ARCHIVES
Welcome to my archives page! This is where I deposit my reviews when I need more space on my other pages. So check them out! As a side note, please do not send me your ratings on these films, I will not update them. Thanks!
THE MESSENGER - The Story of Joan of Arc
When I saw this DVD used, in a store close by, I snatched it up. I heard it was a good movie. After watching I knew I had paid to much. This film is directed by Luc Besson (The Fifth Element, La Femme Nikita, The Professional) and stars Milla Jovovich, John Malkovich, and Faye Dunaway. The film chronicles the life of Joan of Arc starting with her as a child. They show her impressing the to be king of France and leading an army to victory over the invading English. I saw this movie before, when it was on television in a two part mini series. This film didn't impress me. The acting was standard, no break out performances by any of the cast. Milla didn't draw me into her character even though she did an okay job of acting this part. Some of it felt forced though. The rest of the cast was just cut out of sterotypical molds for the most part. The fight scenes were somewhat impressive and gory in some instances but nothing to write home about. This film is just a rental. (Go see any of Besson's other films before this one). [Available on video and DVD]
5 out of 10
DVD feature review
This DVD contains the "extended international version" of the film. (I don't know what that is. It is the widescreen version of the film. It also contains a HBO special on the film, some theatrical trailers, and talent files. In addition there are some theatrical trailers for the Messenger and other films, including the Professional.
5 out of 10 for DVD features
STIGMATA
Patricia Arquette is a hairdresser plagued by stigmata (wounds of christ). Gabriel Byrne is a Catholic investigator sent to check her out. It has an interesting theme but it doesn't give the viewer anything special. No spectacular acting, directing, or script. If you are in a mood for a religiously themed movie and just want to kill time you might consider checking this one out. [Available on video and DVD]
5 out of 10
GUN SHY
Starring Liam Nieson as a burned out undercover DEA agent being sent on one more job. Sandra Bulluck plays a nurse who helps him out and is Nieson's romantic interest in the film. It was interesting, and a little funny, to see an undercover cop go into therapy and tell a therapy group what that he was an undercover cop. That is where most of the humor and the interest ends though. After that point I can only describe this film as bland. The scenes, the script, the acting on the most part were bland. I didn't get excited during the film, I didn't worry about the characters, I hardly laughed. To top it off, the end was corny. Spend your time and money on something else. [Playing in local theatres]
4 out of 10
THE NINTH GATE
I got a chace to see this film for free with a preview pass and I still wasn't happy. This one stars Johny Depp as an unscrupulous book dealer hired by an equally unscrupulous book collector to examine several copies of the book of the nine gates of shadows. As soon as he takes on this job bad things start to happen and people start getting dead. The film is less than two hours but after a while it drags. The ending is horrible and the film never really explains itself. I will admit I was interested for a while but the end really destroyed it for me. Depp does a okay job playing a dealer that cares only about himself. For a better mystery see Depp in Sleepy Hollow. Avoid this one. [Playing in local theatres]
3 out of 10
1 visitor rating; average of 1
RAZOR BLADE SMILE
A film based on Japanese manga of the same name. It stars, I believe english, actors I have never heard of. It got me excited with a cool CGI opening sequence but disappointed after that. This is a horror/action film with lots of poeple getting killed by vampires. (Please note that my review may be tainted because I am not really a horror film fan). The film doesn't get too much into the gore but they use alot of blood. The acting wasn't spectacular and the action was not too exciting. I was interested enough to finish watching the film so that at least says something of the movie. A story twist at the end gave it a little umph but it wasn't enough to save this one. [On video and DVD]
4 out of 10
THE LIMEY
This film stars Terrance Stamp as Wilson. Wilson is a criminal from Britain who comes to the U.S. to investigate his daughters death. He meets up with his daughter's friend and, through him, locates those responsible for his daughter's death, and takes them out. I really did not like this movie. In fact I hated it. As it went on and on I was begging my VCR to eat the tape. From dull dialouge and characters to dull action. One of the most annoying aspects of this film was the cuts and sound editing. I am sure it was for some sort of dramatic influence but it got on my nerves bad. If you want to see a movie about revenge there are others better than this. [Available on DVD and video]
2 out of 10
REINDEER GAMES
I WANT MY MONEY BACK! I should have known to avoid this movie when my friend said something to the effect of "Ben Affleck as an action movie star, yeah right". Reindeer games stars good ol' Ben as a just released convict who gets involved with his dead cell mates pen pal played by Charlize Theron. Soon after he is accosted by a group of thugs lead by Gary Sinise who want Affleck to help them rob a casino because they think he is someone else. That gives me a sequie into one of the many aspects of this film I disliked; the tired mistaken identity gag. Well written scripts can sometimes pull this off and make it a good part of the story. The script wasn't written well. You complete the logic. Next, the film spends 35 minutes building up to the first contact with the bad guys and some action from this "action movie". Even when it got to the "action" there was hardly any to be had. You can make up for low levels of action in an action movie with some tension. No believable tension in this film. Also, the story twists are not suprising and even get corny in the end. Finally, the characters are card board cut outs. I know Sinise can do better and Affleck should just stick to dramas. I actually thought of getting up in the middle of this film and walking out. The best part of this film was the preview for Mission Impossible 2. Stay away, far away. [Out of theatres, thankfully!]
2 out of 10
THE WHOLE NINE YARDS
Bruce Willis (see caveats) stars with Matthew Perry in this new comedy. Willis stars as an "ex" hitman who moves in next to Perry playing a dentist living a miserable life. This was the comedy Gun Shy wishes it could be. Perry was great in his role combining slapstick gags with standard one liners with equal ease. Willis played his role more serious and was not as animated as Perry but it fit the hit man role. There is generally more Perry screen time than Willis screen time but because Perry is the primary comedy relief it makes more sense. Perry's comedy bounces off Willis stoic character. I laughed alot during this film. Check this one out. [On video and DVD]
8 out of 10
MYSTERY MEN
An interesting film with a good effort but it falls short. This film stars Ben Stiller, Jeanene Garofalo, Paul Ruebens, Hank Azaria, and others as a rag tag group of dysfunctional superhereos. They are trying to make a name for themselves in Champion City where crime has been all but wiped out by Captain Amazing. This film was billed as a comedy but I laughed maybe 5 times during the movie. Many of the jokes were in the preview. It has colorful sets and costumes but the impact of those didn't last long. I never felt drawn into the characters or even their cause. I'm glad I waited for rental. [Available on video and DVD]
5 out of 10
DVD review - Mystery Men
The DVD version of this film contains the widescreen version of the film, a behind the scenes short, deleted scenes, director commentary, a sound track presentation and music highlights. The "soundtrack presentation" is a music video followed by a list of the music on the soundtrack. The "music highlights" are jumps to the parts in the film where music was played in the background.
Why buy or rent a DVD if you can't get widescreen? This is almost an essential feature for me. Additionally this DVD gets points for commentary, behind the scenes material, and deleted scenes. Due to time constraints I was unable to view the feature length commentary (plus I didn't want to watch the movie again) or look at any of the deleted scenes. I did get to see some of the behind the scenes short and it was what you would expect.
8 out of 10 for DVD features