For...

If I had a star for every time you made me smile,

I would have the universe in my hand

You making living this infinitely cruel world worthwhile

With your smile, you rid this world of its pain and decadence

You make all my worries go away just by walking by

Every time I stare at you smiling and laughing with friends

Or on the rare occasions I'm lucky enough to hear you say "hi"

But there is only one way this could end

Me staring from a far, always just a little out of reach

You're always just a few inches too far away from me

No matter how hard I try and the things endure

You'll never think of me the way I you are adored

I dream about us being together night after night

How I could finally hold you close to me

How this can work because I know it's so right

If you just give me the chance to love you, and you me

But a dream is still a dream none the less

And a dreamer is as lost as his dreams

Because wishful thinking changes nothing about what is true

It just creates a long chain of broken promises

Nothing is ever as it would seem

I know that I'm suppose to be with you

Although it doesn't seem possible

But how can the only think I know that's right

Be the thing that is the most wrong?

Never again...

It doesn't matter anymore, all the pain, all the hard work all the sweat

Nothing in the world matters at all anymore

Everyday is just another day waiting for death

All I've done, all I've tried to do means nothing anymore

The day will not come when I can lift this burden from my shoulders

The day will not come when I can walk a happy man

Life is just one of those things that pain filters

Where nothing you do will help you expand

Everyone of use dies in a miserable heap

No matter the great things you've done, the happiness you've achieved

It'll mean nothing to them, nothing to you, nothing to me

In the end, all a person ends up doing is grieves

It just doesn't to me matter anymore

Nothing I do will be good enough for them

Nothing I say will be the right words for them to hear

Nothing I can think of, will ever be good enough for them

Nothing I will ever become will be high enough in their eyes

In their eyes, I will still be that little boy, that needs their help

That little boy who was never quite smart enough

That little boy who always got into trouble

That little boy

Who just wasn't quite good enough for them

unbearable silence

The once beautiful music of life that I thought endless

Has left me with nothing more than silence

The unbearable silence that drives me to madness

How I miss everything about you and my own existence

There were so many more things I wish I could have done

So many more things I wished to tell to all of you,

Just to sit with you again to see the rising sun

The many things in life that we would do

That dream now is gone, and but the desires still remain

I wish all of you to go out and have that fun and create those memories

Watch those sunrises and have those fun times

Know that I'll be watching over you through your eyes, seeing what you see

So every happy moment you live, will also be mine

Don't let this unbearable silence take over your lives

Live your lives to the fullest

And don't pass up any opportunities

I leave my best wishes with you my friends

I hope you achieve the goals you all stride

Hearts aches will happen but they will mend

Don't let any one stand in the way of your dreams and your pride

You don't know

You don't know the pain I feel when you are with somebody else

How far you are from me kills me deep down inside

I struggle with myself just to keep you at arms length

If you get too close, you will just drift further and further away

You don't know how it hurts to hear you talk about somebody else

How angry it makes me that I can't be the one for you for all of time

I struggle to not let you into my heart with all my strength

If you get into my heart, the pain will just grow in an exponential way

You don't know what it does to me when we are away from each other

Every muscle aches to be with you every moment of every day

Longing for you to be with me so I can hold you close

To show you how much you really mean to me

You don't know how beautiful we could be together

Every minute would be so wonderful if you are here to stay

Longing for me to be the one you love the most

To show you just how much I really do love you

Confused...

Have you ever gazed into your own reflection

and not recognize the person staring back?

Has the person you've given all your affection

never returned it back?

Have you ever stopped in one moment

and think what you in the world you're doing?

Have you ever looked back onto past comments

and not realize how it could have caused so much hurting?

I looked into that strangers face not so long ago

and I couldn't find my true self anywhere

I recently felt so lonely, sad and cold

because the one I loved so much was not near

I had to fight back the tears, hate and anger

to stop myself from doing what I would regret for a life time

I stopped to think when her eyes filled with watery tears

only then did I realize my jokes were such crimes

What If

What if I told you I've been in love you?

I've been thinking of you constantly day and night

That I've remembered every little thing that you do

How can I not pursue something that I know must be right?

What if I told you that you're the girl I've been dreaming of?

I've spent many sleepless nights with you in my mind

That all I want from this life is to have your love

How can I not fall for the most wonderful girl they can find?

What if I told you I wanted you to spend the rest of your life with me?

I've seen us together forever till the end of time

That we could be living the happiest life that's so carefree

How wonderful the way I would treat you if you were mine

What if I told you that you're the most stunning woman I've ever known?

I've never thought I'd see someone as magnificent as you

That we would become such good friends and how our relationship's grown

How could I not love someone as wonderful as you?

To Someone Special

Since the first day I met you, I haven't gotten you out of my mind

I think about your beautiful face and wondrous smile time after time

I eagerly await anything you have to say

For thinking about you gets me through my day

I wish every second could be spent with you

Seeing you laugh, holding you close, just to be with you

I cherish every thought and memory of us together

Whether it's standing on the beach or chasing each other

I take a little time each day to thank God I've found you

I pray that one day, maybe, just maybe we could,

We could be together forever until the end of time

Because you are the best I could ever find

A girl with endless beauty and amazement

With her beautiful eyes and heart of merriment

She makes living this harsh life endearing and worthwhile

You are my guiding star sent by the heavens above

To fill my lonely heart with happiness and love

I've spent all my life looking for you

And now that I've found you, I'll never want to let go

I know how great we could be together

Without you I would wither away and die alone

Live a meaningless life with no real dreams to achieve

So please don't ever leave my life, and leave me all alone

You've been the bright spot of my whole existence

You've turned my life of darkness into a place of light

You mean the world to me

And I hope that you can see that you are everything to me

And I truly do love you

Reborn

The long night has arrived and the world is still

The darkness is all around; there is no more laughter and no more tears

All those lives, all the people that seemed so indelible

Without a trace, has all suddenly disappeared

There are no more bustling towns and cities

No more vehicles and factories to pollute the earth

No more compassion, condolence and apathy

And humans in eternal dearth

As the mother of us all begin to heal

And reproduce all the things her children devastated

The imbalances and rifts are slowly healed

And the scars on her surface are covered

There is a perfect balance between Mother Earth and her creatures

With no interference from destructive forces

Mother Earth rebuilds her pride and joy features

The blue oceans the and the deltas and canals that runs their courses

The roses and flowers are in full bloom for all to see

The green trees are tall and as strong as ever

Until something else comes to challenge what Earth is suppose to be

Until something horrible out of control comes to take over

My proposal

I told you I love you with all my heart

But you just couldn't accept that you had all my love

You kept wondering where I was when we were apart

Even after I proposed to you with everything I am

Yet you still didn't love me the way I loved you

Even after everything I've done, the bed of roses at your door

The time I took you out on a hot air balloon and we flew

Even after I told everyone that you are the only one for me

Yet you still questioned my love for you till this very day

Even though we've been together for what seems like an eternity now

I still can't wait for every new morning when I can call you to say

That I love you more with each passing moment

So that I can tell you that you mean the world to me

To show you my love day after day until the sun stops turning

Still trying to make you open your eyes to see

That I've loved you forever and more from the day we met

Now I ask you what has been on my mind for all these years

That if we could be together for as long as we live and perhaps more

That we leave behind all worries and fears

Now I ask you to marry me and be my wife

I wish

Please tell me that you feel the same way I feel for you

Because since the first day I met you, there was nothing I could do,

Nothing I could say to make you see how much you mean to me

I wish that for even one second you could see how beautiful you are to me

I wish that you could see your grace the way I do

With every movement you make, how immensely I'm moved

All the memories we share are stored deep within my heart and engraved in my life

From the first time on the beach you came into sight

I've treasured all the things about you from your voice to your hair

When I was close up in your face to the far away stare

I've kept every single memory close in my heart and runs over and over in my mind

How we were together that one single glorious time

How I wish we could share another moment like that again

Without and cares or worries and without any pains

It pains me so much to ever see you sad or in dismay

I would take any hurt or pain if it would take it all away

Please don't let me hurt you like I have with others before

Please tell me that we'll end this with no remorse

I love the way you walk, I love the way you smell, I love everything about you

From the way you talk to the way you laugh to everything you do

Only a few years ago

Just a few years ago I would've died for a hug from you

I would've died just to see one single smile from you

Years ago I longed for just one glance of your illustrious face

I sought to just be able to see you happy

Years ago you were in every single one of my dreams

Every night and day I thought of you it seemed

How I loathed every single moment where we weren't together

Every wish I had was to be with you forever

Now it seems every wish I had has come true

Every day I can finally see you

I'm as close to you now as I ever possible can be

And I'd never thought that you'd be this close to me

But things are not the same as it was those years before

No longer is it my only wish to more and more

Now every time I hug you it doesn't seem as special as I thought it should be

You're no longer the one my looks for to see

I no longer use every once of strength to make you content

You are still an angel from the heavens sent

Now our times apart are more bearable than before

No longer when I touch you does my heart soar

Now life without you is easy and nice to live

I just hope you can learn to forgive

Forgive me for all the things I've done and said

And I wish that we could be the best of friends from now till death

In this moment

I could stay in this very moment for a time without end

Watching your body lie lifeless and asleep

Wishing I could spend with you every moment

Holding a love for you that is forever deep

I'll just stare at you for hours on end, never ending

Listening to you breathe every breath

And watching you doing anything you are doing

I think to myself sometimes if life is worth living

If I'm always separated from your precious touch

Living with a heart ache that's never stopping

I miss you with all my heart and soul

Wishing that I could one day see you again

But that kind of optimistic wishing is for fools

Knowing that I'll never be able to embrace you in my arms again

Because you're gone from me now and forever

That we will never be able to again meet in that special place

And never in an eternity will we be able to share ice cream where we first met

But I will always remember those few special moments we had together

All the many times when I could see your beautiful face

I'll always cherish every single second that we were together and everything we've said

Only If

If I should die tonight, I leave it with no regrets

No regrets except for this one small thing

Only if I could see you day after day

If I could always hear your wonderful voice sing

My life would be completed and my existence fulfilled

If I could just hold you in my arms like I have before

Only if we could walk together hand in hand

If you would give me the chance to love you more and more

Every little thing you do, every time I'd dream of you

I can only remember the good times that we had

Those scarce times when I held you so close

Those meager moments where we laughed

I can still see the happiness in your eyes, the amazement in your heart

I can see my happiness and my future in your smile

Only if I could once again see that in your eyes

Only if I could see your smile

Every Time

How nervous I am every time I'm about to see you

I just wish I knew what to say, how to act or what to do

How do I approach a delicate situation such as this embarrassment

Every time I've thought of the perfect words

Every time I try to rehearse exactly what I want to say

But everything has a way unfolding in the most perfect way

I have a certain way of making any good situation worse

I know just what to say and when to say it to get people mad at me

I can turn the most warm and loving person into cold hearted and terse

I sometimes wonder how horrible a person I could actually be

They seemed right the hundreds of times I rehearsed it in my head

But when it comes out making me sound like a total moron

So I guess it's true and so many things are better left un-said

All the little things

It's all the little things that made me love you

The silly little things that no one but me would notice

The way you tie your hair or the way you wear your shoes

All the small things that are beneath the surface

That I find so wonderfully amazing and that I love so much

The little indentation on your face when furrow your brow

The ways that you make me feel every time we touch

The little dimple on your cheek when I make you smile

It's all the little things that's changed my life

The way you now look back into my eyes

The way everything isn't so dark now and so bright

How not everything I do seems like another lie

Those moments with you changed my whole existence

Made my life from a worthless pit of disappointment after disappointment

To a life that is actually worth living just so I can see you again even if just once

Now my days are no longer filled seriousness but full of life and enjoyment

It was all the little things you did for me

How you brightened up everyday just by your cheery self

Just how your pretty face could light up anywhere as far as the eye can see

And every time you were sad would make me melt

I would try anything that I could to make you happy

Sacrifice everything I have for you in an instant

Just to protect you from the harms of the world

So you'd never ever have to hurt again

All I Want

All that I've ever wanted is to make you happy

Just to see your beautiful smile day after day

To make you as happy as you ever possibly can be

Wish there was just a single word I could say

That would erase all your sadness and fears

A single word that would be able to put the biggest smile on your face

And I'd say that word every time we met so there would be no more tears

I doubt that I will ever be able to say no to you

Not when you have that little smile on your face and when you ask from your sweet lips

When I hear that voice and see your face there is not a single thing that I could do

I'm only here to serve you and to help you through your tears and hardships

I still long to be with you to help you through your good times and bad

To be the one that you call when you need a friend

And to be the one who can comfort you when you're sad

I hope that we can be together till the very end

Me being able to be by your side where ever you go and whatever you do

And being able to help you with whatever you may need

So I can help you when you're struggling and make sure you pull through

All I have wanted from life is to be able to see you happy

One Wish

If I could have one wish come true

Then I would be able to spend eternity with you

To be able to hold you closer than ever before

To be able to sit with you staring at the stars

You're the girl I've been dreaming of all my life

I still wish for the day when I can tell the world that you're my wife

Day after day and night after night I've dreamt of you

Dreamt of how there's no one as sweet as you

How there's no one as beautiful as you

No one as perfect as you

If someone could grant me just one wish

The one wish that I could be with you for eternity

I already know that you're the one and only for me

That was the one thing that I could clearly see

I've pictured us spending the rest of our lives together

And how it would be a picture book life filled with happiness

So many different aspects of life together we could discover

As we age together we can end all the sorrow and sadness

As time goes on, my love will only grow greater for you

No matter what happens I'll never stop loving you

I would do anything and everything just for you

Why didn't you say good-bye?

Why didn't you say good-bye?

I told you I'd be back and you know I never lie.

You were that type of person only found in a blue moon.

That's why I was so deeply in love with you,

But then the letters stopped coming

And the phone calls stopped ringing.

Every time I wrote to you,

They all came right back to me.

When I went back to seek for answers,

I just found more questions.

They said they didn't know where you went and your family left.

So for days I just sat and wept.

When I packed my bags and went back home,

I had a few messages on the phone.

To my surprise you it was from,

And from the sounds of it you wanted me to come

But why, when, where?

I thought leaving me at a blank was not fair.

Till this day I still wonder why,

You never bothered to say good-bye.

Why didn't you say good-bye? Part 2: The Healing Process

All I can do now is remember how the rain slowly drizzled down from the skies above

We would stare at a beautiful full moon that's reflecting on the dampened ground

I held you closely to keep you warm and show you my love

While we listened together to the soothing rain drop sounds

I still dream of the days when I had you in my arms every night

The days where I could kiss you and hold you forever

How we would always make up after a long fight

How we made promises about how we would always be together

Now everything you said has fallen apart

You haven't kept a single promise you've made

You've played with me one too many times and broken my heart

Even through all that I still wish that you could've stayed

But you've left me once again without a single word of "Good Bye"

Left me here all alone by myself to sulk in my own grief

There's nothing more that I can do but ask "Why?"

Why did you make promises you couldn't keep?

Why did I believe in you when I know it would all turn into sorrow and pain?

How can I still be the fool I was all those years ago?

I've been through this already so many times and the end results the same

The healing process of the heart is long and slow

But I've done it once before and can do it again

I don't need you in my life anymore

All things in this pain-forsaken life will mend

And one day, I will love you no more

I Will Be Here

If you look in the mirror you will see what I see

The embodiment of perfection and beauty

I was there to wipe the tears from your eye

I was there to give you a hug when you cried

Whether you notice me or not I will be here

I'll always be looking over you so have no fear

I will be here through your greatest accomplishments

And I will be here during your worst disappointments

I will be here no matter what happens, forever and until the end of time

I just wish you'd think of me, if you could be so kind

Because even though I'm gone I haven't left

When you cry I also wept

I will be here through all of lonely nights

And I will be here no matter what else fate delivers

I have made a promise to you, "Always and forever"

And I could never lie to you

So I shall keep my promise to you, even though my life is through

Just think of me and I'll be right here

By your side, always and forever

When I Close My Eyes

When I close my eyes

All I can see is you

When I look deep into my heart and mind

All I think of is you

When I'm dreaming late at night

All I dream about is you

I'm dreaming of you from dusk till dawn

You are my vision of perfection

In my eyes you can do no wrong

My heart smiles whenever you are mentioned

My heart trembles at your touch

My mind is focused on you every single moment

You'll never know it, but it's just because I love you so much

All day my heart aches for your touch and love

But no matter how far my heart extends

You always seem a little too far, a little too high above

My Reason for Living

I wake up in the morning only to see your face

I get up because you are what I crave

I leave the house in hopes of hearing your sweet voice

Just hearing a word from your lips turns me into a vessel so coy

I go to school wondering if I will get close enough to smell your hair

Every minute I think I will get caught in a baffled stare

I keep living just so I can look into your beautiful hazel eyes

I'm saying this with all my heart and hopefully in your heart does mine lie

I only keep going everyday because I will see you

Day after day and night after night, you are the thing that helps me through

Sweet thoughts of you put me to sleep

Dreaming of you leaves me in a trance so deep

And after all of this everyday and every minute

I wake up tomorrow morning to repeat all of it

Every Time

How nervous I am every time I'm about to see you

I just wish I knew what to say, how to act or what to do

How do I approach a delicate situation such as this embarrassment

Every time I've thought of the perfect words

Every time I try to rehearse exactly what I want to say

But everything has a way of screwing up in the worst possible way

I have a certain way of making any good situation worse

I know just what to say and when to say it to get people mad at me

I can turn the most warm and loving person into cold hearted and terse

I sometimes wonder how horrible a person I could actually be

They seemed right the hundreds of times I rehearsed it in my head

But when it comes out making me sound like a total moron

So I guess it's true and some things are better left un-said

Longing For You

You're on my mind every minute of everyday

Next to me forever, I wish you could stay

Every time that you are near

Who I like seems to be so clear

Never before have I seen such a face

A person with such beauty, elegance and grace

You surround my heart with thoughts of your magnificent being

They say that seeing is believing

I wonder how can there ever have been someone as beautiful as you

Only I wish that you knew

That every beat of my heart beats only for you

Every thought I have is one thought about our times together

When we sat outside in the hot weather

Or time spent talking about this and that

Every drop of my blood is longing for your touch

I just wish you knew I love you so

Undying Love

I stare from a far

Yet when you are next to me

I act as if I do not care

However my heart aches as if a plea

A plea that you could love me the way I love you

I have wished so hard just to hold you in my arms

So many times I have dreamt that you knew

That I love every little aspect about you

From the first time your eyes met mine

I knew it was only a matter of time

Before I fell head over heels

I have dreamed that you feel the way I feel

But I know this could never be true

Because I love you so much and only you

And I know you've fallen for someone else

So you can't feel for me the way I fell

Maybe with some luck and time

I'll be able to change your feelings and mind

Or maybe it's better this way

Friends forever, no breakups, no heartaches

No matter what the outcome, all I know is this

I want you to be the first I go out with and the first I kiss

The Day

The day I started loving you

That was the day the pain began.

As long as I love you the pain will continue.

I try to push you out as fast as I can.

My love for you is killing me,

I know once I stop loving you I'll finally be happy.

But I just can't seem to get you out of my mind.

I've tried with every waking moment

If there was a way out I could find.

I've used every last ounce of strength but I just can't.

You must have some hold over my heart

My love for you must surpass my pain

Because I have a smile until we part

Sadly there is nothing left for me to gain.

It is clear to my heart now that I never had a chance with you,

So I should just give up now.

From this day forth I'm born anew,

No more love no more pain is what I vow.

Dream

Only in a dream,

I thought I could see a face like this.

Everywhere you go,

Stunning people you don't even know.

Your long ravishing hair,

Making people stare.

When your magnificent features come to mind,

I know at that moment I could die,

Because the last thing I want to see is your face

Before I was forced to leave this place.

Your appearance ascends every hour.

My heart your beauty has devoured.

No matter how much I dream, you'll never be,

Never be with anyone like me.

Proposal

I've thought about it long and hard

And this is the decision I move towards.

Life would be a beautiful thing,

If you would accept my ring.

I'm down on one knee

And I'm giving this plea.

I show you a little box,

As I do I hear the clock tock.

There hasn't been a day where I didn't love you.

Why I do love you, I have no clue.

Some reason you bring a smile to my face,

And something has filled the hole in my heart's place.

I can't think of another day without you,

Without you my life would be through.

You're the light of my life

Won't you be my wife?

The Unknowns

I've tried to say this o many times so many ways

I've tried to say this to you in so many different places

I wish I could get you alone face to face

If I could turn back the hands of time

I would make you mine

I would correct the mistakes I've made

And ask you what I should've that day

Then, maybe you'd be in my arms now and forever

If I changed my attitude and got a little braver

Then I could be loving and holding you

The greatest pain does not know how you feel about me

I've thought about what I'm going to say hard and long

But no matter how good it sounds in my mind it comes out wrong

Every time we talk is like a well rehearsed play

But no matter how ell planned something goes astray

That's why it's easier for me to put it in words

Making sure everything is perfect in every verse

I could go on for pages and it still wouldn't be enough

So like a poet said, "No matter how out relationship goes, the thing that will remain is out love."