Strangers With Candy was originally going to be called" THE WAY AFTER SCHOOL SPECIAL"
The Show's Premise
Welcome Freshmen!
Welcome to Flatpoint High, this is a school for the future "Jerry Springer" sad sacks.
First up is Jerri Blank, a 46 year-old freshman back on campus after 32 years as a runaway, "user, boozer and loser"
Jerri looks like a distant relative of Swoosi Kurtz in Tammy Faye Baker makup and clothes that tossed out by the Goodwill Thrift Shop.
In addition to Jerri, there is Flatpoint High's Principal Blackman who is a stentorian despot, The teachers are sexually ambigous and active. Jerri's best friend is most affectionately called "Pan-Faced Chimp." Then at home, Jerri's social-gadfly step mom(her real mother killed herself when Jerri ran away years ago) her corpse-like Dad, and a step-brother who lives to taunt Jerri.
Those of you who are new to this august institution should be advised that we here at Flatpoint High have little tolerance for those of you who are new to this august institution. If we could get away with not letting any of you shinny, moon-faced freshman into the school each year, we would do so with one stupendous smile on our happy, beaming, joy-smeared faces. But fortunatly we do need a bubbling pool of mindless primordial ooze to draw from a populate our sophomore, junior and senior classes.
You freshman are our filthy but necessary ooze, and for that alone we welcome you. But take heed! During your first year here, I will be watching each and every one of you with an eagle eye and a raven's eye. And I will not tolerate any kind of behavior at all.
However, I do hope you enjoy your time here! Please feel free to stop by my office and say hello. Don't touch anything.
Good Luck
Principal Blackman
