How To Cure Yourself of TOW BSB Syndrome


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Common Names: TOW BSB stand for Totally Obsessed With Backstreet Boys. The most common form of this is called Teenybopper. All Teenyboppers suffer from TOW BSB Syndrome. Also, many people that call themselves 'True Fans' or 'Real Fans' suffer from TOW BSB. If you can take a joke about the Backstreet Boys, or laugh at one, you usually are not considered to have TOW BSB, or you may have a very weak case. To find out if you qualify, read 'symptoms'.


Symptoms:
For mild, or weak cases: Can't go for more than a day without seeing a picture of the BsB. Can listen to music other than BsB, but they are still your first choice. Have at least one poster. Buy any magazine that has an article with a BsB in it. Own 2 or more of their cd's. Own at least one video.
Strong cases (True fans, Teenyboppers): All of mild or weak cases symptoms, 3 or more posters, and are more insistant on listening to BsB music, but can stand others. They also own at least 3 Backstreet Boys cd's (ie album, singles, imported albums) Have at least 2 videos. Have watched as many specials or interviews with Backstreet Boys as they can, and have gotten their hands on as many interviews as possible.
Extreme cases (worst possible case scenario): Have every single BsB cd ever released, have every poster they can find, refuse to listen to any other music besides BsB, Have every video ever made, have watched every BsB special ever been (including ones from other countries) and know every BsB interview by heart. Are positive you are going to marry a BsB when you grow up.This condition is rare, but existing in many countries. It is extremely hard to cure, but it's been done.


How to cure yourself:
Just follow these simple steps correctly and you should have yourself cured in no time. If they don't work then you must not be putting your heart and soul into it.

Step 1: Visualize your goal. Try visualizing that you are a soccer ball in front of a soccer goal and the BsB are the goalies. Imagine yourself trying to get through their defense. Why you ask? I don't know, it just sounds like a good way to visualize your goal.

Step 2: Make sure you are doing what you want. If you don't want to stop being totally obssesed, than there is no way you will ever cure yourself.

Step 3: Make a joke about the BsB. Try it. It's not that hard. For starters, try nick is gay jokes. They are easy. Then, maybe something like 'Does Brian know he's not dancing to the beat?' and if you like them, you could even try some 'Howie is a troll' jokes.

Step 4: Visit BsB Humor sites and try and laugh at all the jokes they make. Come on, just try it. Matt's is good or Cheryl's is good, or even Mine (Caroline's) is a good one.

Step 5: Visit anti-Bsb sites and try and laugh. Try and restrain yourself from writing hate mail at least.

Step 6: Make fun of each of the Backstreet Boys individually. This is one of the hardest steps, especially if you have a favorite. Try these
Kevin-He's a turtle. He's slow and stupid. He probably can't sing because he's never had a solo on the cd exept talking. He's just a big clumsy train.
AJ-He's a fashion starter wannabe. He's idol is Scary Spice. He does crack.
Howie-He looks like a troll. He's got ugly jerri curls. He's got pubic hair on his head. He's got some lump or something in his eye.
Brian-He's in love with nick. He looks like a fish. He looks like an alien. He's so boring! He can't dance.
nick-He's gay. He's so ugly. He's gay. He's so ego-tistical. He's gay. He's just plain stupid. He's gay.

Step 7: Make fun of everything they do. Watch your BsB videos and leave nothing untouched or not laughed at.

If you have an extreme case, you also might one to try one of the following:

Burn a BsB poster you have. Try it, come on. You may cry as you're doing it but after you're done you may find it somewhat funny.

Draw on BsB pictures you have as to make them look stupid (ie, mustaches, devil horns, etc)

Read that Spin article in the July '98 issue about the boys. That might have you hating 'em real quick.


If you have followed all the steps correctly, and were intent of ridding yourself of this awful disease, your TOW BSB Syndrome should be gone, and you can get back to loving the boys, but can also laugh when someone makes a joke about them.


Do you have any other ways die hard fans can get rid of their obssesion with the boys? E'mail 'em!.


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