His sense of hearing came back first. He heard a steady beeping close to his ear. Muted voices spoke in quiet tones. Smells came to him next and he sniffed discreetly. Antiseptic and medicine filled his nostrils. ~A hospital. I'm in a hospital. But how did I get here?~ He listened again and this time heard the steady, soft snoring of someone at his bedside and the soothing rhythm of a heartbeat. He opened his eyes.

The white walls of a hospital room greeted him. He moved his head slowly to his right and saw Sandburg. ~Well I remember what happened at the bank but I still don't remember who I am. Wonder why the kid is here? He should be getting some sleep.~ He was struck by deja vu as he smelled the scent of cigars and knew whoever was coming was heading for his room.

The door opened then and a large black man stepped in. He smiled slightly and nodded his head in greeting. ~It's Simon.~ The name floated unbidden through his mind. ~Well I remember something. It's a start.~

Simon walked over over to the kid and shook him gently. "Hey Sandburg, time to wake up." The kid immediately woke up looking slightly disoriented. His blue eyes focused on Jim and smiled. Jim felt comforted that the kid was here although he still didn't know why.

"Hey Jim, you're finally awake!"

Jim opened his mouth to speak but no sound came out. Blair grabbed some water for him to drink. The cool liquid soothed his throat and Jim tried again.

"How. . . long?" he rasped out.

"You've been unconscious for 2 days. You have a bullet wound in your left shoulder. It went completely through but you were in a coma from blood loss."

Jim nodded at this.

"So ummmm, do you remember anything more?" Sandburg looked at him hopefully. Jim felt bad as he shook his head in the negative. The hopeful spark in the expressive blue eyes of his partner dimmed.

Simon sighed. "Nothing at all?"

"Well I remember your name Simon but that's about it. I don't remember anything besides what you told me, Sandburg."

"You had us all worried there Jim. I had Rafe, Brown, and Taggart looking everywhere for you!" Jim gave Simon a blank look at the names. He felt a faint sense of familiarity wash over him but that was it. Simon noticed his look of confusion and waved off his questions. "Never mind Jim, you'll meet them when you get out of here."

Jim spent a week in the hospital recuperating and was finally released, much to the happiness of the nurses. His memory remained fragmented however, much to the disappointment of Simon and Blair.

In the parking lot under the hospital, Sandburg led him toward the Volvo.

"You drive this thing?"

"Hey! It's a classic man!"

"Yeah, from the stoneages." Jim muttered. He moved into the low car.

"Sorry man, your truck is still in the shop. You can't drive with one arm anyway. Oh, if the pain gets to be too much for you to handle even with the dials, I've got some pain medication. You are going to take them if the pain gets to be too much to handle! I don't care what you say. That reminds me, how're the dials?"

"Huh?" Jim gave him a blank look. ~Doesn't this kid ever stop talking?~

"The pain dials? Are you ok? No problems?"

"I'm fine." Sandburg nodded. They spent the rest of the drive in silence.

After a short car ride, they arrived at 852 Prospect Avenue. "Here we are man, home sweet home."

Jim barely acknowedged him, tired from the strain of the day and sore. Sandburg helped Jim up to the loft and to his room where Jim collapsed and fell into a deep sleep.

/Jim found himself walking in an open area in front of a building. ~I know this place.~ He was suddenly struck with the feeling that something was terribly terribly wrong. He shivered as the hairs in the back of his neck stood on end, he knew he was here to see something that would change his life forever.

He searched the area with his senses. His vision was pulled to a fountain. His ears caught the sound of water running down the sides, hitting thepool. It was almost as though he could hear each drop as they fell. He zoomed in on the fountain.

The he saw it; a figure floating face down in the water. He was assaulted as memory and dream collided to form a very real recollection.

~"Oh, my God." He ran to the fountain, suddenly noticing he was surrounded by Simon, Megan, Brown, and Rafe. "Sandburg! Sandburg! Come on. Come on, guys. Come on. Sandburg! Let's get an ambulance here!" They pulled his body from the water.

"I don't hear a heartbeat. Do you? Do you hear a heartbeat? Jim! Jim!"

"No, nothing." He looked at Blair's still body in horror.

"Come on. Get his airway open. All right, here we go."

"Come on, Chief. Breathe, damn it! This can't be happening. This can't be happening. This can't be happening. Come on, Sandburg." He and Simon worked on Blair, breathing for him, pumping his heart for him, hoping he would begin to do it himself. "Come on. Come on, Chief." The EMT's finally arrived and pushed him away, working on Blair. "Come on. Come on, come on."

"I'm sorry, guys."

"What do you mean, 'sorry'? Wait. This isn't over. Come on, Sandburg." Unable to believe his eyes, Jim rushed back to Blair's form and began CPR again. "Come on! Come on, come on. Come on, Sandburg. Come on, damn it! "

"Jim, he's gone. Let him go. He's gone."

"Come on, Sandburg."

"Jim!" Simon reached to pull him away.

"No! No! He's alive!" He struggled futiley to reach his guide.

"He's gone!"

"No! No . . . oh, god, no."/~

"Jim! Wake up man! C'mon, wake up!" Jim moaned again and Blair tried to wake him up. "You're dreaming Jim, wake up now. Your safe!"

Blair had been sleeping peacfully when a loud moan woke him up. He had made his way upstairs to Jim's room to find Jim having a nightmare.

"Come on . . . " Jim muttered. Blair heard him whisper more words. "No, Sandburg. No . . . oh, god, no." Blair grew scared at this defeated whisper and shivered at the familiar words.

"Jim! Wake up man! I'm here, I'm still here. JIM!" The last word was yelled as he realized the older man had actually stopped breathing.

Jim shot up in bed, breathing heavily. He extended his hearing, searching for that familiar comforting beat. He found it next to him. Turning slightly, he found the figure of his guide crouching on his bed. He stared at the figure, looking into the blue eyes that had nearly been closed forever, watching the rise and fall of his breast, listening to the beating of the nearly extiguished life. He let out a strangled breath and let the soothing beat relax him.

"What happened?" The voice was low, calming, soothing. Jim shuddered and realized he remembered another awful memory. ~God, why is the kid still here? He nearly died being near me! And yet he's still here? What else has this kid been through?~

"How did you die?"

It was a simple question really. Four little words that seemed harmless enough but held such incredible impact. Blair started to hyperventilate. "Oh god, you dreamed that . . . no wonder you had a nightmare."

The sight of Blair losing his cool was just too much for the Sentinel to bear. He reached for his guide and pulled him into his embrace. Jim worked to hold back the tears that threatened to fall.

~He DIED for me! He actually died for me and he's still here. Why do I care so much for him? Obviously he's important to me but how important? I don't understand how this kid, no, this man can invoke such strong emotions.~

Jim wrapped his arms tighter, protecting Blair

Jim watched as Blair collected himself. He could hear that heartbeat increase in tempo, his own following. Blair showed a calm exterior and began the story of Alex Barnes.

Monday came and Jim and Sandburg headed to Cascade PD. Blair hoped that if Jim was surrounded by familiar stimuli, he would remember more.

Sandburg turned into the precinct garage and parked. Jim slowly exited the car, still slightly sore from the gunshot wound. His arm was in a sling to help hasten the healing. The duo began to walk towards the elevator.

Noticing his discomfort, Sandburg turned to him and asked, "Arm still hurting? How high do you have the pain dials?"

Jim reluctantly answered. He was still uncomfortable with the idea that he had heightened senses and that this kid was his backup. He nodded in an affirmative to the first question. "I've got the dial down to two." Sandburg nodded.

"That's good." Sandburg, sensing his Sentinel's discomfort, turned and began to walk.

Jim followed and gritted his teeth as each step he took caused a small jab of pain to shoot through his arm. He tried to ignore it and looked around his surroundings to see if anything rang a bell. Suddenly his vision went hazy and took on a yellowish/goldish hue. He was suddenly hit with a flashback:

~"He keeps yelling about demons. He dusted or what?"

"He's been dosed with Golden."

"Take cover! Get down! Get down!"

"He's got your gun."

"He fires again, this whole garage could go."

"What's going on?"

"You don't see them? They're coming through, through the walls and the floor, man."

"Who are?"

"The Golden fire people. You don't see them, man? They're made out of fire and they're burnt. You think they're ashes, but they're alive, man. And we gotta send them back!"~

Jim stumbled and Sandburg turned back to look at him. He dimly heard Sandburg's voice as he spiraled farther into the memory of sound.

"Jim!"

~"Blair! Easy, buddy! Easy, buddy! Whoa! Blair, listen to me! Your gun isn't gonna work with the fire people. You've gotta use the bat echo trick. You know, the one you taught me. Uh, you close your eyes, and you clap your hands."

"No, man, that is not gonna work here!"

"Blair, come on. Try it. Trust me. You can save the world here. Come on."

"I just don't think that's gonna work here."

"Trust me. That's right. You gotta clap your hands. You gotta clap your hands. "

"I'm sorry."

"That's okay."

"We need a medic over here now! "

"Hang in there. It's all right."~

"Jim! Come back to me man, c'mon! Ji-im, you're scaring me!"

"Blair?" He asked weakly, unsure of where he was. He shook his head to clear his vision of the golden haze and recalled what he had just remembered. He shuddered.

"Hey Jim, what happened?"

"I remember something."

"That's great man! What was it?" Jim looked into excited blue eyes and wondered just what Sandburg had gone through since being his partner.

"What's Golden Chief?" Those expressive blue eyes momentarily filled with fear then Sandburg caught himself and calmed down.

"What is it?" he asked again.

Blair took a deep breath. "About two years ago, a designer drug called Golden came out onto the market. We were assigned to the case. You had accidentally gotten a small amount in your eyes, causing you to only see a golden glow. We compensated using your remaining 4 senses. We began to close in on the manufacturers when they decided to slow us down. They sent in pizzas to the Major Crimes unit, all laced with golden. I," Blair's voice faltered slightly and his heart rate sped up slightly. "I was the only one to eat one piece of pizza. Under the drug's influence I came down to this garage and with a gun, began shooting. I thought golden fire people were after me. The other cops were afraid I'd hit one of the gas pumps and blow up the building. You came down here and . . . and you convinced me to come down. I lost consciousness and fell into a coma while I fought the drug." Blair stopped talking and looked away.

"I remember. We used, what was it? A bat echo trick. It worked pretty well too." Jim looked at Sandburg's ashamed face and immediately regretted bringing up the subject of Golden. "I'm sorry Chief, I didn't mean to bring up such bad memories."

"Hey, it's no. . . did you just call me Chief?"

"Yeah, I guess I did, why?"

"You remembered something else! That's the nickname you gave me when we first met! This is great man! I knew bringing you to familiar places would jog your memory!" That slight bounce was back and Jim was strangely glad to see it.

Jim quickly gathered himself and nodded to Blair that he was ready to go on. They made their way to the elevators and up to Major Crimes.

Jim took a deep, quiet breath as they rode the elevator up to MC. The doors opened and they stepped out and into the bustling hallway leading to the Major Crimes Bullpen. Jim felt a small irrational twinge of fear. He brushed it off and followed Sandburg.

"Here we are Jim," Sandburg announced as they walked through the doors. The bullpen buzzed with barely repressed energy. Jim stopped at the doors and looked around.

"Hairboy! Long time no see!"

"Hey H, Rafe." The 2 men nodded their greetings. "What's up?"

"Nothing much. Just working on the Franelli case," Rafe responded. "Hey Jim, how are you?"

"I've been better. I still don't remember much. Just bits and pieces." He jumped slightly as a loud crash came from the Captain's office. It was barely audible to the 3 men.

"Dial it down Jim." Blair whispered. Jim looked at Blair, surprised then at the 2 men just watching with slight curiousity. Jim felt his face heat up at the unaccustomed attention and turned away.

"So Chief, wanna go check how Simon is?"

Blair glanced at the 2 men then spoke to Jim. "Sure Jim." He said a quiet goodbye and followed his partner.

"Hey Sandy." A tall redhead came over to him. "Jim, glad to see you're feeling better!" she exclaimed in her smooth australian lilt.

He smiled and tried to remember her. Nothing came to him. Blair saw his slight distress and came to his rescue.

"Megan! Good to see you, how's everything?"

"Ellison! Sandburg! My office!" came the familiar bellow. Jim looked to his captain and to the pretty detective. He could feel something in the back of his mind, a memory trying to fight it's way to the front. He relaxed, taking deep breaths and waited.

Like a bolt of lightening, the memory zapped through him and he remembered. Remembered Zeller, remembered that fateful day. With a small cry, he clutched at his head as the pain of the memory made itself known. His knees gave out and he sank to the floor.

"JIM!"

~Everything seemed to move in slow motion as he felt and witnessed the nightemarish scene. He felt the disturbance of air as the deadly bullet flew over his back. He heard the sickening crunch as the bullet popped through Simon's upper torso, crashed it's way through the glass, passed through Megan's shoulder and embedded itself in the wood near his guide's head. He watched as the blood poured from the wound, as man and woman fell to the ground in shock and pain.

"Captain! Medic! Medic! Just keep breathing. Come on. Relax."

He put pressure on the hole in Simon's chest and tried to stop the bleeding. He looked up as Joel Taggart rushed in.

"Oh, my god."

"Everybody, calm. Just relax."

He barely paid attention as he heard his guide exclaim and Megan asnwer back: "Get a doctor, quick!"

"Sandy . . ."

Jim called out to his superior, trying to keep him conscious. "Squeeze my hand, come on."~

Jim was slammed back into reality by the persistant call of his guide. The different pieces of his life started to come together faster and faster as he remembered.

**Flash**

~"Listen, you neo-hippy witch doctor punk, I could slap you right now with larceny and false impersonation and you are heading real quick into harassing a police officer, and what's more your behavior is giving me probable cause to shake this place down from top to bottom for narcotics."

"Hey, Joe Friday, relax, okay? Look, you mess with me, man, and you are never gonna figure out what's up with you. Now I know about your time spent in Peru and it has got to be connected to what is happening to you now. Now, let me just show you something here. This is a monograph by Sir Richard Burton, the explorer, not the actor. It's over a hundred years old. Anyway, the idea goes something like this -- in all tribal cultures every village had what Burton named a Sentinel."

**Flash**

"It's down."

"What, a feather?"

"Down? Carolyn, give me that water in the beaker. Just get it."

"Where you going with this, Jim?"

"And break the seal."

"I can't, Jim. Oxygen will contaminate the sample. It'll be useless as evidence."

"Sandburg's life is at stake."

**Flash**

"Well, the point is you two are going to help me steal something."

"Wait a minute, both of us?"

"Well, you're his guide, so to speak, so I'll need you too."

**Flash**

"You've got the attention span of a gerbil."

**Flash**

"Okay. Now, picture something that you can control . . . .picture a dial."

**Flash**

"What do you fear?"

"I fear . . . being a sentinel."

"What do you fear?"

"I fear responsibility."

"Sentinel or not, your responsibility is to be accountable for your actions and to learn from your mistakes just like any man."

"And my senses?"

"Reject them and the responsibility remains. Accept them and you accept the gift."~

**Flash**

He slowly opened his eyes to the bright lights of the Major Crimes unit. Looking around, he saw the familiar faces of his friends standing worriedly over him. He looked around and recognized their faces. He slowly got to his knees and stood up, wobbling slightly as the world spun.

"Jim?"

He turned to face his guide, the man he had forgotten. ~How could I have forgotten my friends?~

"Jim man, could you say something? You're uh, really starting to scare me."

Jim gazed into the faces of the men and women he called his friends. He saw the confusion but mostly saw the concern for him. He looked each one in the eye, then looked at his partner, his friend, his guide.

"I remember."

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