I think if you gave me an opportunity to describe my feelings....well, let me give you a mental picture, albeit a brief one. Its like almost every conscious moment that I can think is spent in a silent scream....you know like that horrow movie you watched, only that when the victim opens his/her mouth to scream, no words come out. But.....look closely....listen. No sound is needed. The silent keening is loud enough to deafen deaf ears. How do I feel? Absolute!

Wow....now that's word just came out of nowhere. Have you ever heard of anyone that felt "absolute"? Maybe I meant to say the feelings feel absolute. But that would imply that the feelings are conscious in themselves. Are they not? Or was it just word's play?

Ok....I'm waiting for the big bounce.....you know....the big one. The really big bounce. I've already gone down, and people/spirit/entity (and whatever other names they go by) will have to drag with God to stop my rise; because when I do, I promise, it will be like vengeance. There will be no quarter, no consideration given, my eyes will be open wide shut....because of what I have suffered? YES! Some might have borne greater burdens, but they must be greater men because God only gives you what you can bear right? Good! We've established something!

Yeah....you must have figured it out, I'm an extreme sort of dude. Ah well....God dey!

One Lamp,

Geenie