Heather Vandergeld: Look who just flew in from the slums of Beverly Hills.
Megan Vandergeld: It's the Beverly Ho-Billies.
Marcus Copeland as Tiffany Wilson: Squeeze me?
Kevin Copeland as Brittany Wilson: Oh no, you didn't?
Marcus: I'm sorry, but uhm... we just saw your new video. Yea, they had a screening over at Saks Fifth Avenue in the security office *laughs* A klept-ho-maniac!
Megan: *arrogantly* Your mother shops at Saks.
Marcus: What?
Kevin: Oh my God. You want to talk about mothers? You wanna talk about mothers! It's mother time, okay! Your mother's so dumb she went to Dr Dre for a Pap smear! "Something's wrong, Dr Dre! My coochie's doing a beatbox!"
Heather: Well yea? Your mother's so stupid she exercises when she could just get like, liposuction or something!
Marcus: Your mother's so old that her breast milk is powdered. You breast-feed like this: *blows powder from hand, and everyone starts to laugh*
Heather: Your mother is so, like... She's so... Megan you go!
Megan: Your mother is so stupid that she goes to Barney's Rooftop Deck Restaurant for lunch and orders a niçoise salad and calls it a 'ni-coise' salad. 'Ni-coise' salad, right?
Marcus: Your mother's ass is so hairy, it looks like Don King's about to pop out and say, "Only in America!"