Steve enters, wearing all black, and waving to the crowd. He hugs and kisses Rosie, walks to his chair, bows to the audience two times, and sits down.
Rosie: "First of all....." (Steve gets comfortable in his chair) "First of all, there you are on General Hospital talking to Roger Colrich(sp?) from Ryan's Hope."
Steve: "Yes I was."
Rosie: "Ron Hale."
Steve: "Ron Hale."
Rosie: "You were. He played Delia's brother on Ryan's Hope, did you know that?"
Steve: (laughs) "He's told me a bunch of times, yeah."
Rosie: (laughing) "Yeah?"
Steve: "Yeah, he's made it a point to tell me "I was on Ryan's Hope."
Rosie: "Yeah, when I saw him at the Emmy's I was like 'Roger is alive!' because I hate it when, you know, the people switch shows. You've only been on GH, right?"
Steve: "Ahhh, sorta."
Rosie: "What else were you on?"
Steve: "Ah, I was on Days Of Our Lives for about 3 months." (the audience cheers, and Steve takes a drink)
Rosie: "You see, I don't like that now Steve, I don't like that."
Steve: "Neither do I, I never mention it really but you asked me so I had to tell you the truth."
Rosie: "How long were you on that other one?"
Steve: "Ah, about 3 months."
Rosie: "And who did you play on that one?"
Steve: "Ahh..." (sorta laughs) "Oh gosh, Harris Michaels, something about Eve was, it's a whole thing." (making a face) "I don't even know, can't remember. I have brain damage now, so....."
Rosie: "You do, I heard. Yeah."
Steve: "Yeah."
Rosie: "Now you were the nice, lovely Jason Quartermaine....."
Steve: "Pre-med....."
Rosie: "Born in, I think, 1984 when I was in college....."
Steve: (laughs) "1982, yeah....."
Rosie: "Now you're a grown up adult....."
Steve: "I'm 25, yeah....."
Rosie: "That's how it happens on a soap and no one cares." (audience laughs)
Steve: "Boarding school....."
Rosie: "And you were a nice guy?"
Steve: "Yeah, I was a....."
Rosie: "With Robin?"
Steve: "The nice guy, pre-med, the family....."
Rosie: "Everything was fine....."
Steve: "Everything was a dream....."
Rosie: "Little car accident....."
Steve: "Little, as smart as I was, I hopped into a car with a drunk....."
Rosie: "Hmmm...not good."
Steve: "Not good, got thrown from the car like a crash test dummy....."
Rosie: "Jason....."
Steve: (cringes) "Yes."
Rosie: "Yes."
Steve: "Hit my head on a rock, woke up with hair like a chia pet...." (motions to his head) "And here I am." (audience laughs and applauds)
Rosie: "And if that wasn't enough, you are now running the mob!"
Steve: "That's believable, isn't it?"
Rosie: "Come on!" (Steve puts his head down and laughs) "Now what's going on with that? And now you're pretending, you're helping the baby, that's really not your baby is it. It's your brother's baby right?"
Steve: "No, it's not my baby, yeah, it's my brother's baby. But I love the kid, it's cool. I never really got to work with babies before."
Rosie: "Really."
Steve: "So when I first held him, you know, he's a preemie so I'd have to hold him and I'm like....." (motions with his hands like he's holding a baby, with a nervous look on his face) "They're like relax, it's ok, it's ok, don't worry but I never had, like, kids do their....." (pauses, makes a face) ".....business on me?" (audience laughs)
Rosie: "Yeah, sure, it happens."
Steve: "You know, number 1, number 2, number 3, whatever." (audience laughs)
Rosie: "Yeah."
Steve: "So we were doing this scene, and the kids get 20 minutes a day, um, so, all I had to do was pick him up out of the incubator and take him out, and that was the whole shot."
Rosie: "Right....."
Steve: "So the stage manager counts down 5-4-3-2, I hear....." (makes a fart noise, Rosie and the audience laugh) "....and I'm like, there's no way I'm sticking my hands in that incubator!" (Rosie and the audience laugh)
Rosie: "Oh, you're afraid of a little baby poop?"(Rosie and Steve laugh)
Steve: "I don't think, I'm not really, well, I'm getting used to it now so....."
Rosie: "Was it the kind that exploded right through the diaper?" (audience reacts) "Cuz....have you, you haven't experienced that yet, you don't have any children."
Steve: (makes a face) "No."
Rosie: "Wait until you have them, you're showing your friends, 'Isn't she adorableeeewwww.'"(Rosie pretends that she's holding a baby, and slowly moves her hand away from where it's bottom would be)
Steve: (laughing) "Ewww, no!"
Rosie: "Right through the tights, it's lovely to look forward to."
Steve: "I guess it's, I guess it's good training."
Rosie: "Speaking of babies, you have parents, I take it." (Steve is about to take a drink of water. He holds the cup, raises his eyebrows, nods his head ‘yes', and takes a drink) "I was wondering what mom thought of this?" (Rosie holds up the Playgirl issue with Steve on the cover. The audience screams, and Steve tries to quiet them down. He almost seems embarrassed as he nods his head, and takes the magazine and puts it face down on Rosie's desk) "Um, I didn't look through sir....."
Steve: (laughing, pointing to the magazine) "You had to, didn't you?"
Rosie: "Would you be nude in there, Steve?"
Steve: "No, I would not." (audience members saying "ohhhhhhh)."
Rosie: "You would not be nude."
Steve: "No, no." (Steve turns to the audience) "Don't 'Oh!' I don't want to be next to the lawnmower man in there when his thing's like.....mowing the lawn."
Rosie: (Rosie, Steve and the audience are laughing) "Where is that guy?" (She picks up the magazine) "Let me look through.....I didn't see....." (they both laugh, and so does the audience) "No, and here's you on the inside in your bathrobe looking, you know, like....." (audience screams) "Alright now look, they call you up, they say "We want you on the cover of Playgirl', and you say....."
Steve: "Sure I'm not working."
Rosie: "Why not."
Steve: "Why not."
Rosie: "This is before you were on the show?"
Steve: "No, this is while I was on the show when I was the, the old Jason and I wasn't working that, all that much, so I was just trying to do, you know, get out there a little bit. My mom called me actually, I told her. First question was 'Uh, will you be nude?' and I was like 'No' and she was like 'Oh, thank God.' So it comes out, she calls me and she said that all the ladies in her church group loved it." (the audience laughs)
Rosie: "Really?"
Steve: "Yeah."
Rosie: "Well, that will tell you something."
Steve: "Yeah, they're all about 55-60, you know....."
Rosie: "And they all get their subscriptions to Playgirl." (Steve laughs) "Which is scary, isn't it?"
Steve: "Very!"
Rosie: "At the church bake sale, they're like, 'Who's gonna make the cookies, and who's gonna pick up the Playgirls?' (Steve and the audience laugh. He takes a drink) 'Gertrude, ok, you get the Playgirl, Mary, you make the cookies.'" (the audience applauds and laughs) "Now, the 35th anniversary of GH is on....."
Steve: "April 2nd."
Rosie: "April 2nd....."
Steve: "I believe, yes."
Rosie: "Can you, it's hard to believe that it's been on that long, huh?"
Steve: "Yeah, I never watched it before I got on, so....." (audience laughs)
Rosie: "You never watched it?"
Steve: "No."
Rosie: "I've watched it for years."
Steve: "I know!"
Rosie: "I've watched it since the Luke & Laura days." (the audience applauds and screams. Steve nods his head) "Since Leslie and Rick. Where are they might I ask......where is Leslie and Rick?"
Steve: "I don't know, but I think I'm wearing his jacket now on the show." (audience laughs)
Rosie: "No kidding!
Steve: "Yeah. It's an old leather jacket, I look like Fonzie, that's what they did, they put me in the mob."
Rosie: "Yeah, that's gotta be Rick's."
Steve: "Oh, it's horrible."
Rosie: "Yeah, he went through a phase too, he fell off a motorcycle and boom!"
Steve: "Hit his head....."
Rosie: "Joined a cult. And you know what? His hair looked like a chia pet." (audience and Steve laugh)
Steve: "There it is."
Rosie: "There it is, it all comes around. Well, it's delightful to see you."
Steve: "Well, thank you for having me." (Rosie and Steve shake hands) "I appreciate it."
Rosie: "Thanks for being here, and congratulations on the success of the show."
Steve: "Thanks a lot, thank you."
Rosie: "Steve Burton!" (the audience cheers and applauds. Steve waves to them. Rosie picks up the Playgirl and waves it into the camera).
