VI

Thursday, August 3, 2000

Emmy and I decided to spend the day in Salisbury, Maryland about 30 miles from my home. With a population of around 21,000, it's the biggest town around.

We planned to meet at my house in Ocean Pines at 10am. Emmy arrived about ten minutes early with doughnuts. After our "healthy and nutritious" breakfast, I showed Emmy how I'd changed my room around since the last time she was there. I showed Emmy some of my recent drawings and made sure I turned on my VCR ta record Andy Griffith, before we left.

As we were walking out the door, Emmy said she'd prolly have to move her car because she thought she might have blocked someone in. Did she ever! Her car was parked in our driveway DIAGONALLY, blocking both cars in! I don't know how she managed THAT! Then when Emmy went to move her car, she realized that she didn't have her keys. We walked back to my front door, just as my mom opened it, dangling Emmy's keys in her hand. It took Emmy TWO tries to get her car in the driveway straight.

Then we were off! For Wal-Mart in West Ocean City, at least. I needed to pick up my paycheck so I'd have some money to go shopping. My brother was working that morning (he pushes carts and stuff there) so I introduced Emmy to him. It seems whenever I do anything with Emmy, my brother is working so she never gets ta see him!

Recent new rules at work said that associates could pick up their paychecks on Thursdays in the personel office between 10am and 12pm. It was a little after 10:30, so I figured I'd be quick in and out. I stopped Tracy, head of personel, and asked if I could get my money. She said the paychecks were in receiveing! I asked why and she didn't know. I asked Tracy if she knew who was giving out the checks. She said Paula (the store manager) was... but when I came in I had seen Paula talking to Ron, the Lawn and Garden department manager! I found Paula and asked her if she was giving out the paychecks. She said they had them in receiving and I followed her all the way to the back (a dark and scary place) and sure enough, there was a dingy table in the area right in front of where they unload the trucks with Assistant Manager Dee sitting behind it! The whole scene reminded me of some shady location, home of assorted illegal activites, like ya see in movies. I asked Dee, if this is how they were going to give out paychecks now. She said, "I don't know, this is what Paula was doing". I tell ya, NOTHING they do at Wal-Mart surprises me anymore! Emmy and I returned to the car where I filled out my bank slips as Emmy drew on her hand. Then we headed to the bank to get my moneys.

Finally, we were REALLY off! It was about 11am as we headed to Salisbury. We took Old Ocean City Road all the way there. It's the scenic route past all the little towns and farms instead of the big Route 50 highway. I told Emmy ta sit back and enjoy the ride because today was her day to relax.

The first store we went to in Salisbury was the Atlantic Book Warehouse, a HUGE sister store to the little bookshop, Atlantic Bookstore, that Emmy works at in Ocean City. Emmy said, "I don't see why they need to have a bookstore this big".

We looked around for awhile and "awwed" over all the cute puppies in this book I found in the Pets section. Emmy found Pinky and the Brain seek and find books for $1 a piece! I bought 3... one for me and two ta sell on eBay. Emmy got a book and was able ta get her 35% discount because she worked at an Atlantic Bookstore.

When I went ta pay for my books, I realized I had left my money in the car! Some ppl had to wait in line for me as I ran for my money. When I returned, Emmy jokingly blamed me for that, but I insisted it wasn't my fault. Those ppl CHOSE ta stand in line because WE were. It always happens that way: there will be nobody buying anything and then one person will go to check out and everybody else in the store will suddenly be compelled too do the same... I've learned this working at Wal-Mart: ppl see a line and they HAVE to stand in it!

After the Atlantic Book Warehouse, Emmy and I went to Sam's Club because she'd never been in one. I told Emmy how I'd have to go potty when we got in there because it always seems whenever I go into Sam's Club, I gotta potty!

We went to look at the videos and CDs and computer games. Emmy told me of her foolproof method of selecting the right games for her computer: if they're under $20, they'll work! How scientific is THAT? I asked her what she'd do when the currently expensive ones went down in price. She said that she'd hopefully have a new computer by that point.

Then we searched for free samples in the food department... all we found were sausage patties... Then I pottied while Emmy got a soda.

After Sam's Club, I asked Emmy if she was hungry. She sure was! We went to Applebee's for lunch. I got the chicken quesadillas and ice tea and Emmy got the popcorn shrimp and a Diet Coke.

After lunch we went to Petsmart and looked at the animals... Emmy said when she got her own apartment, she wanted to get a cat. She also wants a lizard.

Next we hopped over to Fruitland and visted the new Wal-Mart Supercenter. Emmy mentioned how her boss at the bookstore lives near there and that his daughters have jobs there. I called it a Super Wal-Mart. I believe Emmy thought "Super Wal-Mart" would make a bad superhero.

We bi-passed all the grocery stuff at the Super Wal-Mart and looked at the electronics department. I learned the same thing about the Super Wal-Mart that Emmy discovered about the Atlantic Book Warehouse: Even tho the place is bigger, doesn't mean that it has more stuff than the smaller store you work in, it just has more copies of the same stuff!

I bought a little Digimon toy at Wal-Mart. I don't really watch the show, but I love this one character I saw once, and they finally made a toy of her. We checked out the Lawn and Garden department and then checked out through Lawn and Garden. The cashier gave me the wrong change. I gave her two ones, three quarters, and a dime. I should have gotten six cents back.

CASHIER: [to co-worker] psst! I typed in $2.80 when I should have typed $2.85. What do I do now?
ME: [mumbling] Call a CSM...
CASHIER: [grinning, to me] You work here?
ME: (what I wanted to say) No, dummy, that's why I gave you my Wal-Mart associate discount card. (what I really said) No, I work at the Wal-Mart over in Ocean City.

I had three associates digging through their pockets, trying to find a nickel so that they didn't hafta call someone to open the register drawer! After I got my five cents, I did something silly, I gave the penny, the cashier had originally given me, back to her. No wonder she looked at me funny! Who's the dummy, now?

When Emmy and I left Wal-Mart, the sky had gotten real dark. Where had the sun gone? It now looked like it was going to storm. Emmy was happy because if it rained, less people would come into her boardwalk store.

As we headed in the direction of "home" we planned to swing by the shopping center with the Toys R Us, the pet store, and the comic book store. We saw some really groovy-faboo lightning on our way there!

I was almost 3pm when we got to the shopping center and Emmy had to be in work at five, so I suggested we skip Toys R Us and just go to the pet store and the comic book store.

Inside the Salisbury Super Pet they were playing a Beatles song. Of course I pointed that out. After the song ended, I heard ANOTHER Beatles song, and then another one... and then... well, you get the idea. I don't know what they were listening to in there, but it wasn't a CD, because I could kinda hear an announcer talking between songs.

Emmy got to see her first "skinny pig". It's like a genetically engineered hairless guinea pig. I can't believe that people pay good money for some lab's genetic mistakes.

We played with some puppies (Jack Russell Terrier, Dachshund, Doberman, Chihuahua), looked at some snakes and lizards, pet some baby ducks and guinea pigs and bunnies, and after we fondled some pussies (CATS, you sicko, PUSSY CATS) we left and walked over to the comic book store.

In Comics Etc... I bought a bunch of back issues of Xena Magazine and Xena comic books that I missed since the summer started. Emmy bought some comics too and then we headed for home.

On the drive home, the storm caught up with us... or maybe we caught up with it! As we drove to my house along Route 50, it began raining... then pouring! It was raining so hard we could barely see the car twenty feet in front of us. Lightning hit so close a few times, that you couldn't actually see the bolt, just a blinding flash, and then the thunder rattled the car! I was only driving about 30 - 35 MPH on the 55 MPH road, but it felt like we were going faster. The storm lasted most of the ride home. It was noisy! It was exciting! It was scary! We loved it!

By the time we had pulled into my driveway, it had stopped raining. At least it was long enough for Emmy to get out of my car and into her own. The clouds over Ocean Pines were getting darker and it was threatening to storm again any minute. Emmy and I said our goodbyes and agreed that we had a great time. Just then the thunder went, "RUUUUUMMMBLE..." and Emmy looked up at the looming sky and said, "Yes, we know you had fun too!"

Get Back, Wakkanne, Get Back!