I Still Know What You Did Last Summer

As reviewed by James Brundage

I was told, when I entered into the business of film criticism, that you have to find the bad in the good and the good in the bad. That your job is to be both pessimist and optimist, whatever the situation desires. But, you know, it's hard to be optimistic about a film where pretty much all of the theater groans at the end of it and is more fun making jokes about it than watching it. I suppose, though, that I can say this about ISKWYDLS (or I Still Know What You Did Last Summer, or ye movie with a title five words too long): it never once uttered the words "I'll be right back."

After all, it hit every other cliché in the book on its bad attempt at thrills in Paradise. Those who had sex died, the psychotic liars died, hell, they even stuck in a witch doctor casting spells on Julie's toothbrush to make things fun.

This time good old Captain Hook (aka Ben Willis) is alive and well (minus a hand) and on a tropical island enjoying himself... gutting people. Julie's there, of course, with her roommate (played by Brandy, my number one pick for people who should be gutted this year), Brandy's horny boyfriend Tyrell, and Julie's suitor, Will Benson. You have a psychotic bartender and an annoying hotel clerk and, by the way did I mention that Julie and co. are staying in the suites where murders occured? Writers, can you say "trite"?

Now, as far as horror goes, I have nothing against cliché. Cliché is the trademark of horror. If it's not cliché, it's either Dark Comedy (Scream, Scream2) or Noir Horror (Lost Highway, Jacob's Ladder, Se7en). I watch horror because I'm a violence happy 80s freak, who loves to laugh at the dumb things or use them as an excuse for a date. Having no date the night I saw it and therefore being forced to endure this incredibly cheesy movie with no ability for comic element, and nothing laughable about it, I had to resort to my own cracks which my neighbors found very annoying because, of course, they had dates.

I liked the first one, but, Williamson (as said in Scream 2, ironically) is right. Sequels suck. And, compadres, especially this one.