The Olympic champ loves her father -but not the way he controlled her money & her life. So at 17, she went to court to win her freedom.
My father started me in in gymnastics when I was 3 years old. He'd competed as a teenager in Romania, and I guess he wanted his first child to live the dream he never got to live. I really got into the sport when I was 7 and lived in Tampa. I would go to the gym and have a blast. When I was 9, we moved to Houston because my dad wanted me to train with the best-Bela Karolyim the legendary boach of champions like Mary Lou Retton and Nadia Comaneci. At the time, I thought it was normal that my parents would move just for my sport. Now, I realize what a sacrfice it was.
There was always pressure from my parents. I had talent, and they saw it, and they wanted me to be the best that I could be. But sometimes they got a little too pushy, a little too involved-especially my father.
Gymnastics was my life, and competing in the '96 Olympics was my dream. At 14 I was the youngest member of the U.S. team in Atlanta. It was exciting walking to walk into the Arena-and walk away with a gold medal. It amazes me how much I accomplished. The year after the Olympics was difficult. Bela retired and I couldn't find anyone to fill his shoes. I started growing and gaining weight, and I had to get used to my new body. I felt fatigued all the time. Competitions didn't go as well as I excpected, and there was always pressure from my parents. When I got to high school, I saw alot of gymnasts leave the sport, and I started to get lonely because my friends were dropping out. I didn't want to scarfice my life to gymnastics anymore; I wanted to go to school and be normal. But my parents said "This is how it has to be."
Then my dad found a wonderful new coach for me, Luminita Miscenco, from Romania. She made me feel good about gymnastics again-and at the 1998 Goodwill Games in New York, I became the first American ever to win the all-around competition.
After the high of that win came one of the lowest points of my life. Things were getting pretty tough at home. There was a lot of stress. Part of the problem was my father's overprotectivemess. He wouldn't let me date; sometimes he wouldn't even let me hang out with my friends' houses or go to the movies. It's normal for a father to be protective of his daughter. But sometimes you've got to let go and say, "I trust you."
Money was part of the dispute too. I found out that a lot of money from my trust fund had gone to build a gym in Houston. I'd worked hard all my life for that money and I thought it should have been put away for my future. My parents felt that the income from the gym would meet my financial needs-but what if it didn't? Then, in October 1998 my dad and my coach had an argument at the gym, and he fired her-without asking me. I said "What am I going to do?" He said, "You can quit gymnastcis or get a new coach!" I'd already been considering moving out on my own. Now I thought "It's time."
Even so, leaving home was really very painful. I love my family and didn't want to hurt them. I was scared and worried, and I was only 17, but I thoguht about the tough times and said to myself "I've got to take this step, or I'll never get control of my life."
A few days later I moved my stuff when my parents were out of the house, because I knew they wouldn't let me go, and went to stay with my coach Luminita. I didn't make a rapid decision, I had tought about it on and off for a year. But it was very painful when I had my lawyer ask a judge to declare my legally emancipated from my parents. It was a hard choice for me, but I needed that freedom. My parents were shocked because I hadn't talked to them about it. "You should come home!" they said. I was really sad and hated that it had come down to this. I had plenty of nights when I sat down crying because I wanted this to be over. But I knew it was the right thing.
I liked being responsible for myself, and later, having my own apartment. But I still missed my family. I didn't talk to my dad, but I spoke to my mom and my 10-year-old sister Christina, whom I'm very close. Mom would ask "Why don't you just come home? we miss you." I'd say "Mom I can't." I think she saw why I left, but for a while it seemed nobody understood my side, and that hurt.
My dad was really upset over my going to court, and about all the media attention. Too much of my face was plastered on the TV. It affected my privacy and my life, and I just wanted to have my family's personal problem taken care of. Once, not long after I was declared emancipated, my dad followed me home. It made me nervous, so I asked the court to issue a restraining order keeping him away from me.
When I moved out, I was in the best shape of my life. But I took four months off from training to deal with everything-and that's alot for a gymnast. In February, I moved to the US Olympic Training Center in Colorado Springs with my coach Luminita-whom I'd hired back-to train for the 2000 Olympics. As the agility came back and my body got stronger, so did the feeling that I'd done the right thing, and that I was ready to see my family. I went home for a few days over Easter and talked to my dad for the first time since October. My mom had been inviting me to come in our phone calls, I'd asked her if my dad even wanted to see me again. She said, "Yes of course he does." So before I went back to Houston-where I stayed with friends-the restraining order was lifted.
Neither of us said anything for the first 10 minutes. I was teary-eyed and emotional, and we argued a bit, about old stuff. I said "I didn't come here to argue, I'm going to leave." My mom said "C'mon guys, make up." and my dad calmed down. The next day was a lot better. We didn't talk about much, but it was a start. We're both proud and stubborn, but I think I gave in more. I've worked at trying to understand my dad's point of view. But I still don't know is he understands mine.
In April, my parents came to visit me in Colorado Springs, and it went really well. I'm still in charge of my financial and career decisions, which I take very seriously. All I ever wanted was to be happy and make myself and my parents proud. Things got out of hand, but I have a lot better understanding of them as people. They aren't goint to change so I can try to adapt.
This summer I missed the US Gymnastics Championship because I have a stress fracute in my back. I had to take threee months off to let it heal, so I also had arthroscopic surgery on my right knee for a chronic injury that's been bothering me. It's an operation that I hope will improve my performace at the 2000 Olympics.
Competing will be hard. I'll be 19 on the last day of the Sydney games-practically a grandma! After that, I'd like to go to collegem then try modeling and acting, or maybe broadcasting. I really don't have anything to prove, except to myself. I'll give the Olympics my best shot and then see where life leads me.
