Not Again

The Angelic chords fill my ears as I walk through this paradise. The gentle breeze supports my every step. The grass is green, and the sky is blue up until the horizon where it has turned a beautiful shade of purple from the setting sun. I rest my body on a small hill and watch the day turn to night, when the stars decorate the sky one by one, dancing images of light.

I barely notice as the gentle drops of water land all around me. And the faint rumble in the distance does not reach my ears. The clouds begin to hurry across the sky, as if they were prey being chased by a hunter. And the wind begins to blow, harsh angry wind. My hair begins to whip back, hitting me in the face. How can this happen in my serene paradise.

I stand and face the oncoming storm. I can see the dark clouds huddling together, I see the lightning flash as it is born in the chaos above. I see the violent streaks run down and light my world ablaze. My paradise is pulled out from under my feet.

Who told you that you could return here? Why are you returning to torment me? I am just beginning to learn to live without you, I am trying to move on with my life. Why are you here? Why can't you just leave me alone?

You are hurting me again. You can't be here.

And I face the storm, and I feel myself lift off the ground, I twist and turn in the harsh winds, trying to find something to grasp onto, but there is nothing, you have devoured my world once again and I have nothing left.

I can not allow you to be here, you have to go, I have to push you away. You can not come into my heart again. You do not belong here.

Please, I don't want to fall in love with you again.

4/13/99
puppy.