Arnold and Gerald decide to play a quick came of kickball with some 4th graders, but of course, Wolfgang and his friends intervene.
Wolfgang: Well, well, well, if it isn't Football-Face and Tall Hair. Better hand over the ball or I'll have to act in an unkind manner. I know it's not Trash Can Day, but I think I could make an exception.
Edmund: (laughs) Yeah, Wolfgang. Toss 'em in the trash.
Wolfgang: Shut up.
Arnold: Come on Wolfgang. We were here first, so why don't you let us play our game and when we're finished, then you can have your game.
Wolfgang puts a hand under his chin and thinks for a moment.
Wolfgang: Hmm, maybe I could let you 4th graders have the ball...
Arnold and Gerald smile at each other and start to make their way to the kickball court. Wolfgang suddenly steps in front of them, blocking their path. He takes the ball away from Gerald and laughs.
Wolfgang: But, I didn't say how long you could have the ball! (laughs)
Wolfgang, Edmund, and the rest of the 5th graders wander over to the kickball court, leaving Arnold and Gerald feeling rather angered.
Gerald: I don't get it, man. Of all the times in the world to play kickball, they want to play when we do. I just wish Principal Wartz would mark off another part of the playground so us 4th graders could have some fun.
Arnold: Yeah, that would be nice. Maybe one of these days Wolfgang will see the light and start acting decent.
Gerald: (laughs) You're talking crazy, man. That's never gonna happen.
Arnold and Gerald sigh again and join some of their friends over at the picnic tables on the other side of the playground. Meanwhile, a few blocks from the playground at PS 118, a girl by the name of Lucy Porter is being dragged along by her mother for her first day at a new school.
Lucy: But, Mom! You know I'm never going to fit in here. So why waste time taking me to a public school? You could homeschool me.
Mrs. Porter: Honey, you know that I don't have the money or the time to teach you. I promise we'll look into it in the future okay?
Lucy: (mumbles) By then I'll have graduated college.
Mrs. Porter: You'll be fine, don't worry about anything. If you need me, just remember to...
Lucy: (groans) I know, I know. Leave a message with Mr. Collins at the department store and he'll get it to you as soon as possible, blah, blah, blah.
Lucy and her mom reach the steps of PS 118 just before the bell rings. She gets a kiss on the cheek from her mom before entering the school.
Lucy: Don't be late picking me up, okay?
Lucy's mom just nods her head and walks toward home. Just then, the bell rings and soon everyone is racing to get inside. Lucy runs over to one side of the school's walls to keep from being trampled by two boys; one with a strange football-shaped head and one with very tall hair.
Lucy: (to herself) This is just great. We move to a new part of the country and my mom decides to enroll me into this stupid school. Oh well, better make the most of it. I'm going to be here for awhile.
Lucy makes her way towards Mr. Packenham's 5th grade class, but doesn't notice the small puddle of water that has gathered from a leak in the ceiling. Lucy slips on the water and crashes to the floor, twisting her ankle.
Lucy: (groans) Oww, my ankle. Oh, man, what else can go wrong?
As if in answer to her question, Wolfgang and his friend Edmund walk out from the boy's bathroom and see Lucy lying on the floor, clutching her right ankle.
Wolfgang: (chuckles) It seems you have had a little mishap on the floors of PS 118.
Edmund: (laughs) Yeah, a mishap. Good one, Wolfgang.
Wolfgang: (rolls his eyes) Shut up.
Lucy: (sarcastically) Yeah, it seems I have had a mishap. Now are you going to just stand there like an idiot or help me up from the floor? I'd offer to get some help for myself, but as you can see, I'm not capable of accomplishing that task!
Wolfgang: Well, considering this goes against all what I stand for, but what the heck. I'm in a good mood today.
Lucy: Oh, gosh. That's ever so kind of you.
Wolfgang: (smiles) I know. (clears throat) Now, Edmund, go over to Nurse Halen's office and let her know that she's got a patient.
Edmund nods his head and leaves. Wolfgang bends down and lifts Lucy into his arms.
Wolfgang: (to himself) If words gets out that I did something like this, I'm going to be ruined.
Wolfgang makes his way to Nurse Halen's office and settles Lucy slowly into a wheelchair that the nurse had brought out for her. Nurse Halen thanks Wolfgang and Edmund before disappearing into the back room to get an ice pack for Lucy's leg.
Lucy: (smiles) Thanks for your help, Wolfgang.
Wolfgang: Yeah, whatever. Just don't tell anyone that I helped you, got that?
Lucy glares at Wolfgang but says nothing.
Wolfgang: Let's leave now or we'll be late for class.
Edmund: But I thought we were going to...
Before Edmund can finish his sentence, Wolfgang drags him out of the nurse's office and down the hall to class.
Lucy: I can just hear what Mom's going to say when she sees me with crutches and a foot in a cast. 'I bet you did this just to get out of going to school. Oh, I knew this was going to happen. I knew we should have stayed in New York.'
Lucy sighs loudly and reaches down to rub her now swollen ankle. A few minutes later, Nurse Halen comes back with an ice pack and hands it to Lucy.
Nurse Halen: This should help your foot feel better and make the swelling go down by the end of the day or not sooner. You won't have to worry about crutches though, or a cast. By tomorrow morning, your ankle should be as good as new.
Lucy: (sighs) That's a relief. Thanks for all your help.
Nurse Halen: (smiles) My pleasure.
Just after the last bell rings for the day, Arnold and Gerald meet with Helga, Phoebe, and Eugene at the playground to play a quick game of kickball before heading home. Helga finds the kickball and meets with the guys over at the picnic tables.
Helga: Oh, we'll just see if Wolfgang gets his hands on this again today. If he even tries to take it from us, he'll have to answer to ol' Betsy!
Gerald: (rolls his eyes) Like ol' Betsy's been able to do anything about Wolfgang before. It won't be any different now.
Helga: (glares at Gerald) Just you wait and see, Geraldo. I'll deck Wolfgang into next week!
Helga doesn't realize this, but Wolfgang is right behind her, listening to her every word. So is Edmund, but he's not really paying attention, which isn't new to Wolfgang.
Wolfgang: (laughs to himself) Is that so, Helga? Well, we'll just have to see about that, won't we?
Helga notices Eugene with a scared look on his face but doesn't really give it much thought.
Helga: (laughs) Hah! Wolfgang is such a dunce. He wouldn't know a kickball from a soccer ball. He probably doesn't even know what day today is! I bet he can't even count from one through ten without asking, 'duh, what comes after three?'
Phoebe: Maybe if we just asked Wolfgang nicely if we could play with the ball for a little bit, he would let us.
Helga: (laughs) Oh, puhlease, Phoebe. There is no way in heck Wolfgang would ever let us have the ball without a fight. And if he wants a fight, a fight he shall have!
Eugene becomes more frantic and begins point behind Helga.
Eugene: Uh, Helga...
Helga: (irritatingly) What is it, Eugene! Spit it out already, sheesh!
Eugene mouths for Helga to turn around and when she does, she's actually speechless for once. Wolfgang reaches for the ball, which Helga gives up without a fight.
Wolfgang: (laughs) Thanks Helga! I'll see you losers tomorrow!
Edmund: (laughs with Wolfgang) Yeah, we'll see you losers tomorrow!
Wolfgang rolls his eyes and leaves for the kickball court with Edmund following close behind. Back at the picnic tables, Helga finally regains her voice and begins to scream out how much of a jerk Wolfgang is.
Helga: Oh, if I ever actually get my hands on Wolfgang, I'll...
Phoebe calmly talks to Helga and they both decide to take a walk. Meanwhile, Arnold and Gerald are talking about the cheese fair that's coming up in a week and Eugene is off riding his bike around the playground. Eugene makes a clean sweep of things, which amazes a few people because he's usually down as soon as he's up, but of course it doesn't last long. Just as Eugene approaches the stairs in front of PS 118, Wolfgang races out of the front doors and plows right into Eugene and his bike.
Wolfgang: (recovering from crash) Why don't you watch where you're going, Twiggy?
Eugene shakily stands up and walks backwards from his bike. Wolfgang lifts his fists into the air and growls angrily. Eugene screams and runs around the playground in a panic. Wolfgang starts laughing and enjoys watching Eugene run around like a fool, and decides it's more fun than chasing him down and beating the crap out of him. Just as Wolfgang starts becoming bored, he hears the doors behind him open. He looks back and sees Lucy slowly making her way outside. She sees Wolfgang leaning against the side of the brick stairs looking up at her.
Lucy: Hey, how's it going, Wolfgang? I don't think you caught my name back at the nurse's office. It's Lucy.
Wolfgang: I didn't know that you threw it. Why are you even asking me how I'm feeling anyway? That's such a stupid question.
Lucy: Well, I was just being polite. (glares at Wolfgang) Of course I can see that politeness is definitely not one of your strong points.
Wolfgang glares menacingly at Lucy but says nothing. He gets up from the brick steps and walks over to one of the picnic tables and sits down. After staring at Wolfgang for a few moments, Lucy spots a box of balloons under the picnic table where he's sitting. She gets an idea and acts quickly. Lucy sneaks over to the table, and just as she about has her hand on a balloon, Wolfgang taps her on the shoulder.
Wolfang: Hey, there. What do you think you're doing?
Lucy gets out from under the table and stares into Wolfgang's inquisitive face.
Lucy: (glares) None of your business, Wolfgang. And if it were any of your business, I wouldn't tell you anyway, because you're a big jerk!
Lucy heard some gasps of kids on the playground as they began to form around her and Wolfgang. Wolfgang slowly stood up and stared at Lucy with his teeth bared.
Wolfgang: What did you just say?
Lucy: (shouts) Are you deaf as well as stupid? I said you're a big jerk! I don't have any idea why your friend Edmund hangs around you like he does. He should have better taste. But then again, what can I expect from someone who's a friend of yours!
Before she knows what she's doing, Lucy shoves Wolfgang out of her way and walks out of the playground. Wolfgang runs after Lucy and stops her before she can get very far.
Wolfgang: (growls) Woah there little lady. No one, and I mean no one, insults me and gets away with it.
Lucy: Well, looks like someone just did. Now if you'll excuse me.
Lucy walks down the street towards home while Wolfgang and the other kids stare after.
Helga: (to Phoebe) I can't believe someone stood up to Wolfgang! I mean, not even I would do that.
Phoebe: It sure is a peculiar change of events, Helga.
Wolfgang turns around and glares at everyone who's staring at him, wide eyed and open mouthed.
Wolfgang: (shouts) Okay, shows over! Move it punks before I take out my anger on every single one of you!
The crowd dispurses and Wolfgang meets up with Edmund.
Wolfgang: (to Edmund) Did you see what Lucy did? Where does she get the idea she can speak to me like that?
Edmund shrugs his shoulders and hands Wolfgang a piece of paper.
Edmund: Trevor found this on top of Principal Wartz's desk and he made a copy of it. He thought you might like to look at it. It's some background information on Lucy. Mainly it's about the problems she'd been having at her last school.
Wolfgang: (looks over paper) It says here that she's been sent to detention 111 times, suspended 6 times and almost expelled from school for setting off the fire alarm.
Edmund: She's worse than you, Wolfgang.
Wolfgang: Shut up. (folds up paper and puts it into his pants pocket) I'm going to go home now, I'll see you tomorrow.
Meanwhile in the Porter household...
(more to come soon...please be patient!)
Copyright © Cher A. 1999