Part Three
 

The ride home was silent. Both were deep in thought, frustrated and upset. I should have stopped it, thought Marita.  If not for her own idea of the repercussions, Sean would have gladly continued to cherish her body and blow
her mind underneath the willow, but he stopped for her.  If up to Sean, Marita knew he would show her affection openly and tell the public be damned. But it was not the public Marita worried about it was the Logans. She loved them and would never cause harm to them and Sean's love for her would surely cause open disgrace for the family and the legacies to follow.

As they arrived at the stable, Sean dismounted and assisted Marita.  He made careful attention not to caress her waist or let his hands linger around the soft underside of her breasts.  Marita noticed the precise care in which he helped her, turned her back to him and commented,"Sean,  you could never have the touch of a stranger and it hurts me when you try," and
with that she walked away, sullen.

Sean brought the horses into the stable and handed them to a stable boy.  He had to think.  He was furious with himself and the way thier world worked. It was unlawful to marry Marita, though he loved her and he wouldn't compromise her without protecting her with his name and family.  Even at that moment his body ached for her and he couldn't have her.  Then he tries to show the proper distance between them in public and she accuses him of touching her as a stranger might.  She needed to be comforted and she wouldn't let him do it, and then she was upset because he tried to give her distance.

Did she expect him to continue to hold her that close and then not kiss her or carress her?  What she didn't know was that for him to continue holding her closely like that would have meant they would have finished what had begun underneath the willow.  He couldn't live like this anymore. They were
both on edge, and aggrevated. The slightest discrepency in behavior caused the other to draw back or become angry. Because they couldn't have each other, they began turning on each other out of frustration. This has to stop, he thought.

Monique ran a soft hand over the sky blue, brocade silk and then lifted the dress towards her body to inspect the reflection.
"Marita will fit nicely into this." she whispered to herself.  Marita walked into her bedroom, passed her cousin and sat with a thump on the edge of her bed. She threw her self back and pounded angry fists into her quilt.

"Not a pleasant ride I see.." said Monique with a raised brow., "This is for you" she announced.

Marita turned her head towards her cousin and questioned, "It's beautiful.  Where will I wear it?  It is not as if Sean can take me anywhere."

"Ahhhh,.." said Monique, " It seems short interludes no longer are bearable, are you biting at eachother because you can not experience the "proper" course of courting."

Maria stared at her older cousin and asked suspiciously "How would you know how I'm feeling?"

"Sweetheart," Monique said with a knowing grin, " I am from New Orleans, there we love like the French, only it's spicier.  Do you think you are the only colored lady to be in love with a white man?  It happens to my friends all of the time, some are the mistresses to the richest politicians in Louisiana. This relationship can flourish, yet discretion is the key."

"We do not want an affair, we want marriage, Monique and respectablity" said Marita, in a hopeless tone.

Monique turned to Marita, "Marriage you will never have my dear, respectability in your own right is possible but noone will respect your lives together, and it seems that your lack of an affair is putting you both on tenter hooks and making you snap at one another."

"What do we do?" Marita asked.

"Love him, Marita and thank God you found someone in this world that adores every intellegent word that comes from your lips, be he colored, white or green. I haven't found someone that can understand why I know the strategic moves of Hannibal during warfare or Socrates' theories. I am felt as a pretty threat to male intellegence.  Don't let others stop you from making a commitment you could have had long ago."

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