Duckie: This is a really volcanic ensemble you're wearing, it's really marvelous!

Andie: You here long?
Duckie: No, no! Three, four, hours.

Iona: I mean, I'm old enough to be his mother, but when the Duck laid that kiss on me last night, I swear to God, my thighs just went up in flames! He must practice on melons or something.

Duckie: This is an incredibly romantic moment, and you're ruining it for me!

Blaine: You couldn't buy her, though, that's what's killing you, isn't it? Stef? That's it Stef! She thinks you're shit! And deep down, you know she's right!

Security guy: Loves a bitch Duck. Loves a bitch.

Duckie: You know what an older woman does for me?
Iona: Changes your diapers?