Greg brought up the subject almost as an afterthought, one night when they were eating. "Do you want to go back to school and take some classes?"
"I don't know. Why do you ask?" She wasn't sure what he was thinking.
"I just wondered. You used to talk about it, but you haven't said anything lately. I thought maybe you might want to give it a shot."
"I don't know where I'd find the time."
"You could cut back at work. It wouldn't be that difficult, would it?"
Since the time she had moved in, Greg had never asked for her to pay for anything, always covering the expenses and allowing her to keep all the money she made without question. "I guess it wouldn't, but I'm not sure I could go back now. It would take an adjustment."
"I just want you to do something that would make you happy. Do you think you'd be happy doing what you do now for 5 more years?"
She knew he was right, but she was worried that there was some underlying reason for his sudden interest in her education. "Let me think about it, OK?"
"Just keep in mind that it's an option. I don't want you to give up your ambitions because you think that it's not an option."
Greg began to wonder about Jill. She was becoming increasingly defensive about little things that before had been no problem. He made every attempt to involve her in decisions, but she offered only resistance at worst, non-commital responses at best. She frustrated Greg in a way that he never could have imagined her doing. For her part, Jill saw Greg as trying to control everything in their lives, from where they went, to how much food to buy. She saw a subtle manipulation occuring, and she tried to ward it off by not giving in. He talked about the future, but Jill wanted only to deal with the present. The worst part, in her mind, was when he would yield to the way she wanted to do things, thinking it was further evidence that he was trying to control her for his own purposes.
Jill felt the same pattern was re-emerging from her past experience with Rick. He had completely dominated their whole relationship, going so far as to tell Jill what she should or shouldn't wear. She hadn't been as forceful with him, thinking that he knew what he wanted from her, and that she should follow along, so as not to lose him. The issue had finally come to a head when he yelled at her one night when he thought she was being a bit too friendly with another guy. After that, he rarely let her out of his sight, not trusting her to even make a phone call without him being close enough to listen in. She tried in vain to assure him that she wasn't doing anything suspicious or wrong, but the attacks continued. He called her terrible things, and she spent a lot of time in tears, not understanding why he would treat her like a dog. The night he slapped her across the face during an argument was the last one she saw him. There was no way she was going to end up dead because he couldn't control his anger. She felt guilty for a long time after, thinking that it was her fault, that she had caused him to mistrust her. She didn't think she was a terrible person, but she refused to be consoled by that fact. It wasn't until she had started to hang out with Dianne's friends that she finally regained some of her self-esteem. But the scars of the abuse she had taken for Rick weren't quite healed when she got the notion that Greg might be someone she would like to know better.
For Valentine's Day, Greg asked her if she wanted to go to a movie. He had bought her a simple bracelet and some flowers. She let her guard down and began to wonder if maybe she was wrong about Greg. They followed the movie by going dancing. It was a spontaneous decison on Greg's part, but one which she didn't object to. He felt like she was back to her old self again; as they danced, she was smiling and playful, and he thought she looked wonderful in the flashing lights. They walked home, arm in arm through the cold, clear night. When they got home, he took her in his arms and looked into her eyes. "Have I told you how much I love you, how beautiful you are?"
"Yes, but it doesn't hurt to hear it again."
"Everytime I look at you, I see someone who makes me feel like I don't have to worry about anything in the world. When you're unhappy, it makes me unhappy."
"You know what would make me happy?
"What?"
"Let's go somewhere. A vacation. Somewhere warm, where we don't have to do anything if we don't want to."
He brushed a strand of hair out of her eyes, and smiled. "OK. We could do that. Where do you want to go?"
"I don't know. You choose. But lets go as soon as we can."
He nodded. "Alright. I'll look into it tomorrow."
She kissed him and they held each other tightly.