Scene Two


We are in front of a backdrop representing the Chinese countryside with a railroad track extending as fas as the eyes can see. MOLLY and ANNIE MAY hurry on. MOLLY carries the briefcase. ANNIE MAY is panting, unable to catch her breath.
ANNIE MAY
Miz Molly, I is pooped.

MOLLY

You can't stop now, Annie May. We must find the mules which will take us to Chong Foo, the rickshaw driver.

ANNIE MAY

Whats I don' understand, Miz Molly, if we is supposed tuh gets tuh da Inn o' da Five Winds. how come we couldna jus' done gone in a straight line? How comes we gots tuh take da ship, den da seaplane, den da junk, den da train, now a mule, den a rickshaw…

MOLLY

You don't understand the French, Annie May. They don't respect anything unless it's complicated.

ANNIE MAY

An' anudder thing I donts understand is why we done et that map wid da instructions when all da time it seem everybody knows where we is goin' befo' we gets dere.

MOLLY

That's a good question.
(THEY hurry off just as CHANG and WANG, partially in their witches' outfits, come rushing on dragging CLARISSE, who is screaming.)
CLARISSE
Unhand me, you beasts! Someone! Help!
(As THEY tie her to the tracks, BARON races on carrying an empty briefcase which is open so that the audience can see. He, too, wears the remnants of his costume.)
CLARISSE
Conrad! Help me!

                                                                               (HE ignores her and dashes off.)

CLARISSE

Conrad!
(Now WAR LORD scurries on, also with an open and empty briefcase.)
CLARISSE
Save me!
(WAR LORD ignores her, hurries off. CHANG and WANG finish typing the last knot and follow their leader.)
Someone! Please!
(A COOLIE appears from stage left. HE sneaks up to Clarisse, stares at her, then motions offstage. Another COOLIE appears. FIRST COOLIE chatters in Chinese to the second. Then a THIRD enters. THEY point at Clarisse and chuckle.)
CLARISSE
Save me!
For the love of God, save me!
Won't somebody save me!
Won't you answer my cry!
(As she sings, A FEW MORE COOLIES appear, all fascinated and amused by her predicament.)
Help me!
For the love of God, help me!
Won't one of you help me?
I'm going to die!

I shall give you this lovely bonnet,
I shall give you this gorgeous dress;
Oh, pretty please, with sugar on it,
Get me out of this bloody mess!

Save me!
Won't somebody save me!
I'm under a jinx---
Won't you listen, you Chinks?
And save me,
Save me!
Save me!

(As the music continues, it alters from its accelerated pace to a soft-shoe number. FIRST COOLIE begins to dance to it, and gradually HE is followed by the OTHERS. THEY form a chorus line of soft-shoe addicts across the stage. CLARISSE is horrified as they continue their casual routine. When the number ends, THEY again chatter in Chinese, point to Clarisse and begin to wander off, giggling. JOHNNY enters from the right, followed by SAM. THEY both carry empty briefcases.)
CLARISSE
Save me!

                                                                                 (JOHNNY leans down and begins to untie her.)

CLARISSE

Oh, thank God! Everyone just ignores me! Those coolies over there---they just keep pointing at me and giggling and chattering away in Chinese---and tap-dancing!

                                                                               (FIRST COOLIE repeats a particular Chinese phrase.)

CLARISSE

What is it? What are they saying?

JOHNNY

They're saying, ma'am, there ain't been a train over these tracks in twenty years.
 
 



BLACKOUT
 
 


 
 

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