Susan: You know, it's scary the way nobody stays together these days. Pretty soon there's going to be more divorces than marriages.
Sharon: Isn't that the truth.

Sharon: Most girls run after daddy because he's wealthy.
Vicki: Are you infuring that I'm marrying your father because of his money?
Sharon: If the shoe fits, wear it.

Miss Inch: Congratulations. In the history of this camp, that was the most infamous, the most disgusting, the most revolting display of hooliganism we have ever had.
Miss Grunecker: Rolling around like hooligans in front of our guests.
Miss Inch: And worst of all, two sisters who should be setting a good example.
Susan: We’re not sisters!
Sharon: I’ve never seen her before in my life.
Miss Inch: They are! Aren’t they?
Miss Grunecker: No ma’am. Just look-alikes.

Susan: It might be so scary that we just might be able to pull it off.
Sharon: Pull what of?
Susan: Switch places!
Sharon: Switch?

Verbena: You didn’t know what a good thing you had when you had it.
Mitch: Huh?

Grandpa Charles: My dear what are you doing?
Susan: Making a memory.
Charles: Making a memory?
Susan: All my life, when I’m quite grown up I will always remember my grandfather and how he smelled of tobacco and peppermint.
Grandpa Charles: Well, I’ll tell you what. I take the peppermint for my indigestion and as for the tobacco *looks around* to make your grandmother mad.

Miss Inch: *reading from index cards* Welcome to Camp Inch, new arrivals. I am your supreme commander here. My name is... *turns to the next card and continues reading* Miss Inch. *frowns, looks back at the previous card in confusion, then re-reads the new one* Oh, yes, Miss Inch.

Sharon: That's how true love creates its beautiful agony. All splendid lovers have just dreadful times! Uh, Peleus and Melicent... Daphnis and Chloë... History's just jammed with stories of lovers parted by some silly thing!