on his own. The movie showed us that his "freakish" strength made him an outcast from other kids his own age during his childhood. So even though he's a teenager during our series, he is a little backward compared to his peers. His hero skills may need work, but his social skills are really hit and miss. That's okay, though. That trademark Hercules 110% kicks in here too. In both aspects of his life, Herc may falter and even fail, but he never gives up. Ah, such determination... Herc sounds like a good kid, huh? Well, that's only the beginning. He's honest, trustworthy, loyal... Yep. He's the proverbial boy scout. He cannot lie, not even a little white lie. He cannot resist a cry for help. Heck, he may not even wait for the cry for the help. He's blindly optimistic about the world. He knows how he thinks and operates, and he presumes everybody else does likewise. Please don't think the kid's stupid. He's not. He's just way too trusting and naive. The good news for us is that we get stories, scenes and jokes from these experiences that open his eyes. And just to mix it up, sometimes his optimistic expectations may even be right on target, then it'll be Phil's cynical eyes that are opened. Sweet and nice could get boring, but Hercules does have a few juicy faults. Most noticeable is his firm "leap before you look" policy. It probably has something to do with his Olympian hormones, but this kid is just too damn eager. Also, his will of iron is matched by his fists of steel. And in spite of Herc's extreme goodness, he does have a temper. Or maybe it's because of his extreme goodness. Whether it's in response to a large injustice or a small dirty trick, his outrage ignites an impulse to action. Then again, maybe he gets it from his dad Zeus, who has been known to hurl a thunderbolt or two in his rage. Okay. Let's review. Hercules is a wide-eyed, innocent kid, who eagerly and doggedly struggles to achieve his goal -- to become a true hero. He always tries do the right thing himself, and he'll take on anybody who's doing the wrong thing. PHILOCTETES You can call him Phil. He's Herc's trainer, mentor, confidant and lawn mower. Yeah, he's half goat. What of it? He's a little sensitive about his animal, uh, magnetism. Street smart, tough and billy goat gruff around the edges, we sense it's all part of his game face. Inside, he clearly has a soft spot for his boy but he takes his hero training job too seriously to allow himself to get all warm and fuzzy -- except from the waist down. Phil's a great coach, but he's had a run of bad luck -- Odysseus, Perseus, Theseus and Achilles all let him down in the clutch. Eager to escape past mistakes, he's tough on Herc and brutal on himself. His motives are pure, but he's suspicious of everyone else's. He'd like Herc to stay sequestered on his island until he deems him ready for action. But once Herc catches the school barge for class, his eyes are on a big world and Phil knows his job just got tougher. Luckily, Phil seems to have a rule for every situation -- "Rule #68. Always stop, look and listen before crossing the river styx." Phil is far from perfect. There is, what the media would call "the nymph issue." He's a horny little guy. As dedicated as he is to Herc and his cause, one glance at a water Nerieid and he's liable to leave his student high and dry. He hates himself for it later, but he can't help himself. His satyr ways have also left many flickering old flames around and about. Some might harbor dangerous grudges that would complicate an otherwise straightforward task. Pegasus and Phil are united in their dedication to Herc, so the winged horse often finds himself a sounding board for Phil to vent his frustrations when Herc's training goes on yet another detour. But if Herc gets in over his head, the duo is the first to help bail him out. It's important to keep in mind that our series spans the formative period in Herc and Phil's relationship. They're not buddies on an equal footing. Phil is a coach and the majority of the time we'll keep the relationship on that semi-formal basis so that those rare times when he is a pal will seem even more special. PEGASUS Best bud and sparring partner to Herc since birth, this winged stallion is fiercely loyal. He was made that way. This leads to a streak of jealousy whenever his buddy's affections are focused elsewhere. As Zeus points out in the feature, Pegasus has the brain of a bird to go along with his wings. He even eats seeds and worms. Beneath his sleek exterior, he's actually the ultimate dumb jock stereotype. He likes head butting. He'll match Hercules' exuberance and take it a few laps beyond good sense. Because of this, Herc finds himself bailing out Pegasus even more than the horse helps him. Pegasus doesn't speak, but he does make a combo tweet/whinny that gets across the depth of his feelings nicely. On the practical front, Pegasus gives Herc and his buddies fast, reliable transportation to just about anywhere they need to go. The downside is that he does stick out in a crowd, so Herc generally leaves him back on the island when he goes to school. ICARUS The court of peer group public opinion has judged Icarus and found him to be WEIRD. Although our series will brim over with fantastic, unreal phenomenon, teen life will not suddenly become fair. In spite of all his efforts, Icarus will remain an outcast and not be able to shake his Greek geek label. The simple explanation for his cloud cuckoo attitude is that the boy "flew too close to the sun." His hair is fried, but it goes deeper than that. Like to his brain. Where Hercules is a straight arrow, Icarus is bent. They're both misfits in High School, but since Herc is the new kid, Icarus seizes the opportunity to come off as the expert to someone with even less social standing. Naturally, his "expert" advice comes in two flavors, wrong and dangerously wrong. Icarus and Herc, along with the brooding Cassandra, form an unlikely trio of high school friends. While Herc's optimism and Cassandra's pessimism are natural extremes in point of view, we add Icarus to provide the unnatural extreme. He's loopy, unpredictable and a thrill junkie. The wax wings were just the beginning. When it comes to wild stunts, Icarus has the will. He also has the way. His father is Daedelus, the legendary craftsman/inventor of Greek lore. Those wings we discussed? One of his best inventions, except for the whole melting wax thing. The Minotaur's labyrinth? That was one of his. He's even taken on some real hush-hush projects for Sparta's industrial-military complex. Icarus has some wacky/dangerous stuff at his disposal, and, of course, he never pays attention to "Dad-alus's instructions and/or warnings." Icarus is truly, madly, deeply in love with Cassandra. Accent on the "madly." And even though Cassandra answers his honey with acid, beneath her sarcasm she is protective of her goofy paramour. What does Phil think of Herc's new friend? "I got two words kid: drop him like a bad habit." He sees Icarus's try-anything-once attitude as the ultimate risk to his careful training regimen. But we'll probably have Icarus save Phil's tail early on so the coach is forced to tolerate him, even as he still skewers him with sarcastic asides. We confess: Icarus is our gimmick character. Since Herc is so gosh darn positive and Cassandra so charmingly negative, Icarus has to carry a lot of comic weight on his scrawny little shoulders. If you were a TV executive and not an writer we'd say he's our Kramer/Reverend Jim/Urkle/Fonzie/Lenny and/or Squiggy. Rolled into one and voiced by French Stewart. CASSANDRA Rounding out Herc's school trio, Cassandra gives us a sour counterpoint to all of the gonzo testosterone. She has the dubious gift of seeing into the future. What's not clear is which came first -- her predictions of doom or her personality of gloom. She'll see the downside to any possible adventure, though her warnings are wrapped in such a resigned sigh, she's generally ignored. Pale and lanky, she wears her outsider status like a badge of honor. Perhaps seeing the future has given her the ability to see beyond high school ("He's pretty cocky for a guy that will spend the rest of his life as a Speedy Pita assistant manager.") but her wry detachment adds a note of maturity to the group. Herc treasures her company and her opinion. She's the only girl that doesn't cause him to put his sandal in his mouth. She has a sense of mission with Herc, as she's one of the few people who believes in what is viewed by his classmates as a wonky hero quest. Maybe it's that "seer" thing again. Maybe it's that someone who is so generally negative needs to find something to believe in. Whichever, she softens considerably in her unguarded moments around Hercules. In spite of, or maybe because of, Cassandra's acerbic surface, she should emerge as one of the most likable characters on the show. She says what we all wish we could say. Her put-downs are perceptive and funny, never cruel. As voiced by Sandra Bernhard, she's our smartest and thus most verbally humorous regular character. We quickly get that her detached observer attitude is a protective pose more than a conviction. Plus when the school trio gets in grave danger, she stays calmer than Icarus. Speaking of her "stalker," as she describes Icarus, Cassandra has a strange relationship with the little guy. We get the feeling that having Herc in the picture has notched down her blatant hostility toward the little weirdo. Maybe we'll even discover that she kind of likes him. Though this will come out only in deeds, she'd never say that out loud. Phil is a little spooked by Cassandra since she knows way too much for comfort, but he figures that her words of caution are a life saving counter to Icarus's lack of caution. PROMETHEUS ACADEMY This school is our home base away from the home base at Phil's island. Our school is a quite pleasant conglomeration of classical architecture set atop a seaside bluff, hard by Athens proper. It has everything found in a modern high school, but with a our oddball classical twist. There are several stock locations: CLASSROOMS - These outdoor, amphitheater-style classes will come in small and large, depending on our story needs. This is where are eager students sit, drinking up knowledge, taking detailed notes with their stylus and wax tablets, asking pertinent, well phrased questions. But seriously... Even with our fantastic setting, this is school as we know it. Where a drool dripping student stares longingly at the class sundial, waiting for lunch. Which brings us to-- THE CAFETERIUM - A buffet line that features live grape vines for plucking and live goats for milking leads to a dining hall segregated by classes. The upper-class literally lounges on a balcony above, where couches and servants await. The lower level, where our trio chow down is a more humble self serve and benches affair. THE "QUAD" - This is our basic, all purpose area. Lots of steps and colonnades to lend interest to "walking and talking" scenes. The center is dominated by a huge statue of Prometheus himself surrounded by plenty of green to soften all of that marble. ( CLASSMATES Prometheus Academy is attended by Greece's best and brightest. Like all schools, there's the out crowd (whom you've met) and the in crowd. And the killer for hire. Okay, maybe not like all schools. HIPPOLYTA Hippolyta is a princess. An Amazon princess. She's a rich girl from a powerful (single parent, presumably) family who has been sent to Prometheus Academy to polish her rough edges. But school isn't wearing her down - maybe because she's cutting class to go slay a tyrant or sack a phalanx. She's the same age as Herc, and she also seeks a life of adventure. That's where the similarities end. Herc is motivated by his desire to help, to do the right thing. Hippolyta is programmed by a tough warrior tradition. Herc is a hero. Hippolyta is a "sword for hire." And because she is a Princess, she has diplomatic immunity. In our series, the Amazon women's warrior culture will be something like "Klingon" -- without the bad skin and goofy language. They are honor bound, violence prone and suspicious of everyone else. This makes Hippolyta a dedicated loner and therefore not likely to be normal presence in our Prometheus Academy daily events. Other than the occasional spot gag, when she appears Hippolyta will be a major story element. She and Herc will cross paths. He may be willing to help somebody for free... somebody who was going to be her paying customer. Or one of her missions could squarely pit her against Herc. Or she and Herc could be competing for some magical item. And, naturally, the real fun will come when they're stuck together, in close quarters and under attack. Even though there's virtually no chance of his feelings being reciprocated, Herc is totally smitten with her from the first time he lays eyes one her. No matter what she does (and she'll do some rough stuff), Herc believes there's some good hiding inside her - beneath all of that leather. HELEN OF TROY Everything about Helen is absolute perfection. She is flawless. Physically. Intellectually. Spiritually. But Helen of Troy proves that there is such a thing as too perfect. She's like every plucky Disney heroine rolled into one. Naturally, Cassandra gets physically ill in her presence. And like all perfect high school girls, her boyfriend is a complete jerk. He would be-- ADONIS He's our BMOC - "Big Mook On Campus." Leader of the upperclass, he's a prince by birth, not personality. With boundless vanity, ego and cowardice, Adonis is the pretty boy that we love to hate. From episode one, we have established a chip on Adonis's broad shoulder toward our hero that should only grow and get more ridiculous as we move on. He's probably insanely jealous whenever Helen speaks to another guy. AJAX A mountainous, coarse student who's probably about six years overdue for graduation. And he only speaks in animal noises. THE DISTINGUISHED FACULTY Herc's peers should be at the heart of any school based story. But that doesn't mean we won't have some fun with the adults. Most of the faculty are designed for quick hit jokes. For example-- Mr. Euclid, the obtuse geometry teacher. Phys Oedipus, the Richard Simmons-esque gym teacher. Parenthesis, Herc's well meaning, but fairly useless guidance counselor. As his name suggests, his gimmick is his parenthetical speech pattern (if you know what we mean.) Thesaurus, is the school janitor who uses five words when none would do. Old Man Draco, the school disciplinarian. His judgments tend to be harsh. Herodotus, the history teacher. Miss Thespis, the gushingly dramatic drama teacher. DÆDALUS, Icarus's dad and the shop teacher. Feel free to create more characters of this ilk as needed. We might even flesh out those listed. But don't hurt yourself. It's okay for some of our cast to one joke wonders. VILLAINS HADES He's our marquee villain. Brother of Zeus, uncle of Herc, lord of the dead. His personality is still the same unctuous William Morris agent so brilliantly voiced by James Woods in the feature. Hades is not your standard cartoon bad guy. He's the boss from Hell who hates the dead end (literally) job that his brother Zeus stuck him in. As in the movie, Hades' schemes tend to have a corporate analogy. He wraps all of his evil plans and fiendish plots in business jargon. He has concrete goals like the control of the Elysian fields or to boost business by eliminating the world's first doctor. Above all, he's burning to expand his power base. In the movie, Hades wanted the whole ball of wax, but in our series, we'll take things a domain at a time. He'll lie, cheat and steal from the other gods in vain attempts to get a piece of their action. His mercurial brother Poseidon and his sea will provide a likely recurring target for Hades' ambitions. But when fire meets water, you can guess the outcome. He never gets anywhere other than sinking Atlantis in the scuffle. Hades is a hot head whose blue flame hair ignites red during his frequent anger spasms. He can assume a smoky form to slip into a locked room or even flare up from a burning cauldron. Usually, his most fiery rage is leveled at those closest to him, which would be those faithful employees-- PAIN & PANIC Pain is always in pain. Panic is always freaking out. Simple, isn't it? Pain is Bobcat Goldthwait and Panic is Matt Frewer. Simpler still, no? And Panic's panic often exacerbates Pain's pain. And vice versa. As Hades' chief operatives they are charged with executing the detail work of his plans. Unfortunately, they stink at the details. The ability to morph into other creatures and people is the only skill that saves this duo from being complete losers. We can use this for a gag, like the feature's, "We are worms," moment. It is especially useful as a key to a scheme, like when they turn into the little innocent kids or combine into a seductress mare in the feature. We'll have a score of second string villains that we'll pull right out of mythology. And you can too, thanks to the attached "Welcome to our World" glossary. At this point we're looking to ECHIDNA, HECATE, NEMESIS, ARES and DISCORDIA as our strongest candidates to ruin Herc's day. But we're open one shots with the more gimmicky monsters and such. Much of the fun with these and Hippolyta, is the uneasy alliances they will form for their common destructive cause. Some Stories in the Works HERCULES AND THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL It's tough growing up. Just ask Hercules after his awkward first day of school at the Prometheus Academy. For a second opinion, ask Orthos, a two-headed cyclops who has been a disappointment to his mom, Echidna (the malevolent mother of all monsters). Echidna wants Orthos to lay off his junk food diet of commoners and livestock and start chomping on princes and heroes! Herc wants to escape the "loser" label at school, so he figures he has to make a name for himself. Two men. Two missions. Can you say "slugfest?" Punches are thrown, and lessons are learned. HERCULES AND THE DRIVING TEST It seems to Herc that everybody at school has their chariot driver's license, everybody except him. Simple driver's training turns into an Olympian task, because Herc has vowed to his school rival that he can get his license before sunset that very day. Phil wants no part of this "crash" course in driver's training. He doesn't understand this "fitting in" stuff -- "Why do you need to drive a chariot? You've gotta flying horse for Zeus's sake!" But when Herc starts practicing in the classic, candy apple red, cherried-out chariot from Phil's teen years, our hero suddenly finds himself with a backseat satyr. We've got Phil helping Herc with his skills behind the wheel, while Icarus and Cassandra grill him in preparation for the written exam. Unbeknownst to the lad, proud poppa Zeus, has made the same bold claim about Herc's success by sunset. It's a wager with Hades, and the Elysian Fields are at stake. So as if Herc's odds weren't bad enough already, he has the lord of the Underworld stacking the deck against him. HERCULES AND THE WORLD'S FIRST DOCTOR Hades is dismayed to see his business plummet when Hippocrates, the title doctor, starts curing all his prospects. As story contrivance would have it, Herc has fallen under Hippocrates charismatic spell and briefly considers medicine as a path to his hero-hood, annoying Phil to no end. But when Hades kills the doctor, Herc and Phil team up for some Hero action to free him from the Underworld. HERCULES AND THE ASSASSIN Herc's skill with a spear is lacking, as evidenced by one stray spear that rockets far over the horizon. When the spear finally strikes, it's many miles away, where it's misinterpreted as an assassination attempt on a King, who has received threats from a mysterious Assassin. A "property of Phil's gym" inscription puts the King's Secret Service on Phil's trail. Once they nab this "master assassin," they presume the danger has passed. It's up to Herc to clear Phil's name; save the King and expose the real Assassin -- HIPPOLYTA. HERCULES AND THE BIG NOTHING Good natured Hercules befriends an ancient and long-forgotten goddess named Nyx. She's so old that she even pre-dates Zeus. Herc decides to help her make a comeback. Nyx gradually regains her former power. Soon, she'll be able to return the Earth to the good old days. Herc is proud as punch and pleased with himself, until he discovers that her "good old days" consisted of an infinite void, which she likes to call "the big nothing." It's back to basics for the entire cosmos, unless Herc can undo his "good deed." HERCULES AND CIRCE'S SLUGFEST Circe, the beguiling witch-goddess with a voice like a songbird, runs a Vegas-style island resort, which is legend from sea to Aegean sea. She's promoting a boxing and wrestling tournament (to be read "full contact, steel cage, Mortal Kombat-style bloodsport") at her Palace to attract high rollers from as far away as Macedonia, including Pan, the King of the Satyrs (and his sycophantic Sat Pack). When Pan summons Phil to train his fighter, Phil's got a problem -- he can't refuse his King, but he doesn't want to go near Circe. Turns out they're old flames who parted on the worst of terms. Things get even stickier, when Herc accidentally demonstrates his super-strength, and his boxing career takes off. Herc is in the ring against a parade of mighty and monstrous opponents. Phil is in hot water with his ex. And it all comes to a head during the final bout. Herc finds out just how strongly the odds are fixed to favor the house, when Circe produces a fightin' Titan as her champion. It's clash of... well, Titans. HERCULES AND THE BIG GAME Hercules feels like he's made it in the High School pantheon when Gym teacher PhysOedipus drafts him and harnesses his power for the upcoming Panhellenic face off. But when a blood test reveals his demi-god status, he's disqualified and more of an outcast than ever. Meanwhile, Chimaera is busy looking for an appropriate venue for her mother Echidna's surprise 4,000th birthday bash and bloodfeast. A packed stadium is perfect. Herc gets a chance to show what a real hero does on the field. HERCULES AND THE PARENT'S WEEKEND Anticipating the arrival of Zeus for the Academy's parent's weekend, Herc has high hopes of besting Adonis at last. He's dismayed when his "earth parents" Alcmene and Amphitryon show up instead. And if he doesn't die of embarrassment, Echidna's hungry youngest Ladon might get him on his "baby's day out" rampage through Athens. Luckily, Alcmene's maternal tips to Echidna on teething save the day. In the end we discover that Zeus cannily passed the invitation on to Alcmene and Amphitryon to teach Herc a lesson in humility. HERCULES AND THE APOLLO MISSION When the Prometheus gang is assigned intern jobs at the Agora, Herc is horrified when he discovers his plum assignment at "Hero World," is actually a lowly one at "Gyro World." He begs off and begs his dad for a cool job. Zeus agrees and forces Apollo to take a day off and let Herc drive his sun-pulling chariot. When Herc drives to close to the earth to impress his friends at the Agora, Hades sends Pain and Panic to steal the sun tor brighten up the gloomy Underworld. While Hades finally gets some color, Herc has to admit his folly and steal back the sun. HERCULES AND THE RIVER STYX Herc can't tone down his strength enough to master Daedalus's simple metal shop assignment. He quits in frustration, claiming that skills would be of no use to him as a hero anyway. Meanwhile, Hades cons Poseidon into rerouting the river Styx around Athens, thus technically making it part of his domain and turning the high school into a real Hell. For Herc, this means a shop class with out end. Of course, when plots converge, Heroes triumph as Herc does when he masters his metal shop assignment on a scale commensurate with his Herculean abilities. HERCULES AND THE KING OF THESSALY Salmoneus, the tyrant king of Thessaly tries to boost his poll score by impersonating Zeus ordering his people to worship their ruler. Things go awry when Herc shows up and is disappointed to see it's not his dad. Then the real Zeus shows up and unmasks the impostor and says hello to his boy. The kingdom boots out Sal and crowns the Hercules their king by rights of divine intervention. Salmoneus hooks up with Pain and Panic in a vain attempt to toss out Herc, but everything backfires and Hercules' power only grows. Finally, Hercules "invents" democracy as a way to get out of his stifling duties and get back to school. WELCOME TO OUR WORLD W riters on our series have the richest resource for which any storyteller could wish -- the entire canon of Greek myth. Of course the down side to this is that these stories have been told about a million times, so we have to dig a little deeper to make them fresh and fun. What follows is a selected glossary of mythological and historical ancient Greece, both famous and obscure. It is meant as a starting point that can help us all build a consistent world for our show. In many cases, we've suggested a possible attitude to make a stock figure fit the offbeat slant of our Hercules. We'd like to see even minor characters be thought out enough that they could return in a larger future role. As if this isn't a long enough list, we will update it as stories develop to reflect the growing population of our world as it is established in actual stories. In the meantime, we urge all writers to pick up Robert Graves or some other overview of mythology and surprise us with a gem that we overlooked. Those in bold are regulars or "sure things" for the series. All others are up for grabs if you have a compelling story. . ACADEMIES - Grove outside Athens where Plato taught. ACHELOUS - (uhk uh LOH uhs): A river god. He competes with Hercules for the favor of a beautiful woman. (Deianira, Hercules second wife. We'd obviously substitute someone else.) Tried to beat Herc by transforming into a raging river to drown him, then a serpent and finally, a bull. Herc won, sending Achelous underground to bubble as a spring. Good fodder for a competition story. Might reverse order of events to get to a big flood climax. ACHILLES - (uh KILL eez): Skin stronger than armor except for, well , you know about his podiatric problems. In our world, he's a former student of Phil's, now middle aged. We play him like a shell-shocked vet, over cautious and skittish. He wears heavy iron shoes... just in case. His horse, BALIUS not only talks, but can unyoke itself and stand on two legs. ADONIS - (uh DAHN uhs): School contemporary of Herc's. We'll play him as the "big mook on campus." In contrast to Herc's position on the learning curve, Adonis is full of self-confidence and bravado. He's a prince and proud of it. He's usually surrounded by a phalanx of brawny bodyguards, a la the secret service. Voiced by Dietrich Bader. AEGIS - (EE jihs): Magical goat skin that Zeus used on his shield. We'll play it as a sought after McGuffin that gives those who don it incomparable protection. AEOLUS - (EE oh luhs): Reclusive, temperamental god of the winds. Lived on the island of Aeolia where he kept the winds in a cave and dispatched them at will. Depending on his mood, Aeolus might release a gentle breeze or a catastrophic typhoon. If ever so delicately sweet talked, he has been known to sew a wind in a leather bag so that a sailor might use it to speed his journey. AGAMEMNON - (ag uh MEM nuhn): King of Mycenae and leader of the Greeks against Troy. Traditionally described as lecherous and swinish, but a formidable general. We'll play him as a gruff drill sergeant. AGONIPPE - Fountain on Mount Helicon, sacred to the Muses. AJAX - (AY jax): Traditionally a huge, beefy warrior. In our mythology, another schoolmate of Herc's. We'll play him as the "Bluto Blutarski" of our group. Mountainous, coarse, crass, and about six years overdue for graduation. He only speaks in animal sounds. ALECTRYON - (uh LEK trih uhn): The unlucky sentinel. Turned into a rooster as punishment for falling asleep on his watch. AMAZONS - (AM uh zuhnz): Warrior women that used men only for breeding. What more can we say? AMBROSIA - Food of the goods that conferred everlasting youth and beauty. AMPHITRITE - (am fih TRY tee): Queen of the sea who cruises the waves on a crystal chariot pulled by dolphins. Free spirited and joyous, if a bit flighty. ANDROMEDA - (an DRAHM ee duh): Saved from being eaten by a sea monster by Theseus. Became his wife. ANTAEUS - (an TEE uhs): Giant son of mother earth. Fearsome wrestler. In his big match with Herc he could not be pinned because each time he falls to earth, he renews his strength from mother earth. Hercules figured this out and held him over his head until his strength drained. APHRODITE - (af ruh DY tee): Goddess of love. Her only duty was to incite desire. Nice work if you can get it. Wherever she walks flowers bloom, skies clear and birds sing. We'll play this up for comic effect. Even Hades melts in her presence. APOLLO - (uh PAHL oh): The sun-god, who rides his golden chariot across the sky each day. He's also connected with medicine, music, poetry and mathematics. One of the more moderate and even tempered of gods, we'll play Apollo fairly straight. With his golden bow and arrow and his keen wit, he's a fine balance of physical and mental ideal -- sort of Captains Kirk and Picard combined. ARCADIA - Paradise. A place of great beauty and pastoral simplicity. ARES - (AIR eez): God of war. An ally of Hades thanks to the business he creates with his war mongering and potentially our key second string villain. We play him like "Buck Turgidson" in Dr. Strangelove. Patron god of war loving Sparta, his archrival is Athena, the patroness His entourage includes his two hench-sons -- FEAR and TERROR (translation of Deimos and Phobos). What these two thugs lack in competence they make up for with casual dumb brutality. Ares and his boys ride in a dark, spear-proof , luxury stretch chariot pulled by fierce horses named FIRE, FLAME and FLICKA. Okay, two fierce chariot horses; Flicka's not quite with the program. ARGONAUTS - (AHR guh nawts): Crew of heroes recruited by Jason in his quest for the golden fleece. ARGUS - (AHR guhs): A spy who just happens to be a hundred eye giant. Killed by Hermes, which we might craft a story around. In execution, we might consider that only one or two of his eyes are open at a given time, but his body is covered with ocular options. Thus, just when you least expect it a kneecap will blink open and stare at you. Personality might be an annoying busy body -- "I spy, with number sixty five eye..." ARTEMIS - (AHR tuh mihs): Chiefly the moon goddess, but we'll fold control of night into Morpheus's sleep powers. We'll use her as the wilderness/survivalist "Lady of the Wild Things." Phil might have had some ugly run ins with her in the past. She's cold and aloof and loathes crowds and cities. Wild animals were sacred to her, especially lion, bear, wolf and all birds and they silently do her bidding. Potentially a foe to both Hades and Herc. ASCLEPIUS - (ass KLEE pee uhs): Father of medicine. Enemy of Hades due to his miraculous healing powers. We use "Hippocrates" for name recognition, but his personality is that of the over the top TV doctor, played with manic gusto by Mandy Patinkin. ATHENA - (uh THEE nuh): Goddess of wisdom and protector of Athens. An impractical intellectual in our world. Her wisdom is at such a high level , that it frequently takes a whole episode before anyone can interpret her advice. Her audiences frequently get that glazed look of people who watch too many Sunday morning public affairs shows. Sister and foe of Ares. ATLAS - (AT luhs): Titan whose punishment for fighting against Zeus was to station himself on the far western margin of the world and bear the rim of the sky on his shoulders. We'll probably go with the traditional image of the guy with the globe on his back. His personality could be as pessimistic as his situation. And he's always trying to trick somebody into taking over - "Could you hold this for just a sec?" ATROPOS - Eldest of the three fates. She's the one with the scissors, ready to cut the thread of life. AURORA - Goddess of the dawn. Each morning she would spread her white wings on the horizon and toss her flame covered hair. Technically named "Eos," we'll stick with the more recognizable name. Cursed with a lust for young mortal boys. A gold star for anyone who can figure out something to do with that tid bit. AYTREUS - (AY tree us): As twisted a tragic tale as any in mythology, we can reduce him to cameo status as the ancient world's most unlucky man. BACCHUS - (BAHK uhs): Roman name (and the one used in the feature) for Dionysus, god of the vine, master of revels, bestower of ecstasy. Obviously we'll have to play down the drunken orgy aspect of his personality, but even within our sanitized limits, juicy Dionysus stories abound in mythology. For example, once he was captured by pirates who captured him on board thinking he was a prince they could ransom. The ship stopped, even though it was in deep water with a brisk wind. Vines sprouted out of the ocean, around the hull and twined around the mast. The galley slaves oars turned into serpents that slithered out of their hands and onto the decks. The wind in the rigging became the sound of flutes and where the wine god was sitting there was suddenly a golden lion in his place. BOREAS - (BOH reh uhs): The north and most feared wind. BRIAREUS - (bry AHR ee uhs): A hundred handed giant. We'll play him a relatively "normal" two handed giant who has the power to manifest hands in his surroundings. Trees, rocks, water, even fire can sprout fantastic hands when he is near. BUTES - (BU teez): The argonauts' expert bee keeper. Imagine the story possibilities! CACUS - (KAY kuhs): Three headed, flame breathing shepherd who lives in a grisly cave decorated with his victims skulls and bones. We might play this unpleasant adversary as one who confuses with contradictory information spewing from each of his three heads, representing conservative, liberal and centrist opinions. CADMUS - (KAD muhs): Founder of Thebes. In his most famous episode, he killed a dragon and sowed his teeth. From the teeth mighty warriors rose, who immediately began to fight each other, while Cadmus watched and waited until only five were left. With those men, he founded Thebes. CALYDONIAN BOAR - It's a giant, mean pig which proves exceedingly difficult to hunt. CALYPSO - (kuh LIHP soh): Beautiful Titaness who lives alone on the isle of Ogygia. We can substitute Herc for Odysseus in her story. When Herc is shipwrecked on her shores, she promises him eternal youth with a catch -- He may never leave. Complications when Phil tries to drag him away, and becomes smitten by Calypso's considerable charms himself. CANATHUS - A spring whose crystal waters were said to wash away age and fretfulness. In mythology, key to Hera's beauty regimen. For our purposes, a fountain of youth. CASSANDRA - (kuh SAN druh): In our show she's the school pal of Herc who sees the dark side of everything. Like the Cassandra of legend, her gloom and doom prophesies are accurate, but so unrelenting that they're usually ignored. She's so opposite Herc that the two form a close, charming bond. Played by Sandra Bernhard. CASTOR and POLYDEUCES - (KASS ter) (pawl ih DEW seez): The jock Spartan twins. Castor is the best wrestler in the world (until Herc beats him.) Polydeuces is a boxer with iron hands. Herc beats him in a match that parodies the big Vegas hype-fests. Eventually, they become allies when they reappear as Argonauts. CECROPS - (SEE krahps): Half dragon, half human, Cecrops was actually a very progressive (i.e., maybe human sacrifice isn't such a swell idea) ruler of Attica. Herc could aid him in his progressive agenda against a loutish, backward constituency. CENTAURS - (SEHN torz): Rowdy creatures with the bodies of horses and the torso's of men. For our purposes a marauding biker gang. CERBERUS - (SIR bur us): Hades' fierce three-headed guard dog. Music soothes him. Grabbing him by the throats will work in a pinch. CERCOPES - (sir KOH peez): Dwarfish, larcenous, laugh-happy, prankster twins. Good for a lighthearted episode in that they are not real villains, but they are pretty annoying to Herc and can ultimately lead him into bigger dangers. CERYNEIAN HIND - (sur ih NEE uhn HY'nd): Magnificent stag that proves an elusive target for Hercules. When he finally captures it, Artemis intercedes to save he beast. CHARON - (KAHR uhn): The surly boatman who ferried the dead into the Hades' underworld. Kind of the Taxi driver from Hell. Maybe we'll even play him with a touch of De Niro's Travis Bickel. CHARYBDIS - (kuh RIB dihss): An underwater monster in the form of a whirlpool that sucks ships under. CHIMAERA - (ki MARE uh): A fire breathing she-goat with a lion's head, a goat's body, and a serpent's tail. Killed in mythology by putting lead in her mouth that her fire then melted. Because of her memorable appearance, we might consider her as a stock monster that shows up as a brief obstacle when Herc least expects it. Our Chimaera is a prissy and proper sort of gal who is undercut by a sassy sentient snake head on her tail -- literally a smart ass. CIRCE - (SUR see): Demigoddess skilled in spells and sorcery. Said to have a magical singing voice. Falls fast and hard for any man that comes to her island home, but quickly tires of them and turns them into animals that befit their personality. CLIO - (KLY oh): The muse of history. CLOTHO - (KLOH thoh): Youngest of the fates. The one that spins the thread of life. CORNUCOPIA - (kor noo KOH pih uh): The "horn of plenty." A goat horn, which thanks to Zeus, replenishes itself with fruit and never empties. CRETAN BULL - (KRET uhn BULL): Fire breathing (again) white bull that was the subject of Hercules' seventh labor. CRONUS - (KROH nuhs): Father of Zeus. Youngest of the titans. Swallowed all of his children until Zeus was born in secret and grew to liberate them. His role in our series will probably be limited to Zeus making cryptic references to "my old man." CUPID - Properly, Eros, but we'll go with pop culture and the Romans here. The archer of love. Those pierced by his golden arrows fall passionately in love with whomever Cupid wished. A leaden arrow violently elicited the opposite effect. Usually depicted as a cherub with golden wings, we want to invest his personality with that of a more modern "god of love." CYCLOPES - (SY klahps): Herc fights one of these one-eyed giants in the climax of the feature, so we'll probably have to dream up some variation for our series. In mythology, they are variously numbered from three (forging Zeus's thunderbolts) to a whole island of their descendants that Odysseus meets. CYCNUS - (SIHK nuhs): A name given to a lot of mythological characters. One that might be useful to us is the tale of a man who delighted in challenging passerby to chariot duels. When he challenged Hercules, the two met in a great crash and continued hand to hand until Zeus hurled a thunder bolt between them to put a stop to it. DACTYLS - (DAK tihlz): Ten demigods (five men, five women) that dwelt on Mt. Ida in Phrygia. Symbolic of primitive man's wonder at the use of his fingers. We might play them as the Greek equivalent of primitive backwoods types. Maybe even a feuding clan story. DÆDALUS - (DEHD uh luhs): The greatest inventor in the Greek world. His creations range from the charming little toys for the daughters of king Minos to charming big toys for his wife - notably a certain fetching hollow wooden cow. He was punished by being forced to build and sentenced to live in the labyrinth. To escape, he crafted his wax wings for he and his son, Icarus. In our world, he's still Icarus' eccentric father (Icarus calls him "Dadalus"), but we'll shy away from the standard cartoon "wacky inventor" and shade him a bit stranger. He calls himself an "inventist" and he's driven to the brink of madness (if not beyond) by his odd quests. Oh, and he's the school's shop teacher. DEIANEIRA - (dee yuh NY ruh): Hercules' second and final wife, therefore not of particular use to us. But, for the obsessive, we might use her name for a girl that Herc that Herc could be mildly smitten with. In one tale, Deianeira is turned into a guinea fowl and back to human again. DELPHI - (DEHL fi): Home of the most famous oracle in the ancient world. Priestesses of Apollo sat on three legged stools straddling fissures in the cave floor which emitted gusts of steam. After chewing some laurel and entering a steamy trance, they would utter riddles. When solved, these riddles were purported to give a glimpse into the future. In our mythology, we lessen the mystical side and heighten the commercial aspect to get "the Oracle friends network." The centerpiece of the Oracle is the sacred stone that Cronus was tricked into swallowing instead of Zeus. It would be a shame (and a story) if something were to happen to it... DEMETER - (duh MEE tuhr): Goddess of the harvest. Famous for her mood swings. Happiness meant abundant crops, anger brought famine. She never forgave Hades for taking her daughter, the flower princess Persephone. Persephone must spend every winter with Hades, so her mother will not allow the earth to bear fruit during that time. We'll give her a big voice and a big personality to match; think Peg Bundy on "Married With Children." DEUCALION - (duh KAY lih uhn): The Greek Noah. He and his wife Pyrra built an ark to outlast floods sent by Zeus. When the waters subsided, mankind was wiped out. They consulted the Delphic Oracle, who's riddle answer was: "Go with head averted, and throw behind you the bones of your mother." The "mother" was mother earth, and her "bones" were stones. When the couple did as directed, the stones turned into humans (his male, hers female) and the world was repopulated. DIOMEDES - (dy oh MEE deez): Brutal fellow who kept a stable of man eating mares. Hercules was to yoke these mares to his chariot for his eighth labor. When Diomedes objected, Herc fed him to his horses. While we'd have to tone down that aspect, we might do a variation on the episode. Perhaps we could play the horses as docile and sweet around one character, vicious and monstrous around another. DISCORDIA - Roman name for Ate, a banished, earthbound goddess who is known for her unparalleled mischief making powers. Unlike Herc's quest to return to Mount Olympus, Dis is having too good a time on earth to care about her former home. Sometime ally with Ares, but she prefers to work alone. We might play her like a female "Beetlejuice" with all the grossness and magical invention that implies. Her introductory episode could detail her being kicked off Mount Olympus. DRACO - Athenian lawgiver who demanded the death penalty for almost every infringement of his code. Source of "Draconian." DRYADS - (DRY uhdz): Wood-nymphs. In the feature, when Phil tries to flirt with them they revert to their oak form. No woody jokes, please. DRYOPE - (DRY oh pee): Nymph from the Jason and the Argonauts story. She fell in love with Hylas, a friend of Hercules, and pulled him into a spring. Hercules ripped apart the island looking for him but he was never seen again. We might play a nymph falling for Herc himself and pulling him into her water netherworld. Phil could be too busy flirting with the other nymphs to notice at first. ECHIDNA - (ee KID nuh): A monster and the mother of monsters. Half woman and half serpent, she bore Cerberus, the Chimera, Scylla, Orthos and more. We might play against her visual as a kvetching mom -- "Hydra has a hundred heads but does one ever ask how I'm doing?" Voiced by Kathy Lee Gifford. Really. ECHO - (EHK oh): Nymph who was punished by the gods to only repeat what is spoken to her. This causes a problem when she falls for Narcissus, as he finds her boring. Eventually she fades away and only her voice remains. ELECTRA - (ee LEHK truh): Scheming daughter of Clytaemnestra and Agamemnon in the oft told tragic tale. We'll pick her up at Herc's school and treat her like another great complex character in literature, Archie's Veronica. ELEUSINIAN MYSTERIES - (ehl yu SINH ee uhn): Annual rites performed by worshipers of Demeter, the goddess of the harvest. A key ritual of these mysteries was a dance-mime of Demeter's search and eventual discovery of Persephone, as her daughter returns form the Underworld to bring flowers back to the earth. ELYSIAN FIELDS - (ee LIHZ uhn): The Underworld's good neighborhood, where heroes and the blessed go. In our mythology, Hades and his minions are forbidden from entering there, which frustrates the hell out of him. Co-opting the fields could be a secondary Hades motive in a few stories. EMPUSAE - (ehm PU see): Small demons who attended Hacate, queen of the hags. Filthy and disgusting, they had one donkey's hoof and one brass foot. Their hands were claws and they had leathery wings. They were probably part of the thinking that went into Pain and Panic. But we'll play up their fondness for haunting roads and scaring travelers. They could even become fair maidens o seduce unwitting men -- or Phil. But, in a twist that would seem at home in a Monty Python sketch, they are emotionally sensitive and can be driven away with a string of well placed insults. ENDYMION - (en DEE my on) : When Selene fell in love with him, she asked the gods to grant him eternal youth. They responded by causing him to fall into a dreamless, eternal sleep. Could be a "Rip Van Winkle" story area. ERATO - Muse of love poetry. Not one of the "big five" from the feature, but might be a nice guest in a cupid story. ERYMANTHIAN BOAR - (air ih MAN thih uhn): To capture this huge, savage beast alive was Hercules' fourth labor. The boar roamed the slopes if Mt. Erymanthus in Arcadia, terrorizing the citizens. To capture it, Herc ran it into a deep snow drift, where he was able to leap upon its back and truss him up. ERYSICTHON - (air ih SIHK thuhn): A king with a king-sized appetite and then some. He ate all the food in his castle. Then all the food in his land until it was but a barren waste. Then he went to another land and ate until his gold ran out, which prompted him to sell his only daughter to wealthy merchant. The daughter prayed for and got the power to transform herself so she could turn into a gull and fly away-- back to her gluttonous dad, who sold her again and again. Finally, she met a man who also had the power to transform himself and she forgot about Erysicthon. As the famished old man cursed an indifferent sky, he noticed that his knuckle looked rather tasty. He took a bite. Then another and another, until there was nothing left except lips. Then he swallowed them and vanished altogether. EUPHEMUS - (yoo FEE muhs): One of Jason's Argonauts, he was such a good swimmer it was said he could walk on water. A key member of the crew, we'll highlight his seafaring skills as well as his genteel personality. So courtly is he that he always couches the most dire of circumstances in then gentlest of terms. Thus euphemisms were born. EURUS - (YOO rus): The East Wind. Violent and capricious, the bane of every sailor. Prone to sudden, treacherous strikes. EURYSTHEUS - (yoo RIHS thee uhs): In myth, the King of Mycenae who assigned Hercules to his twelve labors. The aspect that we could have fun with is that he was known as the most cowardly king in all of mythology. Ignoring his real role, we could use him as a comic character to challenge Hercules heroism. EUTERPE - (yoo TUR pee): Muse of lyric poetry. FATES - (FAYT'S): The three dread sisters: Clotho, Lachesis and Atropos. The film's gimmick of them having one eye between them actually came from another trio know as the "Graeae." Story alert: In their legend, their shared eye was kidnapped and held until they would reveal a certain secret. FURIES - (FU rihz): Hades' hell-hags with brass wings and brass claws. They pounced on mortals who offended the gods and harried them from place to place, never letting them rest. They were never referred to by name, but were euphemistically called the "kindly ones." GALATEA - (gal uh TEE uh): Object of Pygmalion's affection. Began as an ivory statue that the sculptor fell in love with. When he prayed to Aphrodite to give it life, the goddess took pity on him (and thought the statue was a good likeness of herself) and answered his prayers. Galatea walked off the pedestal into her creator's arms. GANYMEDE - (GAN ih meed): This prince of Troy was said to be the most beautiful youth alive. Became Zeus's cup bearer (and more in some accounts.) We might use the name for a ringer in a Narcissus story, perhaps playing him like a "Fabio" male model. GERYON - (G'AIR ih uhn): The antagonist in Hercules' tenth labor to capture this monster's beautiful red cattle. Known as one of the strongest men alive, he was also in the running for strangest -- with three heads, six hands and three bodies joined at the waist. GLAUCUS - (GLAH kuhs): A fisherman who discovered an herb that could keep fish alive after he caught them. He was drafted by Poseidon to heal wounded fish at the bottom of the sea. The good news was he was granted immortality, the bad news is he will spend it doctoring carp. GOLDEN FLEECE: The magical pelt that was the object of Jason's quest. In one myth, the wearer of it could summon rain at will, but we'll upgrade its powers to a much more animation friendly level. Left to decide is whether its granting of wishes has a "Monkey's Paw" ironic punishment angle, or if it just a temperamental wish giver. Whatever it does, it should be strong enough that it after it is established in the multi-part Jason story it can be revisited to mine further stories. GORDIUS - (GOR dih uhs): In one account, he loved to create puzzles and solve them, but was stumped by his "Gordian Knot." The legend was that the person who united it would rule, but Alexander merely severed it with his sword. Thus the popular meaning of the term is to sidestep complexities with more forthright action. GORGONS - (GOR guhnz): Medusa and her equally hideous sisters Stheino and Euryale. GRACES - Gentle, radiant half-sisters of the muses went about mankind spreading joy and peace. Their names were Aglaia (Splendor), Euphrosyne (Festivity) and Thalia (Rejoicing). We'll play them as relentlessly, nauseatingly, cheerful. Imagine if Katie Couric, Joan Lunden and Martha Stewart went on a crusade to spread perky chit chat and dinner party dos and don'ts throughout the land. Okay, maybe not as extreme as that dark scenario, but close. Even the ever horny Phil, gallops the other way when he sees them coming. Of course Herc politely feigns interest in their recipe for ambrosia (mandarin oranges, coconut, cool whip). At least, we think he's feigning. GRIFFINS - (GRIHF ihnz): Winged lion with the head of an eagle. In myth, guarded a legendary trove of gold hidden under the snow in the north country. Necessary because their neighbors were the one-eyed ARISMAPSI, the most thievish folk in the entire world. We play them like adrenaline junkie "top gun" fighter pilots. HADES - (HAY deez): Lord of the dead. Star. Pinnacle of our antagonist hierarchy. HALITHERSES - (hal uh THIAR seez): The birdman of Ithaca. He could speak to and understand all avian creatures, and thanks to the birds' great travels he was extremely well informed, though no one would heed him because, c'mon, the guy was talking to the pigeons! Most famously he knew of Odysseus' return before anyone else. If he shows up in our series it might be a kook that Herc dismisses, then later comes to rely on for his skill. HARMONIA - (hahr MOH nih uh): Goddess who wore a magical golden necklace that was said to grace its wearer with unimaginable beauty. She could appear as a character who's beauty is literally skin deep or the fabled "Necklace of Harmonia" could be the McGuffin in a story. Imagine the complications of Medusa got her hands on it... or even worse, Phil. HARPIES - (HAHR pihz): Monstrous, vulturelike female creatures who were said to fetch those unwilling to die to bring to Hades. Other legends put them as responsible for all of earth's lost items. We might consider playing them relatively straight as monsters, since the comic approach would lead us down a sexist, and more importantly, too familiar path. HECATE - (HECK uh tee): Usually depicted at Hades' side, we'll take this nasty goddess out of the underworld and onto earth, where her sorcery and magic can do some real damage. She should be a genuinely frightening and dark villainess, with the smoky voiced sense of mystery that is usually attached to a B-movie voodoo priestess. In subsequent episodes she might be covetous of Hades' job, using Herc as bait or leverage to get at him. HECUBA - (HEHK yoo buh): Mother of Paris. We might use her for dark comic relief for she was known to be the queen of the haranguing, nagging, raging -- well, put it this way, her ultimate fate was to be turned into a brindle bitch. HELEN: As a classmate of Herc's we'll exaggerate her stunning beauty and haughty homecoming queen personality. We might foreshadow her role in the upcoming Trojan war by having testosterone drenched arguments seem to spontaneously erupt around her whenever she enters a room. With a face "voted most likely to start an international conflict." HELICON - (HEHL uh kuhn): Enchanted mountain that is home to the fabled Hippocrene spring -- said to have variously medicinal or narcotic properties. HELIOS - (HEE lih ohs): The sun charioteer. We might fold his stories into Apollo's or develop him as an employee. HEPHAESTUS - (hee FEHS tus): The lame smith-god. Lord of artificers, patron of crafts. We'll highlight his practical side, forever building magical furniture and munitions and tackling the jobs with the plain spoken modesty of a Yankee carpenter. "Yaah, I 'spose she's a pretty god spear." He was married to Aphrodite in an odd couple pairing, but we'll probably ignore that. Most famous for forging Zeus's lightning bolts, there are also accounts of enchanted toys, a table that walks and serves and a chair who's arms come to life to hold a person captive. HERA - (HUR uh): Herc's mom in the movie mythology. In probably the most radical departure from tradition, she's played as a stereotypical mom. In all mythology non-Disney mythologies, Hera's jealousy and temper are at the center of many of the most famous tales. HERACLES: Never heard of him. HERMAPHRODITUS: Next on Oprah. HERMES - (HUR meez): Played with unctuous enthusiasm by Paul Schaeffer in the movie. We'll expand his role in the series and give him interests beyond Zeus's messenger, though the he'll be the most common means by which the big guy communicates with his son. In mythology he's the god of trade, travelers and commerce as well as the patron of liars, gamblers and thieves. All of this seems to mesh nicely with the Vegas hustler attitude of our Hermes. He'd probably get the gang in trouble as much as he bails them out. His naughty side would mesh well with some of Phil's extracurricular interests. Also, if he were ever to lose those winged sandals we might have us a story. HESIONE - (hee SY oh nee): Daughter of an early king of Troy who was tied to a rock as a sacrifice to appease Poseidon. Hercules rescued her from a sea monster. HESPERIDES - (hehs PAIR uh deez): Hespere, Aegle and Erytheis are three apple nymphs who guard the golden apples of Hera's tree. In one myth they were replaced by the dragon Ladon as punishment for stealing some of the divine fruit. We might have Herc help them get their old job back. HESTIA - (HEHS tih uh): Goddess of the hearth. Queen of the homestead, patroness of marriage and instigator of domestic joys. But she never married. If Martha Stewart is itchin' to do cartoons, we have a part for her. HIPPE - (HIHP pee): Lovely coltish daughter of the Centaur Cheiron. She could be a target of Phil's passion. We could play her personality just like her name sounds. HIPPODAMEIA - (hihp oh duh MY uh): A princess who's father (Oenomaus) was reluctant to marry her off so he challenged all potential suitors to a chariot race. Winner takes all, loser gets a set of steak knives. Well, actually, the loser got his head on a pike. There were many losers. We might do a story where the princess gets a crush on Herc and before he can get to first base he finds himself in race for his life. HIPPOLYTA - (hih PAWL uh tuh): Queen of the Amazons, notable for her golden girdle that was the object of Hercules' ninth labor. HOPE - What was left inside Pandora's jar after all of the evils were released. More of a concept then a character, Hope has been personified in some stories and is certainly a possibility for us. HOURS - (OW urz): Trio charged with regulating the seasons: Eunomia (Harmony), Dyke (Justice) and Eirene (Peace). Half-sisters to the fates, but much more pleasant to be around. HYACHINTHUS - (hy uh SIHN thuhs): Notable in how he died: Boreus, the north wind blew a discus off course so that it might kill him. Also, Spartans have a spring festival called the Hyacinthia in his honor where they suspend all the hostilities. HYDRA - Much as we'd love to see this monster, it is such a pivotal event in the movie, we should shy away. HYLAS - (HY luhs): Either a friend of Hercules or his "minion and darling" depending on what you read. Kidnapped by Nymphs and never seen again. HYPERBOREANS - (hy pur BOH ree uhnz): Those who dwelt in a place beyond the north wind. HYPNOS - (HIP nuhs): God of sleep. Father of dreams. We might have him show up in a dream sequence as a tour guide/host type. In our series he is known as Morpheus. ICARUS - (IHK uh ruhs): Relatively minor character in mythology, but major character in our show. One of Herc's best pals at school, our Icarus is a total oddball whose imagination always outleaps his capacities. Take that incident with the wax wings; enthusiasm wins out over logic and sensible advice every time. But in spite of the trouble he causes, he's a loyal and fun friend for Herc to have. The fact that his father Daedalus has a workshop full of cool experimental technologies doesn't hurt his utility to our show either. ICELOS - (YS uh luhs): A son of Hypnos and part of his "dream-brood," prowling the "margins of night." His strangest attribute is that he changed himself into a different animal every night. We'll cast him as a werewolf with a twist. More like a "were-what?" IO - (EYE ih): Quite a sordid tale. Loved by Zeus, he turned her into a cow to hide her from his jealous wife. Hera in turn sent her hundred eye spy, Argus to keep a few dozen eyes on her. Zeus sent Hermes to lull the beast to sleep with his flute, then kill him. Hera responded by sending her gadfly with a "stinger as long as a dagger" to torment the bovine beauty. Finally Zeus his her in Egypt. Though we bite off this story, individual details might be co-opted for other stories. IOLE - (EYE oh lee): She figures in two phases of Hercules' life, one of which might be useful to us. He father threw an archery contest to determine her future husband. Hercules won but the father claimed he had not won fairly and refused to turn him over to Iole. IPHIS - (EYE fuss): Stung with unrequited love, he hung himself in the doorway of the object of his affection. Even with the corpse in the door, Anaxerete, the girl, continued to show no emotion for him. Aphrodite turned her to stone as punishment. We might take aspects and the spirit of this to intensify the story of Herc's first crush on a girl who doesn't know he's alive. IRIS - (EYE rus): The rainbow goddess and Hera's messenger. Famously good willed, not even the most dastardly gods could stay mad at her when she flashed her sweet smile. JASON: We'll reduce the huge tale of Jason and the Argonauts (look it up) into a neat three parter. In our series continuity, Jason will be an ex-student of Phil's who failed in his first attempt at the Golden Fleece. We'll play the reunion of Phil and Jason as rocky as the coast of the Sirens' island with Herc trying to be a peacemaker between them. Perhaps a dose of hero worship toward Jason, too. LACHESIS - (LAK ee sihs): The Fate who measures the thread of life. LADON - (LAY duhn): A particularly grotesque serpent monster that is described as a half mile of living gullet, with teeth the size of elephant tusks and jaws hinged at his tail. Charged to guard the golden apple tree, Hercules killed it by hurling first honey combs in its mouth, then the hives themselves. Interestingly, this hideous creature was said to be fluid in countless languages. We play him (initially, at least) as a rambunctious teething baby. LAELAPS - (LEE laps): The best hunting hound the world has ever seen. Could track any scent and hold any quarry, no matter how large, until his master arrives. We might play his unlimited devotion for laughs, in what seems good at first quickly becomes annoying. LAESTRYGONES - (less TRIG oh neez): Man eating giants who lived on an island where day and night follow each other in minute long intervals. Odysseus made the mistake of visiting this island. LAOCOON - (lay AHK oh uhn): He's the guy (priest actually) who said "Beware of Greeks bearing gifts" in suspicion of the Trojan Horse. LEMNIAN WOMEN: The women of the island of Lemnos. They welcomed Jason and his crew as only ladies who had some time ago murdered all of their men could. Nine months later the result was something akin to the aftermath of the '65 New York blackout. LETHE - (LEE thee): The river of oblivion. Traditionally, the first stop on the path to the underworld, this beautiful sparkling stream lured the afterlife travelers to take a sip, which then caused them to lose all memories of their mortal life. Also known as the "spring of forgetfulness" or "the can't fail plot device." LEUCIPPOS - (loo SIPH us): The original cross dresser (actually Achilles hid from the draft this way, but that's another story.). Leucippos dressed like a woman to bathe with a Nymph he has a crush on. Apollo shot him full of arrows for his efforts. LINUS - (LY nuhs): Brother of Orpheus known for his mournful dirges that were known as "Linus Songs." In one legend he remanded Hercules for his heavy handed lyre technique, so Herc pummeled him to death with it. While we won't be doing THAT story, we might use the name and the down beat personality for a music teacher who turns every song into a blues song. LOTUS-EATERS: Here's the drill: 1. Eat lotus. 2. Zone out. 3. Repeat. We could go for the obvious and portray this blissed out island as Los Angeles. Whatever we do, the tricky part is to mine this rich area while avoiding anything that smacks of a drug story. LYCAON - (ly KAY uhn): More raw material for a werewolf story. His actual tale is as sordid as they come, but the useable nugget is that this Arcadian king was turned into a wolf. As the rest involves child sacrifice and the like, we're on our own from there. LYMNADES - (lihm NAY deez): Water demons who lived in lakes, streams and marshes. They were accomplished mimics and they would use that skill to kill. When a traveler approached they would cry for help in the voice of a loved one. When the victim investigated, he or she would be pulled in and drowned. MAENADS - (MEE nahdz): Female disciples of Bacchus. MARON - (MAHR uhn): Yet another one eyed giant. Probably gets testy when people mispronounce his name. MEDEA - (mee DEE uh): She loved and hated with equal passion. Not the most likely character to show up in "Disney's Hercules," but anything's possible. If nothing else, her creative use of trickery and sorcery and her famed jealousy might be useful. MEDUSA - (muh DOO suh): Youngest of the Gorgons. It'll be tough to come up with a twist on this oft-told tale of the woman with the stony gaze, but we'll try. One approach might be to tell her origin tale. Less well known than her snaky hair is the fact that she was once very beautiful and she was transformed as a punishment. Or maybe we'll just play her as a sentient head in a box. MELAMPUS - (mee LAM puhs): The salient skill of this wise man was his ability to talk to animals. The critters supposedly shared secret knowledge with him, giving him powers of prophesy and healing beyond that of other mortals. All that aside, we could play him like a raving loon from the perspective of most characters. MELISSA: A mountain nymph connected with the honey she fed infant Zeus. If nothing else, she sounds like someone for Phil to lust after. MELPOMENE - (mehl PAHM ee nee): The muse of tragedy. MENTOR: Trusted counselor of Odysseus. We could counter the obvious and give this name to a character who gives lousy advice. Maybe a story where Herc seeks him out after a spat with Phil and Thalia. METRA - (MEE truh): Daughter of Erysicthon who was able to transform herself into an animal to escape from her purchaser. MIDAS - (MY duhs): The king with the golden touch has been well covered in pop culture, so we'll have to dig deep if we want to use this tale. We might tell the lesser known story of his donkey ears and the barber who couldn't keep it secret. Perhaps we could tell a story that winds up with him turning himself gold and Herc and company place him on an island on the back of a giant sea turtle as seen in that home video epic "Aladdin and the King of Thieves." Which, incidentally, is priced to own and makes a great gift for dads and grads. MINOS - (MY nohss): Cretan king who had Daedalus build the famous labyrinth to imprison his wife. MINOTAUR - (MIHN oh tor): The monster with the head of a bull on the body of a very hairy man. He was in the center of the labyrinth in the tale of Theseus, but the movie used him as a roaming, free-lance monster. We might accent the bull in his personality and play him as a blowhard chatterbox who despite his fierce looks is more likely to bore you to death with his dull tongue than his sharp horns. MOPSUS - (MAHP suhs): Known as the most remarkable soothsayer of his age, if he pops up in our series we'll have to find a way to distinguish him from the more famous Delphic Oracle. MORPHEUS - (MOR fee uhs): Another name for Hypnos, the god of sleep and the one we'll use in the series. MUSES: As patrons of the fine arts, muses were often perceived as promoters of the more civilized aspects of mortal existence. Nine in mythology, five on our show: Melopomene, tragedy; Terpsichore, dance; Clio, history; Thalia, comedy; Calliope, music. We'll use them as a framing device as in the feature, and they might actually interact with our guys when a situation calls for their specialty. MYRMIDONS - (MUR mih duhnz): What happens when army ants are transformed into men? They become this race of awesome warriors who have a taste for brown armor. NAIADS - (NAY uh deez): Nymphs found in fresh water. NARCISSUS - (nahr SIHSS uhs): In the feature he was inexplicably among the gods on Olympus. We can ignore that if we can find a suitable story for the original vain man. One caveat; the personality of Adonis is similar enough that we'd need a really compelling reason to use Narcissus. NAUPLIUS - (NAH plih uhs): Jason's navigator. NEMEAN LION - (NEE mee uhn): The subject of Hercules' first labor, this beast was as large as an elephant with teeth like ivory daggers and claws like bailing hooks. It terrorized mountain villages, eating whoever had the nerve to leave their house. It's hide could not be pierced by arrows so Hercules strangled it. NEMESIS - (NEHM uh sihs): Known as the goddess of vengeance to those who suffer under her, Nemesis punishes those who are not suitably grateful to the gods when they enjoy good fortune. She is described as wearing a whip and carrying an applewood wheel to symbolize turning. We'll use her as a cool assassin and dispenser of revenge, feared by even the most mighty of warriors and kings. She's ruthless and effective, but an interesting villainess in that her targets usually deserve some punishment, just not as severe as she prefers. NEPENTHE - (nee PEHN thee): A magic potion composed of one drop of water from Lethe (the river of forgetfulness) and a cup of nectar. It was said to ease suffering and make someone temporarily forget their troubles. NEREIDS - (nee REE uh deez): Mermaid sea nymphs who served as ladies in waiting to Amphitrite. They were also said to have smoothed the voyage of the Argo. NEREUS - (NEE ruhs): He knows where the bodies are buried and he'll tell all... if you can catch him. Nereus is a sea god that only tells the truth and is reputed to know all secrets and all hiding places. Just to make things interesting, he's also an expert shape shifter, taking the form any sea creature. Hercules encountered him to find the location of Hera's golden apples, chasing him through countless incarnations until the old man told him the secret. We could play him as annoyingly coy, getting undue joy out of pulling the chain of anyone who needs his knowledge. NESSUS - (NEHS uhs): Centaur killed by Hercules. Covered in the feature, so not really useful to us. NIKE - (NY kee): Winged goddess who flew about the battlefield rewarding the victors with glory. She had alabaster skin, snowy wings and golden hair. Whether we can make any sly allusions to certain athletic shoe remains to be seen. Maybe we could play her rewards as endorsement deals. NYMPHS - (NIHM'fs): Daughters of the gods. Covered in all variations elsewhere here, they are identified with field, stream, forest and sea. They personify sensual joys of nature -- especially to Phil. NYX - (nihks): Darkness personified, she had a gloomy and violent nature that matched her black robed appearance. And a cool sounding name too! ODYSSEUS - (oh DIHS ee us): More than anyone, we'll plunder his exploits and plug Herc into the adventures. If Odysseus appears at all it might be as some sort of Hero emeritus and former student of Phil's. OEDIPUS - Yeah, right. Though we might make a sly reference with a troubled youth at school that everyone calls "Ed." OMPHALE - (AHM fuh lee): In one of his stranger exploits, Hercules was commited to this Queen as a slave. She forced him to wear dresses and do "women's work." This lasted until her land was attacked and Herc had to lose the housecoat and get busy. Another tale in the "good luck if you can use this" catagory. ONEICOPOMPUS - (oh nee co POM pus): Name for Hermes as a conductor of dreams. We wouldn't use Hermes, but we'll surely do a dream-gimmick episode, so this might come in handy there. ORION - (oh RY uhn): Said to be the handsomest man alive (maybe by Greek People magazine). While we seem to have covered that territory with Adonis and others, in some versions Orion is a giant. Maybe we could play him like a nine foot tall Gaston, puffing up his macho lady killer bravado to ludicrous levels. Adonis could look up to him (literally and as hero worship) as the gold standard of male perfection. One possibility would be to play him as a Tony Robbins style motivational speaker that tries to pump up Herc to his "thrill of the hunt" world view. ORPHEUS - (OR fee uhs): Ancient Greece's greatest poet and musician. His songs were said to have the power to make wild animals circle around peacefully to listen and even trees would uproot themselves to get closer. He was along for the ride with Jason, though our ship might be full enough for those stories. We hope to lure a bona fide rock or pop star to play him and model his personality to the voice. ORTHOS - Two headed giant Cyclops son of Echidna. Always trying to please mom; always fails. Voiced by Brad Garrett and Wayne Knight. OTUS - Poseidon's giant idiot fish-faced son. The comedy writes itself. PAN: The god of shepherds and goatherds. We'll play him as Phil's country cousin and the king of the satyrs. According to Phil, "Pan has the touch." Even with his bumpkin personality and Olympian gut, nymphs flock to him and hang on his ever simple minded word. Herc and the audience share the same puzzlement over Phil's reverence for his loutish leader. PANDORA - (pan DOH ruh): Her famous box was actually a jar that Hermes gave her with the caveat that it must never be opened. But she had world class curiosity and couldn't resist. The jar released all of the spites that would torment mortals, including Old Age, Labor, Sickness, Insanity, Vice, and Passion. In some versions the one thing left was Hope. In others she manages to close the jar before Foreboding escapes, saving the world from the despair that would come with them knowing their fates. If we wanted to play more than the key episode, we might focus on her insatiable curiosity, pumping it up to comic extremes. We might even play the story where foreboding does leak out of the jar. PARIS - Helen's famous lover and Trojan warrior. If he appears in our series at all, we might highlight his skills as an archer. PEIRENE - (py REE nee): A sacred spring whose crystal waters were aid to inspire poets. PENELOPE - (pee NEHL oh pee): The model wife in Greek mythology. On Mentor's advice she held off a hundred suitors by telling them she could not marry until she completed weaving an alter cloth. Each night she would undo her work so the cloth would never be complete until her true husband, Odysseus, returned. We could use her for a fun cameo, perhaps having Herc follow miles of scarf leading to the ever knitting Penelope. Or we could catch up with her on the day that her long suffering patience wears thin and she's getting a little punchy. PERICLES - Statesmen, orator and general, considered the greatest of all Athenians. For the purposes of our series, he's the "mayor" of Athens. PERICLYMENOUS - (pehr ih KLY mee nuhs): The original "manimal." In his famous battle with Hercules he transformed from bull to lion to serpent to a bee the size of an eagle. A vivid, tenacious fellow, our challenge is to differentiate him from other shape shifters in the series. PERSEPHONE - (pur SEHF oh ne): The daughter of Demeter, kidnapped by Hades in the famous myth of the seasons. She was said to have a magic paint box which she used to add color to the world. PERSEUS - (PUR see uhs): The golden boy of mythology. We might plunder his exploits for Herc. For example, Perseus' quest for the head of Medusa is full of gimmicks that could fuel entire episodes. There's the magic wallet, the helmet of invisibility and the winged sandals he borrowed from some Nymphs. The rescue of Andromeda is another episode that could be co-opted for our Hero. PHAEA - (FEE uh): A blood thirsty robber woman who was said to haunt the mountain roads. She was also said to be able to turn into a tusky sow when attacked. PHAETON - (FAY uh thuhn): Disaster ensued when this reckless son of Apollo borrowed his dad's sun chariot. First he set the earth on fire by flying too close to impress his friends, then freezing the country when he reared back up in the cosmos. We might let Herc have this learning experience. PHANTASTUS - (fan TAS tus): The god of dreams. PHLEGETHON - (FLEHG eh thuhn): Underworld river of fire reserved for sinners. PHOENIX - Legendary bird that rises from its own funeral pyre. PITTHEUS - (PIHT thoos): Considered one of the most learned men of his day. PLEIADES - (PLEE uh deez): Seven daughters of Atlas who became a constellation after his death. We might play the star formation as a talking, sentient being who guides sailors in distress. POLITES - (poh LY teez): Cool name, huh? POLYDEUCES - (pahl ih DOO seez): Castor's boxing brother. POLYHYMNIA - (pahl ih HIHM nih uh): Muse of song and geometry. POLYPHEMUS - (pahl ih FEE muhs): Cyclops outwitted by Odysseus. POLYXENA - (poh LIHK see nuh): Beautiful Princess who knew Achilles secret weakness and led to his downfall. POSEIDON - (poh SY duhn): God of the sea. In our show he is just below his brothers Zeus and Hades in power. Neither good guy or bad, like the sea itself his disposition is liable to shift without warning and what lies below the surface is largely unfathomable. Unlike Hades corporate raider mentality, Poseidon interferes in human affairs more for fun than a concrete goal. He's content with his domain, but restless to flex the power that the sea offers him. He can create a life sustaining spring or a furious flood. He is proudly independent of the struggle between his brothers and under the right circumstances, even they are deferential to him. Pretty much a loon, on minute he'll threaten a ship with a monsoon, the next he'll be boring the sailors to tears with his old stories ("Interesting thing about the dolphin was I set out to make a fish, but went mammal instead.") We may also use him for all of the coarse womanizing that we can't get away with on Zeus, not that he's good at it, but he keeps trying. He should be a vivid character who can be as comic as he is dangerous. PRIAPUS - An ugly child with enormous genitals. Isn't mythology neat? PROCRUSTES - (proh KRUHS teez): He ran an inn with a bed that fit no man. His novel solution was to either stretch or chop the lodgers to fit the bed. Imagine the comic antics when Herc and the gang check in! PROMETHEUS - (proh MEE thee uhs): This Titan was tradtitionally portrayed as angering Zeus by giving fire to mankind. In punishment he was chained to a rock where a vulture pecked out his liver every day and every night it grew back. Hercules freed him from this cycle of agony. If he appears in our series it could be as a gregarious fellow with a million oft-told tales of his exploits in taming mankind. PROTEUS - Name meaning "first man." PSYCHE - (SY kee): A girl so beautiful that she elicited the envious wrath of Aphrodite. When the goddess sent Cupid on a nasty mission, he scratched himself with his own arrow and fell hard. Complications ensued. PYGMALION - (pihg MAY lee uhn): Sculptor who fell in love with a beautiful statue he created. Aphrodite took pity on him and when he kissed the marble, the statue came alive. Her name was Galatea. PYGMIES - These tiny Egyptian dwafs figure in a Hercules story where they lay seige on him in a "Gulliver" manner. PYRRHA - (PIHR uh): Wife of Deucalion, she helped him repopulate the earth after the flood. PYTHON - (PY thuhn): Enormous serpent killed by Apollo's golden arrows. RHEA - (REE uh): Wife of Cronus, mother of Zeus. Doubtful that she'd show up in the series. RHOECUS - (REE kuhs): Young woodsmen who's hunt for honey led him to save a dryad that fell in love with him. Did we mention that the honey was for his toothless mother? And that through a misunderstanding the Dryad ultimately killed him and herself? And, finally, the two were transformed into bears? RIPHEUS - (RIHF oos): A really huge and mean Centaur. RUMOR - (ROO mur): Malicious little minx who took great pleasure darting about whispering tales to all who would listen. She didn't care if they were true or false as long as they were damaging. Obviously a good candidate for our lower tier villains, inspiration in casting will dictate how much we see of her. Possibly a member of the student ranks. SALMACIS - (SAL muh sihs): A magical fountain. Whoever drank of its waters suddenly found themselves seized with a sudden preference for their own sex. Imagine if Priapus and Hermaphroditus drank up here! Talk about comic antics! Okay, maybe not. SALMONEUS - (sal MOH nee uhs): Arrogant king who once posed as Zeus, banging pots and throwing torches to simulate thunderbolts. Not amused, Zeus hit him with a real thunderbolt, killing him instantly. He ended up with Hades, spending eternity roasting on a spit. For our show, we might just keep the name in mind for a con man character whose specialty is impersonating the gods very badly (though his gullible audiences probably buy it for awhile.) SATYR - In our series Phil and Pan will probably fill our quota of horny goat men, but then again, how many is too much? SCIRON - (SY ruhn): Maybe the Greek storytellers got punchy by the time they got to "S." This guy would force travelers to wash his feet while seated on a natural throne on a cliff face. When his victim finished, Sciron would kick him off the cliff into the jaws of a giant turtle waiting down below. You can't make this stuff up... well, actually I guess they could. SCYLLA - (SIHL uh): This sea monster was beautiful from the waist up, if you could ignore the six ravenous dog heads that ringed around her and jutted out to eat whoever got too close. Worked in tandem with Charybidis to terrorize Odysseus and eat some of his crew. SEASONS - Sisters Thallo (sprouting) and Carpo (withering) personified the cycle of change. The dichotomy might make for vivid guest characters. SEVEN SAGES OF GREECE - Solon, Thales, Pittacus, Bias, Chilon, Cleobulus and Periander, Tyrant of Corinth. Story most connected with them is that of a golden tripod, dropped by Helen that was supposed to be given to the wisest man in Greece. They passed it from one to another, each wise enough to know he wasn't the wises man. Eventually it was dedicated to Apollo. For our series we'd probably get the most mileage out of using the phrase as to denote an intelligence frame of reference - i.e. "He's not exactly seven sage material, is he?" SINIS - (SI nihs): Giant who would tie travelers to two bent trees, which would tear the victims in half when released. Why did anyone go traveling in those days? SIRENS - Three sisters who were beautiful women with bird's wings. Their enchanting singing would lure sailors to their doom on rocky shores. Odysseus stuffed wax in his ears to avoid that fate. A definite for our series, the challenge is to get more than the one incident from them. One possibility is that they lure sailors not to thier death but to their debt on a wild Vegas-style island. SISYPHUS - (SIHS ih fuhs): Known as the guy rolling a boulder up a mountain for all of eternity. This was his punishment for twice cheating death. We'll paint him in broad comic strokes as a cameo character who is liable to pop up anywhere, out of breath, but doggedly pushing his rock. SPHINX - A monster that looked like a winged lion with a maiden's face and a serpents tail. Death came to any traveler (another challenge to the Grecian tourist board) who could not answer one of the Sphinx's riddles. We're thinking that we'll play the creature like its dreaded modern equivalent -- the game show host. "Sphinx Martindale" if you will. STENTOR - (STEHN tor): A brass-voiced warrior whose war cry was louder than the shout of sixty men. Even casual conversation sounds like he's announcing a stock car race. "I AM WHISPERING," would be a frequent ear shattering protest. STYMPHALIAN BIRDS - (stihm FAY lih uhn): The most terrible winged creatures in the world (if you don't count certain dragons.) They ate everything, but their favorite food was -- OoooWeeeOooo -- MAN! Hercules' sixth labor was to exterminate these pests. The task was complicated by the bird's quicksand muddy hill home. He scared them awake with a huge rattle he borrowed from Hephaestus, then twisted their necks as they dove at him with their armor piercing beaks. And that, my friends, is what separates the heroes from the zeroes. STYX - The name of the Underworld's river of the dead and the nymph who presides over it. SYRINX - (SIHR ingkx): Chaste Nymph persued by Pan. She turned herself into a reed to escape him. We might use the name for a too pure to be for real Nymph who Phil falls for. TALARIA - (tuh LAY rih uh): The name of Hermes' winged sandals. Not that anyone really would care. TALUS - (TAY luhs): A living bronze statue with the head of a bull who stood as an "indestructible" sentry on the isle of Crete. Whenever a ship approached, he would hurl huge boulders at it, driving it off. His weakness lied in the single vein that carried blood from head to foot, where it was sealed with a bronze pin. When the pin was removed, he drained into a heap of scrap. TANTALUS - (TAN tuh luhs): Wicked, nasty fellow whose eternal punishment is the root of the word "tantalize." Denied food and water, he was doomed to stand in a stream that went dry whenever he tried to drink, under an apple tree with fruits that were always just out of reach. If nothing else, we might inflict this predicament upon our heroes. TEIRESIAS - (tih REE sih uhs): Staple in Greek drama as a foreshadowing device, this blind seer could function in our series in the same way. He could be a mentor to Cassandra in the soothsaying arts. He could be a raving lunatic. He could be completely irrelevant to our series. If we could see the future, we'd let you know. TELCHINES - Dog headed, flippered children of the sea. TEUMESSIAN VIXEN - Does her real story matter with a great name like this? For the record she was a creature who was fated to never be caught. A paradox occurred when the Laelaps hound, who was fated to catch every quarry, was set upon her. TERPSICHORE - (turp SIHK oh ree): Muse of dance. THALIA - (thuh LY uh): Muse of comedy. THERSITES - (thur SY teez): Loudmouthed, troublemaker soldier who enjoyed cheering enemies and jeering heroes. He did this once too often when Achilles killed him with one punch. THESEUS - (THEE see uhs): One of the greatest Greek heroes. Fodder for Hercules adventures in our show. Read all about it! The Library of Congress recommends... TRITON - Part man, part dolphin. Not Ariel's daddy in our show. TYPHON - (TY fuhn): The largest, most grotesque and most feared of all creatures. He had the head of an ass (no report on what kind of ass he had) and serpent's heads for hands. Most of the gods ran when he came to Olympus. We'll probably have to scale him back in power a bit to fit the world of our series, but he could still be one of the most formidable of monsters. One that even Hades is reluctant to deal with. XANTHUS - (ZAN thus): Twin stallion to Balius, one of the magical steed owned by Achilles. Not only could they speak most eloquently, in the heat of battle they would unyoke themselves and fight at their master's side. ZEPHYRUS - (ZEHF ur uhs): The West Wind and the most kindly of the four. ZEUS - (ZOOS): In our series he'll be a far cry from the colorful, lusty lout in mythology, but we should push him and look for edges beyond the basic Disney dad of the feature. 37