If Witches Were Horses, Part IV
By Jill Weber
Merry Christmas, Karen!

	"Okay, so what's this talisman and where is this maze that's so 
impossible to get into?" Jasmine demanded.
	"It's called the Stone of Conquest, and it can conquer anything, 
including a healing spell gone awry, Princess," the Genie of the Mirror 
answered slowly. "The Maze is in the Mountains of Despair . No man 
living knows where that is."
	Aladdin turned to Carpet. "Do YOU know where it is?"
	Carpet indicated that he did.
	The Mask made a face. "You really know how to get around these 
restrictions, don't you?" he asked Aladdin.
	Aladdin shrugged. "After getting around the 'princess must marry 
a prince' restriction, something like this is easy. After all, you did 
say 'no living man'. That not only leaves Carpet, it leaves half the 
human race!"
	The Mask blinked. "Half... oh, women of course."
	Genie waddled over wearing dark bushy eyebrows and a fake nose 
and moustache attached to plastic glasses. "Not to mention, boys, 
girls, genies, certain mouthy parrots and a large selection of maps 
from Rand McNally." He wiggled his eyebrows and blew smoke from a large 
'cigar.'
	"How are we going to convince Mekhanikles to help us?" Sadira 
asked, pacing restlessly. She had to admit, a horse's body was nice for 
walking around in. She didn't think she could do much acrobatics in it, 
though. Even without the possibility of dying, she'd rather have her 
own body back.
	"We have to convince Mekhanikles that he needs the stone," Jamine 
said. "But how?"
	"Let's figure that out after we've paid Mekhanikls a visit." 
Aladdin said, cracking his knuckles. "I owe that pencil necked Greek a 
few lumps, anyway.
	"Whoa! Easy, Al," Genie warned. He puffed into a little old lady 
outfit. "Don't forget our 'G' rating!" He turned to the Genie of the 
Mirror. "Are you coming or are you staying here, by yourself, in the 
dark?" he asked. Obviously, he was still more than a little upset with 
his compatriot.
	"I can't exactly travel like this," the Mask replied.
	Genie smiled wickedly. "Oh, I can take care of that!" Now it was 
his turn to crack his knuckles.
	Aladdin cleared his throat to smother a chuckle. "Remember that 
'G' rating, Genie!" he said, patting Genie on the back.  He had no idea 
what a 'G' rating was, or why they needed to preserve it. But he'd long 
since started picking up Genie's teminology.
	"Oh, don't worry, Al," Genie said with a big, if ominous, grin. 
"This won't do a THING that Standards and Practices disapproves of." He 
waved his hands,there was a puff of blue smoke and a yelp from the 
Genie of the Mirror. Genie admired his handywork for a moment, then 
said cheerfully: "Shall we go visit Mekhanikles?"
	"Swell," said the Genie of the Mirror in a very small voice.

	Visiting Mekhanikles proved to be easier said than done. They 
started by returning to "the scene of the crime", as Genie put it. The 
place where Mekhanikles giant crab had blown up and broken Aladdin's 
leg. Tracking Mekhanikles from there was impossible, he'd flown away on 
one of his creations. Back tracking him hadn't proved to be any more 
successful, all they found was an empty cave.
	"We don't even know for sure that Mekhanikle was HERE!" hollered 
Iago.
	Jasmine knelt and ran her fingers along the floor. She looked at 
her clean hands and said dryly. "He was here. This place is spotless."
	Genie materialized into a fussy butler wearing white kid gloves. 
He repeated Jasmine's experiment closer to the roof. "It appears that 
Her Royal Highness is correct," he announced snootily. "However, from 
the layer of dust that has accumulated on the upper shelves, it would 
appear that Mekhanikles has not been here since the exploding crab 
incident."
	He poofed back into himself and asked Aladdin: "I forget, do we 
have a plan B?"
	Aladdin made a rueful face. "He has to be nearby. He couldn't 
have traveled too far after yesterday's food fight."
	"Yeah, yeah, yeah," muttered Iago. "But where IS he!"
	"We need more help to find him," Sadira said. "Who can we get?"
	"Oh, we can call on the ever so lovely and talented Eden, Genie 
of the Bottle!" Genie said, transforming himself into a seal of 
approval and clapping enthusiastically. "She can help! She has 
phenominal cosmic powers! ANNNDDD... she LIKESSSSSSS me!"
	He transformed back into his usual self and whipped his lamp out 
and reached inside. "I have just the thing here," he said, his "tail" 
whipped back and forth like an overeager puppy's. 
	"Any excuse to talk to his girlfriend," Iago muttered. "Can't we 
EVER get away from this mush?"
	Sadira agreed, but didn't say so. "All this mush" was making her 
uncomfortably aware that it was her crush on Aladdin that had put them 
in this predicament, although she couldn't have known that the magic 
mirror would have reacted that way. Reminded of the mirror, she pulled 
her new hand mirror out from her sleeve.
	"Mask? Do you see him?" she asked, the miniaturized mirror.
	A tiny version of the Mask appeared and shook his head slightly. 
"I am sorry, my Mistress, but I cannot locate the one that you seek."
	"Are you okay in there?" Sadira asked.
	The Mask sighed. "Just when I think things can't get any 
worse..." he shook his head again. "Never mind, I'm fine. It's not like 
I can move around in here, anyway. And at least I can get out of the 
Witches' Sanctuary!"
	Iago flapped over and landed on Sadira's shoulder. "Geez, why are 
you so worried about that schmuck?" he demanded. "Just give him orders. 
You know: "Mirror, mirror, in my hand, who's the biggest jerk in the 
land?"
	"That would be YOU," the Mask intoned. Then it faded away. Sadira 
presumed it was doing whatever it did to look for signs of Mekhanikles. 
	Just then, Genie pulled something out of his lamp. "See, a 
princess phone!" he told Jasmine. "Just the thing to chat with your 
friends in faraway places!"
	He spun a dial on the princess phone and listened hopefully. His 
face fell (and had to be chased around the room) when he heard Eden's 
voice: "Hi! Dondi and I aren't in right now, we've gone off on a three 
hour tour. See you in reruns, big guy!" (Of course she knew who was 
calling. Only Genie had this number!)
	Abu caught Genie's face and handed it to Genie, who slapped it 
on. "Well, that will take a few years," Genie muttered. His face 
started to fall again, and Genie pushed it back in place.
	They forbore to ask how a three hour tour could take years. 
	"Well, that's just great!" howelled Iago. "Why can't you get a 
more reliable girlfriend..." 
	Genie's coloring darkened and so did his expression.
	"I didn't mean unreliable, I meant..." Iago blithered, realizing 
he'd put his foot into it. "Uhhh... stay at home, yeah, that's it. My 
girl Thundra is easy to find, she... Hey, that's it! Thundra's the 
rainbird! She's got all the clouds in the world at her disposal, if 
anyone can find Mekhanikles, she can!"
	Sadira made a face. But we're in the desert! There are no clouds 
here!"
	"But it's worth a shot," Aladdin said. "Iago, can you get in 
touch...." he staggered a little and Genie instantly forgot his ire at 
Iago. 
	"Easy, Al, buddy!" he said, putting a steadying arm around the 
centaur. "Let us take care of this!"
	"I guess we can take Carpet to the Rain Forest," Jasmine said to 
Iago.
	"Nah, we don't need to go traveling, Jaz! We can bring her here!"
	"How?" Jasmine asked. "I don't think she has a 'phone', princess 
or otherwise."
	Genie whipped out a small box and pointed it at a larger box. 
"Interactive T.V.! It'll be all the rage! You point the remote control 
at the television screen and push!" 
	He pushed a button on the smaller box and the 'television screen' 
lit up. There was a picture of six personages under huge hair driers 
(they knew they were hair driers because they were labeled as such). 
Five of the personages appeared to be golden skinned women, only larger 
and more beautiful than any mortal women could be. The sixth was a 
large green bird whose wings and tail rivaled the rainbow in variety of 
colors.
	It was the Rain Bird who spoke first. "Iago?" she cried in tinny 
tones. "My little giblet! How good to see you again!" She sprang out of 
the television and scooped Iago up into her mulitcolored wings. She 
planted several kisses on the embarrassed parrot.
	"Not in front of the guys!" he said, trying not very hard to get 
free. "Oh, Thundra, this is Sadira, a witch of the sand in training, 
sort of."
	Thundra looked at Sadira in surprise. "I thought all witches were 
old and ugly!"
	Sadira made a rueful face. "Me, too, until I became one." They 
were intrupted by a blast of static from the television set.
	They turned to see the golden skinned women frowning at their 
audience. "Hey! We're doing a commercial here!" Terpsichore complained.
	"What are we going to do for a leading lady now that you've 
nabbed our bird?" Thalia chimed in.
	A voice from off screen broke in. "Ladies! Need I remind you that 
you are in the WRONG show?"
	Thalia whipped out a scroll from behind her back. "Bobby, baby, 
didn't you see this memo? According to our new contracts, Jill is 
obligated to give us an appearance in all her Disney stories or we 
inspire Mr. Stephen King to write her into one of HIS stories... and 
people have a tendency to NOT come out of Stevie Baby's stories."
	"But we need a lead singer for the commercial!" sighed Calliope.
	"Oh," Bob the Narrator said. "Well, how about Megara? She's got 
the voice, the presence and the big hair needed for this scene!"
	"Perfect!" the Muses chorused.
	Calliope reached out and grabbed Genie's remote control. "Excuse 
me, darling, we'll need this." She pushed the button and the screen 
went dark. Then the television disappeared.
	"Well, so much for my career in show business!" Thundra sighed. 
"Oh, well, maybe Zeus can arrange a second gig for me." She turned her 
attention to Iago. "What's wrong, my little giblet?" she asked.
	Iago managed to get his mind back on business with an effort. 
"Thundra, remember that wacky Greek who tried to destroy your rain 
forest?"
	"Mekhanikles?" Thundra said. "I'm not likely to forget THAT 
hombre loco! Why?"
	"We need to find him," Iago said. "Aladdin and Sadira's life 
depend on it."
	"Then the Griego loco is as found!" She summoned her clouds and 
sent them off to search the four corners of the Earth.

	Unfortunately, searching the Earth takes a while. They returned 
to Agrabah to see if they could find anything in any of Jafar's books 
that would help. All they found was further confirmation that Aladdin 
and Sadira's condition was probably fatal. 
	Aladdin didn't sleep well that night. At dawn, he took a stroll 
though the menagerie where he was sleeping, only to find Sadira had 
also been unable to sleep.
	"Oh, ah, hi!" Aladdin said awkwardly.
	Sadira smiled sadly. "That's okay, Aladdin, you don't have to 
pretend to like me." she said.
	"I'm not pretending," Aladdin protested, spreading his hands in a 
placating manner. "I really do like you, it's just that... well, I'm 
not sure how to act around you."
	Sadira cocked her head. "What do you mean?"
	Aladdin began to pace back and forth in front of the peacock 
fountain. "Well, it's just that I'm still not used to people liking me 
AT ALL, much less... well, you know."
	Sadira rolled her tongue around in her cheek as she thought that 
over. "Yeah, I guess I do know. I've been alone all my life, I'm not 
used to having friends either. I guess that's why I fell for you. You 
were the first person who was NICE to me."
	Aladdin blushed. "I'm sorry," he said. "I didn't mean to lead you 
on." 
	Sadira shook her head. "No, you told me that you had a 
girlfriend, I'm the one who got out of line."
	"Well, I've been out of line, too," Aladdin said, continuing to 
pace. "Part of it's just, well, I've never been in love before and I'm 
not sure how I'm supposed to relate to girls other than Jasmine. She 
already gets enough grief because she's engaged to a street rat, I 
don't want her to have to put up with rumors that she's fallen for a 
two-timing street rat."
	Sadira blinked. "Oh, I hadn't thought of that!" She started 
pacing along with Aladdin.
	"Plus, I don't know what to say to make you feel better," Aladdin 
confessed. "If you had fallen for someone like the Sultan, I could say: 
"Poor Sadira, you didn't get the man of your dreams!" 
	He stopped pacing and faced her. "What do I say here? Poor 
Sadira, you didn't get... ME!" he did a credible imitation of one of 
Jasmine's snootier suitors and Sadira was forced to giggle as Aladdin 
swaggered a bit around the fountain.
	"I see your point, cousin," she said, imitating the Genie of the 
Mirror.
	Aladdin grinned. "And if you'd fallen for someone like, say, 
Rasoul..."
	"Not in this lifetime," muttered Sadira.
	"I could say, 'Oh, forget that creep! He's not good enough for 
you!"
	Sadira saw where this was leading. She put a hand over her mouth 
to stifle a giggle. "Oh, no, I can definitely see your problem with 
that one!"
	Aladdin shook out his mane. "Yeah, I can't say that I'm a creep! 
I'd get too many people AGREEING!"
	Sadira sobered up a little. "I'd never agree," she said. She 
stopped pacing and sighed. "Still, I wonder what might have happened if 
you had met me before you met Jasmine. Do you think...?"
	Aladdin sighed. "I don't know. I like you a lot, and it's kind of 
flattering that you, well, pursued me, but we both know the first rule 
of Street Rat conduct... 'When pursued... '"
	"Run," Sadira said dryly. "I take it Jasmine has a different 
approach?"
	"Well, Jasmine tends to let me do the chasing," Aladdin said. 
"She's likely to do something along the lines..."
	He was interrupted by the princess under discussion. "Oh, 
Aladdin! Over here!"
	Sadira and Aladdin lost it. Jasmine eyed laughing centaurs 
suspiciously as she and Carpet floated over to them. "What did I say?"
	"It wasn't what, Princess," Aladdin replied.
	"It was when," Sadira finished.
	They started laughing again.
	Jasmine shook her head and smiled. "Whatever," she said. "I'm 
glad you two are getting along. We just got word from Thundra, she's 
found Mekhanikles. Now all we have to do is figure out how to get him 
to do our dirty work for us."

	They gathered around the breakfast table that the servants had 
set up in the menagerie. Over eggs and mangos, they tried to come up 
with some plot that would make Mekhanikles want the Stone of Conquest.
	"Wouldn't just knowing that the stone exists make him want it?" 
Sadira asked.
	"Maybe," Jasmine said. "But I'm not sure we want him to know 
exactly what it is. After all, once he gets it, what's to prevent him 
from using it to conquer Agrabah?"
	"We need to convince him that it will solve one particular 
problem he has." Aladdin said. "What do we know about him that would 
give us a hint about a problem he can't solve on his own?"
	Genie floated past chin resting on his hand. "Well, he's the 
Greek geek neat freak whose machines can't be beak..." he caught Iago's 
caustic glare and defended himself. "Well, beat doesn't rhyme 
perfectly."
	"But he can be beat," Aladdin said. "I do it all the time." This 
time Iago's glare was directed at Aladdin, who amended. "Okay, WE beat 
him all the time, but it's ME he wants to kill!"
	Jasmine rubbed her chin. "Actually, he thinks he already killed 
you," she said. "He thought I was attacking him to avenge your death."
	Aladdin's eyes narrowed. "Really?" He exchanged glances with 
Genie. "So, if he thinks I'm dead..."
	Genie grinned.  "I know JUST the thing!" He waved his hand and 
Aladdin's head was covered with a very peculiar helmet.
	"What is this for?" Aladdin said. 
	"It's to help you get around, Al," Genie said. "Try walking."
	Aladdin wheeled around and walked a few paces.
	"Let me elucidate, you stay still, just THINK about walking 
around and let the virtual reality helmet take it from there!
	Aladdin stood still, and then he was standing beside himself. 
Only the second self was human, dressed in his old ragged outfit and he 
was blue, skin, rags and all.
	"Oh, how nice, you and Genie are twinsies!" Iago said 
sarcastically.
	Abu hit him with a mango.
	"Not now, guys," Jasmine said, preventing Iago from retaliating. 
She walked over to the blue Aladdin. She reached out to touch it, and 
Aladdin mimed kissing her hand.
	Jasmine sighed.
	"Sorry, Jas, there are limits to what you can do with virtual 
reality," Genie said.
	"Like you'd know anything about ANY kind of reality," muttered 
Iago. Then he squawked as a blue bird cage materialized around him. 
	"I know that nasty little birdies should be in cages," the blue 
cage smirked.
	"Hey!" objected Thundra. Genie puffed back into his normal form, 
gave Thundra a contrite smile and a boquet of birds of paradise, then 
puffed into tailor's clothing. "Now this outfit, she speaks of terror, 
non? I think we will scare the dickens out of Mister Scrooge, er 
Mekhanikles."
	"Are you kidding!" Iago shrilled. "This wimpy ghost wouldn't 
scare my Aunt Petunia!" He flapped through the Virtual Aladdin and 
landed on Centaur Aladdin's shoulder. "It's too... too..."
	"Blue?" suggested Sadira.
	"Cute?" suggest Jasmine, much to Aladdin's disgust. ("I am not 
cute!" he muttered.)
	"Punctual?"suggested Genie.
	They all looked at him quizzically. He shrugged.
	"NEAT!" howled Iago. "It's too clean and neat. Mekhanikles won't 
ever be scared of a CLEAN ghost! Where's the mouldering grave dirt! The 
decaying flesh! The..."
	Genie pinched his beak shut. "We get the idea. Unfortunately, 
there's no way for me to create dirt that will drip off of Virtual Al. 
We'll just have to go with what we've got!"
	"OK, so maybe we can convince Mekhanikles that this is my ghost," 
Aladdin said. "But how do we get him to the Maze where the Conquest 
Stone is?"
	"We'll need a shill," Genie said. "Somebody he trusts that can 
tip him off about the benefits of the stone in the Maze. Once he learns 
that the Maze can't be entered by anything living or magical, he'll 
think of his little toys."
	"What makes you so sure of that?" Iago demanded.
	Aladdin shrugged. "I thought of it because we'd just seen 
Mekhanikles. He eats, sleeps, breaths machines. Even if there wasn't 
that restriction, Mekhanikles would probably send his toys in.. They're 
his first answer to everything." He sighed and his Virtual Self 
straightened up. "So, when am I on?"
	"Midnight," Genie said, materializing a grandfather clock on the 
palm of his hand. "It's traditional." The clock struck midnight, then 
changed into a pumpkin.

	That midnight, Mekhanikles was awakened by a low groan. He sighed 
and sat up. "What a time to need an oil change," he muttered.
	"It's not time to change the oil," moaned the voice.
	"Oh, good," Mekhanikles turned over to go back to sleep. Then he 
sat bolt upright. "Who said that!"
	"Me," said Virtual Aladdin, perching on the end of Mekhanikles 
couch.
	Mekhanikles glared at him. "I thought you were dead, you poofy 
haired miscreant!"
	Aladdin glared back. "I am, and you know, I don't like it!" After 
a pause to allow Mekhanikles to absorb that, Virtual Aladdin added. 
"And who are you calling a miscreant, anyway?"
	Mekhanikles sneered. "Do you expect me to believe such a 
transparent story as that!" He yanked a lever near his bed and a net 
shot out of the wall over Mekhanikles' head... and went right through 
Aladdin.
	"It's taken me a few days to accept it myself," Aladdin said 
dryly. He moved a few feet away from Mekhanikles' sleeping couch and 
perched on nothing. "I don't know which is worse, being dead or being 
bound to you."
	"Bah, such trickery won't... what do you mean, bound to me?" 
Mekhanikles' optic whirrled out to take a closer look at Aladdin.
	"You murdered me," Aladdin said, shrugging. "Now I'm bound to 
haunt you until the day I SHOULD have died had I lived out my natural 
life span."
	Mekhanikles eyed him narrowly. "You expect me to believe that?" 
he asked.
	Aladdin shrugged. "I don't care what you believe. But we'll have 
a lot of time together." He smiled wickedly. "Unless you have an 
'unfortunate accident' of your own, that is."
	Mekhanikles lit a lamp and studied Virtual Aladdin. He got out of 
bed to circle the apparition with some curiosity. "Hm, no shadow," he 
observed. He waved his hand at Aladdin. "And no physicl reality. Bah, 
what's there for me to be afraid of?" 
	To himself, he said: "Floats, is unsubstantial, and is blue. Now 
where's that genie trap?" He casually opened his carefully alphabetized 
cupboard and pulled out a genie trap. "No, you aren't fooling me, 
Genie!" he cried with delight. The trap opened and applied suction that 
was designed to ensnare and imprison Genies.
	It had no effect on Virtual Aladdin.
	Mekhanikles blinked. "So, you're not genie, or any other magical 
entity."
	"No, I told you that, didn't I?"
	Mekhanikles sighed. "Well, if you're dead, then run along and 
decay, I'm a busy genius."
	"I told you, I'm bound to you for the rest of my natural life 
span."
	Mekhanikls shrugged. "Oh, well, street rats don't live very long 
anyway." And he went back to bed and blew out the lights.
	With the help of Genie, Virtual Aladdin spend the night making 
the customary sound effects of a haunting -- groans and wails, 
clattering and clanking, shrieks and the sound of smashing glass. 
Thundra helped out by sending some extremely noisy thunderclouds to 
help with the atmosphere.
	After about an hour, Mekhanikles put in earplugs and went back to 
sleep. Disappointed, the haunters drifted back to Agrabah.

	"I told you it wouldn't scare Mekhanikles!" Iago bellowed. "He's 
not likely to be scared by anything that neat! You need mess, not 
noise!"
	"Iago's right," Jasmine said.
	"Can I get that in writing?" Iago asked. He handed Jasmine a 
quill and a piece of parchment.
	Jasmine scrawled. "Nice try, but Sadira and I have already 
thought of that." on the scroll and signed with a flourish. Iago 
frowned, then started plotting how he could transfer the signature to a 
bank draft.
	"So, we're going to have to add mess to the noise," Jasmine said. 
"Sadira and I have collected just the mess we need." She waved her hand 
to where several burlap bags sat next to a cauldron of stew. It was 
impossible to say which smelled worse.
	"I whipped up some more stew," Sadira said.
	Iago opened his mouth.
	"Say anything, and I'll feed it to you," Sadira continued.
	Iago closed his mouth.
	"And I picked up a few contributions from Rajah," Jasmine said, 
gesturing to the burlap bags.
	Aladdin shook his head. "You two are so clever, but how do we 
deliver it?"
	Everyone looked at Iago. "Oh, no, I'm not touching that stuff!" 
He looked around frantically and spotted Abu. "Besides, you need me and 
the monkey to handle another assignment."
	"Which is?" Aladdin asked.
	"Destroying stuff," Iago said. "You know, always do what you do 
best."

	The next night, Mekhanikles slept with his earplugs in. He didn't 
hear the intruders, but he saw the results the next day. Sadira had 
delivered the stew and the tiger contributions via a sand storm. Abu 
and Iago had gone through his hideount like a hurricane, opening 
cupboards and throwing things around with joyous abandon. Genie and 
Thundra had spent the night huddled over a special project of their 
own.
	"What is that smell?" demanded Mekhanikles as he picked his way 
through the debris.
	"You told me to start decaying," Virtual Aladdin informed him.
	"This is NOT the smell of a decaying cadaver!" snarled 
Mekhanikles as he tried to straighten out his work room.
	Virtual Aladdin shrugged. "Well, it's the best I could do on 
short notice. I haven't actually started to decay yet. The desert 
climate preserves bodies, you know."
	Mekhanikles shot him a dirty look. "You will pay for this!" he 
vowed.
	"I'm DEAD, what can you do to me now?!" bellowed Aladdin.
	"Bah," Mekhanikles said. He still didn't believe it was Aladdin's 
ghost. It had to be a Genie trick of some sort. He was going to have to 
set up more genie traps. He spotted an unbroken bottle and picked it 
up, thinking it might be useful. He opened it and the miniature 
electrical storm that Genie and Thundra had stored in there gave him a 
big enough shock to frizz out his hair.
	"Oh, I WILL get you for this, Genie," muttered Mekhanikles. The 
'ghost' didn't seem to hang around during the day, so he spent his time 
cleaning up and setting traps. He was vindicated the next day, when he 
awoke and found Genie nestled snugly in one of the traps.
	"Sweets for the sweet and booby traps for the boobies!" 
Mekhanikles crowed. "Let's see your "ghost" show up NOW!"
	"Genie!" cried Virtual Aladdin.
	Mekhanikles' jaw dropped. He knew it was impossible for Genie to 
work magic while he was imprisoned.
	Virtual Aladdin ignored Mekhanikles and floated over to the genie 
trap. "What are you doing here?" he asked.
	"I... I missed you, Aladdin. I knew you'd have to haunt 
Mekhanikles, so I came to see you." The thought of losing Aladdin 
caused a sorrow that was too real for Mekhanikles to disbelieve. 
	"He really IS a ghost," Mekhanikles gasped.
	"Yeah," sighed the prisoner. "You won, happy now?"
	"No!" Mekhanikles said. "I want him out of here! Now! Do you know 
how?"
	"Well, you can wait until the appointed day of my death." Virtual 
Aladdin said.
	"Unacceptable," Mekhanikles sniffed.
	"You could die yourself," Aladdin added, with a wicked grin.
	"Definitely out."
	The prisoner snorted. "There's only one other way to send him to 
his eternal rest, and YOU certainly can't get to it!"
	"Try me," Mekhanikles said, crossing his arms and glaring.
	"It's a magical talisman that's in a maze that nothing living and 
nothing magical can enter!" the Genie in the bottle said.
	Mekhanikles' suspicions came back. "My machines can get there!" 
Was this some sort of trick? He wondered. It was just too pat.
	"Your machines are magical," the Genie sniffed.
	"They're cience!"
	"Magic!"
	"Science!"
	"Prove it!" the Genie challenged.
	"Tell me where this thing is, and I will!" Mekhanikles snapped 
back.
	"Why should I?" the Genie sulked.
	"Please, Genie?" Virtual Aladdins said. "I don't want to be stuck 
with Mekhanikles any more than he wants to be stuck with me!" He gave 
Mekhanikles a sour look. "Besides, maybe he'll be killed."
	"Oh, very well," the Genie said. "Let me out and I'll show you."
	"I'm not letting you out!" Mekhanikles said. "You just give me 
directions and I'll take it from there!"
	Virtual Aladdin gave the Genie a pleading look. "Have it your 
way," the Genie sighed.
	Virtual Aladdin faded as Centaur Aladdin removed his helmet. 
"Okay, now what?" he asked Genie. Then he did a double take. "Hey, if 
YOU'RE here, who's in that trap?" He looked around wildly, then grabbed 
Genie by his front. "WHERE'S JASMINE?!?!"
	"Ah, sorry, Al," Genie muttered. "But I'm needed out here to do 
the transportation and..."
	"Jasmine insisted!" Sadira broke in.
	Aladdin grasped the bridge of his nose between his thumb and 
forefinger. "Now I know how the Sultan feels. Okay, people, let's get 
into position. I want to get back into Mekhanikle's giant bug of the 
day as soon as I can."

	Carpet had shown them to the Maze of Despair  and Jasmine had 
drawn a map designed to bring Mekhanikles to the Maze's entrance 
shortly after Aladdin and the others arrived. 
	When Mekhanikles arrived in the grassy valley where the maze had 
been built, he found a black globe the size of the Sultan's palace 
floating five feet above the ground. Two stairways curved their way to 
the globe. There were signs to indicate that people had gone up the 
stairs. There were no signs to show if anybody had ever come back 
down... alive. There were plenty of signs of death. The area beneath 
the globe was devoid of grass, which made it all too easy to see the 
bones scattered in the dark earth.
	"Well, so far you're information has proven true," Mekhanikles 
admitted to 'Genie'. "So, now what?"
	Jasmine-Genie snorted. "YOU'RE supposed to be the genius," she 
said. "You figure it out."
	"I suppose I'll have to send in some of my babies," Mekhanikles 
mused. He went outside, carrying the genie trap with him. As he looked 
the black globe over, a herd of burnoose clad centaurs wandered over.
Mekhanikles tensed, but the centaurs made no hostile moves. "Apple?" a 
brown mare asked him, holding out an apple.
	"Thank you," Mekhanikles said. He took a bite out of the apple, 
then gestured toward the globe. "What can you tell me about the globe?" 
he asked.
	"It's dangerous," Sadira warned.
	"I know that," Mekhanikles said sourly. "I don't intend to go in 
there." He looked up the stairs. "Do you know if the stairs are 
dangerous, too?"
	"No idea," admitted Sadira. "I have no intention of finding out, 
either."
	"I do," Mekhanikles said loftily. "But I plan to do it the 
intelligent way." He pulled two mechanical beetles out of his pocket 
and wound them up. The beetle that went up the south stair way made it 
to the top safely. The beetle that started up the north stairway only 
got half way up. Mechanical bug parts floated down to mingle with the 
skeletons on the ground.
	Sadira cocked her head. "Interesting. But can you control your 
minions once they're inside?" she asked.
	"Of course!" huffed Mekhanikles. Normally he would have done 
something to chase the centaurs off. But they reminded him of home, so 
he let them stay. 
	He pulled a box with bug like antenna on it out of his tunic and 
began twirling knobs. The surviving beetle entered the globe, where it 
swiftly ceased being a surviving beetle.
	Mekhanikles sighed as more bug parts rained down. "This could 
take forever," he muttered. He sent another beetle in.
	"How will that help?" Sadira asked.
	 "I'm instructing this one to avoid the remains of his 
predessor," Mekhanikles informed her loftily. There was another shower 
of bug parts.
	"If the bug parts keep falling out, then how can there be any 
remains to see?" Sadira asked, munching on an apple.
	"Everybody's a critic," muttered Mekhanikles.
	Sadira wondered if she could use her sand powers in some way. 
Maybe if she dropped sand from above, it would sift through and leave a 
map of the maze on the ground? Unfortunately, using her powers might 
make Mekhanikles suspicious. Wait, why not suggest the sifting powder 
to Mekhanikles and let HIM figure it out?
	"Can you drop some sort of powder from above the globe?" she 
asked. "Then it might sift down and make a pattern on the ground."
	Mekhanikles interuppted her excitedly. "Which would show a map of 
the maze!" His face fell. "But I don't have any suitable powder."
	"How about paint?" Jasmine-genie suggested.
	Mekhanikles brightened. "Of course!" He scowled at the ground 
under the globe. "But that ground is too uneven. Paint won't work."
	"If you let me out..." Jasmine-genie offered.
	"No," Mekhanikles snarled. "Besides, I'd rather do this myself." 
	After an hour or so of hard labor, Mekhanikles had a suitable 
surface. First, he sent his several winged beetles flying in a circular 
pattern under the globe, laying down a platform of concrete. After the 
concrete dried, he sent another set of beetles to smooth, polish and 
whitewash the platform. "There," Mekhanikles said with satisfaction. "A 
tabula rasa!" He smirked at Sadira, who looked suitably impressed. 
	It was nice working for an audience who a) appreciated his 
genius, b) wasn't trying to thwart him and c) didn't have poofy hair. 
The fact that she was pretty didn't hurt at all. Of course, he'd never 
let a dirty centaur into his home, but still... she WAS pretty.
	"Now for the finishing touch, my dear," he said avuncularly. He 
raised his hand and a giant stinkbug rose from the ground and hovered 
over the the black globe. It began spraying a fine mist of blue over 
the globe, the mist rained through the globe onto the tabula rasa 
below. At the end of another hour, Mekhanikles had a perfect blue print 
of the Maze of Despair  printed neatly on the ground. At the center of 
the maze was a large circle.
	"What's that circle?" Sadira asked curiously. She offered 
Mekhanikles another apple, which he accepted.
	"That, my pretty, is the device which I am seeking," Mekhanikles 
said. "Now all we have to do is figure out the route into the center 
and out again," he added with satisfaction. He sent his favorite 
beetle, Scooter, to trace the route to the talisman.
	Another hour later, and Sadira felt like screaming. Scooter was 
tracing the route in red chalk, but every time he made a mistake, and 
there were a lot of them, Scooter had to erase the chalk and start 
again. She felt like kicking somebody. No, she felt like kicking 
Mekhanikles, even though he was being nice to her. Maybe because he was 
being nice to her. She didn't want to like a villain, yet she found 
herself liking the person who had tried to blow up Aladdin.
	She pulled her hand mirror out of her sleeve. "Any suggestions?" 
she asked.
	"Sorry, My Mistress," the Mask whispered. "But union rules forbid 
us to assist mortals in taking this particular maze."
	The silvery centaur touched Sadira's arm to calm her. She shot 
Aladdin a searching glance. Aladdin wasn't looking at her, he was 
eyeing the genie of the mirror. "We got into this mess because the 
image was backwards," he muttered. "Maybe we're still looking at this 
backwards."
	He walked around the blueprint of the maze, then stopped, 
studying the maze intently. Obviously, there was something visible from 
that angle that wasn't from this one.
	Aladdin walked over to Mekhanikles and took away the controls.
	Sadira gasped. What if Mekhanikles recognized him? He had a hood 
on, it's true, but Mekhanikles WAS a genius!
	"Start at the middle," Aladdin rasped. He walked back to Carpet 
as he directed Scooter towards the middle of the maze. Then he began 
directing the man sized beetle outwards.
	Mekhanikles sniffed. "Sure, if you want to cheat!" He walked over 
to Aladdin, arms crossed and a deep scowl on his face. Aladdin's method 
worked a lot faster, he only had to backtrack a few times. Soon, 
Aladdin's trail started to approach the trail Mekhanikles had worked 
out. Mekhanikles' scowl faded into something approaching grudging 
respect.
	"Not bad," he said. "You have a good eye for patterns."
	Aladdin shot him a glance, amused at being paid a compliment by 
Mekhanikles. However, he said nothing. He'd already pushed things way 
into the danger zone. The pattern of the Maze was clear now and he 
handed Scooter's controls back to Mekhanikles. Once the mad Greek 
inventor was deeply immersed in his work, Aladdin glanced around for 
Abu.
	Abu was back in monkey form. He and Carpet were in the process of 
abstracting Jasmine-genie's prison away from the oblivious Mekhanikles 
and substituting an identical bottle filled with something that looked 
like Genie. Aladdin glanced over to the blue roan centaur that Genie 
had turned himself into and raised an eyebrow. Genie just winked at 
him.
	Now that Mekhanikles had a map of the Maze, it was easy for him 
to manuever his next beetle into the Maze and have it returned with the 
prize in question. It was a diamond the size of an orange. The beetle 
deposited its prize into Mekhanikles hands.
	"Well, what have we here?" Mekhanikles gloated.
	"I AM THE CONQUEST STONE!" bellowed the diamond. 
	"Really?" Mekhanikles said. "And what do you conquer?"
	"ANYTHING!" The Conquest Stone paused. "INCLUDING ARROGANT 
MORTALS THAT POUR BLUE PAINT OVER ME!"
	"Oh, come now," Mekhanikles chided. "You can't be mad at me for 
that! If I hadn't poured paint over the Maze, I would never have 
liberated you, and you can't do any conquering from in there, can you?"
	If a diamond could have blinked, this one would have. "POINT 
TAKEN. WHAT DO YOU WISH TO CONQUER?"
	"First, tell me what the price of conquest is," Mekhanikles 
demanded. 
	"WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THERE'S A PRICE?" asked the Conquest Stone.
	"I'm a genius, you can't fool me! There's ALWAYS a price," 
Mekhanikles said dryly. "And yours is...?"
	"FOR EVERY CONQUEST YOU MAKE, I ALSO AM PERMITTED TO CONQUER 
SOMETHING."
	"And that something would be?"
	"MY CHOICE."
	"What do you want to conquer?" Mekhanikles wanted to know.
	"YOU'LL FIND OUT!"
	"Lovely," Mekhanikles muttered. "Do I use the stone to conquer 
Aladdin's ghost and then let it conquer what it pleases? What if it 
wants to conquer the world? Or even worse, Greece? Hmmm...."
	"I can take that decision off of your hands, Mekhanikles," 
Aladdin said in his own voice.
	It took Mekhanikles a few seconds to realize that it was the 
centaur speaking. Then he froze in shock. His hesitation was long 
enough for Aladdin to lunge for the Conquest Stone, only to have the 
Stone itself send him sprawling to the ground with a blast of green 
energy.
	"IS THIS MORTAL THAT YOU WISH TO CONQUER?" The Conquest Stone 
demanded.
	"Among other things," Mekhanikles said, catching his breath. "So, 
you aren't dead, after all!"
	"Nope," Aladdin admitted. "Fooled ya!" he added. He could feel 
Abu bounce onto his hindquarters. The monkey was moving on three paws, 
so Aladdin assumed he still had Jasmine-genie in the fourth paw.
	"You little... CONQUER HIM!" Mekhanikles held up the Conquest 
Stone. A beam of blood red light burst towards Aladdin. 
	Sadira lunged foward, interposing her magic mirror between 
Aladdin and Mekhanikles.
	"Conquer yer grandma," snapped the Genie of the Mirror.
	The beam bounced off the magic mirror and slammed into 
Mekhanikles. When the light faded, Mekhanikles was trussed in ruby 
colored chains. He held the Conquest Stone up to his telescoping eye. 
"I said, Conquer HIM, not me!" Mekhanikles snarled.
	"You should have called him by name," the Conquest Stone was 
actually subdued. "Then I could have gotten around this ridiculous 
bouncing off the mirror trick. Man, that one is older than the Maze!"
	"Sorry," Sadira said cheekily. "But it got old because it works." 
She deftly swiped the Stone from Mekhanikles fingers.
	"Et, tu?" Mekhanikles asked.
	Sadira actually blushed. "Well, I'm sorry. But it was my fault 
that Aladdin and I were turned into centaurs, and I had to do something 
or we really WOULD become ghosts." She shook her head sadly. "You know, 
if you weren't such a villain, I might actually like you!"
	She trotted over to help Aladdin to his feet. "Now what do we do 
with this?" she asked.
	The blue roan centaur puffed back into Genie and the red roan 
centaur with the white muzzle puffed into Iago wearing a white muzzle. 
(The only way to keep him quiet, trust me.)
	Mekhanikles frowned. 'Wait, if that's Aladdin's Genie, then the 
Genie in the bottle was... who?' He also noticed the absence of 
Princess Jasmine. 'So that's who the genie in the bottle was. She might 
make a good hostage, once I get free.' He had no doubt he'd get free. 
He may have been conquered, but he didn't have to stay conquered. Not 
when Scooter was nearby! And right now all the heroes were somewhat 
distracted.
	"We can't use him, guys," Aladdin sighed. "His price is too 
high."
	Abu had pried open the bottle by now and emptied Jasmine onto the 
palm of his hand. He set Jasmine carefully onto Aladdin's equine back, 
expecting her to change back to her true form and size. She changed 
back into her correct form, but remained small, much to Abu's surprise.
	"What do you mean?" Jasmine asked. She had to shout in order to 
make herself heard.
	"For every conquest we make, he gets to make one of his choosing. 
And he doesn't tell us what he intends to conquer."
	"Oh," Jasmine said. "I guess we have to put him back, then."
	"NOW, NOW, THERE'S NO NEED TO BE HASTY!" said the Conquest Stone. 
"WE CAN MAKE A DEAL!"
	"How about you don't go around conquering people anymore?" 
Aladdin asked.
	"I CANNOT DO THAT!" said the Conquest Stone. "IF I DID, THEN I 
WOULD NO LONGER BE THE CONQUEST STONE, I'D JUST BE A GIANT CHUNK OF 
CRYSTALIZED CARBON WITH NO SENTIENCE!"
	"Oh," Jasmine said. "You mean, you'd die?"
	"YES."
	Aladdin sighed. He really didn't want to kill anything, even a 
giant diamond with a  voice that was giving him a headache. "How about 
you promise to never conquer Agrabah or her allies?" he asked. 
	"I CAN'T MAKE A DEAL THAT NON-SPECIFIC. YOU WILL HAVE TO DEFINE 
ALLIES BETTER."
	Jasmine piped up. "Agrabah's allies consist of all those people 
who have signed treaties of non-aggression and/or trade agreements with 
my government or are currenly negotiating to do so."
	The Conquest Stone thought this over. "AGREED!"
	Aladdin took a deep breath. "Then I want you to conquer the spell 
that has turned Sadira and I into dying centaurs and return us to our 
true and healthy selves."
	Aladdin and Sadira were bathed in a blue beam. When it faded, two 
healthy humans had replaced the centaurs. They both sat down suddenly 
because they're senses of balance had grown accustomed to four feet.
	"Wow! I'm glad THAT'S over!" Aladdin said. "So, on to the next 
crisis!"
	"You sound certain that there will be a next crisis," Sadira 
said.
	"Well, there's still ME!" Mekhanikles exclaimed. Aladdin and 
Sadira jumped to their feet. Mekhanikles' beetle Scooter had freed him 
and now the mad Greek scientist was holding the bottle that Abu had 
substituted for Jasmine's prison.
	"Surrender or I will kill your precious princess!" Mekhanikles 
gloated.
	"Jasmine's not in there!" Aladdin exclaimed.
	Mekhanikles just laughed. "Don't try to fool me!" he gloated.
	"Why not?" Aladdin asked. "I'm getting pretty good at it."
	"YOU POOFY HAIRED..." incoherent with rage, Mekhanikles waved his 
fists in the air. The bottle slipped from his grasp and smashed against 
Scooter's brassy hide. The blue genie inside exploded with a puff of 
foul smelling blue smoke. Mekhanikles covered his face with his stola 
and leaped onto Scooter's back. 
	"I had some of Sadira's stew left," Genie explained.
	"Well, you may have won this round, but I still have things that 
go BOOM!" Mekhanikles pulled something out from his tunic and threw it 
in their direction. Then he and Scooter beat a hasty retreat.
	Genie formed a barrier just as Mekhanikles bomb exploded. This 
time there was no one in the line of fire.
	"Good job, Genie!" called Jasmine.
	"Thanks, Princess-woman!" Genie said. He one fingered zapped her 
to her normal size, then politely turned his back as she and Aladdin 
greeted each other.
	Sadira shook her head and politely turned away. She was happy to 
note that she didn't feel as miserable about this as she did a few days 
ago. Maybe she really was getting over her crush on Aladdin.
	For once, Iago had nothing nasty to say about the mush. He 
couldn't get free from Thundra's embrace long enough to do so.
	"So," Sadira asked the Conquest Stone. "What do you intend to 
conquer?"
	"THAT!" the Conquest Stone said with concentrated venom. A 
searing white light lanced from the Conquest Stone and into the black 
globe that housed the Maze of Despair. The black globe disappeared in a 
blaze of fireworks, causing Aladdin and Jasmine to jump apart. Jasmine 
tripped on some scattered beetle parts and fell.
	"Jasmine!" Aladdin cried, kneeling next to her.
	Jasmine clutched her ankle. "I think..."
	"Don't tell me it's broken!" shouted Iago.
	Jasmine grimaced. "Okay, I won't tell you."
	"I CAN CONQUER THAT BROKEN ANKLE, PRINCESS!" The conquest stone 
said.
	"I think I can make do with a bag of ice," Jasmine replied drily. 
"With any luck, it's only sprained."
	"I still think there should have been an easier way to cure Al 
and Sadira," muttered Iago.
	"Well, I don't know of one..." Aladdin interuppted himself by 
bursting into laughter. He laughed so hard that he sat down suddenly. 
"Oh, no, there WAS an easier way!"
	"WHAT?" the others, even the Genie of the Mirror and the Conquest 
Stone, demanded.
	"The Tree of Renewal," Aladdin said.
	Genie frowned. "But Al, we already went over that. Since you were 
changed from human to horse to centaur, the Tree of Renewal would have 
changed you to a horse... permanently."
	Aladdin shook his head. "But Sadira was changed from a human to a 
centaur."
	Jasmine slapped her forehead, mind mometarily taken off the pain 
in her ankle. "Then she could have been turned back into a human."
	Sadira clutched the sides of her head. "Then I could have done 
that mirror spell again."
	"Only the right way," the Genie of the Mirror added.
	"And turned Al back into a human," Genie finished.
	They looked at each other, then started laughing. 
	"Oh, let's go home," Aladdin said, when he could catch his 
breath.
	Sadira bandaged Jasmine's ankle and Aladdin tenderly lifted her 
to Carpet. Then they set course for Agrabh, with Iago and Genie arguing 
all the way.
	Iago: "You are SUCH a mook! Why didn't YOU think to use the Tree 
of Renewal to turn Sadira back into a human?"
	Genie: "You didn't think of it, either. So who is mookier? The 
mook or the mook that follows him?"

	The End, for now.