Bianca's friend: It's just a party.
Mr. Stratford: And hell is just a sauna.
Bianca: She's a mutant. What if she never dates?
Mr. Stratford: Then you'll never date. Oh, I like that.

Patrick: My arm around you.
Kat: You, covered in my vomit.

Patrick: Was that a yes!?
Kat: No!
Patrick: So that was a no?!
Kat: No!

Joey: You're concentrating hard considering it's gym class.
*Bianka lets go of arrow in wrong direction and hits the gym teacher*

Cameron: Are any of you interested in dating Katarina Stratford?
Kid: If we were the only people on earth and there were no goats. Are there goats?

Bianca: Daddy as you know it's the prom.
*the exercise thing flings away*

Kat: You aren't as vile as I thought you were.

Kat: Hemingway was an abusive white-male alcoholic who hung around with Picasso hoping to nail his leftovers.

Patrick: Why is everyone so hot for this girl? Has she got beer-flavored nipples?

Bianca: There's a difference between like and love. I mean I like my Skechers, but I love my Prada backpack.

Cameron to Bianca: I learned French for you!

Mr. Stratford: I'm down, I've got the 411, and you are not going out and getting jiggy with some boy, I dont care how dope his ride is!

Kat: Did Joey ever tell you that we went out?
Bianca: Oh, yeah?
Kat: In ninth, for a month.
Bianca: Why?
Kat: Cause he was, like, such a babe.
Bianca: But you hate him.
Kat: I hate him now.

Kat: Well, you know what they say!
Patrick: No, what do they say?

Bianca: Is it just me, or does this party all of a sudden suck?

Kat: Tell me something true.
Patrick: Something true...I hate bees.
Kat: No, something real. Something no one else knows.

I hate the way you talk to me
And the way you cut your hair.
I hate the way you drive my car.
I hate it when you stare.
I hate your big dumb combat boots
And the way you read my mind.
I hate you so much it makes me sick --
It even makes me rhyme.
I hate the way you're always right.
I hate it when you lie.
I hate it when you make me laugh --
Even worse when you make me cry.
I hate it when you're not around
And the fact that you didn't call.
But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you --
Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.

Mr. Stratford: I delivered a set of twins to a fifteen-year-old this morning. You know what she said to me?
Bianca: I'm a crack whore who should have made my skeezy boyfriend wear a condom?
Mr. Stratford: Close, but no. She said, "I should have listened to my father!"
Bianca: She did not.
Mr. Stratford: Well, that's what she would have said if she hadn't been so doped up.

Patrick: Cameron, do you like the girl?
Cameron: Yeah.
Patrick: And is she worth all this trouble?
Cameron: Well, I thought she was, but, you know...
Patrick: Well, she is or she isn't. First of all, Joey's not half the man you are. Secondly, don't let anyone ever make you feel like you don't deserve what you want. Go for it.

Mr. Stratford: Fathers don't like to admit when their daughters are capable of running their own lives. It means we've become spectators. Bianca still lets me play a few innings. You've had me on the bench for years. And when you go to Sarah Lawrence, I won't even be able to watch the game

Kat: You can't just buy me a guitar every time you screw up, you know.
Patrick: Yeah, I know. But there's always drums and a bass, and maybe even some day a tambourine.
Kat: And don't just think you can --
*Patrick kisses Kat and they embrace*

Joey: Shit Bianca! I'm shooting a nose spray ad tomorrow!
Bianca: That's for making my date bleed. That's for my sister. And that's for me!

Kat: How'd you get a tux at the last minute?
Patrick: Just something I had, you know. Lying around. Where'd you get the dress?
Kat: Just something I had, you know. Lying around.

Bianca: Bye Daddy!
Mr. Stratford: Stop. Turn. Explain.
Bianca: Okay, remember how you said I could date if Kat dated? Well, she found this guy, who's actually kind of perfect for her, which is actually kind of perfect for me, because Cameron asked me to the prom and I really wanted to go, and now that Kat went, I'm allowed to -- based on the aforementioned rule and it's previous stipulations, of course.
Cameron: Nice to meet you.
Bianca: Let's go.

Bianca: Can we for two seconds ignore the fact that you are severely unhinged and discuss my need for a night of teenage normalcy?
Mr. Stratford: And what's normal? Those damn Dawson's River kids, sleeping in each other's beds and whatnot?

Michael: The last party I went to was at Chuck E. Cheese, you want to talk about some good times, that was some fun, he he he.

Mr. Morgan: Yes Miss I have an opinion about everything?
Kat: Do you want this in Iambic Pentameter?
Mr. Morgan: You're not going to fight me on this?
Kat: No, I think it's a really good assignment.
Mr. Morgan: You're just messing with me aren't you?
Kat: No I'm really looking forward to writing it.
Mr. Morgan: Get out of my class!
Kat: What?
Mr. Morgan: Out, get out!
Joey: Thanks Mr. Morgan
Mr. Morgan: Shut up

Patrick: You're right, she's still pissed.
Michael: Sweet love, renew thy force!
Patrick: Hey! Don't say shit like that to me, people can hear you.
Cameron: Look, you embarrassed the girl, sacrifice yourself on the alter of dignity and even the score.
Michael: Listen, don't say shit like that to him, people can hear you.

Joey: Uh, Mr. Morgan, is there any chance we can get Kat to take her Midol before she comes to class?
Mr. Morgan: Some day, you're going to get bitched slapped and I'm not going to do a thing to stop it and Kat, I want to thank you for your point of view, I know how difficult it must be for you to over come all those years of upper middle class oppression, it must be tough, but the next time you storm the PTA crusading for better lunch meat or whatever you white girls complain about, ask them why they can't buy a book written by a black man.
Bob Marley freaks: That's right MON!
Mr. Morgan: Don't even get me started on you two.

Patrick: So what's your excuse?
Kat: For?
Patrick: For acting the way we do?
Kat: I don't like to do what people expect. Why should I live up to other people's expectations instead of my own?
Patrick: So, you disappoint them from the start and then you're covered, right?
Kat: Something like that.
Patrick: Then you screwed up.
Kat: How?
Patrick: You never disappointed me.

Mr. Stratford: Whoops? My insurance doesn't cover PMS!

Cameron: Oh, yeah, um, okay. I thought that we'd um, start with pronunciation, if that's alright with you.
Bianca: Not the hacking and gagging and spitting part, please. Cameron: Well, uh, there is an alternative.
Bianca: There is?
Cameron: Yeah, French food. We could eat some together, uh, Saturday night?
Bianca: You're asking me out? That's so cute. What's your name again?

Patrick: Who knocked up your sister?

Mr. Stratford: Hello Katarina, make anyone cry today?
Kat: Sadly, no, but it's only 4:30.

Mr. Stratford: Where's your sister going?
Katarina: She's meeting some bikers, big ones, full of sperm.
Mr. Stratford: Funny. So tell me about this dance. Was it hoppin'?
Kat: Parts of it.
Mr. Stratford: Which parts?
Kat: The part where Bianca beat the hell out of some guy.
Mr. Stratford: Bianca did what?
Kat: What's the matter, upset that I rubbed off on her?
Mr. Stratford: No, impressed.