Disclaimer: Saban owns the Power Rangers, still. “While You Sleep” is by Tracy Lawrence from his album, The Best Of Tracy Lawrence.
Author’s Note: I’m still here. :) This is After Space #7, and it’s finally PHANTOM’s turn. Heh hehe... I would like to thank Starhawk, not just for the proof. But also for being the excessively cool person she is, for being such a great friend, and for allowing me to borrow a character that she has invested so much time and thought into, making Saryn the awesome guy he is. Thanks. :)
TJ stopped at the Bridge door and turned back to look at Carlos. “No, I’m pretty sure I can handle this. Just leave it to me.”
A small ship slid with quiet ease into the hangar of the MegaShip. The ship seemed to have a natural invisibility, as did its pilot. The ship had become visible just off the port side of the MegaShip, and TJ had lowered the shields and opened the hangar doors. As the hangar doors closed, the ship’s hatch opened and the pilot disembarked. He started out assuming the invisible form he was more accustomed to, but when he saw TJ standing there he reconsidered and stayed visible.
“Hello Phantom,” TJ said, greeting him. “It’s good to see you. No one had heard from you since the war ended.”
“I have been… busy,” the Phantom Ranger responded. “News has spread slowly and details have been lacking. I knew only that the Rangers had succeeded, but not whether... everyone had survived.”
“ ‘Everyone’ is fine. She’s in her room right now.”
“Huh? Oh…,” Phantom picked up on TJ’s none-too-subtle hint.
“It’s on the habitation deck, room 5b.”
“Thank you,” Phantom said, making a move to head out of the hangar.
“And Phantom,” TJ started, stopping Phantom with his words.
“Yes?”
“Don’t hurt her again.” The threat was clearly made, and Phantom acknowledged it with an accepting silence. With a smile on his face and a warning look in his eye, TJ left the Phantom Ranger alone.
He watched as the Blue AstroRanger left the hangar. From anyone else in any other situation, Phantom would not have stood for such a threat. But it was deserved, so he kept silent. The Earth Rangers had always accepted him openly and treated him with kindness, and he had always turned away. Turning away was easier than seeing Cassie’s face and knowing he couldn’t stay. His absence of late had probably only made him seem more distant and unfeeling than before. So truthfully he had not expected a warm greeting from TJ. Phantom was well aware of Cassie and TJ’s close friendship, and he was glad for it. Every time his duty had pulled him away from her yet again, he found solace in the fact that TJ was there for her, since he could not be.
He shook his head and left the hangar, walking out into the deserted hallways of the MegaShip. He found himself shifting, becoming invisible again, and had to remind himself not to. He was among friends, or at least the closest people he could call to friends. He was safe here and he should trust them as they had trusted him many times before. That thought made him pause. Yes, they had trusted him. She had trusted him. And he had repaid her in broken promises and loneliness.
Though he had never been on the MegaShip before, his feet seemed to unerringly know where to take him. Into the lift, down several decks, and through the empty hallways, all the while he wondered where the other Rangers were. No one was about, but he assumed all was well or else TJ would have mentioned something in the hangar. He continued on, not paying attention to where he was going, but seemingly drawn inexplicably forward until he stopped, suddenly and remarkably at her room. Her Pink AstroRanger design, accompanied by musical notes, was emblazoned next to the door.
He hesitated outside her door for a moment, unsure of what to do. He had almost teleported straight into her room as he was so used to doing when entering closed rooms while invisible. But he was visible, and he stopped himself just short of teleporting, as he realized that he shouldn’t enter her room uninvited. He raised his hand to knock and was surprised to see it was shaking. He took a deep breath and brought his knuckles down upon the door. He received no answer. He knocked again, but was still met only with silence. Somehow, in some way he couldn’t explain, he knew she was inside. And the fact that she did not answer scared him. Terrifying thoughts raced through his mind as he became aware of just how frightened he was that she would reject him. He stared at her door, at a loss for what to do. He rationalized that there could have been other reasons for her silence, and willed himself to make a decision. Finally he hit the control pad and the door slid open.
“Cassie?” he called from the doorway, but did not enter. He did not wish to intrude if she really did not want to see him. But he had to know if she was all right. His visor enabled him to see into the darkness of her room. He saw her empty bed, sheets tangled and dumped on the floor. He entered then, concerned at the possible sign of trouble. That’s when he saw her. His view of the windowseat had been obscured from the doorway, but now he could see her, sleeping curled up in that incredibly small space.
He knew he should not disturb her, that he should let her sleep, that he should not be in her room, but he just could not take his eyes from her. After going for so long without seeing her beauty, now he could not get enough. There was so much he wanted to say to her, so many things he wanted to show her. He could not let another day go by without telling her how much he loved her. He had hesitated for far too long already. He had run out of reasons and excuses and he knew she was tired of hearing them. He would not blame her at all if she turned him away.
He should leave, he knew he should. He should come back when she was awake, and yet he did not. He stood there by her bed, as just being near her eased his troubled soul. Finally he moved quietly, intending to leave and let her rest, but knowing he truly did not want to. As he turned to go, he picked up the sheets and laid them back on her bed. That’s when he noticed the other objects strewn across the floor. There were broken pieces of plastic and metal with two reels of some black film. He thought he recognized it as an audio tape, something humans still used to replay prerecorded audio documents. The smashed pieces were scattered on the floor, along with a crumpled sheet of paper.
He looked at the paper curiously and picked it up. He turned it over, its thickness proving that it was a photo rather than just a sheet of paper. It was of Cassie and he, and it looked to be from that fateful day on Hercuron when they had last been together. How well he remembered that day. She had been supporting him and he had found her presence far too distracting. Her simple touch had almost made him forget the pain of his injuries, the search for Zordon, even telling the Rangers about the Delta MegaShip. He had had to force himself to think about the problems at hand and not the joy that filled him from just being at her side.
It was impossible that the photo existed, and yet it did, for he held it in his hand. Or rather he held what was left of it in his hand. The photo was wrinkled and torn, a large fold down the center was tearing them apart, the way he and his blind devotion to his duty had.
Somehow ‘duty’ did not seem like a reasonable excuse anymore. There was not a reason good enough for the pain he had caused her. He did not know how he had ever let himself become so controlled by his job that he had not been able to make time for her. How could he let her come so close to slipping away? If he lost her, none of it would matter anymore. Every day would be hollow, devoid of a reason for living. He raised his eyes from the photo and watched her sleeping there in the window. He almost started telling her everything right then, how much he loved her and how he could not live another day without her. But the room stayed silent as she slept.
There could be no more tomorrows or somedays. He would tell her, he had to tell her. He could not go on without her knowing that he loved her. She could slam the door in his face and refuse to even acknowledge him, but he had to tell her. His silence had cost them both, as they had suffered through the uncertainties of a warrior’s life without the comfort of knowing someone who loved them was out there waiting to see them again.
Weeks upon months of his own loneliness only made him feel all the more guilty for causing her to endure the same. His duty did not mean as much to him as she did. And yet he had left her, time and again, using his duty as an excuse. He had not been able to deal with his feelings and what just being near her did to him, when he knew he would only have to leave her again when his duty called. He would find a way to work it out this time. If he had to give it all up, he would, for her.
In the loneliness of his life, he had met few that had even tried to break down his defensive walls. Yet she had tried, and succeeded where the others had failed. And here he was, willing to risk everything for her. She had become a part of his life that he didn’t want to be without, ever.
He saw her shiver and pull her blanket closer around her. Even in his armor, he could feel the chill in the room. He laid the picture down and picked up another blanket from her bed and moved to the window. As he neared he saw her tear-streaked face, and felt sure that he was to blame for her tears. She could not be very comfortable on that small ledge, he reasoned. He wondered if he could manage to carry her to her bed without waking her.
His visor picked up on the heat radiating from her. She was burning up with fever even as she shook from the cold. Forget the bed, she was ill. He needed to take her to the medical bay. He lay the extra blanket on her, his gloved hand accidentally brushing her shoulder. She jumped at the sudden, unexpected touch, nearly falling off the ledge. He went to one knee immediately, stopping her fall, catching her as she still sat half in the windowseat.
Her sleepy mind thought nasty thoughts about falling out of bed twice in one night. Then she remembered that she had not gone back to her bed, and she slowly realized that although she did start to fall, she had never hit the floor. She slowly opened her blurry eyes and saw a figure in black kneeling before her, one hand on her back, the other under her legs, keeping her from falling as she still hung on the edge of the seat. Strangely the fact that someone was in her room did not startle her. She felt a certain calmness and inherent trust in this person.
She shifted her weight and sat up in the windowseat, putting her feet on the floor. He let her go, but did not move from where he was. He waited there to see what she would say, ready to leave if she so wished. It would kill him, but he would leave for her.
Just moving had made her so dizzy that she wanted to wretch, but she ignored it as best she could as she stared at the blurry image before her. She blinked and tried to make her eyes focus, but she knew who was there even without seeing him. “Phantom?” she asked, and reached out her hand to touch him.
He hated the doubt that he heard in her voice. But he knew that he had put it there with every time he had broken her trust. That would end now. He would tell her what his heart had wanted him to from the first moment he had seen her. Though it had been well over a year ago, it had seemed like a lifetime.
“I’m here.” He caught her hand in his, and raised his eyes to hers. He heard her gasp as he demorphed, the first time he had done so in another’s presence in years. “Cassie... I’m sorry. I should have been here all along.” He was finally telling her what he had always wanted to, “My name is Saryn.” He paused then as he realized how good it felt to finally tell her what he had kept hidden from the galaxy for so long. “I wish I had told you that long ago. There are many things I should have told you, and I will, but not now.” She looked oddly at him and he knew what she was thinking. Since when had he ever told her anything? And ‘later’ from him usually meant ‘never’. “No, I promise you I will answer all your questions. But you are sick. You should be in the medical bay. When you are well, I will tell you anything you want to know, if you will listen.”
She stared at him in silence. It seemed like an eternity to him as his heart pounded, beating entirely too fast and too loud it seemed to him. Then she smiled at him and nodded. Such simple movements and the weight of the universe lifted from him. She tried to stand to walk to the medical bay on her own, but her head was spinning and she stumbled, as her legs were too weak to hold her. He caught her up, wrapped in her blankets, and carried her out the door.
THE END