by Jera
RECAP: Liz had an accident the night she was supposed to go back to PC for Christmas vacation. Lucky stayed by her side till she woke up after surgery. They realized that Liz can't see.
The air frozen still around them once the words were out of Liz's mouth. The tears started down Liz's cheek as Lucky's heart wrenched.
Liz: What's happened to me? Lucky? Why can't I move my arms and my right leg? Why can't I see? Why can't I see you?
Her voice broke as she questioned. First to Lucky, then more to herself. Lucky took her face in his palms, and tried keeping his hands as steady as he could. And much to his grimace, failed. He stared into Liz eyes. They are still the most beautiful eyes in the world to him, but now they look past him instead of into him. Lucky shook his head, trying hard to swallow the pain that was sure to be found in his voice.
Lucky: Elizabeth, listen to me, baby. Let's not panic.....we'll talk to the doctor, we'll find out exactly what's going on, OK? It can't be permanent, It can't be. You'll be able to move your arms and right leg in no time too. The doctor said they'll be just fine. The casts will have to stay on for a couple of months, but once they come off, you'll be as good as new...........
Liz's sob had turned into howl as she buried her head in Lucky's chest. The only thing he could do was held her tightly in his arms, and tear up as he kissed the top of Liz's head again and again.
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The doctor had no explanation to Liz's blindness. None of the test they did showed any sign of damage to her brain or her eyes. The only explanation they could come up with was it's possible that her head had taken a strong impact when she fell, thus affected the occipital lobes in her back brain even though it doesn't show up on any test. No one could tell them if this was permanent. The only thing they were sure of was that the longer Liz remains blind, the less likely she'll ever recover her vision.
Liz was in the hospital for two weeks. She had seemed to accepted the possibility that she might not be able to see ever again. Nikolas went back to the spiral stairs where she fell and checked the stairs after he learned of Liz's blindness. When he found the trace of oil on the steps, he went straight to Lucky and told him about the notes Liz had been getting. It was hard for Lucky to keep his calm after that. Someone had wanted to hurt Liz. Someone had wanted to hurt Liz because she was important to him. He had never imagined something like this could happen when he got into the music business.
It wasn't hard to find out who out the oil on the steps. Liz knew for sure there wasn't anything on the steps when she walked up there.
Nikolas and Lucky went to the police with the facts, asking them to investigate.
Angela was arrested two days later. She had put the oil on the steps on her way down when she left Liz up there. There were still magazines in her room with random cutouts missing from them. She had been at the concert in Philadelphia, and knew who Liz was even though Liz had never told her about Lucky. The only thing Angela said after confessing was that she never meant for it to go as far as causing Liz to go blind.
It wasn't good enough for Lucky.
With his ignorance, he had put Liz on stage, under the spotlight, not knowing how much pain it was going to cause her.
He would never forgive himself.
Liz came back to Port Charles after she was out of the hospital. In silent agreement, Laura had went to NYU and made arrangement for Liz to go on leave for an unspecified amount of time. They still haven't been able to contact Liz's parents and Sarah. They have apparently gone on another trip to Africa, and no one really knew exactly where they were at a certain time.
Liz had seemed all right. She still had to spend most of her time on her bed since the casts were still on. She kept the music on in her room at all time, though it was on low most of the time. Lucky stayed with her most of the time. They talked about things that happened in school their first semester in college, they talked about how Lulu had grown 2 inches this past few months, they talked about everything except what happened to Liz. Neither wanted to bring it up. Lucky didn't tell Liz that he had went to talk to V and told her that he wasn't going to do another album. He couldn't do it knowing everything Liz went through had been because of him. V didn't try to talk him out of it. For that, he was grateful. She only said that he's welcome to come back anytime to finish the remaining 8 months of their contract. Lucky didn't know how V was going to explain it to Jax, but he didn't care. Liz has to come first. Especially right now.
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Liz sat by the window, the music off, trying to listen to the snow falling outside. Lulu had told her about the snow. Port-Charles hadn't been very cold this winter, it hadn't snowed as much. She remembered how she and Lucky danced in the snow just not so long ago. That was the best Christmas she'd ever had in her life.
Her casts had came off a couple days ago. Her arms and legs are indeed just fine, like the doctor had told her. She was also still blind. She had never realized how important her eyes were to her. She had never realized that she needs her eyes for everything she loves to do. She knows the house well enough to get around on her own even though most of the time Lucky is hovering over her. But other than that, she couldn't paint, she couldn't cook, she couldn't even make tea for herself without burning her hands.
The knock on the door broke the gentle silence. Liz turned toward the door.
Liz: Come in.
She heard the door opened with a little squeak she'd never noticed before her eyes went blind. Instantly she knew it was Lucky. The careful, and quiet way he opened and closed the door was completely different from Lulu's loud operation of the door. Laura is quiet too, but she usually waits a few seconds before she closes the door. Lucky doesn't.
Lucky: Hey.
Liz: Hey. It's snowing outside.
Lucky walked over and sat down by her.
Lucky: Yes, it is. It's ......beautiful.
Liz: I...imagine so.
Lucky bit his lips as he turned to look at Liz. She didn't flinch. Other than the few times she had cried in the hospital, she gave no sign of grieving for the lost of her vision. He wanted to tell her that it's OK to show her sadness in front of him. He wanted to tell her it's OK for her to cry. Yet, saying that would bring up the subject that has been eating him away in his heart.
She was blind. And he was at least partially responsible if not completely.
Lucky: The music is off in here.
Liz: Yeah. When Lulu told me it was snowing, I wanted to hear the snow falling.
Lucky: Elizabeth......
Liz: Lucky, you don't have to tip toe around the subject. I'm blind. I know it, and you know it. And.....I'm OK.
Lucky could hear himself swallow hard.
Liz: Lucky?
Lucky: I..... wasn't sure if you wanted to talk about that.
Liz: I suppose there really isn't anything to talk about but to wait. All the doctors said so. And if my vision never comes back, I'll just have to learn to live with it.
Lucky: Elizabeth, I'm sorry.
Liz: It's not your fault.
Lucky's face twitched painfully, much like when Liz discovered that she couldn't see. His silence alarmed Liz. Why wasn't he saying anything to what she just said?
Liz: Lucky, It's not your fault. Are you thinking it's your fault? It's not!
Lucky: She couldn't have known who you were if I didn't sang to you on that stage.
Liz searched for Lucky's hands and held on to them tightly.
Liz: Lucky, don't you dare! She was the one that caused the fall. Not you! Don't you dare regret one of the most beautiful thing anyone has ever done for me! She would have found out eventually. I didn't announce it to just anybody, but I didn't try to keep it a secret either.
Lucky: It might have been prevented if she had found out later rather than sooner.........
Liz: Lucky, you can't think like that. It's no use to think about what might have been.......I can't think about what might have been if I had told somebody about those notes. I can't think about what might have been if I had said no to her request of helping with the strike. I just CAN'T think about those!! And neither should you be think of those things! It doesn't change anything!
Liz stood up and started pacing around the room, her tears were coming down fast and furious. Lucky wanted to stop her, but she wouldn't let him. She kept on circling the room while she kept on talking.
Liz: I can't think about it! Or I'll just go crazy! It happened! It happened! There is nothing I can do about it! I can't see, I can't paint, I can't even go out on the street by myself. If I think about all the 'what might have beens', I'll never stop! I have to be strong! I can't rely on you to take care of me every single minute of the day! I can't. Lucky.......I can't......Lucky............And I don't want you to be blaming yourself for this. It's not your fault. It's not........
Lucky caught her in his arms and steadied her. He kissed her lips and tasted the salty tears that was her sorrow, and confusion. They tasted the same as his own.
Lucky kept on caressing her hair as he talked chockingly.
Lucky: Oh, baby......tell me what I can do. Tell me what I can do to help you.......l'll do anything......I'll do anything.........you can cry on me, hit me, anything you want.......just tell me how I can help you....because I don't know what you need.........if you don't want me taking care of you every single minute......What else can I do?
Liz: Oh, I don't know......Lucky..... I can't even see the snow.....I don't know......I just want to cry my heart out right now........I need to.....I just need to......
Lucky: OK, baby, just let it out........just let it out........
The tears that was restrained inside of them now came rushing out after weeks of silence.
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Liz decided to learn Braille. She couldn't stand a lifetime spending on only waiting for other people to do everything for her, hoping she will be able to see again soon. She has to start doing something for herself. And reading is a good start because she can do it by herself once she learned it. Lucky found a tutor through one of his professors in school to come over to the house twice a week. With nothing else on her schedule, Liz learned so fast, and found herself developed a love for books, which really surprised herself. Lucky still wanted to help her with everything, but tried hard to tell himself that what Liz wanted was more important. And She wanted to learn to be independent again.
When the end of second semester marked the end of Lucky's freshman year in college, Liz was graduating from reading fairy tales and other books for young kids to literature. The beginning of summer was looking better than the winter that had passed. Lucky writes his music while Liz studies Braille. They have picnics in the park, they take Lulu swimming after she took a swimming class. Lucky could feel himself falling more and more in love with Liz while watching her learn to do things for herself, and embrace life more than anyone he'd known.
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Liz had just finished dressed when she heard Lucky calling her name outside of her door.
Liz: Lucky, come in.
Lucky: That's OK, I just want to tell you that I'll be gone for the morning, but I'll be back. We'll go out after that, OK?
Liz: OK.........Lucky....Lucky?
The running footsteps told her that Lucky had left. Liz's forehead wrinkles in confusion.
Liz: Good morning to you too..........
She mumbled to herself, shook her head with a smile, and ready to start her day.
When Lucky came back to the house around 1 o'clock in the afternoon, Liz was waiting for him on the porch, a book in her hand. Lucky smiled, stroke up the stairs, and picked Liz up from the swing, kissed her thoroughly. Liz's smile was bright and wide when Lucky finally put her down.
Liz: Having a good day, Spencer?
Lucky: And it's only getting better. You ready to go?
Liz: Yeah, you wanna go in there and tell your mom that we are leaving?
Without another word, Lucky stepped over to the door, swung the door open, and yelled.
Lucky: Mom, We are going out right now. See you later!
Liz was still giggling at Lucky's eagerness to leave twenty minutes later.
The surprise destination turned out to be the flat Lucky had took Liz to two and half years ago when they found out Liz would not have to testify in court because Tony had decided to plead guilty of rape. The pure pleasure of water splashing all over her body was just as thrilling as the first time she had been there. What she couldn't believe was that Lucky had secretly packed her swimming suit for her!
They spent the entire afternoon swimming and riding watercraft. Liz could practically feel her skin wrinkled by the time they got back on the boat. Lucky had driven the boat himself this time. She had been worried at first, but Lucky proven to be very skilled at it. She smiled at the thought of that. One thing she could always count on was Lucky's ability to surprise her. Even with little things like knowing how to drive a boat so well.
When the sun came down, Lucky wrapped himself and Liz together with a thick blanket. He described the sunset for Liz as well as he could find the words for while Liz just closed her eyes and saw it in her mind.
Lucky: OK, now the sun is almost half way beneath the mountain, the red and purple are scattered around it. The gold is on top of that, and around it.
Liz: Oh, I can see it. And the rest of the sky is also filled with different colors, right?
Lucky: Oh, Yeah, that's right. There's different layers of blue, and then some orange, some more purple, all mixed together!
They snuggled together, leaning on each other, holding hands, enjoying being with each other. Lucky looked over to Liz, watching her hair shining under the last bit of sun of the day, the tips of her mouth titled up into a beautiful smile, her eyes closed, her face was completely peaceful. He leaned down, brushed his lips lightly over her temple. Liz's smile got slightly wider as she felt Lucky's lips on her hair, her forehead, and finally on her lips. She turned fully toward Lucky, eagerly returning the passion she felt in Lucky's kiss. His tongue thrust into the private space in her mouth, tasting every inch of it. Liz felt her knees grew weak, and her mouth hot, She touched her tongue to Lucky's and heard Lucky's breathing grew rapid like her own. Lucky's fingers stoke her wet hair, and down her bare back, sending all her senses into mayhem. The blanket that was wrapped around them was now on the floor about them. Lucky drew a sharp breath when he felt Liz's mouth on his neck, making slow, sensual little circles. The hot traces of Liz's tongue nearly making Lucky's bloodstream explode. He pulled Liz's face back up and kissed her gently. His mouth finally rested beside her ear, whispering.
Lucky: I love you.
Liz: Oh, Lucky, I love you too.............
Lucky: I know you want to do things yourself, but I still want to take care of you.
Liz: Lucky..........
Lucky: Hear me out, Elizabeth, Please. I want to take care of you. I want to always be there for you, I want to love you forever. I want to be your eyes when you want me to. I want to tell you I love you ten million times a day. I want to see that smile on your face every chance I can. I want to see that little wrinkle you get on your nose when you are puzzled every time you do it, and kiss it. I want to watch you light up every time I surprise you...........Elizabeth.......I love you. I love you so much that it hurts when you are not around even when I know I'm going to see you the very next minute.
Liz: Oh, Lucky.............
Liz's voice choked full of happiness.
Lucky: Elizabeth, will you marry me?
Liz was now completely in shock when she felt Lucky slid down, and she could hear his knee hitting the floor board of the boat. He took her left hand in his, and she felt the cold metal that was apparent to be a ring on the tip of her ring finger. He didn't slid it onto her finger right away. She realized he was waiting for her to answer when all she could do was covering her mouth with her other hand, and felt the hot tears down her cheeks.
Lucky: Elizabeth, will you do me the honor of being my wife?
When Liz still didn't answer, Lucky spoke again.
Lucky: I wanted to ask you this question last Christmas. But with the accident and all, I just didn't think it was the right time. Elizabeth?
Liz knelled down beside him, the emotions overflowing her making it hard to speak. She could only nod her head repeatedly, and motion Lucky to put the ring all the way up her finger. Their hands were both so shaky that it took awhile for Liz to finally have the ring safely on her finger.
Lucky kissed Liz again and again, then pulled her into the warm embrace made of his arms. The sun had now completely disappeared as the first stars began to shine in the sky above them. Under the witness of the bright stars and the smiling moon, Lucky and Liz started another new journey together.
TO BE CONTINUED...............................
