It's a sad day for a pathetic nobody like me. Mainly because ...

JONATHAN JACKSON IS GETTING MARRIED!!!!

*digresses* Anyway ... I'd like to take this opportunity to just say congratulations, and in no way am I planning to track him and Lisa Vultaggio down and get all Hand that Rocks the Cradle freaky, you know? I'm pretty happy for them now that a couple of hours have passed since I found out.

But ... I'd like to take you inside the head of a long-time fan ... the feelings I had when I first found out.

1. shock
First of all ... WTF? They were dating? I must have been under a rock on the bottom of the Pacific Ocean.

2. annoyance
WTF? I'm like, the same age as him, and I have soooo much trouble finding, and keeping a man. And getting married? Okay ... you go do that, Jonathan. *giggles*

3. sadness
Nooooo ... so something deep inside me still kinda wishes that JJ and I would meet and hook up and he'd be all, "Where have you been all my life?" like in a trashy romance novel. I mean, I had gotten over that, since now I gave my love for him a different name. More like, admiration and adoration. I truly enjoy him. Anyway, I didn't feel all psycho in love with him ever since ... he left the show, I guess, and when I heard he was getting married, something triggered that burried notion inside that me and him would actually end up together. It's sad... but it's sooooo true. It came outta nowhere, folks. I was as surprised as anyone would be.

4. sobbing like a damn baby
I didn't think it would happen, but I began to leak. I couldn't breathe. I was too shocked and too sad at the same time. I was like ... noooooooooooooooo! I called my sister, who was performing at a show at the time and left a message on her voicemail, which I think was 3 minutes long, on how upset I was he was marrying "Hannah." I was just a stupid, big dumb baby, crying to her older sister. It was not my best moment.

5. acceptance
And ... we come to now, at this momento. No, no, I'm okay guys. It's just the end of an era, so to speak. I'm calm now. I'm not crying (LOL). I'm just like ... I'm ... okay.

*sigh* I don't know what to say, really, but when I look at the way I acted in these past hours, I can't help but laugh. Just because I've sort of been transported back to when I was 13, when I first saw him. Geez.

It's sort of depressing for me to hear about, though. Not because him and Lisa are ending up together, believe me. I couldn't be happier that he has found true love and found someone that he can share his life with. I like when people find that kind of happiness. But, it's just depressing from the standpoint of a pathetic, lonely person such as myself. Sometimes, I feel that celebrities are all I have, and that's just, sad, sad, sad.

But, I digress. It's just the end of an era. I'll still love JJ and I'll probably still have that sick notion, burried way in the back of my head, that we will end up together. It'll just show up at unexpected times, such as it did yesterday.

I wish JJ and Lisa all the best, and I hope nobody starts badmouthing the couple because, "He belongs with me!" and so forth. And besides that ... I didn't know Jonathan liked older women *ahem ... JJ, I'm 5 days older ...tee hee* Alls I can say is ... you go boy.

For more info on the engagement, just head on over to Jackson Brothers, the official website.

Jonathan, if you're reading this ... I'm free for the wedding. Just tell me when and where. I'll bring the kareoke machine and the moonshine!!!