Emily: I've seen all of your movies.
Cameron: Both of them?

Glenn Close: This is Cameron's first nomination and he's in extremely good company. Tonight he joins fellow best actor nominee Paul Newman for "Coot", Clint Eastwood for "Codger", Michael Douglas for "Primary Urges" and Steven Segal for "Snowball in Hell".

Carl: Why are we talking about Howard?
Teacher: Cause he likes Dick, Carl.

Howard's mailman: Of course Howard is getting married, he's a man of his word. Is this national?
Peter Malloy: You bet.
Howard's mailman: Please, use your full zip codes.

Emily: You're what?
Flower girl: He's gay.
Emily: I heard him.

Emily: Is everybody gay?!