SEATTLE, WA (OCTOBER 20, 1999)
In a move that seems long overdue, Bill Gates is going Hollywood.
The multi-billionaire is using a fraction of his fortune to "make movies that matter, movies that will change people's lives", said an empassioned Mr. Gates from his Seattle-based home.
The first project will be "Clippy Guy: The Movie" based on the Help character that pops up in various Microsoft programs. Described as a cross between "Rocky", "Stand and Deliver", and "Showgirls", it tells the story of a talking paper clip who goes to Vegas to forget his troubles and ends up redeeming himself in the arms of a stripper. "It's a story for the whole family; a story of being down and out and triumphing against great odds, much like myself before I became richer than God himself", Gates continued.
Currently uncast, the role of Clippy Guy is being narrowed down to Hollywood's A-list players, with George Clooney looking like the favorite at this point. "He's got that masculine, macho thing going for him, much like myself after I became richer than God himself", Gates said.
"Clippy Guy" is just one of many films in the pipeline from Richer Than God Himself Productions. Other titles in development include the hip-hop musical, "Word!" and the drama "Rotten Apples" about a computer company's downward spiral due to overwhelming competition from a rival computer company, who happens to have a president who is smarter, more charismatic, and better looking. George Clooney appears to be in the running for the rival company president as well.