EPISODE SIX – If You Don’t Know Me By Now ("If You Don’t Know Me", Simply Red)

Zac was standing at the mirror in the bathroom combing his hair, Taylor was standing at the door watching him.

"So where are you going tonight?" Taylor asked of Zac, noticing Zac looked a little smarter than usual.

"Graham invited me to a party at his friend, Brian’s," Zac answered. Graham was their slightly older cousin, him and Zac had an on and off friendship, sometimes there’d be times Zac and Graham were always together, and then Zac was on his own for weeks without any friends. Zac tilted his head to the side to comb his hair underneath, "I dunno, maybe I’ll be lucky and pick up a chick," He shrugged.

"Zac, I thought you weren’t into that sorta thing," Taylor smirked, he leaned against the threshold.

"Well, like, I can’t stay single forever, I’m getting sick of it, its boring."

"Oh, so you’re in the mood for a good horngasm," Taylor joked, and gave a thrust of his pelvis bringing his arms in at the same time for an emphasis on the word.

Zac rolled his eyes, "You’re such a pervert," he muttered, he smirked though, "nah, I don’t wanna get into that kind of relationship just yet," he laughed softly. "I wanna beat you to it," he then paused, grinning mischievously.

"Beat me to what?" Taylor asked curiously.

"Having the first kiss. I wanna have my first kiss before my big brother does," Zac smirked.

Taylor’s heart stung, somehow that really did hurt, he felt so stupid, being fifteen and never even having kissed a girl, and how would it look if Zac had his first kiss before Taylor had his?

It wouldn’t look very good, that’s how it would look, Taylor thought drearily.

"What’s wrong?" Zac asked, noticing the trace of sadness in Taylor’s eyes as he looked into space.

"Nothing," Taylor shook it away, he looked at Zac, "I hope you have a good time tonight," he said, "Hope you find someone…" he added.

"What good is finding someone when you already want what you can’t have?" Zac slipped, then his eyes bulged, "I gotta go…come get me at eleven, the address is on the Lego Table," he explained and made a quick exit. Taylor stood, wondering why Zachary had made such a comment then suddenly left like that. Maybe it was obvious, Zac had feelings for someone and couldn’t find a way to even admit to it.

Taylor sighed, maybe he had the same problem, he had been pretty angry with the carry on between Lauren with Jon, and the moment he’d seen them together making out on the street he’d felt so enraged he just wanted to get them to stop. Am I just fooling myself? Is my anger with Jon just because I want Lauren?

Taylor shook the thought off, no, he couldn’t chance the thought of it, he couldn’t have a girlfriend, his life was so screwed up and he didn’t want to pass it on to any girl. He did want love though, but didn’t want to risk it. He didn’t need hurt and pain right now. And besides, if he did want any girl, he realised it would be Lauren, he was beginning to feel so much for her. He thought this pretty strange considering he had only hated her just a couple of weeks ago, and now, he couldn’t get enough of her. He realised that this could just be out of desperation for what he knew deep inside – and what Zac had unintentionally implied. He was terminally single, and he had to do something about that.

I can’t think that this Lauren thing is just that. I can’t just label myself terminally single, I am not terminally single, girls want me…

Taylor walked into the bathroom and looked at himself in the mirror that Zac had been staring into moments ago. "Girls want me," he told himself, sternly, looking at his skinny ill looking frame in the mirror, and he felt his eyes glaze over, as if he was looking at a total stranger. "Girls want me," he repeated a final time, and turned away from his reflection. "I just don’t want them."

Isaac was standing at the threshold, "talking to yourself again?" he asked, smirking.

"No…I…"
"Tay, you have got to get a life or something," Isaac sighed, shaking his head.

"Same to you, you’ve been moping just ‘cause the girl you like rejects you," Taylor rolled his eyes, leaving the bathroom and heading towards his bedroom, Isaac followed him.

"Hey, at least I like a girl," Isaac shot.

Taylor spun around, "What the hell is that supposed to mean?!"

Isaac glared at Taylor, "it means at least I like girls!"

Taylor stood there gaping, couldn’t believe he was being accused of this again.

"See you don’t even admit you like girls!"

Taylor stared, "I’m not admitting anything!"

"Well you’re not denying it either!" Isaac pointed out.

"I am not gay!"
"Yes you are."

Taylor looked to the floor, couldn’t understand why people were making this assumption.

"You are!" Isaac laughed, "are you going to see your hairdresser, Antonio?" he joked with a lisp.

Taylor didn’t know what the hell snapped in him, but he lashed out at Isaac, punching him in the face, Isaac staggered and put his hand to his cheek.

"What the fuck was that for?!" Isaac demanded in pain.

"For making that kind of assumption, you should know me better by now!" Taylor yelled.

Isaac suddenly looked so hurt, "Well I don't know you anymore!! You're always depressed, never happy anymore!! What happened to the old Tay who loved to have fun and water bomb people?!" he demanded.

Taylor glared at Isaac, "Grow up, Ike. I did," he muttered, grabbed a slip of paper from the Lego Table and left, Isaac standing speechless and alone.