Dixie Flatline came into existence in 1958, when a war-surplus ENIAC computer attempted to divide by zero. Spent most of his childhood obsessed by reading science fiction and watching "Fireball XL-5" on TV. Went to college ostensibly to study computers, but spent most of his time developing severe obsessions with cancan girls, tetrahydrocannabinol, splatter movies, and the music of the Residents, and refused to give a whoop about computers in general. He changed his mind in the mid '80s, when force-fed large quantities of MS-DOS batch files, Lotus 1-2-3 formulae, and WordStar control-key commands. He now spends most of his work week making FoxPro and MS-Access sit up and beg, when not racing around the Matrix snarfing files and watching bemusedly as the lusers flame each other out.
Currently living in marital resignation in New Jersey, Dixie's major regrets are (a) not being a writer for MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000 and (b) not being a bass player for Stevie Nicks. He also swears that he has never heard of Robert Payes.
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