Mark: I was looking for some stamps.
Mr. Hunter: yeah I have some right here. Are you gonna send a letter to a friend back east?
Mark: No I was thinking about sending away for an inflatable date.

Mark: I'm dedicating this unusual song to an unusual person who makes me feel kind of... unusual.

Mark: They think you're moody, make 'em think you're crazy. Make 'em think you're about to snap. They say you got attitude, you show 'em some real attitude!

Mark: I mean, if I knew any thing about love, I would be out there making it, instead of sitting in here talking to you guys.

Mark: Remember my dear, I can smell a lie like a fart in a car.

Mark: Now I'm depressed. Now I feel like killing myself, but luckly I'm too depressed to bother.

Mark: Feeling screwed up at a screwed up time in a screwed up place does not necessarily make you screwed up.