402. A panoply of spheres has Reg pinned to the wall. Tall Man lets him go.----------------------0

403. A school of computerized spheres fly through the hallway, never to be seen------------------0
in the movie again.

404. Mike has a never-seen-before flashback of him hijacking an ice cream truck-----------------0
and stealing a popsicle. Reggie smiles and considers selling ice cream in a safer
neighborhood.

405. Mike and Jody riding in the Cuda while being pursued by a dog, which gets------------------0
run over by the Tall Man in a hearse. (Then animal rights activists run over the
Tall Man with a monster pick-up truck to avenge the dog. Just kidding…)

406. Mike sees a sphere fly in front of the hearse windshield and then an 18-wheeler--------------0
coming straight at him! After swerving to avoid becoming a scene for a traffic school
video, Mike sees the fortuneteller from Phantasm I in the passenger seat. Living proof
you should never take LSD and drive at the same time.

407. Reg changes the tire on the Cuda. Jody makes a surprise visit. Reggie tells Jody------------0
to get lost but Jody keeps asking him to protect Mike. Reg refuses and just bitches
about car maintenance.

408. Mike chauffeurs Ms. Daisy, er, the Tall Man. No matter how Mike drives the----------------0
hearse, the Tall Man insists on acting as a “passenger-driver.” Then the Tall Man
insults Mike by telling him that he has no friends before slipping back into the
coffin. Jeez, some people can be SO obnoxious!

409. A cop pulls over Reggie but gets stalked by a zombie!---------------------------------------------0

410. Reggie vs. Zombie. Round One. Reggie checks out the police car and finds the--------------1
cop locked up in the trunk! The zombie creeps behind Reg. Turn around, Reg!
Reg locks himself in the car and tries to take the shotgun. Zombie pulls Reg from
out of the window, but Reg breaks free by shooting the zombie with the shotgun!
Zombie regurgitates tainted tapioca pudding down Reggie’s throat…I give this
round to the zombie, though the judges around here might disagree.

411. Round Two. Reg picks up the nightstick and whacks the zombie in the head.-----------------1
Zombie no-sells that move, presses Reg onto the asphalt, and slams the police
car door against Reggie’s head. Reg no-sells and kicks the zombie in the car.
Reg crams the PR-45 (nightstick) in the zombie’s chest. It looks like Reggie has
the momentum on his side. What’s this? Reggie is going to finish off the zombie
by blowing up the police car! The zombie is on fire but tries to walk it off!
Will he be able to continue? No. Your winner: Reggie in the 2nd round.

412. The hearse overheats in the desert. Mike could have sworn that he saw a----------------------0
Hooded munchkin (dwarf) scurrying through the rock formation.

413. Sun sets. How lovely. Mike drags out the coffin and opens it.----------------------------------0
That Tall Cheapskate didn’t even leave a tip, but he did forget his landry.
Ha! See if I return this suit to you, you cheap bastard! Mike scribbles
in the Last Will & Testament while some other Lollipop Guild members
(dwarves) watch.

414. Mike has a Phantasm III flashback with the Tall Man planting a sphere------------------------0
inside his head.

415. Mike has a dream about the Civil War (uh-huh) and then getting his nose---------------------0
picked by the Tall Man!

416. Before we ever get to see a big bloody booger, Mike wakes up and sees-----------------------0
a dimensional fork in the clearing.

417. Reg is in some desolated rest place and sees Jennifer hanging up the phone.------------------0
He gets inside the Cuda and watches her slip into her gold Mustang. Looks like
it’s stalking time for Reggie!

418. Mike tries to hang himself. What a swinging guy!-------------------------------------------------0

419. Young Mike lures the Tall Man into a noose. The Tall Man is literally-------------------------0
left hung out to dry while Mike and Jody speed off in the Cuda.

420. Young Mike wakes up and checks to see if the Tall Man is dead yet.----------------------------1
Nope. Tall Man orders Mike to cut him down. Mike refuses, but the Tall Man
promises that he will go away. Mike cuts him down, but the Tall Man has
politician blood running through his veins and naturally breaks his promise...
STUPID!! YOU’RE SO STUPID!!!

421. Back to the present. The rope around Mike’s neck snaps. The Tall Man says-----------------0
He won’t let Mike kill himself. Why? Because he LOVES him! Mike summons
a portal (dimensional fork) and goes through it.

422. Mike finds himself in a room half-full of machinery.-----------------------------------------------0
Yep, it’s just your everyday laboratory for time travel experiments.

423. Mike wanders outside and meets Jebediah Obediah Zachariah Morningside.-------------------1
Jeb offers Mike some lemonade (Fool-Aid?) and inquires about the dimensional
fork. Fortuneteller on the porch interrupts him, and Mike runs back in the house
to warp back into the desert, only to find a plethera of portals this time.

424. Reggie catches up to Jennifer, who swerves to avoid crushing a passing tortoise---------------0
Jennifer’s car takes a real nasty spill, but she somehow more than miraculously
escapes injury. Reg kicks in the window to pull her out. Better than amputation,
I suppose. Jennifer says she thought cars only blew up in movies (okay, only in
movies would a car accident victim say something like that). Since this is a movie,
the car explodes predictably enough.

425. Mike sees a scorpion and telekinetically sends a rock to squash it.--------------------------------0
He pulls a hat trick by doing the same thing on a dwarf. Mike must watch
“Lord of the Flies” regularly.

426. While Mike looks under the hood, Jody pays a visit and reveals----------------------------------0
That he was taken away by the Tall Man. Some previously unreleased footage
Of Jody going through the closet and seeing the Tall Man in the mirror.
That’s a relief. Good thing Jody didn’t decide to wear one of his mom’s dresses…

427. Mike sees even more dimensional forks and makes his own sphere out of car parts.----------0

428. Reggie takes Jennifer to a deserted hotel and breaks into a vacant room.------------------------0
Reg takes some moldy pizza and calls it 24-hour room service. He points to a
smashed-up TV set and says it gets 49 satellite stations. Just dial 3 on the broken
telephone for the health spa, or 1-900-HUMP-JEN for some ear candy.

429. Mike sits at a campfire while his makeshift sphere stirs under the hood.-------------------------0

430. While Jennifer undresses behind a translucent shower curtain (which should-------------------1
have been torn up like everything else in the room), Reggie explains the Tall Man’s
plans for world domination. Jennifer doesn’t buy it and says she won’t do anyone
more messed up than she is. Reggie is sexually frustrated and will probably have
to “jossle his juniper,” “grope his giraffe,” or “flog his ferret” to get Uncle Meatus
to settle back down.

431. Reg dreams of waking up in a graveyard. He hears a child laughing-----------------------------0
and decides to investigate. Mike, trying out the Lurch look, grabs Reggie from behind!

432. Reg wakes up yelling “BOY!” He takes a good look at Jennifer----------------------------------2
And notices her big breastesses are alive with pleasure. Reg, the sex fiend,
unbuttons her shirt to find out that she had implants…not saline…not silicone…
They’re steel! No wonder they looked firm! Implants fly around the room until
Reg swings his hammer and smashes one. The other implant avenges its
counterpart by drilling a hole in Reggie’s hand. Reggie strikes a tuning fork,
which causes the remaining sphere to explode. Uh-huh. I think I’ll blow up
a safe with a tuning fork now…Jennifer wants more so Reg pounds her with his hammer.

433. Mike goes through a dimensional fork and winds up in a deserted city.--------------------------0
The Tall Man loudly jaywalks down the street. Jody snatches Mike and says
that there’s a risk of infection. The Tall Man doesn’t seem to mind.

434. Reggie finds the hearse and goes back to the Cuda. He arms himself----------------------------0
to the teeth and dons his Col. Saunders outfit. Boy, those graveyard shifts
at KFC can be pretty rough!

435. Mike and Jody standing on the beach.-----------------------------------------------------------------0

436. Reg hears the makeshift sphere in the hearse and checks it out.-----------------------------------0
Reggie mills around behind the hearse, smells a dwarf and blasts it before
it has the chance to jump on him. The dwarf brought its gang along, and they
stampede toward Reggie. Meanwhile, Mike and Jody are still hanging out at
the beach.

437. A dwarf surprises Reg at the driver’s window. Reg blasts it. While he reloads,----------------0
another dwarf goes airborne and lands right on Reggie! Reg no-sells and stabs it
behind-the-back style. The dwarf runs away bleeding everywhere. A third dwarf
pounces on Reggie but quickly becomes another statistic when Reg shoots it in the
face with a pistol. Mike and Jody return. Mike tells Reg not to trust Jody. Reg hands
Mike a tuning fork. Mike goes back to Jody and asks him to take him back to the
Beginning (What do I look like to you, Mike? A Thomas Guide or something?)

438. Jebediah Morningside sits at his desk fiddling with metal bars to learn the----------------------0
secrets of interdimensional travel. Mike finds a picture of the Tall Man riding
a stagecoach. Jebediah turns on the machine and heads for the dimensional fork…
Mike tries to abort the operation but fails because he’s not in the right dimension…
Jeb comes back as the evil Quaker Oats Man and apparently got stoned from drinking
bong water or something.

439. Mike warps into a graveyard. Jody finds him again and tries to cut Mike-----------------------0
with a sphere. Mike stabs Jody in the chest first. However, Jody no-sells and
drags Mike through a dimensional fork.

440. Mike suddenly finds himself being pinned down on a table in the mausoleum.-----------------0
While fratricidal maniac Jody holds Mike in place, the Tall Man tries to cut Mike’s
head open with a sphere. Mike uses the tuning fork. Unfortunately, the Tall Demigod
does not explode, though he is stunned long enough for Mike to break free and kill
Jody. Before Jody dies, he says that he died in a car wreck after all (at this point, so what?)

441. Mike returns to Reggie and tells him that the Tall Man intends to remove the sphere-----------1
inside his head. The Tall Man shows up. Reggie tries to hold him at bay, but the Tall
Man just manhandles him! Mike implores his makeshift sphere to sic the Tall Man,
who isn’t even fazed by it. Mike makes the hearse explode when the Tall Man
approaches it. That slows him down a little but not enough to prevent him from removing
the sphere in Mike’s head. The Tall Man leaves with the newly-extracted sphere.
Mike says he’s dying. Reg runs for the dimensional fork and does the “TIME WARP.”

442. More previously unreleased footage. Young Mike walks on a deserted street.-------------------0
Reggie picks him up in his ice cream truck Now about that popsicle you stole earlier,
young man...Reg thinks he hears something, but Mike says “It’s just the wind.”
Looks like someone cut the cheese…Uh, wait a minute…The movie’s over?!!