Quotes: RAW August 23, 1999
"Mick, you screwed me last night! Well, paybacks are a bitch, pal!"
-- Triple H
"Well, all I can say is this--"
"Oh, you didn't know?"
-- Lawler being rudely interrupted by Road Dogg's entrance music
"I get beat up a lot."
-- X-Pac
"We just witnessed a dognapping!"
-- Lawler on Bossman and Pepper
"Of course, you've got to put him next to me, King."
"Stop moving this way!"
-- Cole and Lawler, neither of whom want to sit next to Kane
"How about a few words from Kane?"
"You're pretty funny, Jerry."
"Thanks!"
-- Lawler and X-Pac
"Hey Michael, how about asking chatterbox a question over there?"
-- Lawler egging Cole on to make Kane talk
"Socko!"
"I'm gonna take that sock, turn it sideways, spit on it, and stick it straight up his candy ass!"
"You should know Rock; you've had it in you before."
"Well, so has the Rock's boot been in you so shut your mouth."
-- Michael Cole and the Rock
"Thanks but no thanks, missy."
-- Road Dogg to the chick ring announcer Lilian Garcia
"Guys, you're certainly welcome here any time!"
"You running for something, Lawler?"
"Well, I was running for the corner a minute ago..."
-- Lawler and Paul Bearer
"How does X-Pac continue to do it?"
"What do you mean, continue to do it? He lays there very well; it's easy to lay there like that. He looks like a slug; that's his best natural defense."
-- Cole and Lawler on a downed X-Pac
"There comes a time in every man's life when he has to ask certain questions... and sometimes, he's gotta pop them."
-- Test
"They both like it doggystyle, I can assure you of that!"
-- Lawler on the similarities between the Road Dogg and Pepper
"The following contest is scheduled for one round... one fall."
-- The WWF's superb chick ring announcer
"If you see her, tell her I'm looking for her."
"Well, I wouldn't look too hard-- you might find her."
-- BA Billy Gunn and Triple H on Chyna
"He may be my flesh and blood, but he doesn't have what I have inside. He's soft! He doesn't have a killer's instinct; he wants friends. He needs somebody to be by his side. That's why he was always weak. That's why he's scarred."
-- The Undertaker on Kane
"I'd like to play in her kitty litter!"
-- Lawler getting disgusting during the introduction of "Miss Kitty"
"Oh, you didn't know? Finkel, your ass better call somebody!"
-- Road Dogg, slightly adjusting his entrance music to meet Finkel in the ring
"I got a feeling Michael Cole got a lot of mousse in my hair and look at my slender-- never mind."
-- Paul Bearer on a *funky* tangent
"You've never played Magic, have you?"
"No."
"Heh-- that's 'cause it's a game of wits!"
-- Lawler ribbing on Cole
"Triple H, you break his arm, then dammit, I'm gonna break my promise! You're NOT getting a title shot!"
-- Mankind
"It's a Gothic lifestyle; you wouldn't understand."
"And you would?"
"Well, I've read about it."
-- Lawler and Cole
"Howard... you've been dipping into my backsack again, haven't you?"
-- Road Dogg to Finkel
"What is he TALKING about? The Fink's out of breath just cutting a promo!"
-- Lawler on Howard Finkel's challenge to the Road Dogg
"You can dish it out, Triple H. Tonight we're going to see how well you take it."
-- Mankind
"Chris Jericho... he's coming to save the--"
"He's already here!"
-- Lawler and Cole on Jericho's surprise appearance in the ring
"Eyeball me again, boy!"
-- The Undertaker challenging Kane and X-Pac
"The millenium bug may have met its vaccine!"
-- Cole on the Road Dogg and Chris Jericho
"These are diciples of the Undertaker. They want to be where you're at."
"*I* want to be where *you're* at."
-- The Undertaker and The Big Show (sounding a little suggestive there, big man), referring to Midian and Viscera
"He's crying like a woman; he should be going after the women's title. Shut up, Michael Cole!"
"Yeah, shut up, Michael Cole!"
-- The Rock and Lawler
"I think Iowa State likes it doggystyle!"
-- Lawler on the great crowd reaction to the Road Dogg
"Everybody around here, they get a microphone, they think they're tough. Well, if you want to be tough, step over here."
-- The Undertaker
"Big Show, Undertaker said that one day he may stab you right in the back. How do you feel about that?"
"King, you make one more stupid comment like that and I'll stab you right in the face."
-- Lawler and the Undertaker
"Welcome, Rock!"
"Shut up; you don't need to welcome the Rock to anything."
-- Michael Cole and the Rock
"Look at him; he's crying like a baby. That is NOT my flesh and blood."
-- the Undertaker on Kane
"How did you let this deteriorate, Michael Cole? I blame you for this!"
-- Lawler after the Tag Team title match turns into a brawl
"Who is booking this crap? The Rock against Billy Gunn; the Rock against Gangrel. Next week, they'll be having the Rock laying the smackdown on the Brooklyn Brawler, for Christ's sake."
-- The Rock
"They're chanting the Rock's name; shut up, Michael Cole, and listen!"
"You can't get Michael Cole to shut up, ever."
-- The Rock and Lawler
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