Laney: I feel like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, except for that whole hooker thing.

Laney: What is this, some sort of dork outreach program?

Dean: Will you go to the Prom with me?
Laney: Yeah right.
Dean: So was that a no?
Laney: That was a hell no.

Dean: Room 409 is about to become a historical landmark.
Preston: What you getting murdered there later on?

Mac: Hi I'm Mac. I go to school with 500 chicks.

Girl in art class: Darkness rocks.

Taylor: As far as you're concerned you're vapor, you're spam, you're not even worth good yearbook space.

Taylor: You thought you became popular all by yourself? That is so cute.

Zack: What's Happenin Connie?
Friend: He called you Connie.
Melissa: So.
Friend: Your name's Melissa.

Dean: She's an istitution. Every girl wants to be her and every guy wants to nail her.
Preston: Basically you, with tits.

Dean: You're serious?
Zack: As a heartattack.

Zack: Hey Spaz.
Simon: He knows my name!

Mac: When was the last time you tweezed?
Laney: What?
Mac: I mean your eyebrows?
Laney: Never why?
Mac: Ever watch Sesame Street?
Laney: Yeah.
Mac: You know Bert.

Taylor: Jump up my ass Zack.
Zack: Been there, done that.

Brock: You didn't think I was gonna leave for AllStar road rules still dating you? Oh you did, that's sweet.

Laney: Screw the dolphins.
Jesse: Tried that last year. Banned from SeaWorld for life.

Laney: Am I a bet? AM I A BET?? AM I A FUCKING BET??!

Taylor: All of you who voted for me, you did the right thing. And for the rest of you. WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?

Purple Midget: My soul is an island, my car is a Ford.

Zack: Are you always like this?
Laney: No.
Jesse: Yes.

Other Purple midget: I want to be like Mike.

Mitch: Art is love people. Art is love.

Laney: Why'd you really come here Zack?
Zack: I forget.