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MITCH: Something wierd happened to me this morning. CHRIS: Was it a dream where you see yourself standing in sort of sungod robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you? MITCH: No. CHRIS: Why am I the only person that has that dream? So what happened. MITCH: Did you know there's a guy living in our closet? CHRIS: You've seen him too? MITCH: Why does he go in there? CHRIS: Why do you go in there? MITCH: To get my clothes, but that's not why he goes in there. CHRIS: Of course not, he's twice your size! Twenty points higher than me, thinks a big guy like that can wear his clothes? Think before you ask these questions, Mitch. CHRIS: Molls and trolls. MITCH: What? CHRIS: Molls and trolls, molls and trolls, work, work, work, work, work. We plan this thing for weeks and all they want to do is study! I'm sorry, it's not like me, I'm depressed! We had enter the mutant hamster races. We had, what, one entry for the Madam Curry look-a-like contest. Why do I bother? CHRIS: You see, Mitch, I used to be you, and lately, I've been missing me so I asked Hathaway if I could room with me again and he said sure! I put all your clothes away, shirts, pants, shoes...I had a little trouble with the sports jacket so I threw it out. Duck! (Mitch ducks) Nice reflexes! I'm Chris Knight. MITCH: Oh no. CHRIS: Oh yes! Duck again! Oh my God! It's headed for the gas tanks! Duck! Would you classify that as a launch problem or a design problem. CHRIS: Would you be prepared if gravity reversed itself? MITCH: Well...I... CHRIS: I just can't figure out how to keep the change in my pockets. I got it! Nudity! HATHAWAY: I want to start seeing more of you in the lab. CHRIS: Fine, I'll gain weight. MITCH: Whatcha doin'? CHRIS: Self realization. I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates who said..."I drank what?" HATHAWAY: What are you looking at? You're laborers! You should be laboring! That's what you get for not having an education! CHRIS: Hello Your Jogginess. HATHAWAY: Knight! Right on time! That's a little unusual these days. You still run? CHRIS: Only when chased. HATHAWAY: What's that smell? CHRIS: Must be the dog. HATHAWAY: That's popcorn! CHRIS: Yes sir, I know. HATHAWAY: I hate popcorn! Get it away from me! Come on, throw it over there! CHRIS: (after dropping the popcorn on Hathaway's porch) Good, now I know what to get you for your birthday!

There are so many more quotes that I intend to put here but first I have to start my other quotes pages. Don't worry, I will definitely be back soon!!!!

If I have left out any important quotes, please e-mail me at

jneely@nunic.nu.edu


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