Newsies Top Ten List
Okay..so I'm not David Letterman, and these my not be funny. But, I thought it was a good idea. These were written a -long- time ago when I was a new fan, but some opinions have changed ((like, I like Crutchy now)), but I haven't changed the lists.
Top Ten Provoking Newsie Thoughts
10. The World will feel the fire and finally know. *Hmm*
9. It’s okay to shave when you don’t have any growth on your face.
8. Jumping over barrels is fun!
7. The "David and Goliath" joke was funny?! *sarcasm folks*
6. Seizing the day is always a good thing to do before having a paper fight.
5. You dream about sellin’ da papes.
4. You ask a person "Does it look like I’m faking it?" when you know you are.
3. Is it strange that your the only customers at a restaurant?
2. Sometimes there’s nothing to eat, but you always land on your feet.
1. Any banker, bum, or barber almost all know how to read.
Top Ten "Who Knew?"
10. Who knew wearing an ugly pink dress with half a skirt missing would attract guys 75% younger than you.
9. Who knew no matter how bad of a thing you did, there will always be a little kid that thinks you’re still great.
8. Who knew being the mayor’s daughter would pay off.
7. Who knew being a "walking mouth" would land you a place beside the leader.
6. Who knew being a scab is a dangerous job.
5. Who knew accessories would add character.
4. Who knew wrapping your hot dog in a certain newspaper article could help save the day.
3. Who knew you can still be intimidating even when you’re a stick. ((think Spot))
2. Who knew if you were the only girl in the movie, you’d get the leading guy.
1. Who knew singing and dancing in the middle of the street is normal.
Top Ten "You Always Know"
10. You always know you’ll never have matching laces.
9. You always know that you can catch a ride in Teddy Roosevelt’s carriage.
8. You always know that Central Park is guaranteed.
7. You always know that if you have a reporter on your side, he will pay for all your expenses.
6. You always know if you don’t know how to dance, just disappear from the scene.
5. You always know that Crutchy will open his mouth at the wrong time.
4. You always know to run when you hear a whistle.
3. You always know saying words like "maniac", "corpse", "lovenest", or "nude" can make a stupid girl giggle.
2. You always know that if you have a Kloppman, you will always be up on time.
1. You always know how to make yourself look hilarious by using a lot of stupid hand gestures.
Top Ten "Who Cares!"
10. Who cares if you steal someone’s horse.
9. Who cares if you ask for another bowl of soup and don’t eat it.
8. Who cares if you say "I didn't do it".
7. Who cares if you buy your papes then don’t sellin’ ‘em.
6. Who cares if you’re standing behind the guy who’s trying to put you back in jail.
5.Who cares if you dance on top of a public restaurant’s table.
4. Who cares if you are just trying to improve the truth.
3. Who cares if your hand touches some else's spit.
2. Who cares if you add water to the soup when it's still the same amount of people eating ((get it? Les is asleep)).
1. Who cares if you annoy the Judge with sarcastic remarks.
Top Ten "Where the heck did that come from?"
10. Jack’s hat. It magiclly appeared on his head.
9. Who’s hand is that on Boots chair?
8. The roof Jack lands on after jumping off another roof.
7. The lint on the nun's wimple.
6. The rope is conveniently located for Spot to swing down on.
5. Somehow Morris Delancey's hat gets back on his head right after Jack took it.
4. All those cigarettes the guys smoke.
3. The duffle bag given to Jack at the end of the movie.
2. Brooklyn newsies can emerge from anywhere.
1. Crutchy
Top Ten Things Never to Do as a Newsie
10. Never show a friend your best shooters, he might use one as a weapon.
9. Never bring your little brother to a show featuring a show girl singing *ahem* certain songs.
8. Never hand out papes individually when you could just throw them off a roof.
7. Never trust a hot tip on a horse.
6. Never let Davey help you when you're trying to escape from da bulls in a crowd.
5. Never take Racetrack's cigars.
4. Never hang from a ceiling fan unless you know it will support your weight.
3. Never let Denton print your picture in da papes.
2. Never go anyway without your hat.
1. Never mess with a newsie. Vise Versa, never become a scab.
Top Ten Ways to Watch Newsies
If you have a Newsies Top Ten List, go head and send it in to coneflower24@juno.com.
