George: What's that smell? Is that your meatloaf.
Betty: It might be.

Jennifer: Look at me I'm pasty.

Skip: Hiya, Bud!
Bud: Hiya, Skip!
Skip: Hiya, Bud!
Bud: Hiya, Skip!
Skip: Bud, can I ask you a question?
Bud: Sure.
Skip: Well, if I was to go up to your sister... What I mean is, if I was to go up to Mary Sue...
Bud: Oh my God... are we in that episode?

Betty: Mary Sue?
Jennifer/Mary Sue: Yeah?
Betty: What goes on up at Lover's Lane?
Jennifer/Mary Sue: What do you mean?
Betty: Well, you hear these things lately...kids spending so much time up there. Uh, is it holding hands? That kind of thing?
Jennifer/Mary Sue: Yeah! That and...
Betty: What?
Jennifer/Mary Sue: It doesn't matter.
Betty: No, I wanna know.
Jennifer/Mary Sue: Well, sex.
Betty: Oh. What sex?

George: Honey I'm home. Where's my dinner.

Betty: How about some Marshmellow Squares?
George: They're swell.

Jennifer/Mary Sue: Can I ask you a question?
David/Bud: Sure.
Jennifer/Mary Sue: How come I'm still in black and white?
David/Bud: What?
Jennifer/Mary Sue: I've had ten times as much sex as the rest of these girls, and I still look like this. I mean, they spend an hour in the back seat of some car and all the sudden they're in Technicolor?
David/Bud: I don't know. Maybe it's not just the sex.

David's Mom: When your father was here, I used to think, "This was it. This is the way it was always going to be. I had the right house. I had the right car. I had the right life."
David: There is no right house. There is no right car.
David's Mom: God, my face must look like a mess.
David: It looks great.
David's Mom: It's really sweet of you but I'm sure it does not look great.
David: Sure it does. Come here.
David's Mom: I'm 40 years old. I mean it's not supposed to be like this.
David: It's not supposed to be anything. Hold still.
David's Mom: How'd you get so smart all of a sudden?
David: I had a good day.

Jennifer/Mary Sue: I knew you'd pay a price for this. I knew you couldn't be so hopelessly geek-ridden for so long without suffering some really tragic consequences.

Big Bob: Everybody really likes you, George.
George: Oh. Well...
Big Bob: No! They do! And it's not just 'cause you're a good bowler. It's 'cause people respect you!

David/Bud: We're supposed to be in school.
Jennifer/Mary Sue: We're supposed to be at home, David. We're supposed to be in color!

Jennifer: I did the slut thing, David. It got kinda old.