Carter: Who died, Lee?
Lee: You!
Carter: Detective Yu?
Lee: Not Yu, you!
Carter: Who?
Lee: You!
Carter: Who?
Lee: Do you understand the words that are a-coming out of my mouth?
Carter: Don't nobody understand the words that are comin' out of your mouth.

Lee: This is my land. Here, I am Michael Jackson and you are Toto.
Carter: You mean Tito! Toto is what we ate for dinner last night!

Carter: *after accidentally punching Lee* Sorry, man!
Lee: Carter!
Carter: All y'all's look alike!

Carter: Couldn't help noticin' how she was staring at a brother.
Lee: She never even looked at you.
Carter: You just jealous, Lee, 'cause women like me. I'm tall, dark and hansome and you third world ugly.
Lee: I am not third world ugly, women think I'm cute. Like Snoopy.
Carter: Man, Snoopy is 6 inches taller than you.

Carter: I can't believe I flew 10,000 miles for this shit!

Carter: I saw that. You played it smooth too, walkin' away like that.
Lee: Yeah, I'm a player.

Carter: I asked them if they would like to get a drink with us.
Lee: You asked them if they would like to take off their clothes and sacrifice a goat.

Carter: Secret Service Agent James Carter, I like the sound of it. Won't be long before I'm in Washington D.C. protectin' the President.
Lee: We both know you wouldn't take a bullet for someone else.
Carter: Yeah but they don't know that.

Carter: Why didn't you tell me you had a bomb in your mouth?
Lee: I did.
Carter: No you did not!
Lee: I said "mmm!"
Carter: What the hell is "mmm!"
Lee: mmmboom!

Lee: Just try to blend in.
Carter: What do you mean, "blend in"? I'm two feet taller than everybody in here!

Carter: I'm from Los Angeles, we invented gangs.

Carter: Now why did you say it was a bomb.
Lee: You said it was a bomb!
Carter: I did not.
Lee: In the hotel, you said it was a bomb.
Carter: I said 'she was the bomb'.
Lee: She was the bomb?

Kenny: *pointing to Carter* Why are you hangin' with 7-11?
Lee: 7-11?
Kenny: Yeah, his mouth never closes.