He was afraid he had forced her to 'Be Patient" for too long though. She had almost developed a sort of coolness towards him and seemed to go to great lengths to avoid him. Even now, she was out on a mission and they hadn't spoken privately in over 3 days. It was her third mission as Mission Leader. She seemed to be handling the job quite well. He shook off the weird sense of impending doom that overcame him and set his attention back on his computer. He had almost managed to block thoughts of Nikita entirely from his mind when Walter burst in:
"Michael! Come quick...to Medlab.....it's Nikita!" With that Walter turned on his heel and started to exit Michael's office. Michael was much quicker than the older man and he caught Walter before he got any further down the corridor.
"What is it? What is wrong with her?"
Walter just looked at him and closed his eyes. Michael felt his heart stop. As the two men arrived at the medical lab there was a flurry of activity and equipment was being wheeled around Nikita at a frantic pace. As the staff worked around her, cutting her clothing away where needed, cleaning the blood from her wounds, he noticed that they were cutting her hair.....Why would they need to do something like that? As he moved closer for a better look his breath caught in his throat......
Nikita was lying deathly still, blood still flowing freely from a horrific wound to her head right above her left ear. She had cuts and scratches all over her face and arms, along with what looked to be a broken leg.....he could actually see something protruding from the wound on her leg........he didn't even want to think what it might be..... As the color drained from his face Walter came up behind him and put a hand on his shoulder.
"I know it looks bad. Nikita is strong...I am sure she'll pull through."
Pull through!?! Michael thought in horror! What in the devil had happened out there!! He moved a little closer for a final inspection and prepared himself for the worst. As the staff continued to move around her prepping her for surgery, he felt as if time were standing still........
**********
The hours in surgery seems never-ending. As Michael paced the halls of Section his mind and heart were in turmoil......he kept thinking back.... What if he hadn't brought her back *in*? What if he hadn't asked her to *be patient*? What if he had taken Jurgen's place? Would any of this have made a difference? Would any of it have made Nikita happy? As he paced he was oblivious to those around him. Operations and Madeline stood in The Perch and watched Michael prowl around Section like a caged animal.
"This is not good. He is coming unhinged...." Operations said.
"I agree." Maddy answered. "Something will have to be done."
Michael kept prowling around, a crazed look in his eyes. He didn't even notice Birkoff until he almost ran smack into him .
"Michael? It's Nikita....she's...well...."
"Yes? What?? Is she Okay?"
"Well...she survived the surgery. But....now she's in a...coma."
Michael came to an abrupt halt. A Coma? Why? For how long? What was wrong? He just looked at Birkoff with his eyes glazed over and then side-stepped him and made short the distance to Medlab. He found Nikita in her room. As he watched her through the window he couldn't stop the fear from rising up in his soul....
What if he truly lost her this time? As the feeling gelled in the pit of his stomach he pushed his way through the door and walked over to her bedside. She lay so very still on the stark-white sheets. She had almost no color in her face and her skin, what showed through the bandages, was bruised and swollen.
Her hair had been cut away on the left side and her wound was bandaged from the surgery. They had also had to drill 2 small holes at the base of her skull to relieve pressure to her brain. She was attached to so much machinery that Michael didn't know what he could possibly touch just to assure himself that she was still with him.. in body...if not in spirit. He reached a hesitant hand out and lifted her hand off of the bed. As he looked at her fingers he felt a tear slip past the corner of one eye. He brushed it away quickly and impatiently.
************
He had finally found out what had happened on the mission.......
Everything was progressing as planned. The target had been acquired and the charges had been set. As they group was making their egress Nikita had noticed a small child on the sidelines of the perimeter. As she made her way to the child to remove him from harm, the blast had knocked them into a nearby culvert. Nikita took the full force of the impact and shielded the child with her own body. The child, who was unharmed, was taken to a shelter.
As Michael looked down at Nikita he felt all the things he had ever wanted to say to her rise up in his throat. He looked at her face. He reached a trembling hand over to stroke across one eyebrow, still scabbed from the wounds. He moved his hand back to his side and looked around for a chair. He found a chair and pulled it up to her bedside. Not knowing whether or not Nikita could hear him, he spoke softly.
"My Nikita. I am heartbroken to see you so. I want you to come back to me. I want things to be right between us. I want to court you and marry you.....
************
As Michael sat stroking Nikita's hand he asked the question that was burning in his heart.
"Nikita? Will you Marry Me?"
Nothing. Not even a flinch of her fingers. As he continued to stroke her hand he spoke softly to her, willing her to hear him: "Nikita....I want you to be with me always. I have always wanted us to be together. I pledge that these be my vows to you:
" I'll be your dream, I'll be your wish. I'll even be your fantasy."
"Your hope....your love....every- thing that you need me to be. I love you with every breath. I love you madly... deeply....truly I do."
"I will be strong....faithful......and true. I will, because I am counting on you and our new beginning, our reason for living, and a deeper meaning for our lives. I pledge this to you...can't you see? You don't have to close your eyes...I'm right here before you. All that you need will surely come."
"Please Nikita..please say you'll be mine." As he continued to stroke her hand he let his mind drift away into the past.
He saw Nikita as a new recruit......training her, shaping her, trying to break her...and knowing all the while that he loved her. He loved her fight, her spunk, her drive and will to survive. He remembered the many times he had hurt her.....on Section's orders. Sometimes for her own good. Now look at them. They might never have another chance. As he turned his face to gaze upon her once again he felt her fingers move slightly. He held his breath and looked down at their laced fingers and squeezed her hand slightly. He felt her fingers move again on his. He reached his hand over and stroked her bruised and battered cheek very lightly:
"Nikita? Can you hear me? " As he spoke she stirred very slightly.
He looked closely at the monitors to see if they registered any change. Nothing that he could see. He then cast his eyes back on Nikita's face. What he saw stopped his heart. She had opened one eye....one lone, bloodshot eye. She was looking straight ahead and seemed to not know he was there.
He moved to stand in front of her so she could see that he was there. Nothing...no register....not even a blink. Michael felt himself break into a cold sweat. As he moved closer to her he could see that her pupil was fixed and dialated. She sat staring with that eye for a few moments more before lapsing back into her catatonic state.
He resumed his position on the chair at her bedside.....thinking on what might have been....could have been.....could possibly still be.
***********************
Michael could hear voices in the distance. Why was everyone yelling at him? He lifted his head to see what was going on... As Walter burst into his office he had a look of dread on his weathered face.
"Michael! Come quick...it's Nikita!!"
As Michael stood.....he realized it had all been a dream.....or was it??