Disclaimer: Saban owns the Power Rangers and the credits get complicated from here on. *grin* “Hold On To Me” is by John Michael Montgomery from his album Leave A Mark. The other songs, “Yet” and “Loving Arms”, I credited in their respective stories in After Space.
Author’s Note: Back! *grin* After Space Part #6 of 8 (and yes, it’s now 10 fics, but that’s it, no more *grin*). Thanks to Starhawk for yet another proof. *grin* Gonna try something weird this time. Wow, I say that as if it’s something unusual for me. *smirk* Okay, this is Zhane’s story but it will pick up where two of the previous stories left off, and will tell the further adventures of Andros & Ashley, and the girl.. *grin*
“crouched in a manic dream, numb to the soundless screams” --Rockapella
He knew that right there, by her side, was where he wanted to stay forever. He only had to tell her so. “Ashley,” he began, “I want to tell you something.”
****
Oh, they are *so* cute, Zhane smirked as he watched his best friend try to admit his love to Ashley. Andros stuttered and stammered, and Ashley patiently waited. Zhane was listening from the doorway of the observatory, occasionally peeking in. He couldn’t help it.
He hadn’t meant to be there. He had just been strolling along the corridors of the MegaShip, waiting until he knew Karone was alone so he could speak to her. There was so much Zhane wanted to tell her. So many things he had never had the chance to say before the war had separated them: him to work with the rebels, her back to the side of evil. He had not even been there for the short time she had been on the side of good, when she had been ‘Karone’. How could he tell her that he loved her, that he had always loved her? And who knew if she felt the same? He didn’t even know if he should burden her with such things considering what a traumatic time she had had lately, let alone that day in particular.
He had been waiting that night till either Andros stopped being overprotective or Karone tired of it and threw Andros out, whichever came first. So when he had walked past the observatory and had heard Andros and Ashley, he knew he had his chance. He hadn’t been able to walk away though. He just couldn’t resist the chance to eavesdrop. And so there he was, crouching outside the open door, watching, listening, and hoping Andros wouldn’t ‘overhear’ his thoughts.
So caught up was he in his thoughts of Karone, that he had at first failed to notice the lack of conversation coming from the observatory. He finally peeked in the room again, eyes widening in surprise at what he saw. Go Andros!, he thought, reminding himself not to actually project the thought *to* Andros. Zhane knew Ashley would surely kill him if Andros stopped what he was doing because of Zhane’s errant cheering.
I can almost feel your loving arms again
As her life slipped away, the girl screamed.
He had just turned back from peeking into the observatory when he heard it. Felt it too actually. Squatting as he was, the force of the scream hit him like a physical blow and he was knocked back on his heels, slamming into the wall. He had a brief vision, a jumble of images, the final one being of Astronema slumping to the floor of the Bridge of the Dark Fortress and darkness. Then as the vision ceased, so did the scream, leaving behind an eerie silence. He blinked quickly, his vision clearing as his eyes once again met the metal wall of the hallway.
He expected sirens to be blaring and the other Rangers to be running toward the Bridge because the hull was breached or they were under severe attack. It took him a moment to realize that nothing had happened to the MegaShip and that only he had felt or heard the strange blast of mental energy. It had to have been from Karone, he thought. He knew Andros’ mind presence too well. But why him and not her own brother? He shook his head, trying to clear it as he scrambled to his feet. One last peek into the observatory confirmed his suspicion that Andros had not heard or felt any of it.
He took off running toward Karone’s room, not sure why but knowing somehow that something was seriously wrong. And even though it had only been all of two seconds since the scream died away, he knew that each second was precious and he had to act fast. The thought briefly flickered in his mind to call Andros. But Zhane was already down several decks and he didn’t think he could clear his mind enough to send the call back to Andros.
His footfalls should have echoed as he raced through the empty hallways. But no sounds reached his searching ears or mind. He only wanted some small response, a continuance of the scream at least, so as to know that there was still a chance. It was as if the scream had erased all other sounds. He didn’t know when he’d ever heard the MegaShip this silent.
Yes he did, when he had awakened in the stasis pod. The silence had been deafening, save only for the frantic pounding of his heart as he had tried to figure out where he was and what had happened. His last memory had been only of blinding pain as he took the deathblow meant for Andros, then... nothing. The fear he had felt upon awakening from stasis that long ago afternoon paled in comparison to the sheer terror that he had felt projected at him just moments before in that soundless scream. He just hoped that whatever was wrong... that he wasn’t too late.
He slid to a stop outside her door, his feet slipping out from under him as he tried to halt his forward motion. His hands hit the floor, catching himself as he scrambled back to his feet. Normally he would have bowed to courtesy and knocked before entering, but these were far from normal circumstances. He slammed his hand against the touch pad and impatiently waited for the door to slide open. He ran into the room, stopping as his eyes adjusted to the minimal light.
“Karone?!” he shouted, and received no response. He quickly scanned what he could see of the small room in the dim starlight that shone through the window. There on the floor in the corner he saw a form lying very still. “Karone?!” he shouted again, and ran to her side. She was too still and too pale, lying there in a crumpled mass. She didn’t look to be breathing and he couldn’t find a pulse. “Karone!” he screamed her name again as if the redundancy of it would do some good. He took her in his arms... her body was already starting to feel cold to the touch.
He forced himself to calm down and clear his mind enough that he could send his thoughts to her. *Karone, answer me please!* but still there was no response. His psychic powers were not something he used often and he realized now that his lack of practice could cost him dearly. He reached out and ventured into her mind, deeper than he had ever tried with anyone before, except Andros. He went searching for her, hoping that he would find her still alive, that there was still life there. Where there should have been a flame he found only a dying ember. *Karone!* he called and saw the ember waver. *Karone, come back to us.* The ember grew brighter as her mind reached out to him for support. He continued on in a rush, as he saw his words were having some effect. *Andros needs you...* *I need you* he added, knowing it was true. The ember flickered again and grew as he felt her warm presence in his mind in response.
He was so happy he blew his concentration and was slammed back into his own body. He again blinked quickly bringing the real world back into focus, looking down at her hopefully. Time seemed to crawl as he waited and watched for some sign of life. He wondered if her presence in his mind had been only his imagination, and that he had not been able to reach her, that she really was gone. And with every second that passed, his fear only grew.
Suddenly her eyelids snapped open and she made a ragged gasp for air. Excited, he hugged her tightly, pulling her close. He realized belatedly that holding her as tightly as he was, he was not helping in her attempts to breathe. As he started to let go, he felt her arms go quickly around him, holding him just as fiercely.
*Stay* he heard her mind’s urgent whisper.
*Always* he said immediately.
She was trembling and he tried to calm her, telling her everything was fine now and gently kissing the top of her head. It felt so natural that he didn’t even think about it at first, then he realized what he was doing. He only wanted to make her feel better and it seemed to be helping. “Karone,” he ventured, “are you okay? What just happened?” Her trembling only increased, and at first she did not answer.
“I can’t,” she finally said. She dropped her head and pulled away. He let her go, but he noticed that she didn’t move far, just enough to put some space between the two. She looked at the floor and seemed to be trying to decide what to say.
Both Andros and Karone had refused to talk about what had happened aboard the Dark Fortress. The Rangers knew that Andros had destroyed Zordon’s tube, but they did not know much else. All they knew for sure was what they had seen. Andros had left in the dark of early morning for a final confrontation with his sister, and he had returned that afternoon carrying her lifeless body. Zhane flashedback a few minutes, to the brief mental images that had accompanied her scream: Astronema attacking and Andros defending, Astronema falling to the floor and lying dead still.
He thought he might never know what exactly happened on the Bridge of the Dark Fortress. He only knew that Astronema had died. And death was not something you got over quickly, to say the least. He felt sure that whatever had just happened to Karone had had something to do with her ‘death’ earlier that day. But if she refused to talk about it, he didn’t know how he could help. He could only make sure that she knew that he loved her and was there for her, including when or if she wanted to talk.
“You can tell me anything,” he said, hoping she would trust him and let him in. She looked at him, hesitantly raising her eyes to his. He looked deep into her eyes and the pain he saw there scared him. “Karone, let me help you. Can you tell me what happened?” She turned her head, once again avoiding his eyes. She looked down, saying something so low he couldn’t hear. “Karone?”
“Don’t call me that,” she repeated, still not looking at him.
“What?” He had no idea what she could possibly mean. Why would she not want to be called by her name?
She finally looked up at him and said simply, “Don’t call me that. I’m not Karone.”
Her statement sounded so strange he almost laughed till he saw how serious she really was. “What?” he finally managed to stutter out. “Of course you are. We played together as kids, Andros, you and me.”
“That was Karone. I’m not that little girl anymore,” she paused, then spoke again quickly, “I’m not even Astronema.” He noticed something that sounded like regret in her voice, almost as if she missed being the Queen of Evil, or at least missed having an identity that she was comfortable with. She continued, “I’m no one... no one at all.”
He cocked his head at her, but he thought he knew what she meant. She felt she had no identity. Karone was her identity as a little girl. But she had grown up as Astronema, who was truly the only person she knew how to be. And Astronema was dead. How could she go back to being Karone, someone who hadn’t existed for 13 years? For Karone, life was simple. It was telekinesis balls and jump rope. It was playing with her older brother and his best friend. It was depending on her parents for support and love. It was the sheltered life of an innocent child. She wasn’t Karone, and she couldn’t go back to that.
Zhane had felt similarly when he awoke from stasis. He had slept, healing his injuries. And while he was the same Zhane who had gone into stasis two years before, everyone else had gone on without him. The universe was different now and he was unsure of his place in it. He also knew that the differences between his and Karone’s situations were drastic. He had only two years to bridge. She had 13, and he did not have the other problems she had. She had other personalities with different ways of life that she had to try to mesh together to come up with one that defined who she was, one that she could live with.
He took his hand and gently turned her face toward him, though she still did not raise her eyes. “Of course you’re someone. You’re the woman I love.” He paused and then continued in an almost jovial way, “It’s not be the identity you’re searching for I know, but I hope it will do for a start.”
She looked at him incredulously, and scooted back further. “You don’t love me,” she said, disbelieving. “You loved Astronema. And I am not she.”
Zhane only smiled. “I love you, the little girl who used to kick my butt with the telekinesis ball, Astronema who, even with Wrath Staff and monsters, still giggled at roasted marshmallows, the girl outside the theatre who worked so hard to bump into me, and the beautiful woman sitting here now. You were in all of them; that’s who I saw, and that’s who I love.”
She stared at him, as if unable to comprehend that someone could love her through it all. “But I was evil. I was darkness itself and I tried to kill you so many times. How can you care?”
“How can I not? Where you saw only darkness, I saw light. I will always be here for you, and I will always love you.”
She turned away again, thinking over it all, trying to come to terms with what he had just admitted. He wanted to take her in his arms and comfort her, but he made himself sit patiently where he was. If she didn’t want him, he would be crushed. But that would not change how he felt about her or his vow to help her. He looked up at her and saw tears streaming down her face. “Kar--,” he stopped himself, knowing somehow that she truly did not wish to be called that. Then he felt her soft mind touch and heard her whispered words, *I love you too*.
He smiled, and this time he did move toward her, but she moved first meeting him halfway and pulling him close. He wrapped his arms around her and held her while she cried. What she couldn’t put into words, she showed him with her mind. All the pain and conflicts of her troubled existence as Astronema played out in his mind. He saw her capture and felt the pain of her brainwashing. He felt her struggles and witnessed her death. He sent her reassurances and soothing thoughts, banishing the pain as far from her as he could.
She sat curled up on his lap, arms still tightly around him. He still held her, rocking her slowly as her tears began to stop. He continued to talk to her, whispering tales of their childhood and all they would now have the chance to do together. She began to drift into, for first time in many years, an untroubled sleep. He noticed her drooping eyes, and knew how tired she was. He fell silent, and still holding her, he settled back into the same corner that she had earlier occupied. As silence filled the room once again, he too closed his eyes, confident that she would not leave again... that she would find the strength to stay with him. He needed her, as much as she needed him. The silence was broken by a solitary thought.
*Don’t leave me alone* he heard in his mind, and was startled by the pleading, yet determined tone.
*I never will* he answered and meant it.
THE END