Patch Adams (1998, PG-13)

Directed by Tom Shadyac

Written by Steve Oedekerek

Starring Robin Williams, Monica Potter, Daniel London, Philip Seymour Hoffman, and Bob Gunton

As Reviewed by James Brundage (MovieKritic2000)

My main gripe with Mickey Blue Eyes was that it was using a new formula. Similarly, my main gripe with Patch Adams is that it is using an old formula. In fact, Patch Adams is using the old formula that annoys me most: the schlock based-on-a-true-story drama.

As a collective group, when we see the line "Based on a True Story", this is supposed to open the valves of our tear ducts. This is supposed to make the story believable, the characters likeable, even if it actually isn't and they aren't. We're supposed to give a damn when people in the movie die. We're supposed to hate to see them go. We're supposed to have a triumphant ending with some moral or another.

What a crock.

Whenever I see the line "Based on a True Story" in front of a movie, I want to cringe. Whenever I reach the highly pretentious ending which is often only missing an usher with a collection plate, I want to puke. Whenever the movie inevitably takes a turn for the worse, I get really sick and tired.

The problem with "Based on a True Story" versus "A True Story" (documentaries) is that whenever "Based on a True Story" exists, there become conflicts. We all know that the events displayed in the movie are complete fictional representations of events that weren't that interesting to begin with, and thus are completely blown out of a proportion. Whenever we enter the movie theatre we expect to have this "resounding human sympathy."

When was the last time anyone you know had "resounding human sympathy". This is the 90s, the Age de la Nihilist, and someone should clue studio executives in that nine out of ten of us don't really care unless you make us care. We see the news and only put up with the first ten minutes because a) it's mildly entertaining, b) we want a stock quote or the whether or something that comes later. I show my true cynicism when I say that I honestly believe that most people are apathetic, myself included, and will not care about a movie just because it says "Based on a True Story" in front of it.

If a movie is done well, if it draws me in and actually makes me care some way or another about the characters then I will actually have some sympathy, but I really don't much care about fictional representations of real people I never met.

Furthermore, I doubt I would care about Hunter "Patch" Adams were I to meet him. I have a sense of humor, and my sense of humor is juvenile… I'll admit that. But I do not go to a meat-packing convention and make a speech that begins "friends, cow men, bullshippers, lend me your steers." It's just not funny. Although I laud what the man did for modern health care, we still have a long way to go and his casual disregard of authority is the same behavior that most people call me a jerk for.

I make a call to studio heads: stop using "Based on a True Story" as a marketing ploy to conceal a bad movie. Yeah, we have the occasional Schindler's List and Alive which can bring you in to a true story, but those were strong movies. When you have a weak movie, don't tack on "Based on a True Story" and expect a result. It's an insult to our intelligence and its playing off of the guilt we feel when we should care but don't.