Nick Mercer: Close your eyes. Close your eyes. Close... your... eyes. You're safe. You can relax. I'm not going to kiss you. He's gonna be so sorry he lost you, so stop worrying. Forget the past. Forget the pain. And remember what an incredible woman you are. You do that and he'll realize what he lost.
Kat Ellis: Holy crap. You're worth every penny.

Kat: Nothing that a bottle of Jack and a straight razor won't fix.

TJ: Oh my God! Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God! Top Kat! Ooooh! Where the bloody hell have you been? I have gynecologists that call more often.
Kat: You have more than one gynecologist?
TJ: You have to play them off. Otherwise they think your easy. *turns to Jeffery* Hello asshole. Listen, since you dumped my cousin brutally, and without cause, you wont mind if I just steal her away will you? Thanks.
Nick: I'd rather fight with you than make love with anyone else.

Kat: You know what pisses me off? I've been spilling my guts all weekend and I don't know a thing about you.
Nick: I'm allergic to fabric softener. I majored in comparative literature at Brown. I hate anchovies. And I think I'd miss you even if we never met.

Amy: Know what I like best about all of this?
Kat: That there's finally a reason for the whole world to revolve around you?

TJ: *to Kat and Amy* the only thing that you two have in common is that you're both secretly attracted to me.

Nick: Is that an old habit from ballet class or from a lifetime of walking on eggshells?
Kat: I never took ballet. *closes bathroom door*

Bunny: They were inseperable. If Kat ate a banana, Amy threw it up.
TJ: And if Amy threw it up, Kat ate it.

Nick: Here's to the husbands who've won you, the losers who've lost you, and the lucky bastards who've yet to meet you.